備考2024屆高考英語一輪復習第二部分讀后續(xù)寫專題二熱考話題素材3師生關系

熱考話題3師生關系[2023新高考Ⅰ]WhenIwasinmiddleschool，mysocialstudiesteacheraskedmetoenterawritingcontest.Isaidnowithoutthinking.Ididnotlovewriting.MyfamilycamefromBrazil，soEnglishwasonlymysecondlanguage.WritingwassodifficultandpainfulformethatmyteacherhadallowedmetopresentmypaperonthesinkingoftheTitanicbyactingoutaplay，whereIplayedalltheparts.Noonelaughedharderthanhedid.So，whydidhesuddenlyforcemetodosomethingatwhichIwassuretofail？Hisreply："BecauseIloveyourstories.Ifyou’rewillingtoapplyyourself，Ithinkyouhaveagoodshotatthis."Encouragedbyhiswords，Iagreedtogiveitatry.IchosePaulRevere’shorseasmysubject.PaulReverewasasilversmith（銀匠）inBostonwhorodeahorseatnightonApril18，1775toLexingtontowarnpeoplethatBritishsoldierswerecoming.Mystorywouldcomestraightfromthehorse’smouth.Notabrilliantidea，butfunny；andunlikelytobeanyoneelse’schoice.Whatdidthehorsethink，ashespedthroughthenight？Didhegettired？Havedoubts？Didhewanttoquit？Isympathizedimmediately.Igottired.Ihaddoubts.Iwantedtoquit.But，likeRevere’shorse，Ikeptgoing.Iworkedhard.Icheckedmyspelling.Iaskedmyoldersistertocorrectmygrammar.Icheckedoutahalf-dozenbooksonPaulReverefromthelibrary.Ievenreadafewofthem.WhenIhandedintheessaytomyteacher，hereadit，laughedoutloud，andsaid，"Great.Now，writeitagain."Iwroteitagain，andagainandagain.WhenIfinallyfinishedit，thethoughtofwinninghadgivenwaytotheenjoymentofwriting.IfIdidn’twin，Iwouldn’tcare.Afewweekslater，whenIalmostforgotthecontest，therecamethenews.Iwenttomyteacher’sofficeaftertheawardpresentation.人物主要人物"I"：從文中描述的"saidnowithoutthinking""difficultandpainfulforme""Iagreedtogiveitatry""wantedtoquit...Ikeptgoing...checkedmyspelling...correctmygrammar...readafewofthem""wroteitagain，andagainandagain"可以看出，"我"起初缺乏自信，但隨后變得努力勤奮、信念堅定。次要人物mysocialstudiesteacher：從文中描述的"Noonelaughedharderthanhedid""Iloveyourstories...youhaveagoodshotatthis""laughedoutloud，andsaid，‘Great.Now，writeitagain.’"可知，"我"的社會科學老師樂觀開朗，關心、理解、支持、鼓勵學生。為續(xù)寫第二段"我"來到老師辦公室表達對老師的感激之情奠定了基礎。情節(jié)及情感線社會科學老師要"我"參加寫作比賽（"我"很抗拒，直接拒絕）→他鼓勵"我"參加比賽（"我"受到鼓舞，決定試試）→"我"選定主題開始寫作（糾結、自我懷疑，但還是繼續(xù)堅持）→"我"一遍遍修改、潤色文章（已經(jīng)不在意能否得獎）主題通過"我"前后對待寫作的態(tài)度的強烈反差，體現(xiàn)了要持之以恒地努力，克服困難并從中獲得樂趣和成長的主題；同時根據(jù)續(xù)寫第二段提示語可知，本文也體現(xiàn)了良師益友這一主題，贊美了老師對學生潤物細無聲的引導和鼓勵。續(xù)寫第一段銜接本段首句的thenews，接下來應該是得到獲獎的消息、聽到消息后"我"的反應；銜接第二段首句，本段還應該講到頒獎典禮上發(fā)生的事情，尾句落腳點在回想老師對自己的幫助，與第二段首句完美連貫起來。本段重點描寫消息引發(fā)的一系列心理活動和動作。續(xù)寫第二段銜接本段首句，接下來應該是老師得知"我"獲獎后的反應、"我"對老師的回應；尾句升華主題：個人感悟，這件事對"我"的深遠影響。本段重點描寫"我"到辦公室后師生間的互動，可通過對話、動作、心理描寫等刻畫細節(jié)。1.Ifeltexcited.①用短語beoverwhelmedwithexcitementanddisbelief替換feelexcited，體現(xiàn)用詞的豐富性。Iwasoverwhelmedwithexcitementanddisbelief.②用so...that結構改寫句①，引出"我"聽到消息后激動的身體表現(xiàn)。Iwassooverwhelmedwithexcitementanddisbeliefthatmyheartwaspoundingquickly.③用倒裝結構改寫句②，更加凸顯"我"得知獲獎時的激動心情。SooverwhelmedwithexcitementanddisbeliefwasIthatmyheartwaspoundingquickly.2.IfeltexcitedandproudwhenIacceptedtheprize.①用現(xiàn)在分詞短語作狀語改寫句子并增加副詞修飾，豐富句式結構。Feelingextremelyexcitedandproud，Iacceptedtheprize.②為句①增加"我"的獲獎感悟，照應前文"我"寫作時的堅持和努力，使前后文銜接更緊密。Feelingextremelyexcitedandproud，Iacceptedtheprize，asymbolandrecognitionofmypastperseveranceandhardwork.3.Hecongratulatedme，andIexpressedmythankstohim.①用對話形式展現(xiàn)"我"與老師的互動，使故事情節(jié)發(fā)展更加自然、順暢。"Congratulations！Iknewyouwouldwin，"hesaid."Thankyouforyourencouragement."②為句①中老師對"我"的獲獎感到開心增加肢體動作描寫；并用虛擬語氣表達"我"對老師的感激之情。"Congratulations！Iknewyouwouldwin，"hesaid，huggingmetightly."Thankyou.Iwouldn’tbewhatIamtodaywithoutyourencouragement."③為句②中"我"對老師的感激之情增加心理細節(jié)描寫，使我對老師的感激躍然紙上，更具有畫面感。"Congratulations！Iknewyouwouldwin，"hesaid，huggingmetightly."Thankyou.Iwouldn’tbewhatIamtodaywithoutyourencouragement."Asenseofgratitudewelledupfromthebottomofmyheart.Afewweekslater，whenIalmostforgotthecontest，therecamethenews.Iwonfirstplace！Sooverwhelmedwithexcitementanddisbelief（如此興奮和難以置信）wasIthatmyheartwaspoundingquickly.Finallycamethebigday！Whenmynamewasannounced，Iwalkedontothestageagainstwildcheersandthunderousapplause（在熱烈的歡呼聲和雷鳴般的掌聲中）.Feelingextremelyexcitedandproud，Iacceptedtheprize，asymbolandrecognitionofmypastperseveranceandhardwork.Thinkingaboutthis，Ishedtearsofgratitude（流下感激的淚水），astherewasonespecialpersonwhomeantalottome.Iwenttomyteacher’sofficeaftertheawardpresentation."Congratulations！Iknewyouwouldwin，"hesaid，huggingmetightly."Thankyou.Iwouldn’tbewhatIamtodaywithoutyourencouragement."Asenseofgratitudewelledupfromthebo