荊珂刺秦王搞笑英語話劇劇本

1、演員表荊軻1 趙 磊 荊軻2葉子繁荊軻3楊春敏 秦王王朝?？痛钅顝?揚 太子丹尹昊妻子荊軻袁德波阿三楊博PPT演示朱興偉開幕荊珂刺秦王搞笑英語話劇劇本 Long ago there was a crazy country,in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways.Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman and was sent to kill king of Qing, “Yingzheng. B

2、ut finally he failed. Do you want to know what happened at that time? Okay, next show will tell you the truth.Action IFOR THE Mirror 太子丹上，掏出鏡子梳頭，做自戀狀： Mirror, mirror, tell me, who is the most pretty man in the world? (畫外音：Its you, Prince Dan! 太子丹快樂狀) Thank u mirror! 面對觀眾 Im Prince Dan, the magic mir

3、ror said I am the most attractive man in the world. But Ying Zheng is a jealous guy, I feel he will kill me if mirror told him the truth. I am so scared. So what can I do? (向幕里大叫) Where is my minister? 阿三(畢恭畢敬) : Honey, I am coming. 太子丹：Ive told you again and again that you should call me “my most b

4、eautiful、graceful 、handsome、charming、cute、smart and dearest Prince Dan! 阿三：Sure, honey! I have a good idea. We can find a hero to kill YingZheng 作殺狀太子：Oh yeah. What is the most expensive commodity in this century? Talent人才太子:Good idea! But who is the right candidate? 阿三：After screening I have two pr

5、omising persons on hand. One is Miss LiMoChou, the other is Mr JinKe. Tomorrow they will PK for the NO1 killer of the world. 太子：Well, show me the winner as soon as possible, OK? 阿三：Yes. Action II 天王山之戰(zhàn)荊軻Are you Li mochou?李莫愁Yes.荊軻OK. Im Jingke, you know, I will let you know I am the king of the kill

6、ers world.李莫愁A(yù)re you challenging me? 荊軻Of course! 聳聳肩表示同意李莫愁Come on! 兩人沖上前來“人在江湖漂啊，哪有不挨刀啊，一刀砍死你啊，兩刀砍死你啊。莫愁倒地，荊軻大笑李莫愁痛苦狀：What happened? Why arent you hurt?荊軻: We dont need any reason to win a person. Dont we? Do we? 贏一個人需要理由么，不需要么，需要么？李莫愁：Momma always said: Life is like a box of chocolates, Mochou. Y

7、ou never know what youre gonna get. I got it, Momma is right. 荊軻再次大笑,太子丹上抱拳：How are you? 荊柯：Fine, thank you, and you?太子丹：Oh my God! Could you give me an innovative answer to “How are you? 荊柯：Sure!太子丹：How are you? 荊柯：Fine, thank you, and your wife? 太子丹暈倒 荊柯：Hey, man, Im kidding! 太子丹：Oh, Im kidding to

8、o!畢恭畢敬May I have your name card, please? 荊軻從兜里掏出一卷紙，上面寫著： To be or not to be, thats a question. 阿三：Hero，we need your help. 荊柯：I am busy now! 太子丹：You can get a lot of money. 荊柯：I am very busy now! 阿三：IC, ID, IQ card? 荊柯：I am very very busy now! 阿三(手指上場的美女，沖動狀): Look! She is the most beautiful girl in

9、 the world. If you say O.K., she is yours. 荊柯流口水：I have to say she is a very sexy and beautiful girl, but TCM is my only love! 阿三：What? Whats the TCM? 荊柯; Hey, guy! You look so smart but why you didnt know TCM? Any of them can give you the answer. 阿三：Excuse me? Whats the TCM? TCM?Traditional Chinese

10、 Mm太子丹：I must show you the trump card. Ladies and gentlemen, this is Lipton Slimming tea. It is a brand new product of Unilever China. 荊柯沖動：Slimming tea! I have dreamed of it for thousands of times. My wife always threatens to leave me if I couldnt reduce my weight. 荊柯(誠懇狀) Just tell me what should

11、I do? I will do anything for you. Action 易水送別之泰坦尼克號版荊珂挽著妻子，太子丹,阿三在后. 阿三：Hero, we have already reached Yishui River. 荊珂：Just stop here, please. Farewell, my friends 太子丹：I will miss you, baby. 荊珂面向妻子：Darling, I love you. 妻子：I love you! You mean more to me than anything in this whole world!?肖申克的救贖?荊珂(流

12、淚) ：I love you more. In spite of you and me and the whole silly world going to pieces around us, I love you. (哪怕是世界末日我都會愛著你，選自?飄?)妻子：Well. Be a man, just do it! I will be right here waiting for you.荊珂欲走還留，執(zhí)子之手又曰：Sweetheart! You must do me this honor. promise me you will survive. that you will never

13、give up. no matter what happens. no matter how hopeless. promise me now, and never let go of that promise泰坦尼克號沉船時，Jack對Rose的傾訴. 妻子:I promise.“ 荊軻:Never let go. “ 妻子:I promise. I will never let go, Jack. Ill never let go. 妻子努力擠出幾滴眼淚， 荊珂上船，漸漸遠 妻子：Its a good day to die. Never come back. Never Never (掏出

14、 撥號，阿三接 )： Thank you very much. As soon as I get the life assurance $1000, 000, I will transfer half of it, $500,000 to your account. 阿三：Okay okay! Action IV刺秦一大臣跑在前，一大臣緊隨其后，跑了一圈，便上氣不接下氣。大臣甲掏出 一看：Hey, bad luck. I am late. The bonus of this month has been lost.大臣乙：I am tired. I had been chatting on Q

15、Q until 1 o clock last night.大臣乙看了一下大臣甲：Good. Good. Your skin is fine.大臣甲：I use “ Da Bao everyday.大臣乙：I have heart the emperor of Yan again give our king some good things. Be quick, to have a look.大臣甲：Come on秦王上座，兩個大臣各坐一邊。大臣甲：“Can we begin？秦王“begin大臣乙：“Let the people of Yan， Jingke come in荊柯上。跪下，嚇得直

16、發(fā)抖。秦王：“Jingke. Whats wrong with you？荊柯：“Nothing. Nothing. May be there are lots of fleas on my body “.秦王不煩：Whats the good things， quickly！荊柯獻圖，圖窮匕首見，荊柯舉刀刺秦，秦王摔倒，轉(zhuǎn)身逃跑，其他人抱頭趴在地上。兩個人圍著大臣兜圈，過了一會兒大臣甲喊道：“Mr King, drink the milk quickly!扔了一奶壺，秦王接住，咂了一下，頓時，力大無比，立刻將荊柯打倒在地。秦王:Super rubbish, how dare you kill me?荊柯:Im sorry Im wrong But the prince of Yan told me to。 Please forgive me!秦王：You will never live again. What would you like to say?荊柯：My lovely lady， Once there was a truest love put before my eyes ,but I didnt cherish it. Only after losing it .I found myself regretting. No pains in the world com