新高考讀后續(xù)寫高分素材-微技能之細(xì)節(jié)描寫

1、精選優(yōu)質(zhì)文檔-傾情為你奉上精選優(yōu)質(zhì)文檔-傾情為你奉上專心-專注-專業(yè)專心-專注-專業(yè)精選優(yōu)質(zhì)文檔-傾情為你奉上專心-專注-專業(yè)新高考讀后續(xù)寫高分素材 - 微技能之細(xì)節(jié)描寫讀后續(xù)寫 微技能之細(xì)節(jié)描寫 1高考中續(xù)寫的文體主要為記敘文。顧名思義，記敘文主要以記敘事件為主，因此需要用到許多的細(xì)節(jié)描寫以使文章生動(dòng)， 言之有物。不少學(xué)生語言功底不錯(cuò)，但是續(xù)寫始終得不了高分，其中一個(gè)原因可能就是細(xì)節(jié)描寫的缺乏。那么，續(xù)寫該如何寫呢？我們應(yīng)該做到兼顧概括描述和細(xì)節(jié)描述，而且要多用細(xì)節(jié)描述。所謂概括描述是指對(duì)一個(gè)事件的總體描述，而細(xì)節(jié)描述則是對(duì)事件的具體描述，來對(duì)之前的總體描述進(jìn)一步解釋說明，這樣能夠使得描述更

2、加生動(dòng)，有畫面感。舉例：如表達(dá)一個(gè)人的疲累時(shí)，可用概括描述： she felt exhausted. 同時(shí)輔以細(xì)節(jié)描述 She feltexhausted and sat by the stream, resting her aching feet.如果大家注意這些細(xì)節(jié)的描述，一定會(huì)為你的記敘文續(xù)寫增色！“感到害怕”的細(xì)節(jié)描述當(dāng)看到那只兇惡的狼時(shí)，我感到很害怕。1、大家可以先嘗試用概括描述，先將意思表達(dá)清楚。_2、請(qǐng)你在此概括描述的基礎(chǔ)上增加細(xì)節(jié)描述，注意邏輯關(guān)系以及語意的合理。1） _2） _3） _參考答案：At the sight of the ferocious wolf, I fel

3、t very scared. 1）At the sight of the ferocious wolf, I felt so scared that my throat tightened and my kneesfelt weak. (嗓子發(fā)緊，膝蓋發(fā)軟 )2）At the sight of the ferocious wolf, I froze with terror, too scared to move an inch .(嚇呆了，不敢動(dòng)彈 )3）At the sight of the ferocious wolf, I was seized by a strong sense of

4、horror and my palmswere sweating. (被深深地恐懼感所控制，手心出汗 )表感到興奮 thrilled當(dāng)主持人宣布她獲獎(jiǎng)時(shí)，她興奮極了。11、大家可以先嘗試用概括描述，先將意思表達(dá)清楚。_2、請(qǐng)你在此概括描述的基礎(chǔ)上增加細(xì)節(jié)描述，注意邏輯關(guān)系以及語意的合理。1） _2） _3） _參考答案：When the host announced that she won the prize, she felt thrilled. 1) When the host announced that she won the prize, her eyes twinkled wit

5、h excitement. （激動(dòng)得兩眼放光）2) When the host announced that she won the prize, her heart was thumping withexcitement. (激動(dòng)得心砰砰跳 )3) When the host announced that she won the prize, a wide excitement took hold of her. (興奮不能自已 )感到悲傷 一聽到那個(gè)壞消息，她悲傷不已。1、大家可以先嘗試用概括描述，先將意思表達(dá)清楚。_2、請(qǐng)你在此概括描述的基礎(chǔ)上增加細(xì)節(jié)描述，注意邏輯關(guān)系以及語意的合理。1

6、） _2） _3） _參考答案： Upon hearing the bad news, she felt extremely sad. 1）Upon hearing the bad news, her heart ached, tears streaming down her cheeks. (心痛，眼淚直流 )2）Upon hearing the bad news, she, numb with grief, had trouble speaking. (悲傷到失去知覺，不能開口說話 )3Upon hearing the bad news, she felt seized by a burs

7、t of sadness and couldn t help cryingbitterly. (被一股悲傷之感控制，忍不住哭泣 ) 當(dāng)媽媽親吻他時(shí)，小 baby 開心極了。1、大家可以先嘗試用概括描述，先將意思表達(dá)清楚。_22、請(qǐng)你在此概括描述的基礎(chǔ)上增加細(xì)節(jié)描述，注意邏輯關(guān)系以及語意的合理。1） _2） _3） _參考答案：When his mother kissed him on the cheek, the baby was happy/delighted/full of joy.) When his mother kissed him on the cheek, it seemed a

8、s if the baby were on top of theworld. (非常開心 )2) When the mother kissed the baby on the cheek, his face beamed and his bright smile litup the room. (眉開眼笑；笑容照亮房間 )3) When the mother kissed the baby on the cheek, his eyes danced with joy andsweetness. (歡欣雀躍 )感到羞愧 的細(xì)節(jié)描述她感到非常羞愧。1、大家可以先嘗試用概括描述，先將意思表達(dá)清楚。_

9、(答案見底部 Key 1)2、請(qǐng)你在此概括描述的基礎(chǔ)上增加細(xì)節(jié)描述，注意邏輯關(guān)系以及語意的合理。1）_2）_3）_(答案見底部 Key 2)參考答案：Key 1: She felt ashamed.Key 2:1) She felt so ashamed that she could feel her face burning .( 臉上滾燙 )2) So ashamed was she that she could feel the blood rush to her face . (血液涌上臉頰 )3) So ashamed did she feel that she was close

10、to tears . ( 快哭了 ) Sheldon 感到非常生氣。1、大家可以先嘗試用概括描述，先將意思表達(dá)清楚。_2、請(qǐng)你在此概括描述的基礎(chǔ)上增加細(xì)節(jié)描述，注意邏輯關(guān)系以及語意的合理。31） _2） _3） _參考答案：Key 1: Sheldon felt very angry.Key 2:1) Sheldon felt so angry that he stormed out of the room, slamming the door furiously behindhim. (沖出房間；狠狠摔門 )2) Boiling with rage , Sheldon shook his f

11、ist at me . (怒火中燒；揮舞拳頭 )3) Filled with fury , Sheldon was unable to utter a single word . (充滿憤怒；說不出話 ) Tony 感到很絕望。1、大家可以先嘗試用概括描述，先將意思表達(dá)清楚。_2、請(qǐng)你在此概括描述的基礎(chǔ)上增加細(xì)節(jié)描述，注意邏輯關(guān)系以及語意的合理。1） _2） _3） _參考答案：Key 1: Tony felt hopeless/desperate.Key 2:1) As the result of an accident, Tony was suddenly thrown into a wo

12、rld of darkness and sankinto hopelessness . (被投入黑暗之中；陷入絕望 )2) Tony felt left out and was getting desperate with loneliness. ( 感覺被遺忘、忽視 )3) Tonys beliefs in looking forward and seeing the positive in everything deserted him. 1、踉踉蹌蹌_2、悄悄地走_(dá)3、猛沖_(答案見底部 )4Keys: The player lost his balance, staggered bac

13、k and toppled over . 這個(gè)運(yùn)動(dòng)員失去了平衡，向后趔趄摔倒了。 She slipped out of bed and tiptoed to the window. 她溜下床，踮起腳尖走向窗戶。 3. Theminion made a rush for the door and escaped from the scene. 小黃人向門沖去，逃離了現(xiàn)場(chǎng)。人的說話方式”細(xì)節(jié)描述說話的方式多種多樣， 如果都用 talk 就顯得索然無味， 也不夠準(zhǔn)確， 所以要多積累各種各樣的表達(dá)。1、說長(zhǎng)道短；八卦_2、小聲咕噥_3、嚎叫_(答案見底部 )Keys: The whole compan

14、y is gossiping about the reason for his dismissal. 整個(gè)公司都在談?wù)撍幻饴毜脑颉?He murmured against the strict rules of the reality show. 他私下低聲抱怨真人秀的嚴(yán)苛規(guī)則。 Treated so unfairly, she howled in pain and anger . 被如此不公正地對(duì)待，她痛苦而又憤怒的嚎叫。細(xì)節(jié)描述之 “思考”如何表達(dá)一個(gè)人暗自思索時(shí)的樣子對(duì)學(xué)生來說是很困難的，大多數(shù)情況下，學(xué)生往往會(huì)選擇避開，但是，人無時(shí)無刻不在思考，強(qiáng)行避開會(huì)使得故事內(nèi)容上有些不銜接。

15、所以，今天我們就一起來學(xué)習(xí)一下如何表達(dá)一個(gè)人的思考神態(tài)。 得知問題所在之后，他的大腦開始急速運(yùn)轉(zhuǎn)，想要想出一個(gè)好的解決方案。_ 獨(dú)自一人時(shí)，他總是會(huì)想到那可怕的經(jīng)歷。_ 在他洗澡時(shí)，突然想到了一個(gè)好主意。_(答案見底部 )Keys:5 After he knew what the problem was, his mind began to race , trying to think ofa good solution. ( 大腦飛速運(yùn)轉(zhuǎn) ) alone, he would always be haunted by that horrible experience. ( 不好的回憶 縈繞心頭

16、揮之不去 ) When he was taking a shower, a brilliant idea suddenly crossed his mind. ( 突然閃過某人的腦海 )細(xì)節(jié)描述之 “describe a peaceful scene ”今天，我們來看看該如何描述安靜祥和的場(chǎng)景。 享受陽光_ 山間有小屋和田地_ 入暮時(shí)分，蘆葦隨風(fēng)飄揚(yáng)_(答案見底部 )Keys: When I was bathed in the sunlight, it felt like the amber-like sunshine waskissing every inch of my skin . (

17、沐浴在陽光下；琥珀色的陽光親吻著全身的肌膚 ) Mist-covered mountains were dotted with small farms and villages. ( 點(diǎn)綴著) The sound of my footsteps was accompanied only by the gracefully wavingreeds. ( 優(yōu)雅地隨風(fēng)飄揚(yáng)的蘆葦 )細(xì)節(jié)描述之 “describe stormy weather ”今天，我們來看看該如何描述風(fēng)雨交加的天氣。 烏云密布_ 勁風(fēng)惡浪肆虐_ 暴雨疾風(fēng)_(答案見底部 )Keys: The sky is overcast , da

18、rkened with gloomy clouds .(烏云密布；黑云壓頂 ) On that dark and stormy night, the waves were crashing and the winds were howling . (海浪肆意拍打；勁風(fēng)咆哮 )6 The rain came pouring down , the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against thehouse. ( 暴風(fēng)驟雨 )讀后續(xù)寫對(duì)話中的常見誤區(qū)1 廢話連篇，無助推動(dòng)情節(jié)發(fā)展，刻畫人物性格。“Hey, how are ” “Imfine,

19、 how are ”“ the weather?” “Terrific ! Nice day for a walk, isn t it? ”評(píng)析：這樣的對(duì)話在現(xiàn)實(shí)生活中很真實(shí)，但是小說畢竟是藝術(shù)加工，無助情節(jié)推動(dòng)的，不能刻畫人物性格的日常寒暄和偏離文章主線的對(duì)話絕對(duì)不用。2 追求花哨，過度使用對(duì)話標(biāo)簽 dialogue tags“That is fantastic news,”he said happily.評(píng)析：此句中完全沒有必要加上一個(gè) happily 來表達(dá)說的方式，因?yàn)榫渲械?fantastic 一詞足以說明說話人了表情，過度強(qiáng)調(diào) dialogue tags 會(huì)讓讀者的注意力集中在“說

20、話的方式”而不是“說話的內(nèi)容”。建議改為：“ That is fantastic news ！”he said/screamed/exclaimed. ( 一個(gè)感嘆號(hào)和一個(gè)fantastic 已經(jīng)足以讓讀者想象當(dāng)時(shí)的情景。適當(dāng)?shù)摹八囆g(shù)留白”也是需要的，這樣會(huì)留給讀者想象的空間。還有一種避免過度的 dialogue tags 的方法是運(yùn)用“動(dòng)作描寫”來取而代之。如：Her eyes reflected the candlelight as she smiled at her son. “Everyone is unique.Just follow your heart and be yourse

21、lf! ”3 用詞不當(dāng)，錯(cuò)誤使用對(duì)話標(biāo)簽 dialogue tagsI cant believe it, Emma gasped.Thats hilarious, Henry chuckled.評(píng)析：以上兩句話也是我在大量的學(xué)生習(xí)作甚至是范文中發(fā)現(xiàn)的。這里 把動(dòng)作描寫和dialogue tags 混淆了，試想誰能 gasp（喘息）、chuckle （輕笑）出一句話？除非他或她有特異功能。糾正方法如下：I cant believe it , Emma said with a gasp.（Question tag+ with 介詞短語）Emma I cant believe it.（動(dòng)作描寫句號(hào)）

22、7I cant believe it . Emma gasped.（對(duì)話句斷動(dòng)作描寫）Thats hilarious ! Henry chuckled.（感嘆句結(jié)束 動(dòng)作描寫）Thats hilarious , Henry said, chuckling.（Question tag+ 分詞做伴隨狀況）請(qǐng)?zhí)貏e關(guān)注以上 對(duì)話的標(biāo)點(diǎn)。4 多此一舉，對(duì)話對(duì)象十分明確，仍使用對(duì)話標(biāo)簽“I told you already, ”I said, glaring.評(píng)析：此句貌似豪華，其實(shí) 對(duì)話中的主語“ I”已經(jīng)清晰地說明了說話者，完全沒有必要用question tag “I said ” 來說明說話對(duì)象 。

23、糾正方法：加上一點(diǎn)動(dòng)作描寫就可以避免這種錯(cuò)誤，并且提升語言的生動(dòng)性 。I glared at him. “Itold you already. ”5 頻用副詞，詞匯貧乏 只會(huì)tell 不會(huì)show“How can you do this ？”she said angrily ，looking at me furiously.評(píng)析：此句也是貌似“高大上”，使用了大量副詞，并且套用了分詞做伴隨的句型。 任何方面都有度，過之而不及。過度堆砌辭藻會(huì)讓人生厭，過度使用副詞也會(huì)讓閱卷老師覺得你詞匯貧乏，非得用副詞才能表達(dá)出來。2 大糾正辦法：1）積累相關(guān)的 show 的詞匯來避免過度使用副詞2）穿插動(dòng)作描

24、寫輔助對(duì)話，刻畫人物心情試比較以下兩句：“Thatsnot what you said yesterday, ” she said, her voice implying she waswithdrawing.“Thatsnot what you said yesterday. ” She hesitated, turned and walked to thewindow.評(píng)析：兩句話粗看都是相當(dāng)不錯(cuò)。無論從詞匯和語法結(jié)構(gòu)的使用似乎都屬于上乘之作。 但細(xì)細(xì)琢磨下面這句反而更高一籌。原因是，第一句用了 imply 和withdraw 兩詞來tell 說話者she 的心情，而第二句 hesitat

25、e 和后面的動(dòng)作描寫讓她的猶豫心情躍然紙上。 小說故事要的就是這種 show的方式。分析對(duì)話實(shí)例，揭示對(duì)話秘訣Example 1原文內(nèi)容：作者爸爸在陽臺(tái)種植康乃馨，悉心呵護(hù)，作者一家都非常喜歡這些花。爸媽再三8強(qiáng)調(diào)不允許作者和他姐姐不能觸碰這些花。To our surprise, Dad was mad about it, yelling at us, “Dont you know touchingis not allowed? What on earth ha ve you done? ”賞析：反義疑問句和 on earth 的使用加強(qiáng)了語氣，凸顯了父親的生氣。Example 2原文內(nèi)容：母

26、親去世，哥哥外出。父女相約吃飯， 引發(fā)了女兒對(duì)母親和哥哥的思念，父親讀懂了女兒內(nèi)心的想法，安慰女兒。母親在天堂一定希望他們過得快樂，現(xiàn)在他們需要做的就是珍惜身邊的人。Seeing this, my father lovingly held my hands and said to me , “Sweetheart, Ibelieve your mother must want you to live happily, so say goodbye to the past andembrace the present. Your brother and I will always be with

27、 you. ”賞析：情感類的對(duì)話要求感人，觸及內(nèi)心，這點(diǎn)此對(duì)話做的不錯(cuò)。但是小編也要對(duì)此對(duì)話提出點(diǎn)意見 ）文中的 andsaid to me完全沒有必要，因?yàn)閷?duì)話對(duì)象非常清楚，肯定和我說。）your mother 顯得太疏遠(yuǎn)，親人間相互稱呼用 即可，更顯真實(shí)，貼近生活。Example 3原文內(nèi)容：作者家突然停電，雖然弟弟覺得停電時(shí)間非常無聊，但是作者卻非常享受停電時(shí)間，享受“沒有現(xiàn)代電子科技帶來的干擾”的寧靜片刻。Bzzz! The lights return. “Yeah, no morecandles! ”Mymother yells, pulling meawayfrom my fant

28、asy.賞析：對(duì)話簡(jiǎn)潔自然，表達(dá)了說話者恢復(fù)用電時(shí)候的興奮，對(duì)話外面的 dialogue tag 也很出色，分詞的使用既豐富了語言也推動(dòng)了情節(jié)的進(jìn)一步發(fā)展。Exa l e 4原文內(nèi)容 ：主人 公 Jenny 通過自 身的勞動(dòng) 獲得了心 愛的項(xiàng)鏈 ，形影不離。父親每日給她講 睡前故事。父親 故意試探 女兒，問是否 可以把項(xiàng)鏈給他。Jenny 深愛爸爸但不舍自 己努力得來的項(xiàng)鏈。A w eek l at er , h er f at her o nce a gai n a sked J enny a f t er h er s t or y. “ J enny,you l ove me, d on

29、 t y ou? G i ve me y our p ear l s, o k ay? “ D addy, why must y ouask f or t he p ear l s?” J enny r ef used a gai n. “ N ot o nl y d i d I f i ni sh a l lt hose c hor es, b ut a l so I s pent t he d ol l ar b i l l g i ven f or my b i r t hday j ustt o pay f or i t. ” They bot h f el l i nt o si l

30、 ence. Then her f at her s l ed，co or t i ng h er w i t h a w ar mh ug. “ T hat s o key, d ar l i ng. G ood ni ght. ”Sever al days l at er , when Jenny s f at her ca i n t o r ead her a st or y as usual ,he w as s ur pr i sed t o f i nd s o t hi ng u nder t he s t or y b ook, w hi ch t ur ned o utt

31、o b e t he n eckl ac e. “ Daddy, n ow y ou c an h ave i t. ” J enny r ai sed h er h ead,9“ Y ou k now, I l ove y ou. ” H er f at her w as m oved b eyond w or ds. S l owl y, h epul l ed somet hi ng out of hi s pocket. I t was a pr et t y neckl ace wi t h r eal pear l sshi ni ng. “ The r e you ar e wi

32、 l l i ng t o gi ve, t he r e y ou ar e l i kel y t or ecei ve. That s t he r eal ani ng of shar i ng and gi vi ng. ” Her f at her hel pedJenny put on t he neckl ace . “ You kno I l ove you, l i t t l e one. ” ：此 文 運(yùn) 用 了 大 量 的 主 要 是 考到 與 前 文 的同 。 大 量 的 父 女的 對(duì) 插 一 些 旁 白 或作 描 寫 很 好 地 刻 畫 了 人 物 之的 沖 突

33、，地 刻 畫 了 人 物心 情 。一 般 的后寫 不 建用 太 多 的 當(dāng) 的 以 打 破情，刻 畫 人 物 性 格 。于 此 文 中 的 小也 想 提 出 點(diǎn) 個(gè) 人 的 意： 1） “ Not o nl ydi d I f i ni sh a l l t hose c hor es, b ut a l so I s pent t he d ol l ar b i l l g i ven f or b i r t hday j ust t o p ay f or i t. ” 此 句 似 乎了 使 用 not o nl y , b ut a l so 的倒 裝 句 型 而 寫得 很 不 自

34、然 。句 太反 而 不 能 表 達(dá) 小 女 孩 當(dāng)?shù)?生 氣 。建: “ I t s mi ne! M y e f f or t s! ” 反 而得 然 ， 同達(dá) 到 了 效 果 ，符 合 人 在 生 氣候 的 式 ：短 句 ！不 完 整 句 ！2）有 一 的 使 用 也 有。 ： Jenny r ai sed h er h ead, 此的 逗 號(hào) 要 改句 號(hào) 。 只 能 作 描 寫 ，而 不 是 quest i on t ag。Exa l e 5原 文 內(nèi) 容 ：是 一 個(gè) 哲 理 故 事 ，述 一 位 商 人 兒 子 去 向 智 者找 快秘。 智 者人著 兩勺 油城 一 周 不 能 將

35、油 灑 落 者 待 年人 回 來 后他 是 否 欣 賞到 城 堡 的 美 景 ， 年人口 無 言 。 然 后 智 者 重 新人著 兩 勺 油城 一 周 ， “ But wher e ar e t he t wo dr ops of oi l I gave you?” as ked t he s e n. ar r assed a gai n, t he y oung m an a pol ogi zed, “ I h ad f or got t en t hesp t ot al l y. M y o nl y c oncer n w as t he at t r act i ve s i g

36、ht s. ” “ B ut y ou h avegot t he happi ness. ” l ed t he wi se man“ B ut wher e a r e t he t wo d r ops o f o i l I g ave y ou?” a sked t he w i se man. Hel ower ed hi s head and f ound t hat t her e s not hi ng l ef t i n hi s s poon,ast oni shed and e ar r assed. Then t he wi se n s l ed gener ou

37、sl y , “ I don tbl a y ou. I j ust want y ou t o r eal i ze t he s ecret o f h appi ness y our sel f. Nocoul d y ou t el l me a bout y our t hought s?” T he y oung m an t hought f or a whi l eand s l o y r epl i ed, “ t he t r ut h o f h appi ness i s h ol di ng o ur d r ea t i ght l ybut never f ai

38、 l i ng t o wat ch t he beaut i f ul scener y ar ound us. ” ：此 文 的 要 是 用 來 揭 示 故 事 的 寓 意 ， 通 常 出在 故 事 的 末 尾 。對(duì)一 定 要 寫 出 深 度 厚 度 ， 才 能 博 得 老的 高 分 。 建可 以 使 用 。 此 文 中 也10有一個(gè)標(biāo) 點(diǎn)瑕疵。請(qǐng)看： Then t he w i se m an s l ed g ener ousl y, 此 句的逗號(hào) 也要改為句 號(hào)， 作為動(dòng)作描寫穿 插其中，而不是 quest i on t ag 。他山石可攻玉 |這些 一篇出自美國初中生的看圖說話與2

39、018 年6 月浙江英語高考“讀后續(xù)寫”酷似！Write a short story based on the pictures below in not less than 100 words.One weekend, my parents decided to bring my brother and I to the recreational jungle. Wewere very excited as we had not been there before. My brother and I talked about all thebears, tigers and reindeer

40、 we were going to see. We really thought that a recreational junglewas like any other jungle.When we arrived, we dashed into the jungle, wanting to explore its length and breadth .We obediently followed our parents at first but found it boring. Just then, a rabbit rushedout. I ed in delight and ran

41、after it. My brotherfollowedquickly behind. We keptrunning, always keeping our eyes on the rabbit. The rabbit got tired of running and decidedto hide in its burrow .It was only then that we realized that we did not know where we were. The trees lookedunfamiliar and there were no more jungle paths fo

42、r us to follow. We werescaredas werealized that we were lost. Night was approaching and the hooting of the owl sent shiversdown our spines. I began to cry as I was feeling tired, hungry and sleepy. My brothercomforted me by letting me sleep on his lap. I soon fell asleep dreaming of bears waiting to

43、eat me up.Suddenly, I woke up. My brother was shaking me and telling them to get up. We could hearvoices coming our way! We edwith all our might that we were lost. We soonsaw beams of light from countless torches. Then we heard our parents voices. We were safe!My brother and I ran to our parents and

44、 embraced them emotionally. We were so happy tosee them again that we vowed we never wanted to be separated from them ever again.：burrow : a hole in the ground dug by an animal such as a rabbit, especially to live insend shivers down sbs to make someone feel very frightenedvow: to make a determined

45、decisionStudy the following the following examples and learn how to showosfear11Example 1 - Fear:M i d n i g h t , a n d s o m eo n e p o u n d e d o n t h e f ro n t d o o r. M o m ? D ad ? W h e rew e re t h ey ? Th e m o v i e g o t o u t at 1 1. M o ll y c raw le d o u t o f b ed an dt i p t o e

46、 d d o w n st air s. A s h ad o w y f i g u re s h o w ed th r o u gh t h e f r o ste d g la ssin th e f r o n t d o or. Fea r n ib b l ed at h er m a k in g h e r k n ees w o b b le.M o m s v o ic e e c h o ed i n sid e h er h e ad. Rem e m b e r, d o n t a n sw e r t h e d o o rw h en w e r e a w

47、a y. M o lly c ro u ch e d , b a ck p r essed a g a in st t he w all , m o u thd ry - as-d ir t. Pl ea se, g o aw ay , h er w o rd s a c ho k e d w h isp er.Key Words - pounded, crawled, tiptoed, shadowy, fear nibbled, wobble,echoed, crouched, pressed, dry-as-dirt, choked.Comments ：1）例 1 中大量運(yùn)用了短句，戲劇

48、性的短句能夠增強(qiáng)緊張感2）這些關(guān)鍵字大部分都是強(qiáng)有力且活躍動(dòng)詞。3）簡(jiǎn)短的 dialogue 有效推動(dòng)了情節(jié)發(fā)展，營造了栩栩如生的恐懼的場(chǎng)景。Its Your turn:Example 2 - Fear:I can feel the sweat drench my skin, the throbbing of my own eyes, the ringingscreams vibrating in my ears, and the thumping of my heart against my chest.My fingers are curled into a fist, nails dig

49、ging into my palm. I cant hear myrapid breathing, but I can feel the oxygen flooding in and out of my lungs.Hesitantly, my eyes look at the dead corpse before me, the person I killed. Feartortures my guts, churning my stomach in tense cramps. Fear engulfs myconscience, knocking all other thoughts as

50、ide. Fear overwhelms my body,making it drastically exhausted. However, most of all, the fear is making mecalm and that is what scares me the most.Key words ：_Your treasure:_Example 3 - FearTime passed slowly. Cathy stayed hidden within the darkness, feeling everybeat of her heart pounding on the col

51、d stone she lay upon. The wine and ale12cellar was as quiet as it was dark, with only one sound to be heard; the soundof her own pulse throbbing in her ears. Suddenly, the serenity of silencesurrendered to the deathly scream of hinges, as the door opposite her wasslowly pried open. A narrow stream o

52、f light gracefully meandered through theroom, and a shadow quickly followed.She was scared.Cathy held her breathe, daring not to make a sound. Each second seemed tolast an eternity as she lay perfectly still listening to the footsteps of the intruder,which had muted the pounding of her pulse.Key wor

53、ds ：_Your treasure:_ _恐懼來自自身，最大的恐懼其實(shí)就是恐懼本身！讀后續(xù)寫微技能 如何讓你筆下的對(duì)話更加準(zhǔn)確傳神對(duì)話（ dialogue）是故事角色在整個(gè)故事中對(duì)彼此或?qū)ψ约赫f的話。它可以用來揭示人物的性格和個(gè)性，它也可以用來推動(dòng)情節(jié)向前發(fā)展，并展示情節(jié)發(fā)展的過程。對(duì)話是故事中最重要的元素之一。對(duì)話的語言要避免冗長(zhǎng)的敘述，要避免直接告訴讀者而要通過其他手段來展示它們。優(yōu)秀的對(duì)話會(huì)讓你故事中的人物生動(dòng)立體，栩栩如生，將推動(dòng)你的故事進(jìn)展，使其更有樂趣，而拙劣的對(duì)話將破壞一個(gè)好的故事。11. 如何準(zhǔn)確使用對(duì)話中的標(biāo)點(diǎn)請(qǐng)觀察下面的句子。Jack asked, “Do you thi

54、nk it will rain today? ”“I have a new umbrella, explained Emily, “and I am excited to try it out. ”“Why dont you check the weather forecast on your phone? suggested arly.“It is as simple as the smile on your face, ”he said.先看一個(gè)如何使用標(biāo)點(diǎn)的視頻英語對(duì)話標(biāo)點(diǎn)使用規(guī)則：第一、對(duì)話提示詞（Dialogue tags）Jack asked,”/“explained Emily,

55、 ”/“suggested Carly, 第二、 對(duì)話中的逗號(hào)，永遠(yuǎn)在引號(hào)里面。對(duì)話提示詞 個(gè)句子的框架，它和它引用的部分是一個(gè)整體，是完整的一個(gè)句子。這就13解釋了很多老師的疑惑，為啥對(duì)話有時(shí)候引用的對(duì)話說完了，但是后面卻用逗號(hào)。如：“It was as hard as a rock, ”he aid.： He said，“It was as hard as a rock. ”第三、 整個(gè)對(duì)話（引用部分 +對(duì)話提示詞）完整的時(shí)候，才能使用句號(hào)。對(duì)話開始首字母大寫。如果對(duì)話提示詞是插在一個(gè)完整對(duì)話中間的， 后面需要用逗號(hào)。且后半句話開頭首字母要小寫。如：“I have a new umbrel

56、la, explained Emily, “and I am excited to try it out. ”Exercise 1：給下面的句子加標(biāo)點(diǎn) Theres a fifty percent chance of rain this afternoon, reported Emily. Emily asked, Do you think I should take my new umbrella to school? Of course you should take it to school, answered Jack. If it starts raining, Carly adde

57、d, you will be nice and dry. Emily squealed( 尖叫), I see dark gray storm clouds rolling in. Oh no! exclaimed ( 驚叫)Jack. Carly and I dont have umbrellas. Hooray! yelled （喊叫） Emily. Its finally raining. Carly mumbled （咕噥地說） , My hair is getting soaked. Would you and Jack like to share my umbrella with

58、me? asked Emily. Thank you Emily, said Carly. Youre more than just a fair weather friend.2 如何讓你的對(duì)話不平庸對(duì)話的關(guān)注點(diǎn) 就是故事中的角色1）對(duì)誰說了什么話2）說話的同時(shí)在做什么3）如何說的例1A: Give me the money, Katherine said.B: Give me the money,Katherine said, eyes staring at the money on the table。在高考讀后續(xù)寫的實(shí)際操作中，我們更加鐘愛 B 這種句式，既表明了說話對(duì)象，又描述了說話

59、的方式，讓讀者更有畫面感。例2Give me that toy gun , Tom said angrily.Lucy grinned, hiding it behind her back.這組對(duì)話中的 said angrily 的使用讓整個(gè)對(duì)話表現(xiàn)平庸。 改變這種現(xiàn)狀的辦法有兩種14I. 換直接告的詞 （said angrily 詞（如：shouted/ screamed/ barked ）請(qǐng)看下面頻II 在上下文語境確的情況下，通過動(dòng)作和神態(tài)描寫來代替枯燥 sb.said 話提 示語 )。 這樣處理的處是： 1）增加表現(xiàn)力生動(dòng)性 2）避免打斷對(duì)話的語。如：Tom slammed the d

60、oll on the ground and glared at Lucy，Give me the toy.Lucy ，hiding it behind her back.提示： 在讀后續(xù)寫的創(chuàng)作中， 盡量少用副詞 來表述說話人講話方式（為你用了副詞那就是 tell 而不是 show）,特別是你要主要渲染的景 .讓你的對(duì)話有趣真有畫面立體感的是你如何使用 show 的技能， 那就一定要使用一些描繪性的動(dòng)詞。（他們說了什么話，說話時(shí)同時(shí)在做什么，拙劣表達(dá)：Im going to the store,Sydneyannounced happily. Wanna go with me?上面這個(gè)例子中