搞笑小學英語小品劇本《新守株待兔》

搞笑小學英語小品劇本《新守株待兔》

人物：農(nóng)夫，兔子A,兔子B,大樹。

農(nóng)夫：I'mafarmer.（稍停頓）［走兩步］Acoolfarmer.（掏出墨鏡戴上）［冷酷地走兩步,

突然被絆了一跤，繼續(xù)保持冷酷］Eh...WhenIwasyong,lstudiedinXu~—chuanMiddle

School.So,I'mrichnow!［開始展示名牌，邊說邊掏］Look!Thisismymodern

mobile------NokiaWC250!Thisismywatch!ThisismyMP3!Thesearemyshoes------（夸

張低沉地）ADIDAS!Thisis…［不經(jīng)意地掏出一個蘋果］Oh,sorry.［扔掉蘋果］It'sthis!［從懷里掏

出癢癢撓］Doyouknowwhat'sthis?癢癢撓？Nonono~~Youareout!!lt'smymodern------

鋤頭~!!［看下表］Itistimetodosomefarming!［開始彎下腰做出鋤地的動作］

樹：I'matree!Icandomanythingsllcansing!［做出瘋狂搖滾歌手的動作，哼哼哈

西?。。。輑candance!［跳四小天鵝］Oh?Therecomesarabbit!［引導觀眾看兔子A）。樹站回

后臺］

兔子A：OK.I'marabbit.NowI'mjustwalkingaroundhere.

［農(nóng)夫繼續(xù)鋤地，邊鋤邊上場，突然看見前面有個兔子］

農(nóng)夫：（驚喜地）Lunch!［扔掉癢癢撓］Iwillcatchit!［偷偷摸摸地跟到兔子后面走］

［農(nóng)夫跟在兔子后面。兩個人走啊走。兔子突然回頭。農(nóng)夫假裝看手表。兩人繼續(xù)走。

兔子回頭。農(nóng)夫假裝看天氣。兩人繼續(xù)走。兔子回頭。農(nóng)夫假裝打手機。兩人繼續(xù)走，兔子

回頭。這次農(nóng)夫冷酷地把槍口對準了兔子。］

兔子A：Wahhhh~!（嚇一跳）Whatdoyouwant?

農(nóng)夫:Huh...!IwillkillUforlunch!

兔子A：Wah----------［兔子跑，躲到樹后面，農(nóng)夫追到樹前］

農(nóng)夫:Where-togo?Haha!

［農(nóng)夫開了一槍“砰”（配音）。兔子在樹后驚慌躲閃，沒被打到。樹做出受傷中彈狀。農(nóng)

夫又開槍，同上。農(nóng)夫開始加快頻率，火力密集地開槍。兔子開始時驚慌躲閃，躲著躲著

跳起舞來。樹繼續(xù)痛苦中彈狀。］

兔子A［自我陶醉中，邊跳舞邊說］Youcan'thurtme!Youcan'thurtme!

樹：［痛苦萬分地］But...you…Hurtme....［痛苦地慢慢挪動到兔子背后］

［兔子繼續(xù)興奮地跳舞。農(nóng)夫停止開槍，走到兔子面前，看著它。兔子猛然抬頭發(fā)現(xiàn)］

農(nóng)夫：Ahha~!Byebye!［舉槍對準兔子，開槍，沒聲音，看看槍，示意沒子彈了。兔

子見狀，非常興奮地大笑起來］

兔子A：Hahahaha!Youcan'tk川menow!［興奮大笑，笑到抽筋，笑到后仰。突

然頭撞倒了后面的樹］Wa!［倒地］

農(nóng)夫：0H!［很興奮地過去兩個手指提起兔子］Mylunch,Icaughtyou!!!［把兔子綁到樹

上。打呵欠］tired!I'lleatyouaftersleeping.［倒地睡覺］（打鼾的聲音）

兔子A：［兔子很快醒了，看看四周，發(fā)現(xiàn)自己被綁了，很驚訝］WhereamI?What

happened?

樹：［指著農(nóng)夫］Hehascaughtyouandwantstoeatyou.

兔子A：What?!Imustleavehere!ButhowcanIescape?［東張西望,看到農(nóng)夫的手

機］Amobile!［解開繩子去看手機］It'sNokiaWC250!Wow,howfashion!［放回原處。又自覺地

把自己綁在樹上。突然想起來］Amobile!MaybeIcancallsomeonetohelpme!［又不

知不覺地把自己放出來，那起手機］［做出打電話的樣子］（配音：撥電話）Hello?

兔子B：HellollfsJenny.

兔子A：HeyJenny!

兔子B：Oh,heyMary!

兔子A：Howareyou?

兔子B：Fine,thankyou.AndU?

兔子A：I'mfinetoo!Howareyourparents?

兔子B：Theyarefine,thankyou.AndU?

兔子A：Theyarefine,too!Howisyouruncle?

兔子B：He'sfine,thankyoulAndU?

兔子A：He'sfine,too!How...

兔子B：Eh..eh..eh~wait.Butwhydoyoucallme?Ifyouwantborrowsomemoney

fromme...NOWAY!!!

兔子A：NononolTmindangernow!Comeandhelpme!!!

兔子B：Butwhereareyou?

兔子A：I'munderatree!

兔子B：［邊打電話邊在附近走，經(jīng)過兔子A面前，兩個人還沒發(fā)現(xiàn)］Whatcanyousee

aroundyou?

兔子A：Iseearabbit...thatlooksexactlylikeyou!

兔子B：Arabbit...likeme...OK!TIIfindyou.Justasecond!Waitforme!Iw川helpyou!

［匆匆離開］

［兔子A打完電話，小心翼翼地把手機放回農(nóng)夫處，然后又很自覺地要把自己綁回了樹

上］

兔子A：Haha!Myfriendwillcomeandsaveme?!yeah!［興奮過度，后仰，頭又撞倒樹

上,倒地］（虛弱地）Oh!Hurt!Call110-Or1197112?...Oh,forgetit!Tmdying!［作喉嚨卡住聲音，

死去］

［兔子B上。］兔子B：I'malsoarabbit!I'msmart!Tmlovely!AndI'm（作風情萬

種）beautiful!（自我陶醉）［轉(zhuǎn)頭看自己右手邊，卻發(fā)現(xiàn)兔子A倒在地上］Oh,my!Mary!［伏在

兔子A身上］（哭聲）l'msosorry,Mary!Pmtoolate!5555555----------Mary!［痛苦而夸張地轉(zhuǎn)身

敲打樹］

樹：Oh!Oh,don'thitmeJDon'thitmelTm~~brea~ken![朝地上倒，壓倒兔子B]

兔子B：What?NO..NO!~~...I…can't….breath.....（作死了的聲音）

［農(nóng)夫一覺醒來?？匆妰芍煌米樱軪n..?Tworubbits!IrememerIhavecaughtjust

one?!Oh,thanksgodIHowluckyIam!［興奮地一手提一只兔子，哼著小曲下場］

高考英語情景交際45題

從A、B、C、D四個選項中，選出可以填入空白處的最佳選項。

1.---Jimmycameclosetobeingkilledinatrafficaccidenttheother

day.

?Hewasdrivingcarefullyallthetime.

A.WhenB.What

PardonD.How

2.---DoyouthinkIcanpassthetest?

,I,mafraid.

A.NotachanceB.Ofcourse

C.YoucanD.Alittle

bit

3.NextMondayismybirthday.

---Isthatso?

---Thankyou.

A.Idon'tbelieveso.

B.I,msoglad.

C.Whatpresentsdoyouneed?

D.Manyhappyreturnsoftheday!

4.---Oh,mustyou?Stayabitlonger..

---Thanksanyway.I'vegotanearlystarttomorrowmorning.

A.It'sbeensuchfunhavingyou

B.Maybeyoucanhavesupperhere

C.It'ssopleasanttomeetyou

D.Let'shaveanotherchat

5.--------MayIaskafavourofyou?

A.It'smypleasureB.I'venotime

C.AskpleaseD.

Sure,goahead

6.--------Howwouldyoulikeyourtea?

A.VeryquicklyB.Asitcomes,

please

C.VerymuchD.Idon't

liketea

7.---How'sitgoing,Joyce?

A.Oh,okay,Iguess

B.Notdoingwrong

C.Sorry,I'mnotsogood

D.Nothing,thanks

8.---Kentelephonedyouwhileyouwereout.Heseemedworriedabout

something.

——?

--No,he'11callyoulater.

A.Willhecallagain

B.What?sitabout

C.ShouldIcallhimback

D.Doyouknowforsure

9.---CanIhelpyou,sir?

A.Yes,youcanhelpme

B.No,Idon'tneedanyhelp

C.Ofcourse,ifyoulike

D.No,thanks,I'mbeingserved

10.Ithinkyoushouldtakemoreexerciseeverydayifyouwant

tokeepfit.

A.Yes,OK

B.That'sallright

C.Thankyouforyouradvice

D.It'sverykindofyoutosayso

11.Longtimenosee!Youlookwell.

---------.Youlookfine,too.

A.ThanksB.GreatC.Oh,

noD.Notatall

12.---I?mgoingtoBeijingtomorrow.Myplaneleavesat8:30tomorrow

morning.

A.Isthatso---B.How

wonderful!

C.Haveagoodtrip.D.Well,goodbye.

13.---Don'tforgettoposttheletterforme,willyou?

A.MaybeIwillB.No,Iwon'

t

C.Sorry,Idon'tD.Isupposenot

14.---Ihopeyoudon'tmindmyturningontheheater.

A.NevermindB.Yes,Iwon'

t

C.That?srightD.Notintheleast

15.-------WhoseadvicedoyouthinIkshouldtake?

A.It'suptoyouB.Youspeak

C.That?sitD.Yougotit

16.---DidyougoDutchafterthatmeal,Imean,withtheotherfive

friends?

A.Yes,theydid

B.Yes,theypaidforthemeal

C.No,theydidn't

D.No,becauseitwasmytreatthatday

17.---ThankyouforyourCD-ROM.I'11returnitassoonaspossible.

.I'vegotanotheronetospare.

A.NoproblemB.Nohurry

C.NothingmuchD.Becareful

18.---I'msorryIcan'tgowithyou.

?Haven?tyouagreed?

A.How'sthatB.Whatisit

C.Whydon'tyouD.Whatdoyouthink

19.---Goodafternoon,?ThenameisDavidParks.

---Twoletters,sir,andapostcard.

A.isthereanymailforme

B.couldyouposttheselettersforme

C.whatcanIdoforyou

D.isthatJohnspeaking

20.---David,it'sFrank.Doyouhaveafewminutes?Ineedto

seeyou.

---------.ButIhope“afewminutes,,doesn'tturnintoan

hour.

A.I'mafraidnotB.Itdoesn'

tmatter

C.Idon'tthinksoD.Iguessso

21.---HaveagoodWomen?sDay,mom.

---Thanks..

A.You'rewelcome

B.That'sallright

C.It'skindofyoutosayso

D.Thesametoyou

22.---Excuseme,?

---That?s$35.76altogether,madam.

A.howmuchisthemealwe'vehad

B.butcanItakeyourorder

C.couldIhavethebill,please

D.wouldyoupleasetakethemoney

23.-----HowisTom?

A.Heisateacher

B.Heismuchbetter

C.Heislikehisfather

D.Heistwenty

24.---I'dliketotakeaweek'sholiday.

—;wearetoobusy.

A.Don'tworryB.Don'tmentionit

C.ForgetitD.Pardonme

25.---Excuseme.

-?

---CouldyoutellmehowIcangettotheFirstDepartment?

A.PardonB.WhyC.

YesD.Please

26.DoyoumindifIsmokehere---

A.No,pleasedon't

B.I'dratheryoudidn't

C.Idon'twantyouto

D.I’mafraidIdon't

27.I'msorry,butIcan'tfollowyou.

——OK,it'sB-L-A-C-K.

A.Wouldyoupleasewalkslowly?

B.Idon'tunderstandyou.

C.Wouldyoupleaserepeatitmoreslowly?

D.What?sthemeaningofthisword?

28.Wishyoueverysuccessinthefuture.

A.Sure,Iwill

B.Thanks

C.It'snoteasytodoso

D.I'11domybest

29.Howdidyoufindyourvisittothemuseum,John?

A.BytakingaNo.3bus.

B.Oh,wonderful,indeed.

C.Iwenttherealone.

D.Aclassmateofmineshowedmetheway.

30.---Let?sgooutforadrivetomorrow.Wecantakeapicnic.

A.Yes,dopleaseB.That?sOK

C.GoodideaD.Many

thanks

31.-------I'mgoingtojointheminthegame.

A.Havefun.B.I?m

sureofit.

C.Whatapity!D.Maybeyou

likeit.

32.-------Mydaughterhaspassedthecollegeentranceexam.

--Congratulations!Sheisreallyintelligent.

A.No,no.Sheisnothing

B.Oh,thankyou

C.Sometimessheis

D.Thesametoyourdaughter

33.---Tom,itiscarelessofyoutohaveleftyourkeyinthelock

holeofyourcar.

---------SoIdid.Imighthavemycarstolen.

A.Thankyou.B.I?m

sorry.

C.MyGod!D.It

doesn'tmatter.

34.-------CouldIuseyourbathroom?

---Why,ofcourse.Just.

A.becareful

B.makeyourselfathome

C.keepinmind

D.goupstairs

35.----ThankGod.It'sFridayagain.Aniceweekend.

A.ThesametoyouB.Metoo

C.That'sallrightD.Yes,I'11be

freethen

36.---------Excuseme,Miss,butmayIshareyourtable?

---Ofcourse..

A.NotatallB.Bemy

guest

C.AsyouwishD.Idon'

tmind

37.----Haveasweetdream.

A.Yes,Iwill

B.Thankyouallthesame

C.Allright

D.Youtoo

38.----I'mtoobusytogotothecinemawithyou,John.

-----------Thefilmissaidtobeaverygoodone.

A.That?sallright.B.I’msosorry.

C.Whatashame!D.It'stoo

disappointing.

39.Doyoustillsmoke?

----------.It'stwoyearssinceIsmoked.

A.No,Idon't

B.Yes,Ido

C.Nottoomuch

D.Oh,yes,butIwishIdidn't

40.---Let'sgoshoppingfirstandthengofishingtomorrow.

----------.I'