三打白骨精英文劇本英語話劇

三打白骨精英文劇本英語話劇第一篇：三打白骨精英文劇本英語話劇MonkeySubduestheWhite-boneDemonRoles:MonkeyKing(M)猴哥Pig(P)八戒Tangseng(T)唐僧Shaseng(S)沙僧White-boneDemon(W)白骨精White-boneDemon’Servant(Ws)YoungGirl(G)年輕女孩OldLady(L)老婦人Fortuneteller(F)先知Narrator:It’saverydayinthejourneytothewest,thefourmonksaretravellingintherollingmountains,inwhichliveswhite-bonedemon.AndsheisquiteexcitedtobeinformedthatTangsengiscoming.師徒四人西天取經(jīng)，白骨精途中等待。（1桃花朵朵開）（White-boneDemonwithherservantbehindstepsinthestage）Ws:madam,hereisthefreshblood!Youlooksowelltoday!W:Aha,ofcause!AmonkcalledTangsengiscominganditissaidthatonewhohaseatenhisfleshwillneverdieorgrowold!Whatapreciousopportunityformeitis!Iwillturnintoabeautifulgirltowinhisheart!（White-boneDemonspinsherselfandturnedintoabeautifulyounggirl，thenwaitedforthemonkstocome.）M:master,Ifeelthatthereissomeevilinthisarea!(讓三人站在呼啦圈內)youthreestayinthismagicalringandIwillgotosearchforsomefood!Seeyoulater!(悟空跳出舞臺)G：oh,godgivesmesuchawonderfulchance!(整理妝容，伴奏2音樂起，走貓步上臺)P:hey,master!Haveyougotthesmellofabeauty?T:Absolutely!Er,actuallyIfindsheiswalkingtowardus!G:Howdoyoudo,lovelymonks?Mynameissnowwhite.Youmustbehungryaftersuchalongjourney.Hereissomebreadforyou!P:oh,whatakindheartedgirl!Baby,Idohungryverymuch!Shallweeatthebreadtogether?S:Ithinkshemaybeademon!Becareful,pig!（八戒壓根不理他，色迷迷的走出呼啦圈，走向美女）P:youaresuchbeautiful，andI’msuchhandsome.Shouldn’twebeasuitablecouple?G:yes,I’dloveto!（音樂3mylovewillgoon響起八戒與少女一起做泰坦尼克中的經(jīng)典動作。兩人陶醉其中。沙僧與唐僧低頭念經(jīng)）S:oh,myBuddha!Howcanamonkactasthis!T:ermituofoermituofoermituofo??（3音樂結束，悟空舉著金箍棒跳出）M:yougreedydemon!Dareyoucometotemptmybrother!Gotothehellrightnow!（一棒將其打死）S：master,monkeyhaskilledaperson!P:Apersonwhoisaniceyounggirlwholikesme!T:monkey,doyouknowyouhavemurderedaninnocentyounggirl?Youmustberesponsibleforit!AndasyourmasterImustpunishyou!(開始念緊箍咒)@#￥%）（*&%??￥#?。ㄎ蚩胀纯嗳f分，在地上打滾。舞臺另一邊白骨精上,做憤憤狀）W：whatadamnmonkey!Hum,Iwon’tgiveup！M-a-g-i-c!(白骨精轉下臺，老婦人上。拄著拐，彎腰駝背咳嗽不斷，向唐僧一行走去)L：Snowwhite!Snowwhite!----master,(唐僧停止念咒，悟空站起來對老夫怒目而視，齜牙咧嘴)haveyouseenmy19yearolddaughter?Shewentouttosendsomefoodtosomemonks,buthaven’tgonebackyet!P:er,er,no!Absolutelyno!(老婦環(huán)顧四周看到女兒尸體！忙撲到她身邊。4二泉映月起)L:wakeup!Snowwhite!Wakeup!whokilledyou!M:master,thisisthesamedemon!Shecameagain!letkillher!(躍起揮棒將其打死在地)S：master,againmonkeykilledaperson!P:Apersonwhoisaoldpoormother!M:Nonsense!Sheisademonwhowantstoeatyou!Whydon’tyoutrustme!（師徒正在爭吵時，白骨精在臺上揉自己被打過的地方，計上心頭，旋轉下臺，半仙上臺，舉著小旗上書“賽神仙”，腿有些陂，翻著白眼.）N:whenthefourmonksaredebating,theMsWhite-bonehadcomeupwithanotherideaandturnedherselfintoafortuneteller.F：whatapitythatsuchahandsomemonkhasanincurabledisease！Whatapity!T:areyoutalkingtome?HaveIgotthatterribledisease?What’sit?F:yourlegs!Oneislongerwhiletheotherisshorter!Ifyouletitgoatthatyouwilllosetheabilitytomoveevenacentimeteroneday！M:don’tbelieveinhim,master!He’sthesamedemon!F:shit!WhatIsaidisdefinitelytrue!Youdon’tbelievethat?Letmeshowyou!Followmenow-----(5音樂起。師徒四人跟著半仙開始走。半仙帶著四人瘸著走。繞呼啦圈兩周)S:Ohno!we’realldisabled!P:master,wehavetoacceptthetreatment!M:rubbish!Iwon’tletyoucheatothersanymore!Tastemystick!(一棒將其打死)T：monkey!Youkillthreeinnocentpersonsinarow！HowcanIforgiveyou!Iwon’tbeyourmasteranylonger.Getawayfrommenow!Gowhereveryoulike!M:Master!Youwillregretforthisfoolishdecision!(生氣的離去)（白骨精的奸笑響起，昂首闊步上臺6音樂起）W：Ahahaha!Hethinksit’sfoolishdecision,butIdothinkitcan’tbewiser!DearMr.Tang,doyouknowhowmuchImissyou,especiallyyourdeliciousflesh?（以一種美食家的眼光審視唐僧，不住的咽口水）Er，whichwayofcookingdoyouprefer,fryingorstewing?T,S,P:Monkey!Help!Help!------（悟空蹦出來7音樂起）M:yes！HereIam!Youdamndemon!Ican’tletyoufleeawaythistime!(兩人開始打太極，不一會兒悟空便將她按倒在地，正要拿起棒子打她)T：waitaminute!M,P,S：why?It’sreallyademon!(唐僧鄙視徒仨，拿起自己的禪杖將白骨精打死，徒仨暈倒)T：ermituofu——monkey？M：yes?T:I’msorrythatIdidn’ttrustyou??M:ah,that’sallright!Thewhite-bonedemonistheonetobeblamed!T:ok,let’continueourjourney!M,P,S:allright,let’sgo!（8音樂起）N:herecomestheendofthisplay,butit’sstillreplayedbetweenfriendsagainandagain.Mayyoualwaystrustyourfriendsandbeloyaltothem!That’sall,thankyou!(全體演員上臺謝幕)第二篇：三打白骨精英語話劇劇本ThreeTimesBeatingtheMonster三打白骨精-----七年制開頭出場，視頻《英文版敢問路在何方》(我們利用的是視頻里的音樂)，四師徒出場(等到四人全部出來后暫停視頻)?！颈緞艄舛际侨恋摹刻粕?Wukong，wherearewenow？(悟空,我們現(xiàn)在到哪兒了?)悟空：BaJie，map.(八戒,地圖.)八戒誤拿出一張美女圖，給了悟空.悟空：Oh，master，look！(哦,師父,你看啊!)唐僧：Oh，BaJie，howmanytimesIhavetoldyoudon’ttakethesepicturesofbeautifulgirlswithyou.(八戒,我告訴你多少次啦,不要老是帶美女圖啦!)八戒：Oh，master，forgiveme.(噢,師父,原諒我這次吧!)唐僧：No，IthinkIwilltakethisuntilwegettothewest，BaJie，map.(沒門,我想就由我先暫時保管,直到我們到達西天,取得真經(jīng).八戒,地圖!)八戒：Oh，master，Iamsohungrynow，andIcannotmoveanymore.(噢,師父,我肚子餓扁了,我再也走不動了.)悟空：Fatpig.(肥豬.)八戒：Monkey，ifyousaythesetwowordsoncemore，Iwill，Iwill……(死猴子,如果你再敢說這兩個字,我就……我就……)悟空：Youwill,youwillwhat？(你就想干嘛啊?)八戒:Iwillhelpyoucatchlouses（虱子）.(嘿嘿,我就幫你抓虱子啊!)唐僧:Wukong，Iamhungrytoo，wouldyoubringussomefood?(悟空,我也餓了,你能幫我們去找些吃的嗎?)八戒：Yousee，ourmasterishungrytoo.(你看,我們師父也餓了.)唐僧：Bajie，don’tforgetwhoatemylastmeal.(八戒,不要忘了,誰把我上一餐的飯給吃了.)沙僧：Butmaster，ifthemonstercomeswhilemonkeybrotherisaway，whatcanwedo？(但是師父,如果有妖精來了,而大師兄又不在的話,該怎么辦啊!)唐僧：Yes，thatisabigproblem，Wukong.(是的誒,這倒是個問題.悟空.)悟空：Noproblem！(沒問題.)悟空拿著金箍棒繞著他們跑了一圈……八戒：Thisis……(這是……)悟空：Electricnet，Imadeit，sonomonstercantouchyouifyoustayinit.(這是我織的電網(wǎng),只要你們呆在里面,沒有妖精能進來.)唐僧：OhWukong，youarebecomingmoreandmoreknowledgeable.Knowledgeispower！!(八戒：isfood沙僧：isgirl)(哦悟空,你真是越來越知識淵博哦,知識就是力量啊![八戒:是美食.沙僧:是美女.])悟空：OK,Iamgoingtofindsomefood,bye!（那好，我去找吃的啦，拜拜?。┨粕篛K,itistheshowtime.（好的，現(xiàn)在是我們展示自己的時間啦?。┓乓魳贰陡F開心》，三師徒開始跳舞。一段時間后，唐僧：Iamalittletired,let’splaycards.（我有點累了，我們打牌吧。）放《斗地主》，師徒三人開始打牌。白骨精現(xiàn)身。白骨精：Electricnet？Itiseasy，hahaha?。。▊髡f中的電網(wǎng)？小菜一碟嘛，哈哈哈哈哈?。┌坠蔷兂纱骞贸鰜怼骞茫篊anIjoinyou?（能加我一個嗎？）唐僧：Oh，lady，weareplayingcardsnow，andthreepeopleareenough.（哦，女士，我們現(xiàn)在在斗地主呢，三個人已經(jīng)夠了。）村姑：Oh，chance.（噢，機會。）唐僧：Oh，chance.（噢，機會。）村姑：DoubleKing.（一對K。）唐僧：DoubleKing，oh，Iwin，ladyyouaresoclever，comeinandteachme.（一對K，哦，我贏啦！女士，你太強啦，來，進來教我吧?。┻@時悟空回來了。悟空：Youarethemonster，Iwillkillyou.（你是妖精，我殺了你。）唐僧：Oh，Wukong，whatareyoudoing，sheismyteacher.（悟空，你看看你干了什么，她是我?guī)煾赴　＃┌私洌▽ξ蚩眨?Sheismyteacher!（她是我?guī)煾?。）悟?Sheisamonster!（她是個妖精。）八戒（對唐僧）:sheisamonster!（她是個妖精。）這個地方八戒要表現(xiàn)出墻頭草的樣子。唐僧：Don’tsaythis.（這時放《onlyyou》，當做緊箍咒）Onlyyou……（不要再說了。念緊箍咒。）白骨精現(xiàn)身。白骨精：Wahahaha，SunWukong，Iwillteachyoualesson.（哇哈哈哈，孫悟空，我馬上就給你個教訓。）白骨精變身老婦出場。老婦：Daughter.Daughter.Whereismydaughter?Hello,haveyouseenmydaughter?（女兒啊，女兒啊，女兒你在哪里啊？【對唐僧】你好，請問你看到我女兒了嗎？）唐僧:Yourdaughter……故意作出擋住村姑尸體的樣子（你女兒……）悟空剛從緊箍咒的痛苦中清醒過來，看到老婦。悟空:Youarethemonster,Iwillbeatyou.（我打死你這個死妖精。）聽到這句話，唐僧去擋老婦，孫悟空把唐僧推到在地后，將老婦打死。沙僧扶起唐僧。沙僧：Master，areyouOK?Howmany?（師父，怎么樣，你還好嗎？【伸出兩根手指】這是幾？）唐僧：Two，gameoverSunWukong.（兩個啦，孫悟空，你死定啦。）見唐僧已經(jīng)對悟空產生不滿，這時白骨精抓住時機，變成老頭出來。老頭出場后，看到倒在地上的老伴和女兒，狂奔過去。老頭：Oh，mywifemydaughter，whodidit？（噢，我的女兒啊，我的老伴啊，這是誰干的？）悟空轉身，見又一個妖怪來了，果斷舉起金箍棒就要打。悟空：Youaregoingtodie,monster.（見閻王去吧，死妖精。）唐僧：OhWukong，youhavekilledthreelives.（悟空，你竟然殺了三個人。）悟空:Theyarenothumanbeings，theyaremonsters.（他們不是人，他們是妖精。）唐僧：Monster？Ithinkyouaretherealmonster，yougo！yougo！Itisthewrongway.（妖精？我看你才是真的妖精吧，你走，哪來的回哪兒去吧！【見悟空往錯的方向走了，唐僧指出】走錯啦，走錯啦。這邊。）八戒:Ohmastermonkeybrotherisaway.（哦，師父，猴哥就這樣走啦?。┨粕篋on’tsaythatguy.（不要理那個B了。）白骨精見最強大的孫悟空已經(jīng)被趕走了，高興地出來了，準備享受唐僧肉。白骨精：Hahahahaha，howfoolishyouare，Iwilleatyou，MrTang.（哈哈哈哈，唐僧，你是多么的愚蠢啊，我要吃了你。）原來悟空已經(jīng)識破了白骨精的奸計，是故意離開的，看到白骨精終于露出了原形，悟空奔過來，一棒拍死了白骨精。悟空：Don’ttouchmymaster.（不要碰我?guī)煾?。）沙僧：Oh，ourheroisback！（哦，我們的英雄回來啦?。┌私洌篗onkeybrother……（猴哥……）唐僧起來，迷茫的問悟空。唐僧：What……whathappened？（發(fā)生什么了？）悟空：Master，youwerecheated，themonsterhaschangedintothreedifferentshapes.（師父，你被她騙啦，她只是變成了三個不同的變身而已。）唐僧：Buthowdidyoufindit？（但是你是怎么發(fā)現(xiàn)的呢？）悟空：Monkey’sfeeling.（猴子的直覺。）哪吒:Iamcoming.（我來啦。）悟空：Youaretoolate，哪吒.（哪吒，你怎么來那么晚啊。）哪吒：Whereisthecriminal？（罪犯在哪兒呢？）唐僧：Na~~~哪吒:Hei，hei,youareunderarrest,youhavetherighttospeaktoanattorneybeforeyouspeaktothepolice,anythingyousaymaybeusedagainstyouinthecourtoflaw,letusgo.（嘿嘿，你被捕啦，在你見到自己的律師前，你有權保持沉默，但是你所說的將來可能會成為呈堂證供。我們走吧。）唐僧：Wukong，IthinkIamwrong.（悟空，我錯了?。┪蚩眨篧hat？（悟空裝作沒聽見，什么？）唐僧：Iamsorry?。▽Σ黄?。）悟空：Icannothearclearly.（我聽不清。）唐僧為表心意，與八戒、沙僧一起跳《sorry，sorry》唐僧：Iamsosorry，youaremymonkey.（我真的錯了，原諒我吧，你永遠是我的猴子。）悟空：Iamalwaysyourmonkey（我永遠都是你的猴子。）八戒很不要臉的上去，推開悟空，抱著唐僧。八戒：Iamalwaysyourpig.（我永遠是你的八戒。）眾人噓聲后離開。這時繼續(xù)放視頻《英文版敢問路在何方》，四師徒接著上路取經(jīng)。全劇結束，謝幕。第三篇：搞笑英文話劇劇本(三打白骨精)搞笑英文話劇劇本ThreeTimes’BeatingMonster人物：T唐僧S：孫悟空E：豬八戒J：沙僧B：白骨精B1：B變成的村姑B2：B變成的太婆B3：B變化成的老頭N：哪吒T:Emitofo,doyouknowwherewearenow?S:Bajie,map!E:(摸出，遞給S)S:Look,master(湊近T)………（T、S一齊轉向E）T:Bajie!HowManytimesIhavetoldyou,noftobringthesepicturesofbeautifulgirlswithyou!E:Oh,master!Forgiveme(伸手拿回)T:(縮手)I’llkeepitforyouuntilwereachthewestE:But……T:Emitofo,nothingislust,lustisnothing!Map?E:(遞)Here.Em……wehavearrivedinWhiteTigerMountain!AhIcan’twalkonanymore!(坐)Mystomachdoesn’tallowSo.S:FatPig!E:Monkey,ifyoudaretosaythesetwowordsonceagain,Iwill，Iwill……….S:Youwillwhat(兇相)?E:(軟禁)Iwillhelpyoucatchfleas(跳蚤).S:Hm!T:（輕咳）Wukong,factually,IamabithungryCouldyougotogetmesomefood?E:Yousee,masterishungry,too!T:Baijie!Don’tforgetwhoatemylastmeal!J:Butmaster,ifamonstercomeswhilebrothermonkegisaway…..T:Em…….Itisaproblem.Wukong,doyouhaveanyidea?S:Noproblem!(安裝)（B已躲在一旁偷看）E:Thisis…..?S:Electricnet!Ihavelearnttheenergyofelectricityfrommaster’sbooks.SoImadethis.Nomonstercanapproachyouifyoustayinit!T:Em……Wukong,youarebecomingmoreandmorescientific!Emitofo,knowledgeispower!S:Bye!(走)T:Let’splaycards!(三人開始打牌)音樂《斗地主》B:Hm!Hm!Electricnet?Youaretoochildish.(變成B1)B1:(接近三人，望著)CanIjoinyou?T:I’msorry,lady.WeareplayingFightingAgainstLandlordandthreepeopleareenough.B1:(在一旁觀看)Oh,Chance!Bomb!T:Bomb?(打出)B1:DoubleKing!T:Oh….Iwin!Em……,Lady,youareamaster-hand.Comeinandteachme!(準備開電網(wǎng)門)S:(回來，看見B1)Oh,monster!(上前就打)B1:（倒)Ah……T:(氣憤)Wukong!Lookwhathavedone!Sheismyteacher!S:Sheisamonster!T:Nonsense!(深呼吸)S:Oh,pleasedon’t……T:It’stoolate!(唱)Oncemore……youopenthedoor…(泰坦尼克主題曲，走音離譜)S:Please,Please,oh,no……(痛苦抱頭)T:(嗆住，咳)Wukong,I’mdisappointedwithyou!B:(真身出現(xiàn))Hm!SunWukong,I’llteachyoualesson!(變成太婆)B2:Hello,haveyouseenmydaughter?T:Daughter?...(連忙擋住地尸體)No,sorry!(陪笑，B2想看后面是什么，T擋)S:（咬牙切齒）Youmonster,I’llbeatyouintohell!(S追打B2,B2躲至T身后，S打，不想打到T頭，T暈，S再打死B2)E&J:AreyouOk,master?(扶T)J:Look,(伸食指)howmany?T:Two…..(暈乎乎地)SunWukong,gameover!(變成B3)B3:(看到B1,B2尸體)Oh….,mydaughter,mywife!Whodidit?！(哭喊)S:I’llkillyou,monster!(打)T:（想阻止，未及）You,you.....(險些暈，E,J扶住)Youhavekilledthreelives!S:No,theyarenothumanbeings!Theyarecreatedbymonster!T:Monster?Youarearealmonster!Neverletmeseeyou,go！S:(悲，離去)（音樂，營造“假”悲傷氣氛）《人鬼情未了》E:Master,brotherMonkeyis.......T:Scratch!Don'tmentionthatguyanymore!B:(出現(xiàn))Ha,ha,ha!(三尸體B1,B2,B3在B招手后“飄”走)T:（驚）Youare......B:Howfoolishyouare,MrTang!(E,J去阻斗，被擊退)B:(抓住T)I'llenjoyyourmeatandblood,ha,ha......S:(悄悄走到B后，打B,B暈)Athousandyearslater.T:Wukong?E:Oh,BrotherMonkey!J:Ourheroisback!T:I,Ican'tunderstand......Whathappened?S:Master,yourIQneedsincreasing!Thismonsterchangeditsappearanceintothreeshapesinordertocheatyou!T:How,howdidyoufindout?S:(沉默).......Monkey'sintuition(直覺)N:Excuseme,whereisthecniminal?S;Ah......youaretoolate,Nezha!(對T)I'vecalledthepolice.N:(搖醒B)Youareunderarrest.(出示證件)YouhavetherighttoremainsilentIfyougiveuptheright,anythingyouwillsaycanandwillbeagainstyouinacourtoflaw!(帶走B)T:Wukong(S不理T)Iadmitmymistakethistime(S仍不理)I'msorry(小聲)S:What?T:I'msorry.S:Em?Louder,please?T:I......am......sorry.....(S捂耳)（音樂響）《敢問路在何方》（這個放伴奏）T:Let'sgoguys!(歌)S:Youarecarryingtheluggage,Iamleadingthehorse.E:Saygoodbyetothesun,Welcomeeveningglow.J:Sleepingontheground,againwesetoutsetout,againwesetout.T.S.E.J:Ah......Ah......Sleepingonthegroundagainwesetout.T:Oneaftertheothertheseasonsgoby,andoheaftertheother,theyeargoon.Youwonderwheretheroadis.Theroadisunderyourfeet.T.S.E.J:Youuonderwheretheroadis,theroadisunderyourfeet.....英語話劇劇本TheBusAStoryaboutLoveandStinkyFeet5-6人英語劇本，公交車上的故事，適合大學生活，關于愛和臭腳的故事。FemalestudentA:,FemalestudentB,FemalestudentC,BoyA:WangChiang-ruiBoyB,Oldwoman,SceneOne(Threefemalestudentsarechattingonabus.Becausealltheseatsaretaken,theyarestanding,holdingontosomeplasticringshangingdownfromthebusroof.Twoboysaresleepingintheirseats.Thenthebusarrivesatastopandanoldwomangetson.Shelooksattheseats.Seeingnoemptyseats,shestandsnexttoafemalestudentandholdsontoaplasticring.)Oldwoman:There'renoemptyseats.IguessI'llhavetostand.(Thefemalestudentsfindtheoldwomannothavingaseat.Theywanttohelpherfindonetositin.)FemalestudentA:Weshouldfindaseatforher.FemalestudentB:Right.Thosetwobadboysdidnotgivetheirseatstoher.(Thetwoboyscontinuetosleep.)FemalestudentC:Weshouldfindaseatforher.FemalestudentsA&B:Yes.(FemalestudentAgoestoBoyAandtapsonhisshoulder.)FemaleStudentA:Excuseme,couldyougiveyourseattothatoldlady?(BoyAstretchesandcontinuestosleep.FemalestudentsAandBlookateachother.FemalestudentBtapsonBoyA'sshoulder.)FemaleStudentB:Hey!Canyougiveyourseattothatoldlady?BoyA:(wakesup)IlinedupfortwentyhoursyesterdaytobuyA-Mei'snewalbum.I'mverytired.I'msorryIcan'tgivemyseattotheoldlady.(continuestosleep)FemalestudentC:Whatshouldwedo?FemalestudentB:Let'sasktheotherboy.BoyB:(getsupsuddenly)Ah!All:(startled)Ah!FemalestudentB:Whathappened?FemalestudentC:Whydidyouscream?BoyB:Ihadanightmare.Itwasterrible.FemalestudentB:Excuseme,canyougiveyourseattothatoldlady?(BoyBfallsasleep.)FemalestudentA:Hello!IsitOKforyoutomakeroomforthatoldlady?BoyB:Letmesleep,please.IreadanEnglishnovelallnightlastnightanddidn'tgetanysleep.Canyouletmesleepforawhile?FemalestudentA:Well,we'vetried.FemalestudentB:Theyoungmanisreallybrash.Oldwoman:Thankyou,youngladies!I'mOK!Don'tthinkI'manoldwoman.Iamhealthy.(makesafewkickslikeayoungman)FemalestudentC:Maybeweworrytoomuch.Theoldlady'sveryhealthy.(Thebusdriverhitsthebrakesuddenlyandtheoldwomanfallsover.ItmakesBoyAwakeup.)BoyA:Oh!AreyouOK?Oldwoman:Oh!Oh!Mywaist!BoyA:Youcantakemyseat.(helpstheoldwomantotheseat)FemalestudentC:Hmm.Hejustgothisconscience.FemalestudentA:Yeah!Iwasjustabouttosaytheygotnomanners.FemalestudentB:Yeah.Ithoughthewasacold-bloodedanimal.BoyA:Hey!Watchyourownmanners.I'vegivenhermyseat.I'mreallyverytired.(AtthistimeBoyBisembarrassed.Hedaresnotcontinuetosleep.)Oldwoman:Thankyou,youngman.I'moldanduseless.BoyB:Don'tsaythat.IfI'dgivenyoumyseatearlier,theaccidentwouldn'thavehappened.(Thebusdriverhitsthebrakesuddenlyagain.BoyAfallsdown.)SceneTwo(TheOldwomanandBoyBsitintheseats.BoyAisstandingbehindthethreegirlsanddrowsing.Thethreegirlscontinuetochat.BoyAisdrowsingcarelesslyandbumpsintoFemalestudentA'sbody.)FemalestudentA:Oh!Whotouchedme?(turnsherheadaroundandseesBoyAstandingbehindher)It'syou,right?BoyA:What?FemalestudentB:Why?Youdiditintentionally,didn'tyou?BoyA:Wait.Ididn'tdoanything.FemalestudentC:Youtouchedherintentionally,right?BoyA:Hey,I'mnotthatkindofperson.(looksatBoyB)Hey…Isityou?BoyB:(confusedandshakeshishead)Notme.Iwassleeping.(Thebusdriverhitsthebrakesuddenlyagain.BoyAbumpsintoFemalestudentAagain.)FemalestudentA:(angry)Stillsayingitwasn'tyou?Youpig!BoyA:Ididn'tmeanit.Oldwoman:Nowadaysboysarenotthesameasthoseinthepast.Boysinthepastwereallverypolite.Nowboysarereckless.FemalestudentC:Nowwhatdoyouhavetosay?Apologizetoher.Hurry!BoyA:Alright!Alright!(tofemalestudentA)I'msorry.(FemalestudentAignoreshimandcontinuestochatwiththeothertwogirls.)BoyA:It'snotmydaytoday.BoyB:Gentlemendon'tfightwithwomen.Andshe'snonicewoman.Oldwoman:Nowadaysgirlsdon'thavegoodtemper.Timereallychanged.BoyB:Olderpeopleknowmorethanus.Oldwoman:WhenIwasayoungstudent,Igotlovelettersfrommanymeneveryday.Forthesakeofmanners,Iwentoutwithdifferentmeneveryday.(BoysAandBdon'tknowwhattosay.Suddenlythebusdriverhitsthebrake.TheoldwomanbumpsintoFemalestudentC'ships.)FemalestudentC:(surprised)You.....(TheoldwomanlooksatFemalestudentCandsaysnothing.)Oldwoman:Youhavenicehips.FemalestudentB:Ican'tbelievetheoldwomaniscapableofsexualharassment.FemalestudentC:Maybenowadaysoldpeoplearenotthesameasthoseinthepast.FemalestudentA:Maybeafterlosingherhusband,shefeelslonely.FemalestudentB:Ah!Hereweare.Let'sgetoff.FemalestudentC:We'dbetterstayawayfromthosestrangepeople.(Femalestudentsgetoffthebus.)BoyB:Whoarethosestrangepeople?They'rerealstrange.(helpstheoldwomanup)AreyouO.K.?Thoseyounggirlshavenosympathy.Oldwoman:(feelsBoyB'shand)Youalsohaveapairofveryfinehands.BoyB:(startled)What?BoyA:Thisoldwomanisalsoverystrange.BoyB:Let'sgo!Oldwoman:Don'tbeshy,youngman.Ihaveheldsuchkindofhandforalongtime.(BoyBfreeshimselffromtheoldwoman'shandandgetsoff.)Oldwoman:(looksatBoyA)You'renice,too.BoyA:Hmm,good-bye.(getsoff).第四篇：搞笑英文話劇劇本(三打白骨精)搞笑英文話劇劇本ThreeTimes’BeatingMonster人物：T唐僧S：孫悟空E：豬八戒J：沙僧B：白骨精B1：B變成的村姑B2：B變成的太婆B3：B變化成的老頭N：哪吒T:Emitofo,doyouknowwherewearenow?S:Bajie,map!E:(摸出，遞給S)S:Look,master(湊近T)………（T、S一齊轉向E）T:Bajie!HowManytimesIhavetoldyou,noftobringthesepicturesofbeautifulgirlswithyou!E:Oh,master!Forgiveme(伸手拿回)T:(縮手)I’llkeepitforyouuntilwereachthewestE:But……T:Emitofo,nothingislust,lustisnothing!Map?E:(遞)Here.Em……wehavearrivedinWhiteTigerMountain!AhIcan’twalkonanymore!(坐)Mystomachdoesn’tallowSo.S:FatPig!E:Monkey,ifyoudaretosaythesetwowordsonceagain,Iwill，Iwill……….S:Youwillwhat(兇相)?E:(軟禁)Iwillhelpyoucatchfleas(跳蚤).S:Hm!T:（輕咳）Wukong,factually,IamabithungryCouldyougotogetmesomefood?E:Yousee,masterishungry,too!T:Baijie!Don’tforgetwhoatemylastmeal!J:Butmaster,ifamonstercomeswhilebrothermonkegisaway…..T:Em…….Itisaproblem.Wukong,doyouhaveanyidea?S:Noproblem!(安裝)（B已躲在一旁偷看）E:Thisis…..?S:Electricnet!Ihavelearnttheenergyofelectricityfrommaster’sbooks.SoImadethis.Nomonstercanapproachyouifyoustayinit!T:Em……Wukong,youarebecomingmoreandmorescientific!Emitofo,knowledgeispower!S:Bye!(走)T:Let’splaycards!(三人開始打牌)音樂《斗地主》B:Hm!Hm!Electricnet?Youaretoochildish.(變成B1)B1:(接近三人，望著)CanIjoinyou?T:I’msorry,lady.WeareplayingFightingAgainstLandlordandthreepeopleareenough.B1:(在一旁觀看)Oh,Chance!Bomb!T:Bomb?(打出)B1:DoubleKing!T:Oh….Iwin!Em……,Lady,youareamaster-hand.Comeinandteachme!(準備開電網(wǎng)門)S:(回來，看見B1)Oh,monster!(上前就打)B1:（倒)Ah……T:(氣憤)Wukong!Lookwhathavedone!Sheismyteacher!S:Sheisamonster!T:Nonsense!(深呼吸)S:Oh,pleasedon’t……T:It’stoolate!(唱)Oncemore……youopenthedoor…(泰坦尼克主題曲，走音離譜)S:Please,Please,oh,no……(痛苦抱頭)T:(嗆住，咳)Wukong,I’mdisappointedwithyou!B:(真身出現(xiàn))Hm!SunWukong,I’llteachyoualesson!(變成太婆)B2:Hello,haveyouseenmydaughter?T:Daughter?...(連忙擋住地尸體)No,sorry!(陪笑，B2想看后面是什么，T擋)S:（咬牙切齒）Youmonster,I’llbeatyouintohell!(S追打B2,B2躲至T身后，S打，不想打到T頭，T暈，S再打死B2)E&J:AreyouOk,master?(扶T)J:Look,(伸食指)howmany?T:Two…..(暈乎乎地)SunWukong,gameover!(變成B3)B3:(看到B1,B2尸體)Oh….,mydaughter,mywife!Whodidit?！(哭喊)S:I’llkillyou,monster!(打)T:（想阻止，未及）You,you.....(險些暈，E,J扶住)Youhavekilledthreelives!S:No,theyarenothumanbeings!Theyarecreatedbymonster!T:Monster?Youarearealmonster!Neverletmeseeyou,go！S:(悲，離去)（音樂，營造“假”悲傷氣氛）《人鬼情未了》E:Master,brotherMonkeyis.......T:Scratch!Don'tmentionthatguyanymore!B:(出現(xiàn))Ha,ha,ha!(三尸體B1,B2,B3在B招手后“飄”走)T:（驚）Youare......B:Howfoolishyouare,MrTang!(E,J去阻斗，被擊退)B:(抓住T)I'llenjoyyourmeatandblood,ha,ha......S:(悄悄走到B后，打B,B暈)Athousandyearslater.T:Wukong?E:Oh,BrotherMonkey!J:Ourheroisback!T:I,Ican'tunderstand......Whathappened?S:Master,yourIQneedsincreasing!Thismonsterchangeditsappearanceintothreeshapesinordertocheatyou!T:How,howdidyoufindout?S:(沉默).......Monkey'sintuition(直覺)N:Excuseme,whereisthecniminal?S;Ah......youaretoolate,Nezha!(對T)I'vecalledthepolice.N:(搖醒B)Youareunderarrest.(出示證件)YouhavetherighttoremainsilentIfyougiveuptheright,anythingyouwillsaycanandwillbeagainstyouinacourtoflaw!(帶走B)T:Wukong(S不理T)Iadmitmymistakethistime(S仍不理)I'msorry(小聲)S:What?T:I'msorry.S:Em?Louder,please?T:I......am......sorry.....(S捂耳)（音樂響）《敢問路在何方》（這個放伴奏）T:Let'sgoguys!(歌)S:Youarecarryingtheluggage,Iamleadingthehorse.E:Saygoodbyetothesun,Welcomeeveningglow.J:Sleepingontheground,againwesetoutsetout,againwesetout.T.S.E.J:Ah......Ah......Sleepingonthegroundagainwesetout.T:Oneaftertheothertheseasonsgoby,andoheaftertheother,theyeargoon.Youwonderwheretheroadis.Theroadisunderyourfeet.T.S.E.J:Youuonderwheretheroadis,theroadisunderyourfeet......第五篇：三打白骨精話劇劇本三打白骨精話劇劇本T:唐僧(A)S:孫悟空(B)E:豬八戒(C)J:沙僧(D)B:白骨精(E)B1:B變成村姑B2:B變成太婆B3:B變化成老頭T:Emitofo,doyouknowwherewearenow?阿彌陀佛，我們這是到哪了？S:Bajie,map!八戒，地圖！E:(摸出，遞給S)S:Look,boss(湊近T)???（T、S一齊轉向E）師傅，請看。T:Bajie!HowManytimesIhavetoldyou,don’tbringthesepicturesofbeautifulgirls!八戒，我跟你講了多少次了，不要帶這種美女的圖片！E:Oh,boss!Forgiveme。(伸手拿回)哦，師傅！原諒我吧。T:(縮手)I’llkeepitforyouuntilwereachthewest為師先替你保管，到西天了再給你。E:But??但是??T:Emitofo,nothingislust,lustisnothing!Map?阿彌陀佛，色即是空，空即是色！地圖？E:(遞)Here.Em??wehavearrivedinWhiteTigerMountain!AhIcan’twalkonanymore!(坐)Mystomachdoesn’tallowSo.給，嗯??我們已經(jīng)到白虎山了！哎呀，我走不動了！再說，我這肚子也餓了。S:FatPig!肥豬!E:Monkey,ifyoudaretosaythesetwowordsonceagain,Iwill,Iwill???.死猴子，有本事再說一遍，再說??S:Youwillwhat(兇相)?再說你怎么樣？S:Noproblem!(安裝)（B已躲在一旁偷看）沒問題?。ò坠蔷阍谝慌酝悼矗㎎:Thisis?..?S:Electricnet!Imadethis.Nomonstercanapproachyouifyoustayinit!伏魔圈！只要待在里面，就沒有妖怪能接近！T:Em??ok，wewillstayinit!嗯??好的，我們會呆在里面的！S:Bye!(飛走)俺老孫去也。T:Let’splaycards!(三人開始打牌)音樂《斗地主》我們斗地主吧！B:Hm!Hm!Electricnet?Youaretoochildish.(變成B1)哈哈！伏魔圈？太小兒科了吧。B1:(接近三人，望著)CanIjoinyou?我也可以玩嗎？J:I’msorry,lady.WeareplayingFightingAgainstlandownerandthreepeopleareenough.不好意思，姑娘。我們在斗地主，三個