朋友一生一起走 中英互譯

一個(gè)人命里不見(jiàn)得有太太或丈夫，但絕對(duì)不可能沒(méi)有朋友。即使是荒島上的魯濱遜，也不免需要一個(gè)“禮拜五”。一個(gè)人不能選擇父母，但是除了魯濱遜之外，每個(gè)人都可以選擇自己的朋友。照說(shuō)選來(lái)的東西，應(yīng)該符合自己的理想才對(duì)，但是事實(shí)又不盡然。你選別人，別人也選你。被選，是一種榮譽(yù)，但不一定是一件樂(lè)事。來(lái)按你門(mén)鈴的人很多，豈能人人都令你“喜出望外”呢？大致說(shuō)來(lái)，按鈴的人可以分為下列四型：Apersonmayhavenowifeorhusbandintheirlifetime,butitisabsolutelyimpossibletohavenofriends.EvenRobinsonCrusoeonadesolateislandwasbadlyinneedofa“Friday”.Onecannotchoosehisorherparents,butexceptforRobinson,everybodycanhavethefreedomtochoosefriends.Itistruethatone’schoicesshouldbetoone’sliking,butit’snotalwaysthecase.Youpickandchoose,andatthesametime,arepickedandchosenbyothers.Beingchosenisanhonor,butmaynotbeapleasure.Therearemanywhocometopressyourdoorbell,buthowmanyofthemcanmake“gointoraptures”?Generallyspeaking,doorbellpressersfallintothefollowingfourcategories.

第一型，高級(jí)而有趣。這種朋友理想是理想，只是可遇而不可求。世界上高級(jí)的人很多，有趣的人也很多，又高級(jí)又有趣的人卻少之又少。高級(jí)的人使人尊敬，有趣的人使人歡喜，又高級(jí)又有趣的人，使人敬而不畏，親而不狎，交接愈久，芬芳愈醇。譬如新鮮的水果，不但甘美可口，而且富于營(yíng)養(yǎng)，可謂一舉兩得。朋友是自己的鏡子。一個(gè)人有了這種朋友，自己的境界也低不到哪里去。先生杖履所至，幾曾出現(xiàn)過(guò)低級(jí)而無(wú)趣的俗物？Thefirstcategory:refinedandhumorous.Friendsofthiscategoryareideal,buttheycanonlybechanceduponratherthanbesoughtafter.Thereareasnumerousrefinedpeopleastherearehumorousones,buthowmanycanyoufindwhoarerefinedaswellashumorous?Refinedpeoplearerespectable,humorouspeopleareloveable,andpeoplewhoarebothrefinedandhumorousarerespectablebutnotawesome,intimatebutnotimproperlyfamiliar.Thelongeryouarewiththem,thecloseryouwillbe,justasthefreshfruityoueat,whichisnotonlydeliciousbutalsonutritious:itkillstwobirdswithonestone.Friendsareamirrorofone’sownself.Ifonehasafriendofthiskind,hisorherowntastewillnotbelow.HowmanyvulgarandhumorlesspeoplehaveyoufoundwhereverSuDongpo,agreatgeniusoftheSongDynasty,went?

第二型，高級(jí)而無(wú)趣。這種人大概就是古人所謂的諍友，甚至畏友了。這種朋友，有的知識(shí)豐富，有的人格高超，有的呢，“品學(xué)兼優(yōu)”像一個(gè)模范生，可惜美中不足，都缺乏那么一點(diǎn)兒幽默感，活潑不起來(lái)。你總覺(jué)得，他身上有那么一個(gè)竅沒(méi)有打通，因此無(wú)法豁然恍然，具備充分的現(xiàn)實(shí)感。跟他交談，既不像打球那樣，你來(lái)我往，此呼彼應(yīng)，也不像滾雪球那樣，把一個(gè)有趣的話題愈滾愈大，精力過(guò)人的一類(lèi)，只管自己發(fā)球，不管你接不接得住。消極的一類(lèi)則以逸待勞，難得接你一球兩球。無(wú)論對(duì)手是積極或消極，總之該你撿球，你不撿球，這場(chǎng)球是別想打下去的。這種畏友的遺憾，在于趣味太窄，所以跟你的“接觸面”廣不起來(lái)。天下之大，他從城南到城北來(lái)找你的目的，只在討論“死亡在法國(guó)現(xiàn)代小說(shuō)中的特殊意義”，或是“愛(ài)斯基摩人對(duì)性生活的態(tài)度”。為這種畏友撿一晚上的球，疲勞是可以想見(jiàn)的。這樣的友誼有點(diǎn)像吃藥，太苦了一點(diǎn)。Thesecondcategory:refinedbuthumorless.Thesepeoplearevirtually

zhengyou

(friendswhowillgiveforthrightadmonition)oreven

weiyou

(friendswithsternmoralintegrity),asdefinedbypeopleofoldentimes.Ofthesefriends,somearewithprofoundknowledge,somewithnoblecharacter,andstillsomewith“bothcharacterandknowledge”likeagoodmodelstudent.Thepityisthatthesepeoplehavelittlesenseofhumor,seldomlively.Youarealwaysfeelingthatthereissomethingmissinginhimorher,soitisimpossibleforyoutofeelthatsomethingsuddenlydawnsonhimorher,ortohavethenecessarysenseofreality.Yourchatwiththatpersonisnotlikeplayingbasketballwiththeballcomingandgoingfrequentlybetweentheplayers;neitherisitlikesnowballing,gettingtheballlargerwitheachrolling.Peoplewhoareextremelyactiveonlycareabouttheirservingoftheball,withoutconsideringwhetheryoucouldgetitornot.Butthepassivepeoplearejusttheopposite,astheywouldbeidleinsteadofbeinghardworking,andtheyseldomcatchyourball.Whethertheyareactiveorpassive,itisyouwhoshouldalwayspickuptheball,andifyoudon’tpicktheballup,thematchwillbeveryunlikelytogoon.Thepityofthesefriendswithsternmoralintegrityisthattheirscopeofinterestistoonarrow,andtherefore,youcannothavea“widercontact”withthem.Theworldissobig,butthesolepurposeofhiscomingtoyoufromoneendofthecitytotheotheristodiscuss“thespecialsignificanceofdeathinmodernFrenchnovels”,or“theattitudeoftheEskimostowardssexuallife”.Youcanimaginehowtiresomeitistopickuptheballthewholenightforthesefriends.Andfriendshipofthiskindissomethingliketakingmedicine,whichisabittoobitter.

第三型，低級(jí)而有趣。這種朋友極富娛樂(lè)價(jià)值，說(shuō)笑話，他最黃；說(shuō)故事，他最像；消息，他最靈通；關(guān)系，他最廣闊；好去處，他都去過(guò)；壞主意，他都打過(guò)。世界上任何話題他都接得下去，至于怎么接法，就不用你操心了。他的全部學(xué)問(wèn)，就在不讓外行人聽(tīng)出他沒(méi)有學(xué)問(wèn)。至于內(nèi)行人，世界上有多少內(nèi)行人呢？所以他的馬腳在許多客廳和餐廳里跑來(lái)跑去，并不怎么露眼。這種人最會(huì)說(shuō)話，餐桌上有了他，一定賓主盡歡，大家喝進(jìn)去的美酒還不如聽(tīng)進(jìn)去的美言那么“沁人心脾”。會(huì)議上有了他，再空洞的會(huì)議也會(huì)顯得主題正確，內(nèi)容充沛，沒(méi)有白開(kāi)。如果說(shuō)，第二型的朋友擁有世界上全部的學(xué)問(wèn)，獨(dú)缺常識(shí)，這一型的朋友則恰恰相反，擁有世界上全部的常識(shí)，獨(dú)缺學(xué)問(wèn)。照說(shuō)低級(jí)的人而有趣味，豈非低級(jí)趣味，你竟能與他同樂(lè)，豈非也有低級(jí)趣味之嫌？不過(guò)人性是廣闊的，誰(shuí)能保證自己毫無(wú)此種不良的成分呢？如果要你做魯濱遜，你會(huì)選第三型還是第二型的朋友做“禮拜五”呢？Thethirdcategory:vulgarbuthumorous.Friendsofthistypearehighlyamusing.Whenjoking,theywillofferyouthemostobscene;whentellingstories,theirswillbethemostvivid;whentalkingaboutrumors,theyarethebest-informed;whensocializing,theyarethemostpopular;theyhavebeentoallgoodplacesandtheyhavenurturedallevilthoughts.Thereisnotopicthattheycannotsaysomethingabout,buthowtheymanagetodothisisnoneofyourbusiness.Theirlearningliesinthewaythatnolaymenwillfindthattheyarenotknowledgeable.Astothosewhoareadept,buthowmanyadeptpeoplehaveseeninthisworld?Thatiswhytheycanbeactiveinthelivingroomandtherestaurantwithoutlettingthecatoutofthebag.Thesepeoplehaveglibtongue,andifdiningwithothers,boththehostandtheguestswillbehappy.Whatgoesintotheearismuchbetterthanwhatgoesintothemouth.Iftheywereinameeting,aleastmeaningfulmeetingwouldseemtobethemostsignificant,fullofcontentandinstructive.Ifthesecondcategoryofpeoplepossessallthelearningintheworldbutcommonsense,peopleofthiscategoryarejusttheotherwayround:theypossessallthecommonsenseoftheworldbutnotruelearning.Intheordinarycourseofevents,ifvulgarpeoplearehumorous,theirhumorwouldbevulgar,sohowcanyousharepleasurewiththem?Orareyouyourselfvulgarlyhumorous?No.Humannatureisheterogeneous.Whocanpledgethatyouyours