英語幽默小故事

1、英語幽默小故事：認錯 Its Good to Admit a FaultJohn is not a “good” student. He always sleeps in the class. Today he sleeps again. “John!” Teacher says angrily.“What? Whats wrong?” John is awaken.“Why do you make a face? Its classroom. Look! Everyone is laughing.” Teacher says.“No one is laughing.” Teacher say

2、s.“No, its not me. I was not making a face. I was sleeping.” John fells upset.“Um. Not bad. You can admit your fault. You are still a good boy.” Teacher is satisfied with it.英語幽默小故事：女士優(yōu)先Lady First A teacher asked her class: "Is the sentence ' The ox and the cow are in the fields' correc

3、t?" Most of the children said: "Yes, it is all right!" And only one little boy said: "No, it is not correct. The lady must be mentioned first."女士優(yōu)先一位老師問班上的學生：”公牛和母牛在田里“這個句子對嗎？” 大多數(shù)學生回答說：“對，一點不錯。” 只有一個小男孩說：“不對，應該先說女士?！庇⒄Z幽默小故事：畫蛇添足 Adding Feet to a SnakeOne day, Mr. Lion holds

4、 a party. Many animals come and drink a lot of wine. At last there is a pot of wine. Who can drink it? They drink out an idea and decide to have a match-Draw a snake. If you finish first, you can get it.Soon Mr.Wolf finishes drawing. “Yeah, Ive finished. Im No.1,” he says. But he draws again and say

5、s, “Oh, let me add feet and my snake.” At the time, Mr. Gorilla also finishes. He takes away the pot of wine and drinks, then he says, “That isnt a snake. Snakes have no feet. I get the wine.”畫蛇添足一天， 獅子先生舉行一場聚會，許多動物都來了，他們喝很多酒。最后只剩一壺酒了。讓誰喝呢？它們想了想，有個主意。它們比賽畫蛇，誰最快畫好，誰就喝這壺酒。不一會，狼先生畫好了。“哈，我畫好了，我是第一個?！彼f。

6、可是它又畫了起來，它還說：“再給它加幾只腳吧?！边@是猩猩先生也畫好了。它拿起那酒壺喝起來。一邊喝一邊說：“那不是蛇，蛇是沒有腳的，我贏了這壺酒?！庇⒄Z幽默小故事：我不想走路回家 I Dont Want to Walk HomeTom is a very old man. After dinner, he likes walking in the street. And he goes to bed at seven oclock.But tonight, a car stopped at his house. A policeman helps him get out. He tells To

7、ms wife, “The old man couldnt find his way in the street. He asked me to take him in the car.”After the policeman leaves there, his wife asks, “Tom, you go to the street every night. But tonight you cant find the way, whats the matter?”The old man smiles like a child and says, “I couldnt find my way

8、? I didnt want to walk home.”我不想走回家湯姆是一位老人，他喜歡在晚飯后到大街上散步，在7點回來睡覺。但是，今天晚上一輛小汽車停在他家門前，湯姆在一位警察的幫助下走下汽車。警察告訴湯姆的妻子：“這位老人在街上迷路了，他讓我用汽車送他回來。”警察走后：“湯姆，你每天都到那條街上散步，但是今天你迷路了，你怎么了？”這位老人像孩子般的笑道：“我迷路了？我是不想走路回家。”英語幽默小故事：十塊糖 Ten CandiesMother asks her son, “Jim, if you have ten candies, and you eat four, then how

9、many candles do you have?”“Ten.” Jim says.“Then,” Mother asks.“Yes, Mum. Four candles are in my stomach and six candies are out of my stomach. Four and six is ten, isnt it right?”十塊糖媽媽問兒子：“吉姆， 如果你有10塊糖，吃了4塊，那你還有幾塊糖？”“10塊?！奔氛f?！?0塊？”媽媽問。“是的，媽媽。因為4塊在我的肚子里面，6塊在肚子外面，4加6等于10，不對嗎？”英語幽默小故事：明天早上數(shù) Count Tomo

10、rrow MorningIts a right. John is looking at the sky.Tom is Johns younger brother. He asks John “What are you doing?”John says, “Im counting stars.”Tom laughs and says, “Its really dark now. Why not count them tomorrow morning?”明天早上數(shù)這是一個晚上。約翰抬頭看著天空。湯姆是約翰的弟弟。他問約翰：“你在干什么？”約翰說：“我在數(shù)星星?！睖沸χf：“現(xiàn)在天空太黑了。你為什

11、么不等到明天早上再數(shù)呢？”英語幽默小故事：遲到的原因The Reason of Being Lateeacher: Johnny, why are you late for school every morning?Johnny: Every time I come to the corner, a guidepost says, 'School - Go Slow'.遲到的原因老師：約翰尼，為什么你每天早晨都遲到？約翰尼：每當我經過學校附近的拐角處，就見路牌上寫著學校緩行?？垂适聦W英語：笨鳥先飛The early bird catches the wormA bird hat

12、ches six baby birds.The Sixth is very weak and small; his sisters and brothers usually bully him.The other birds usually rob food from his mouth, and the Sixth has to suffer from hunger.樹上一只鳥媽媽孵出了六只鳥寶寶，小六又瘦又小，哥哥姐姐們都欺負它；經常從它嘴里搶蟲子，小六只得餓著肚子。Sisters and Brothers call him “clumsy bird.”哥哥姐姐們都叫他“小笨鳥”。He d

13、etermines to exercise more to be healthier, in order to not be laughed by his sisters and brothers. 于是他決心鍛煉好身體，讓哥哥姐姐們不再嘲笑自己。The Sixth has a strong will and gets up very early every day.He always finishes exercising and eating worms by the time his sisters and brothers wake up.他志氣非常大，每天都起得很早，等哥哥姐姐們醒來

14、，他已經跑完步，吃了蟲子了。When the winter is coming and the bird flock prepare to fly to the south, the “clumsy bird” is the first one to start flying.冬天到了，鳥群要南飛了；小笨鳥是鳥群中第一個飛往南方的。 【文化鏈接】“笨鳥先飛”比喻了那些“本身資質可能稍遜于他人，但是靠加倍的努力趕上甚至是超過了別人”的人，英語中有一個意義相近的短語叫做“The early bird catches the worm.”,意思就是“早起的鳥兒有蟲吃”，但是它并不強調這早起的鳥就是“

15、笨鳥”，更多的強調了“勤能補拙”的意思。所以，如果有一天你很早起床去學校，朋友很驚訝，問你：“Why are you so early？”那你就可以回答：“To catch worm.”（也就是自己把自己比喻成了“early bird”）看故事學英語：滴水穿石persistence/Constant dripping of water wears away the stone. One day, Zhang Guaiya (the county magistrate) was patrolling the government buildings.一天，宋朝縣令張乖崖在衙門周圍巡行。He sa

16、w a minor official come out from the money vault hurriedly.看到一個小吏慌慌張張地從錢庫中走出來。Zhang Guaiya stopped him and asked, "Why are you in such a hurry?"張乖崖把他喊住問：“你這么慌慌張張干什么?”"No reason." the officer answered.“沒什么?！蹦切±艋卮鹫f。Zhang Guaiya recalled the things stolen from the money vault recent

17、ly. He ordered the guards to search the officer.張乖崖聯(lián)想到最近錢庫經常失竊，便讓隨從對他進行搜查。Consequently, there was a copper piece found in the officers headband.結果，在頭巾里搜到一枚銅錢。Zhang Guaiya asked him how much more money he had stolen. The officer refused to admit that he stole any additional money. Zhang Guaiya ordere

18、d that the officer be tortured.張乖崖問他一共偷了多少錢，小吏不承認另外偷過錢，張乖崖便下令拷打。The officer didnt give in and said, “Its nothing to steal just a copper piece. Could it be that you can kill me?” 小吏不服說：“ 偷了一枚銅錢有什么了不起，難道你還能殺了我？”Zhang Guaiya was very angry and sent him to be executed.”張乖崖十分憤怒，就把他押到刑場斬首示眾。He said to all

19、 the people, "Constant dripping of water wears away the stone, let alone stealing everyday."并對所有人說：“水滴不停的滴，就能把石頭滴穿，更不用說是每天偷盜了。”【文化鏈接】“滴水穿石”現(xiàn)在常用來比喻“雖然力量小，但只要目標專一，持之以恒，就一定能把艱難的事情辦成”，簡單來說也就是“毅力”二字，英語中可用“persistence”來表達，這是一個名詞，所以如果想要表達“持之以恒做什么事”的時候，就可以用“persist to do sth”，我們來一起看兩個例句：As long as

20、 we persist to work hard, we can succeed just as constantly dripping water can wear away stone.只要我們堅持努力，總會滴水穿石，取得成功。Study requires the acquisition of knowledge and persistence. Just as dripping water wears away stone constant effort will help us to achieve good marks.學習要有恒心和積累，滴水穿石，才能取得好成績?？垂适聦W英語：如魚

21、得水to feel just like a fish in waterIn the late Eastern Han Dynasty, the country was in confusion.東漢末年，天下大亂。In order to reunite the country, Liu Bei paid a visit to Zhu Geliang who had hidden himself in the countryside.劉備為統(tǒng)一天下，特意拜訪隱居的諸葛亮尋求幫助。He went there twice but didn't see Zhu Geliang. Then th

22、e third time he finally met him. 他連去了兩次都沒見到諸葛亮，第三次才見到了他。Liu Bei explained why he came and explained his noble ambition to Zhu Geliang.Zhu Geliang also proposed some very good strategies.劉備說明來意，并暢談了自己的宏圖大志。諸葛亮也提出了周詳?shù)膽?zhàn)略方針。After listening, Liu Bei was so happy, he appointed Zhu Geliang as his military

23、advisor.He said: "Zhu Geliang to me is as water is to fish."劉備聽后大喜，于是立諸葛亮為軍師。他說：“我劉備有了諸葛亮，就好像魚兒有了水一樣?！盬ith the assistance of Zhu Geliang, Liu Bei's power expanded rapidly, and finally he realized his goal.劉備在諸葛亮的幫助下，勢力不斷擴大，最終實現(xiàn)了目標。Nowadays, this phrase is often used to describe the per

24、son who stays in the environment which suits him/her perfectly, or someone who is very adept at using the suitable or right methods.如今,這個短語常常被用來形容一個人處在完全適合自己的環(huán)境中，或者一個人能夠熟練地應用合適的或正確的方法。【文化鏈接】“如魚得水”用英文可以表達為“feel just like a fish in water”，我們來看一個例句：I've wanted to study at Beijing University my whol

25、e life. I also love the culture and the weather in Beijing. I feel just like a fish in water.去北京大學學習是我一生的夢想。我還喜歡北京的文化氣氛和天氣。我在北京簡直就是如魚得水?？垂适聦W英語：指鹿為馬call black white (and white black)In Qin dynasty, there was a powerful and evil counselor named Zhao Gao.在秦朝，有個很得勢的奸臣叫趙高。Zhao Gao wanted to rebel, but he

26、 didn't know how many people in the court would stand by his side.趙高想造反，但是又不知道群臣中有多少人會支持他。So he worked out a way to test the people.于是他想了個辦法來測試。He presented a deer as a tribute to the emperor in front of the court, and said that it was a swift horse.他在群臣面前送了一頭鹿給皇上，并說這是一匹千里馬。The emperor not accep

27、ting his statement said, "This is obviously a deer."皇上不信，說“這明明是鹿啊。”Then, Zhao Gao took this opportunity to ask the court, "Is this a deer or a horse?"然后趙高借機問各位大臣，“這是鹿還是馬？”In the court, those who didn't dare to go against Zhao Gao agreed with him and said that it was a horse,

28、those who dared to go against Zhao Gao said that it was a deer.在大臣中，不敢反抗趙高的都贊同說是馬，敢于反對趙高的說是鹿。Later, Zhao Gao remembered the counselors who didn't agree with him and persecuted them to solidify his power.后來，趙高記住了這些反對他的人并加以迫害，以鞏固自己的勢力。This story is still popular even today. People use this idiom t

29、o describe someone who calls white black.這個故事流傳至今，人們用這個成語來形容一個人顛倒黑白?！疚幕溄印坑⒄Z中表達“指鹿為馬”意思的短語可以用“call black white (and white black)”，意思也就是“把黑的當白的，把白的當作黑的”，這樣也就是顛倒是非啦看故事學英語：對牛彈琴cast pearls before swineDuring the Warring States Period, there was a musician named Gongming Yi, who played musical instrument

30、s very well.戰(zhàn)國時代，有一個叫公明儀的音樂家，他很會彈琴。There were a great number of people fond of listening to him play, and respected him very much.很多人都喜歡聽他彈琴，人們很敬重他。One day, Gongming Yi saw a cow when he was having fun in the countryside.一天，公明儀在郊外游玩時，看到了一頭牛。He thought, "Everybody compliments my music. Why don&#

31、39;t I play some music for this cow?"他想：大家都贊揚我的琴技，不如我給牛也彈一曲吧!He played a piece of elegant quaint music for the cow, but the cow just kept grazing the grass with its head down.他給牛彈奏了一曲古雅的曲子，牛埋頭吃草不理他。He played another piece of joyful music, but the cow still kept its head down to graze the grass

32、and totally ignored him.他又彈奏了一曲歡快的曲子，牛依然埋頭吃草不理他。Gongming Yi was so disappointed and started to question his ability.公明儀拿出自己的全部本領， 結果牛還是不理他。公明儀非常失望，開始懷疑自己的琴技。A passerby said to him,"It's not because your ability is bad. It is because the cow can not understand music at all."路人說：“不是你彈的琴不

33、好，而是牛根本聽不懂啊!”【文化鏈接】“對牛彈琴”現(xiàn)在常用來比喻對愚人談論高深的道理，白費口舌，英文中可以用“cast pearls before swine”來表達相應的意思，也就是“即使把珍珠丟到豬的面前，豬也不會珍惜在意”,同時也頗有“明珠暗投”的意味。來一起看一個例句：Don't waste your time and breath. It's not worth casting pearls before swine!別浪費你的時間和精力了，不值得和他對牛彈琴！看故事學英語：孔融讓梨Kong Rong gave away bigger pearsIn the East

34、ern Han Dynasty, there was a person called Kong Rong. He was very smart ever since he was a little boy. He had five older brothers and one younger brother.東漢時候，有個叫孔融的人。他小時候很聰明，有五個哥哥，一個弟弟。One day his father bought some pears, picking one of the largest and giving it to Kong Rong deliberately. But Kon

35、g Rong shook his head and picked up the smallest one.一天爸爸買了一些梨子，特意撿了一個最大的給孔融，孔融卻搖頭不要，拿了一個最小的梨。His dad was very curious, and asked: “Why?”爸爸很好奇，就問：“為什么呢？”Kong Rong said: “I am younger, so I should eat the smaller pear, and brothers should eat the bigger ones.”孔融說：“我年紀小，我吃小梨，大的給哥哥吃?！?His dad was very

36、glad after hearing his words, but asked further: “What about your younger brother who is younger than you are?”爸爸聽后很高興，又問：“那弟弟比你還小呀？” Kong Rong said: “I am older than him, so I should leave the bigger one to my little brother.”孔融說：“我比弟弟大，我是哥哥，我應該把大的留給小弟弟吃?！盠ater, Kong Rong became a great scholar.后來，

37、孔融成為了一個很有學問的人?！疚幕溄印俊翱兹谧尷妗边@個故事告訴我們，凡事應該懂得謙讓的禮儀，英語中表達“謙讓謙遜”等意思可以用“modest”，有一句叫做“Modest is Hottest”，也就是“謙虛最迷人”看故事學英語：得寸進尺go too farDuring the late Zhanguo period, there were seven kingdoms on the mainland of China. Among the seven kingdoms, the Qin kingdom was the most powerful one. The ruler of Qin w

38、anted to conquer the other kingdoms to be the ruler of all.戰(zhàn)國末期，七雄爭霸。其中秦國最強大，并圖謀統(tǒng)一天下。The Emperor of Qin intended to attack the Qi kingdom by going through the kingdoms of Han and Wei.秦昭王準備越過韓、魏兩國打齊國。But his subordinate Fan Ju said: "The Qi kingdom is still powerful now and far away from our kin

39、gdom.但策士范雎說：“現(xiàn)在齊國勢力還算是強大，但離秦國很遠。Even if we win the battle, we must guard the land of Qi by passing through the kingdoms of Han and Wei.即使打勝了，也必須越過韓、魏兩國才能到達，很難守住。What if we slowly expand the amount of land we control from here? So we can firmly control every inch of land we conquer. And in the end we

40、 will be the ruler."所以不如慢慢向外拓展，這樣所得的每一寸一尺土地，都 將穩(wěn)穩(wěn)當當?shù)貫榍貒鶕碛?，這樣就能逐漸統(tǒng)一天下了?！盩he Emperor adopted his suggestion, and won many battles.秦昭王便采用了這個策略，果然在許多戰(zhàn)役中取得勝利?！疚幕溄印楷F(xiàn)在我們通常會用“得寸進尺”來表達一個人“做事做的太過分”，英語中常用“go too far”,比如：I didn't mind at first, but now you've gone too far.起先我并不在意，但現(xiàn)在你已經得寸進尺了?？垂适聦W英語：守株待兔get on a gravy trainOnce upon a