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讀后續(xù)寫指導(dǎo):5R解讀、4句框架和3大原則(五四三法)題目:讀下面材料,根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)續(xù)寫兩端,使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。
Mikelickedthelastofthemintchocolatechip
icecream.Itwasalmosttimetoleave.Hejumpedintothecarwithhis
parents
andheadedofftotheOlympic-sized
pool
forthebigswimmeet.
Whenhis
race
cameup,Mikewasconfident.Hewasstrongandswift.Mikeclimbedoutthepool,smiling.Hehadjust
won
firstplace,makinghimthefastestboyinhisagegroup.
"Congratulations,son,"hisfathersaid.Hismomgavehimahug,eventhoughhewassoakingwet.
Aweeklater,itwastimeforanotherswimmeet.Likebefore,Mikedecidedtoenjoyhisfavoriteicecreamflavor.Mikerememberedthatthelasttimehehadwonarace,healsoatemintchocolatechipicecreamfirst.Maybehe'dwinagain.
He’staken
firstplace
againinhisrace.Mikewasfeelingprettygood.Asitturnedout,MikedecidedtohavesomemintchocolatechipIcecreambeforeeveryoneofthenextfewswimmeets.Hebegantothinkofitashis
luckycharm.Afterseveralmonthsofplacinginthetoppositionsofeveryraceheswam,Mikewasfeelingunbeatable.Andhewouldn’tadmitit,butallthaticecreamwasaddingafewpoundstohisathleticswimmer'sbuild.
Itdidn’ttakelongafterthatforMiketostartcominginsecondplace-andthenthird-andthenlastplaceinhisraces.Theluckymintchocolatechipicecreamhadlostits
magic.Onthedayofhisnextswimmeet,hismothersatdownatthetablewithhim.“Mike,weallloveicecream,butit'snot
healthy
foryourbodytoeatsomuchofit.Maybeit'stimetoquitthesweettreatsforawhile,especiallybeforeyougoswimming.
Mikeunwillinglyagreed.Hewenttotheswimmeet,anddidn’t
perform
well.Hisfatherofferedtogorunningwithhimafewdaysaweektohelphimfeelbetterandstrengthenhismuscles.Theextraweightsoondisappeared,andMikefoundhimselfbreathingeasieratswimpractices.
It
was
the
last
meet
of
the
season,
and
Mike
wasn’t
sure
what
to
expect.He
felt
healthyagain,but
he
didn’t
know
if
he
still
had
any
speed
in
the
pool.
As
he
drove
into
the
water,he
kicked
his
legs
and
stretched
his
arms
as
far
as
he
could.__________________________________________________________________________________________________
His
jaw
dropped
as
he
realized
he
had
beaten
his
own
best
time,and
everyone
else
too.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________第一步:5R讀文本
Analyzethestory:
5Rs
1.Readforcharacters:
Mike,hisparents,Icecream,teammates
2.Readforconflict/problems:
IcecreamandMike’sperformance:Whetherit
isaLuckycharm3.Readforplot:單擊輸入您的封面副標(biāo)題4.Readforemotionalchanges:
Whenhisracecameup,Mikewas
confident
Mikewas
feelingprettygood.
Afterseveralmonthsofplacinginthetoppositionsofeveryraceheswam,Mikewas
feelingunbeatable.
Mike
unwillingly
agreed.
5.Readfortheme
WhatcontributestoMike’ssuccessinswimming?第二步:四句定框架:
寫讀后續(xù)寫不同于寫其它作文,有可能需要先倒著寫的
Step1:
先把最后一句寫好,即:主題句
Mikerealizedthatone‘sluckycharmwasnothingbuthisdiligence.
Step2:
再把銜接句寫好,即第一段的最后一句:
Hedashedtothefinishline.
Step3:
緊接著每段的提示語(yǔ)句寫角色的情感:
Ashedoveintothewater,hekickedhislegsandstretchedhisarmsasfarashecould.
Itstruckendlessenergyandmotivationintohisbody.
Mike’sjawdroppedasherealizedhehadbeatenhisownbesttime,andeveryoneelse‘stoo.
Theflowersinhisheartwerealreadyinbloom.第三部:內(nèi)容三原則
接下來(lái)就是把每段的中間補(bǔ)充完整記住三大原則:
1.Action—Response原則:角色A的所言、所行、所感、所想會(huì)引起其它角色的一系列反應(yīng)的。每段對(duì)話1-2句,不一定兩個(gè)人都要說(shuō)話,無(wú)聲的動(dòng)作也是一種response。
2.Conflict—Solution原則:一般而言第二段會(huì)有問(wèn)題的solution,但本文和高考的讀后續(xù)寫文章出題不一樣,因?yàn)閟olution在所給文章中就已經(jīng)有了。
同時(shí)思考:能否在第一段出現(xiàn)一個(gè)問(wèn)題,然后把它解決了或者沒(méi)有解決。一方面是增加看點(diǎn),另一方面也是給第二段鋪墊。
3.Negative—Positive原則:寫作中一定要體現(xiàn)情感的變化,無(wú)論前面是這樣的變化,最終都是積極的。
Ashedoveintothewater,hekickedhislegsandstretchedhisarmsasfarashecould.
1.Itstruckendlessenergyandmotivationintohisbody.(心情)2.“ThisiswhereIbelong.Icanwintherace,”thoughthe,histeethclenchedandhiseyesfixedonthefinishlineforward.(內(nèi)心獨(dú)白)3.Suddenly,twofigureswhizzedpast,whichstartledhim.(心情變化))4.Fearingtofallbehind,hefelthisheartpoundedfranticallyandhismindwentblank.(解釋心情變化和問(wèn)題)5.Justthen,hethoughtofhissweatandhisfather’sencouragingsmile.(問(wèn)題的解決方法)6.Gradually,hisworrygavewaytohisconfidenceandthelast5minutessawhimdashtothefinishline,followedbytheendoftherace.(銜接句)
Mike’sjawdroppedasherealizedhehadbeatenhisownbesttime,andeveryoneelse’stoo.7.Theflowersinhisheartwerealreadyinbloom.
(心情變化)8.However,heknewhedeservedthehonorofchampionship.
(拓展)9.
Hisparents
cameupandgavehimahighfive,grinningfromeartoear.
(次要角色的回應(yīng))10.“Hey,whynottryyourfavoriteicecreamandcelebrate!”saidhisfathe
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