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1234書(shū)信寫(xiě)作增分點(diǎn)2345外在美:第一印象很重要!結(jié)構(gòu)美:有合理的段落層次,要點(diǎn)分明句式美:運(yùn)用得當(dāng)?shù)母呒?jí)句式結(jié)構(gòu)可以給文章增色不少詞匯美:詞匯反映你知識(shí)貯存量的多少,也是衡量英語(yǔ)水平的一個(gè)重要標(biāo)志。銜接美:使用恰當(dāng)?shù)倪B接詞使文章上下銜接自然、條理清晰。作文例析假定你是李華。你是學(xué)生會(huì)主席。你校將于5月25—30日在廣州舉行龍舟賽(DragonBoatRace)。請(qǐng)根據(jù)以下內(nèi)容給姐妹學(xué)校劍橋中學(xué)(CambridgeHighSchool)寫(xiě)一封邀請(qǐng)信。(1)寫(xiě)信目的(2)活動(dòng)時(shí)間、地點(diǎn)和意義(3)回復(fù)時(shí)間:2017年4月15日前注意:1.詞數(shù)100左右;2.可以適當(dāng)增加細(xì)節(jié),以使行文連貫;邀請(qǐng)信邀請(qǐng)信開(kāi)頭:自我介紹,開(kāi)門(mén)見(jiàn)山,說(shuō)明目的。正文:邀請(qǐng)內(nèi)容(活動(dòng)性質(zhì),地點(diǎn),時(shí)間,日期),有關(guān)要求與希望。結(jié)尾:重申對(duì)方參加的重要性,希望盡快回復(fù)。Para1:自我介紹(已經(jīng)給出)+寫(xiě)作背景+寫(xiě)作目的Para2:要點(diǎn)time/place/significancePara3:信件交際功能結(jié)尾deadlineforreply/lookforward/gratitudes相應(yīng)的解題步驟+高分策略1.審題:確定體裁、時(shí)態(tài)、人稱。2.列要點(diǎn):漏掉內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)要降低得分檔次!3.列句子:必要時(shí)適當(dāng)增加細(xì)節(jié)。4.連句成文:使用適當(dāng)?shù)倪B接詞,使行文連貫5.潤(rùn)色:盡力使用較復(fù)雜結(jié)構(gòu)或較高級(jí)詞匯;
適當(dāng)使用語(yǔ)句間的連接成分。6.檢查:避免低級(jí)錯(cuò)誤。7.謄寫(xiě):書(shū)寫(xiě)規(guī)范,卷面整潔。Twosimplesentences:1.Hedidn’tpasstheexam.2.Hisfamilyweredisappointed.Thefirstresponseistousetheconjunctions,suchas:Howtocombinethesetwosentences?Hedidn’tpasstheexam,sohisfamilyweredisappointed.Hedidn’tpasstheexam,anditmadehisfamilydisappointed.Givenseveralseconds,someadverbialclausesofcausemayappear:Hisfamilyweredisappointedbecausehehadn’tpassedtheexam.As/Becausehehadn’tpassedtheexam,hisfamilyweredisappointed.Hisfamilyweredisappointedthathehadn’tpassedtheexam.Howaboutgivingmoreseconds?1.Hedidn’tpasstheexam.2.Hisfamilyweredisappointed.BrainstormHowtocombine
conjunctionsadverbialclausesattributiveclausesnounclauses
1.Hedidn’tpasstheexam,whichmadehisfamilydisappointed.2.Thereasonwhyhisfamilyweredisappointedwasthathehadn’tpassedtheexam.1.Thathehadn’tpassedtheexammadehisfamilydisappointed.2.Itmadehisfamilydisappointedthathehadn’tpassedtheexam.3.Itwasthathehadn’tpassedtheexamthatmadehisfamilydisappointed.Anymore?SubjectclausesMorenounclauses!Hisfamilyweredisappointedatthenewsthathehadn’tpassedtheexam.Afterhisfamilylearnedthathehadn’tpassedtheexam,theyweredisappointedAfterhisfamilyweretoldthathehadn’tpassedtheexam,theyweredisappointed.ObjectclausesAppositiveclauseSometimes,clausesaretedious(冗長(zhǎng)),so,whynotrefinethem?Nothavingpassedtheexam,hemadehisfamilydisappointed.Withhimnotpassingtheexam,hisfamilyweredisappointed1.As/Becausehehadn’tpassedtheexam,hisfamilyweredisappointed.Becauseofhisnotpassingtheexam,hisfamilyweredisappointed.Usingthephrases!Havingbeentoldthathehadn’tpassedtheexam,hisfamilyweredisappointed.Afterbeingtoldthathehadn’tpassedtheexam,hisfamilyweredisappointed.Hisfamilyweredisappointedtobetoldthathehadn’tpassedtheexam.2.Afterhisfamilyweretoldthathehadn’tpassedtheexam,theyweredisappointed.Thereasonforhisfamily’sbeingdisappointedwashisnotpassingtheexam.3.Thereasonwhyhisfamilyweredisappointedwasthathehadn’tpassedtheexam.4.Thathehadn’tpassedtheexammadehisfamilydisappointed.Hisnothavingpassedtheexammadehisfamilydisappointed.Hedidn’tpasstheexam,makinghisfamilydisappointed.5.Hedidn’tpasstheexam,whichmadehisfamilydisappointed.Somestudentsdisagreedonit,whothoughtiftheysticktoexercise,theydidn’tneedtotaketonic.Andparentsusedtonictopayattentiontotheirchildren’shealth,whichwillmakethestudentsunderthepressure.what’smore,thepriceofthetonicisveryhigh.Somestudentsagreedonit,becausetheythoughtthatthesenior3studentsworkedhard,andtheyeasilyfelttired,butthetoniccouldhelpthemovercome.Besides,theyoftenhavenotimetodoexercise.Haveatry!Somestudentsdisagreedonit,whothoughtiftheysticktoexercise,theydidn’tneedtotaketonic.Andparentsusedtonictopayattentiontotheirchildren’shealth,whichwillmakethestudentsunderthepressure.what’smore,thepriceofthetonicisveryhigh.Somestudentsgavetheirdisapproval,thinkingthat
it’sunnecessary
forstudentstotaketonicaslongastheyworkoutonaregularbasis.Intheireyes,parents’caringwithtonicbroughtthemmorepressurethanhealth.Moreover,noteveryfamilycanaffordit.
Somestudentsagreedonit,becausetheythoughtthatthesenior3studentsworkedhard,andtheyeasilyfelttired,butthetoniccouldhelpthemovercome.Besides,theyoftenhavenotimetodoexercise.Otherstudents,however,wereinfavorofit,sayingthatnothingismoreimportantthanstudy,andthatdoingexercisewasawasteoftime,sotheyworkedfulldayswithoutanyrest,thusmakingthemeasilyfelttired.Asaresult,theyrelyontakingtonictorecoverthemselves.相應(yīng)的解題步驟+高分策略1.審題:確定體裁、時(shí)態(tài)、人稱。2.列要點(diǎn):漏掉內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)要降低得分檔次!3.列句子:必要時(shí)適當(dāng)增加細(xì)節(jié)。4.連句成文:使用適當(dāng)?shù)倪B接詞,使行文連貫5.潤(rùn)色:盡力使用較復(fù)雜結(jié)構(gòu)或較高級(jí)詞匯;
適當(dāng)使用語(yǔ)句間的連接成分。6.檢查:避免低級(jí)錯(cuò)誤。7.謄寫(xiě):書(shū)寫(xiě)規(guī)范,卷面整潔。已經(jīng)這樣做了,還是得不到第五檔高分?Whatcouldhavegonewrong?我們可能忽略了什么?我們的同學(xué)可能忽略了什么?連貫性coherence銜接與連貫的異同:都是為了使行文連貫。銜接主要是強(qiáng)調(diào)句子外在的結(jié)合,而連貫強(qiáng)調(diào)內(nèi)在意義的一致性。問(wèn)題之一:用錯(cuò)銜接手段
請(qǐng)看學(xué)生習(xí)作1HereIwilltellyousomethingaboutChinesestudents'lifeinwinterholiday.Weoftenhavea20-dayholidayduringwinter.ThenwewillfinishourhomeworkfirstandprepareforthecomingSpringFestival.Last,weoftenmakeaplanforthenextyearwithourfamily.Forthefirstweekorso,HavingcelebratedChinesenewyear,問(wèn)題之一:用錯(cuò)銜接手段
閱讀學(xué)生習(xí)作2,并試修改Whenitcomestothelivesofwinterholidays,letmetellyousomethingaboutChinesestudents.First,usuallywehaveabout20-dayholidays.Second,Ithinkthatduringthistime,we'llhavemanyactivities,suchascleaningthehousetopreparetheNewyear,makingdumplingstocelebratethespringfestivalandsoon.問(wèn)題之一:用錯(cuò)銜接手段
閱讀學(xué)生習(xí)作2,并試修改Whenitcomestothelivesofwinterholidays,letmetellyousomethingaboutChinesestudents.First,usuallywehaveabout20-dayholidays.Second,Ithinkthatduringthistime,we'llhavemanyactivities,suchascleaningthehousetopreparetheNewyear,makingdumplingstocelebratethespringfestivalandsoon.LetmetellyousomethingaboutthewinterholidaylifeofChinesestudents.Usuallywehaveawinterbreakofabout20days.Duringthesedays,we'll...問(wèn)題之二:思維跳躍
請(qǐng)看學(xué)生習(xí)作3Frommyperspective,thelifeofwinterholidayiswonderful.Itwilllastfor20daysorso.Duringthesedays,wewilltryourutmosttorelaxourselves.Themorewerelax,themoreenergeticwewillbe.Tobeginwith,wewilltraveltowhereverweareinterested.Inaddition,wecanwatchmovies,dosomeexercises,hangoutwithfriendsandsoon.Moreimportantly,onnoaccountcanweignorethevalueofreading.Itcanrefreshourmind.Hereareseveraloptionsofgettingrelaxed.問(wèn)題之二:思維跳躍
閱讀學(xué)生習(xí)作4,并試修改DearBill, IamwritingtotellyouthatIhavetofinishareserachaboutthewinterlifeoftheChineseandEnglishstudents.SoIneedyourhelpnow.KnowinglittleofhowEnglishstudentsspendtheirwinterholiday,Ireallyneedyourhelpnow.問(wèn)題之三:過(guò)于追求高級(jí)表達(dá)而有損連貫性
請(qǐng)看學(xué)生習(xí)作5DearBill, Sincemysurveyisbeingdone,whichisaboutwintervacationofBritishandChinesestudents,I'mwritingtoknowaboutthewayinwhichyouspendyourholiday.IamworkingonasurveyonhowChinesestudentsandEnglishstudentsspendtheirwinterholiday,andIreallyneedyourhelpnow.范例1(全文連貫流暢)DearBill,Howareyoudoing?IneedtoaccomplishasurveyaboutthewinterholidayinBritainandChina,soIamwritingtoexchangesomeinformationwithyou.
Whenitcomestothewinterholiday,weChinesestudentsallfeelexcitedaboutit,becausewecanhavealongbreakofabout20days.Duringtheholiday,manyofuswillgoonatrip,fromwhichwecannotonlybroadenourhorizonsbuthavefun.Otherswilltakepartinsomewintercamptopromotethemselvessoastohandletheirstudywellinthenextterm.
Abovearepartsofourwinterholiday,whataboutyoursinBritain?Iamlookingforwardtoyourreply.Yours,LiHua
范例2(欠缺連貫)DearBill,Howisitgoing?Recently,IamdoingaresearchaboutwintervacationsbetweenEnglishandChinesestudents.Now,I'mwritingtoseekforsomeinforma-tion.AccordingtowhatIknow,thewintervacationinChinausuallylastsforabouttwentydays.Andinordertokeepstudentsstudying,therewillbesomehomeworkthestudentsneedtodo.However,duringthewintervacation,thereisthemostimportantfestival--SpringFestival.Wewillholdmanycelebra-tionsduringthefestival.Peopleinthesedayswillgettogethertohaveabigmeal.Besides,tothechildren'shappiness,theywillgetluckymoneyfromtheadults.
Lastbutnotleast,howdotheEnglishstudentsspendtheirwinterholiday?Ican'twaittoknowit!Iamlookingforwardtoyourreply.Yours,LiHua
范例2(修改建議)DearBill,Howisitgoing?Recently,IamdoingaresearchaboutwintervacationsbetweenEnglishandChinesestudents.Now,I'mwritingtoseekforsomeinforma-tion.Accordingtomyknowledge,thewintervacationinChinausuallylastsforabouttwentydays.Longasitmayseem,therearealwayssomehomeworkassigned
byschooltokeepstudentsbusy.Chinesestudents,however,stilllovewintervacationduetoSpringFestival,duringwhichwewillholdmanycelebrations.Familememberswillgettogethertoenjoyabigmeal;tochildren'sdelight,theyw
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