An Analysis of the Differences of Family Education Between China and America

1、關鍵詞：family education independence interest differences家庭教育獨立性興趣差異abstract children are the hope of a nation, and family education is the elementary education for children. many serious problems have appeared in our education system in recent years. almost everyone has realized the importance of solv

2、ing these problems and many people have presented a lot of valuable suggestions. there are many types of family education in the world and each of them shows distinctive features and is closely responsive to its culture. and american family education is the most famous one among them. there are grea

3、t differences in the concepts of education, methods of education and results of education between american family education and chinese family education. this paper will analyze those differences from the three aspects, and will mainly analyze of the differences on cultivating childrens independence

4、, interests, creativity, psychological health, fame and the relationship with their parents between the two kinds of family education. the author hopes to find a satisfied family education method through comparing the differences between american family education and chinese family education. at the

5、 same time, the author hopes this paper can provide some helpful suggestions for family education. 摘要兒童是一個國家的希望，家庭教育是兒童教育的基礎。近年來，我們的教育出了很多嚴重的問題。幾乎每一個人都認識到了解決這些問題的重要性，并提出了很多有價值的見解。世界上有很多類型的家庭教育，并且各自都有其鮮明和獨特的特點，反映了其獨特的文化。而這些類型的家庭教育中，尤其以美國的家庭教育最能代表西方主流文化。中美家庭教育在育兒觀、教育方式和教育結果方面都有所不同。本文將從這三方面來對比中美家庭教育，重點

6、分析兩種教育方式在培養(yǎng)孩子的獨立性、興趣、創(chuàng)造力、心理健康、名利觀以及與父母關系方面的差異。通過比較中美家庭教育，作者希望能找到一種比較科學優(yōu)良的家庭教育方式，進而為我們的家庭教育提供有利的幫助。 introduction “children are the expectation of their parents and the hope of a nation. family education is not only an important component of education but also the first lesson to a child, which will b

7、e remembered forever.” (zhao zhongxin, p1, 1991) family education has a direct influence on the qualities of talents. in the 21st century, international competition is becoming fiercer. and it is a competition for talents fundamentally. thus, each country should pay more attention to family educatio

8、n in the education projects. the issue has been becoming a hot topic in our country, and it aroused great concern of our government and all walks of society, in particular the education sector. however, many people think that schools and universities have the main responsibility for these problems w

9、hich appeared in education in recent years. schools and universities are to be blamed, but their parents are more to be blamed. “if the love of the good, the beauty and the truth had been implanted properly in their mind in early years, if they had been trained to use their minds at the very beginni

10、ng, they would not live so foolishly.” (karl weter. p5, 2002) in order to find a better way to educate our children, we should study other countries experiences. there are many types of family education in the world, and american family education is the most famous one. so it is necessary and signif

11、icant to make a comparison of the differences of family education between america and china. this paper is to comparing chinese family education and american family education superficially, which may offer some lessons to family education. i.two conceptions of family education a. american family edu

12、cation in america, parents aims are to train their children to have the ability of adapting to environmental variety and the ability of living independently. based on this concept, most american parents emphasize more to train their childrens ability of independence once they are born. they generall

13、y believe that childrens growth must rely on their own experiences, because they think that children should form a self-supporting will and the capacity to live independently since their childhood. and the capacity comes from the training in the early age. the so-called training contains many aspect

14、s, such as work, temper will, patience, the spirit of hard work, etc. however, the most fundamental training is the ability of adapting to hard conditions. through the process of work, children will form the labor sense, learn some work skills and form a habit of labor. besides, children can learn h

15、ow to overcome difficulties, temper their willpower, develop their talents and skills, rich their knowledge, and form a habit of hard work and thrifty by working in hard conditions. it is just in the unconsciously process that children will obtain the independent survivability and take the responsib

16、ilities for the society. b. chinese family education compared with american, chinese parents have a very different concept of childrens education. some parents in china only care about whether the children have a promising future, a good job, a good life or not. based on these expectations, the majo

17、rity of parents feel that their responsibility for their children is to create as good conditions as possible they can so that the children will not worry about anything in the future. chinese parents would like to provide everything what they can for their children in the process of childrens growt

18、h. in short, they would like to sacrifice anything if their children can live better with their help. therefore, in the process of childrens growth, the most important thing the parents concerning is to developing their childrens intellect, except for caring childrens daily life. in order to make th

19、eir children have a good performance in study, become outstanding, or even become a famous person in the future, they would not let children do anything except studying. as for the childrens independence, civic awareness and their ability adapting to the society in the future, they consider little o

20、r not at all. from these aspects we can find the obvious differences of family education between america and china. ii. two different kinds of ways of family education. a. differences in cultivation of childrens independence because of a fundamental difference on parental concept, there are two comp

21、letely different ways on cultivating their own childrens independence. 1. the cultivation of childrens independence in america first and foremost, chinese family education and american family education vary in the attitude towards independence. most american parents think that the child is an indepe

22、ndent individual since he is born, who has his own willing and characteristic. neither the parents nor teachers have priorities to determine and restrict their childrens behaviors. the declaration of independence says: “all the people are born equally; they are endowed with holy rights including lif

23、e, freedom and pursuit of happiness.( huang shaoxiang，p12, 1979) in order to let the children recognize that they are the masters of themselves, american parents will give their children enough freedom and will not make decisions for them in most cases. american parents willing to respect and unders

24、tand their childrens feelings, thus, they always think carefully about their words and choose the appropriate time to educate their children. the famous basketball star, michael jordan once said, “i admit that our children will inherit some good traditions, but i dont think we should make rules to t

25、each them what they can do, because i think even if they do, they will not be happy. () his words may represent the thoughts and attitude of most american people in family education. in order to cultivate the childrens ability to enjoy independent life, american parents take the measures as follows.

26、 firstly, they try to give them enough opportunities and conditions which allow them to be fully trained in various settings since they were born. the common way the parents used is to let the children do some self-service work according to childrens ability in different ages, because this method wi

27、ll develop their childrens love of working and talents. for example, “there are three children, which are primary school students, in an american family. all of them have their own roles and abilities. the 12-year-old girl cured all kinds of delicious snakes according to different formulas; the 10-y

28、ear-old boy helped his father to mow, water flowers and clean court; the 8-year-old little girl can weave cup mat in various colors.” (jennifer tin, p107, 2005) this is the result of practices from their childhood. it is not an isolated phenomenon in america. this kind of examples, such as primary a

29、nd middle school students doing part-time job, are too numerous to cite. according to the america newspaper stands selling federations convey, there are thousands of newsboys in america. the phenomenon of elder students working in society can be seen here and there, and they are supported by their p

30、arents. an american said: “parents encourage their children to work and earn money in their free time. on the one hand, this will save some expenses, and more importantly, on the other hand, it will develop childrens self-awareness at an early age.” (jennifer tin, p127, 2005)children will understand

31、 the meaning of treasure and know that treasure can only be gained through working, and then, they will know why we should cultivate saving and other good habits. secondly, american parents would like to see their children experience all kinds of difficulties rather than to live in an over- comforta

32、ble environment. they pay great attention to training their childrens mental ability so that the children can face all kinds of setbacks and can survive hard circumstances. so, we can see the following example, in a cold winter morning, the american children get up to deliver newspapers while our ch

33、ildren are still sleeping in the warm blanket. many chinese parents probably think that it is unacceptable, or even think that is “cruel” to children. thirdly, american parents have stringent requirements and regulations on childrens pocket money, although their economic conditions are better than t

34、he majority of chinese families. the principle, how much money they should give their children as pocket money depends on childrens ages and actual demands and the income of the family. what american parents do is to cultivate childrens awareness of frugality. moreover, they do not award their child

35、ren by giving them pocket money, and they let their children understand that the purpose of study is to help them to become a valuable person in the future. according to a survey, it is found that “about 54 percent young students have no pocket money in america, and there are fewer chances to get mo

36、ney from their parents as their ages increase. it is also found that 68 percent american students earn pocket money through doing part-time job in their spare time.”(tin jennifer, p51, 2005) rockefeller was one of the richest men in the united states and the first man earned one billion dollars in t

37、he world, but his children have little pocket money according to the regulations which printed on the title page in his family book. “the pocket money of the 7-8years old children is 30 cents per week; that of the 11-12years old children is one dollar per week; that of the over 12 years old is three

38、 dollars per week. the most important thing is that the children were asked to record every expenditure. if the account is clear and their expenditure is used for legitimate purpose, they will receive additional 5 cents in the next week. rockefeller said: too much wealth will bring disaster to their

39、 generation. ” (james dobson, p175, 2004) his words contains a profound philosophy, it is worth of thinking carefully. 2. the cultivation of childrens independence in china compared with american parents, chinese parents hold a very different attitude toward childrens independence. in china, most pa

40、rents require their children to be obedient to them. on one hand, most of chinese people hold the idea that there should always be a law in a certain community. that is the reason why almost every chinese family has its law both as an illustration and an evidence of the education of children. the la

41、w might be either formally written down on papers or announced orally. the law will be used to give instructions to the children who have done something wrong. apparently, this is very helpful for children, but in fact, it is unfavorable to cultivate childrens ability of living independence. because

42、 there are so many restricts in their lives that they have no chances to learn from the daily life. on the other hand, because of the influence of traditional culture, one should respect his parents absolutely in most cases. so, many parents do not concern their kids feeling, because they think that

43、 what they do for their children is just their childrens needs. it is well known that in the later of last century, for the sake of sustainable and harmonious development, our country has carried out the one child policy as family planning, for this reason theres an increasing number of families wit

44、h one child, and chinese children, since long ago, have been considered as the apple in their parents eyes. based on the above reasons, parents tend to over-indulge their children in a surprising way that seems absurd to westerns. it is not surprising to see that chinese parents always try to do alm

45、ost everything for their children, such as helping them to washing, cooking meals, bathing, etc. in short, many chinese parents, especially the parents with one child, arrange and decide everything for their children or even become the substitution of their children almost in all aspects of life. th

46、erefore, the children have no chances to experience and contact with the society. the serious consequence is that many children cannot do these things what they should do in their age. for instance, the three-year-old children cannot wear by themselves, the six-year-old children cannot tie their own

47、 shoes. “in the city, the primary school students need their parents to accompany with them to go to school and go home, and they let their parents take bags for them; manymiddle school students cannot wash their own clothes; the most serious thing is that many university students need their parents

48、 to accompany them to enroll at the first year.” (qi xin, p58, 2005) in a word, many parents finish everything for their children. besides, they protect their children excessively in social activities. many parents fear that their children will face a lot of difficulties or become bad boys in the so

49、ciety; they always reduce their childrens chances to contact with society or do not let them go to the outside alone. once there is a dispute or an unpleasant thing happened between their children, they usually do not like to learn the truth but only accuse others. that makes the dispute into a seri

50、ously conflict or a dispute among parents. these parents always are proud of what they did for their children, because they think that they have safeguarded the interests of their children. but, in fact, they do not realized that what they did for their kids have a negative effect on the childrens g

51、rowth because these behaviors have deprived of their childrens right and opportunities to experience the life what they should learn in the early age. and they maybe have no chances to learn how to distinguish between right and wrong. at last, they are always laissez-faire to their children on econo

52、my. many chinese parents are obedient to their childrens any requirements on economy. both rich families and poor families are likely to fulfill their childrens requirements without preconditions, because they hope their children have a superior sense when compared with others in material conditions

53、. they save money from each expenditure or borrow from others to meet their kids demands. the serious result of these parents behaviors is that children can not understand the difficulties of life and do not know why they should save. the worst consequence is that many children do not like to do the

54、ir own work, but ask others to do it for them by the means of giving others money. we can see this kind of phenomenon here and there in our daily life. this is the direct consequence of the laissez-faire on economy.b. differences in the cultivation of childrens interests the attitude on childrens in

55、terest is also very different between american and chinese. in the united states, children are encouraged and induced to developing their interest and do the things what they are interested in. american parents will not prevent their children from doing what they like to do, and will not they enforc

56、e their children to do what they do not like either. for instance, jefferson, a fifteen-year-old child of a common family, likes to play basketball, i wanted to make him become a lawyer, but he became interested in playing ball when he was young. we dont like him to give up his study, but after a lo

57、ng talk with him, i felt that he had his own idea of life, perhaps he should become independent, and so i gave up my mind.” ()his father said. maybe at the beginning the parents have requirements for their children, but at last their own choices are the most important, in the united states. but in c

58、hina, many parents never consider or respect their childrens interests. because of historical and traditional reason, almost everyone thinks that scholars should be respected without any doubts and have high status in the society. so they pay great attention on their childrens studies because they b

59、elieve that knowledge can change onesfate. in fact, scholars are respected by people in most time. hence, the parents hope that their children can obtain the same honor like the scholars in the future. without thinking carefully and researching, we can conclude from practices in daily life that some chinese parents, if not many, have been strangling their childrens interests in a way that is elusive to american. to be concrete, under the current chinese family educatio