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高三一輪復習之寫作指導
韓彥瑾
沈陽二中.
Howtoimprovewriting?.第五檔〔很好〕〔21—25分完全完成了試題規(guī)定的任務?!采w所有內(nèi)容要點?!獞昧溯^多的語法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯?!Z法結(jié)構(gòu)或詞匯方面有些許錯誤,但為盡力使用較復雜結(jié)構(gòu)或高級詞匯所致;具有較強的語言運用能力。—有效地使用了句間的連接成份,使全文結(jié)構(gòu)緊湊。完全到達了預期的寫作目的。.第四檔〔好〕〔16-20分〕完全完成了試題規(guī)定的任務?!m然漏掉一、二個次重點,但覆蓋所有主要內(nèi)容。—應用的語法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯能滿足任務的需要?!Z法結(jié)構(gòu)會詞匯方面應用根本準確,些許錯誤主要是因嘗試叫復雜語法結(jié)構(gòu)或詞匯所致?!獞煤唵蔚恼Z句間的連接成份,使全文結(jié)構(gòu)緊湊。到達了預期的寫作目的。.第三檔〔適當〕〔11-15分〕根本完成了試題規(guī)定的任務。—雖然漏掉了一些內(nèi)容,但覆蓋所有主要內(nèi)容?!獞玫恼Z法結(jié)構(gòu)或詞匯能滿足任務的要求。—有一些語法結(jié)構(gòu)或方面的錯誤,但不影響理解?!獞煤唵蔚恼Z句間的連接成分,使全文連貫。整體而言,根本到達了預期的寫作目的。.第二檔〔較差〕〔6-10分〕未恰當完成試題規(guī)定的任務?!┑艋蛭疵鑼懬宄恍┲饕獌?nèi)容,寫了一些無關(guān)內(nèi)容。—語法結(jié)構(gòu)單調(diào)、詞匯工程有限?!幸恍┱Z法結(jié)構(gòu)或詞匯方面的錯誤,影響了對寫作內(nèi)容的理解。—較少使用語句間的連接成分,內(nèi)容缺少連貫性。信息未能清楚地傳達給讀者。.第一檔〔差〕〔1-5分〕未完成試題規(guī)定的任務?!黠@遺漏主要內(nèi)容,寫了一些無關(guān)內(nèi)容,原因可能是未能理解試題要求。—語法結(jié)構(gòu)單調(diào),詞匯工程有限。—較多語法或詞匯方面的錯誤,影響對寫作內(nèi)容的理解?!狈φZ句間的連接成分,內(nèi)容不連貫。信息未能傳達給讀者。.0分未能傳達給讀者任何信息;內(nèi)容太少,無法評判。寫的內(nèi)容均與所要求的內(nèi)容無關(guān)或所寫內(nèi)容無法看清。.比較優(yōu)秀的作文;條理清晰,用詞得當,結(jié)構(gòu)合理,書寫很好;得23分.語言表達流暢;層次清楚;連接不夠;得19分..語言不地道;中文式思維;詞匯錯誤;卷面有涂改;得14分..卷面不整潔;涂改較多;語言錯誤多;層次不清;得11分.用詞不當;語句毛病多;大小寫;標點符號;書寫不清等等;得6分..興奮點1.語言簡潔,層次清晰.2.選詞準確,句式多變.3.內(nèi)容連貫,表達地道,無明顯錯誤.4.書寫標準,卷面整潔..閱卷老師的厭倦點和興奮點厭倦點1語言層次不清,令人感到單調(diào)乏味.2.詞匯有錯誤,句子結(jié)構(gòu)單一.3.表達不地道,漢語味太濃.4.書寫潦草,令人無法識別.得分較低的作文:1.詞匯錯誤;語言不地道,中文式思維2.語句毛病多;層次不清3.段落層次不清楚;連接不夠;4.書面不整潔較優(yōu)秀的作文:1.語言表達流暢;層次清楚2.條理清晰,用詞得當,結(jié)構(gòu)合理,書寫很好Wordsproblems
SentencesproblemsParagraphsproblems
HandwritingproblemsProblemsof
writing.PartoneDictionwriting(thechoiceanduseofwords).1選擇適當?shù)脑~匯:1Thechildlikes________(seeing,watching,looking)TV.2Therain_______(had,caused,led)alotofeffectonthecrops.3InareaChinaisthethirdlargest_________(state,nation,country)intheworld.4Iwillhavea/an____________(date;appointment)withProfessorLiuthisafternoononmytermpaper.5Finally,ourclass_______(won,beat)theirclass.watchinghadcountryappointmentbeat.2選擇具體的詞匯3.Heisagoodman.Heisa_________________________________________________man.(具體詞匯)
kind/honest/generous/brave/selfless/warm-hearted…2Thefoodiswonderful.Thefoodis_________________________________________________.(具體詞匯)tasty/deliciousfresh/appetizing…1.Itisoftenbadhereinspring.Itisoften_____________hereinspring.(具體詞匯)windyanddusty一般詞匯(wordswithageneralmeaning)
具體詞匯(wordswithaspecificmeaning).“走出房間〞,general的詞是:walkoutoftheroom
但是小偷走出房間應該說:slipoutoftheroom
小姐走出房間應該說:sailoutoftheroom
小孩走出房間應該說:danceoutoftheroom
老人走出房間應該說:staggeroutoftheroom
.3選擇書面的詞語1Itishardtogetthegeneralideaofthisarticle.(口)Itis______to_______thegeneralideaofthis…(書)2Afriendisaguyyoucandependonwhenyouareintrouble.(口)Afriendisa_______youcandependonwhenyouareintrouble.(書)3Ateacherissomeone/somebodywhohelpswithyourstudies.(口)Ateacherisa______whohelpswithyourstudies.(書)difficultgrasppersonperson.4.不要用中文的思維來寫英語詞匯:(chinglish)
1新年就要到了.TheNewYearisgoingtoarrive.2光陰似箭!Timeislikeanarrow!3接receivethephone4人山人海peoplemountainpeoplesea5.好好學習,天天向上Goodgoodstudy,daydayup
TheNewYearisaroundthecorner.Timesflies!AnswerthephonehundredsofthousandsofpeopleStudyhardandyou’llmakeprogresseveryday..ParttwoSentencewriting.1句子要簡潔,不要啰嗦1Mr.SmithusuallylikestodrinkallkindsofwinesthatareproducedinFrance.(wordy)Mr.Smith_________________________(concise)2WhenIpushedthedooropen,Isawagroupofyoungpeople.(wordy)____________________,Isawagroupofyoungpeople.(concise)3Sheisattractiveinappearance,butsheisaratherfoolishperson.Sheis__________,but_________________prefersFrenchwine.Pushingthedooropen,attractiveratherfoolish..2句子符合語法規(guī)那么,不要犯語法錯誤1Thereare40%ofthestudentsareagainstthisopinion.2Seeingfromthetopofthemountain,thecityisnice.3Heworkedhard,therefore,hewasagoodstudent.4Onlyinthiscountryyoucanfindsuchasocialcustom.5Hislefteyeisblind.\_Seen/and_canyouHeisblindinthelefteye..句子與句子間的銜接:注意:別將moreover,therefore,however,nevertheless,forexample,forinstance等副詞性的連接詞當作連詞使用,否那么就會犯堆砌句子的錯誤.Heworkedhard,therefore,hewasagoodstudent.Heworkedhard,
andtherefore
hewasagoodstudent.Heworkedhard;therefore,
hewasagoodstudent.Heworkedhard.Therefore,
hewasagoodstudent..1a)It’stoolatetogotothecinemanow.b)Ihaveanimportantmeetingtoattendafterlunch.It’stoolatetogothecinemanow.__________Ihaveanimportantmeetingtoattendafterlunch.2.a)Gotoseethedoctoratonce.b)Yourcoldmaygetworse.
Gotoseethedoctoratonce,_________yourcoldmaygetworse.3.a)Hesawtheboyinthestreet.b)Hestoppedtospeaktohim.c)Hegavehimapenny._________theboyinthestreet,hestoppedtospeaktohim________gavehimapenny.
句與句的銜接Besidesor/otherwise
Seeing
and.PartthreeParagraph
writing
._______JennyisaCanadiangirl.Wehavebeenpenfriendsformorethanthreeyears._______IfoundherinformationwhenIwasreadinganEnglishmagazineand______Iwrotetohersoon.InmyfirstletterIintroducedmyselfandtoldhersomethingaboutmyfamily.Wekeepintouchwitheach.______,Wealsotalkaboutourschoollifeandourfuture.Shewillvisitourcitythissummer.A.
BelieveitornotB.Ofcourse,C.AsyouknowD.What’smore
Questions:Whereyoushouldputthem?Whatisthefunctionofthem?CABD.
Function:
Theycanmakesentencesinaparagraphcloselyconnected.Theyarecalledtransitionalwords.
(過渡詞).邏輯角度合適的過渡性詞匯時間順序first,second,then,finally/atlast,soonimmediately,suddenly對稱順序foronething,fortheotherthing,ononehand,ontheotherhand轉(zhuǎn)折順序but,however,while,though,otherwise因果順序because,since,as,thanksto,asaresult(of)條件順序aslongas,solongas,onconditionthat,if,unless讓步順序though,as,evenif/though,whether,who(what,when,where)ever遞進順序what’smore,besides,tomakethematterworse,what’sworse過渡性插入語Ithink,I’mafraid,youknow,Asweallknow.
Function:
1.Theycanmakesentencesinaparagraphcloselyconnected.2.Theycanalsomakeparagraphsinapassagecloselyconnected.Theyarecalledtransitionalwords.
(過渡詞).Improvethepassagebyaddingtransitionalwords:Deareditor,________Studentsofourschoolhavemadeasurveyof“ViewsonNewspaper〞.Thepeoplewhomweinterviewedhavetwodifferentopinions.45%ofthepeopleenjoyreadingnewspapers.__________,asaconvenientsourceofinformation,readingnewspapersisnotlimitedbytime.________,readingalsomakespeoplethink,whichhelpsdeveloppeople’sintelligence.__________,peoplecanselectandreadwhateversectiontheyareinterestedin.__________,55%ofthepeopledon’tturntonewspaperstogetinformation.Theyholdtheideathatnewspapersarenotveryattractive_________theylackthesoundandvideothatmakeothersourcesofinformationmoreexcitingtolookatthannewspapers.__________________,peoplecanmakeuseofwhatevermeanstogetinformation,solongasit’sconvenientforthem.Bestwishes,Yours.LiHuaRecentlyFirstofallSecondlyMoreoverHoweverbecauseInmyopinion.
聯(lián)合國教科文組織某考察團正在我國某鄉(xiāng)村參觀考察。假定你是接待人員,請根據(jù)下列提示以發(fā)言稿的形式簡要介紹這個村的情況:
1)大?。航?00戶人家,約500口人。2)變化:過去很窮,78年后變化很大。人們生活比以前好多了?,F(xiàn)已舊貌換新顏。3)教育:原來的學校很小,現(xiàn)已經(jīng)過改建。新建的教學樓有4層,是村里最美的建筑物。村所有學齡兒童在此免費就讀。注意:1)要點齊全,前后連貫。2)詞數(shù):100-120之間。修改例文Ladiesandgentlemen,Welcometoourschool.Thisvillageisverysmall.Ithasnearly100familiesandabout500people.Itusedtobeverypoor.Ithaschangedalotsince1978.Peopleherearericherthanbefore.Nowitistakingonanewlook.Theschoolherewasverysmall.Nowithasbeenrebuilt.Thenewlybuiltteachingbuildinghas4storeys.Itisthemostbeautifulbuildinginthevillage.Alltheschool-agechildrencanstudyhere.Theyenjoyfreeeducationinit.Thankyou..Ladiesandgentlemen,Welcometoourschool!Ladiesandgentlemen,Welcometoourschool!①Thisvillageisverysmall.Ithasnearly100familiesandabout500people.Itusedtobeverypoor.②Ithaschangedalotsince1978③.Peoplehere④arericherthanbefore.Nowitistakingonanewlook.①Thisvillageis
asmallonewith/whichhas
nearly100familiesandabout500people.Itusedtobeverypoor.②
However,ithasch
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