讀后續(xù)寫生命之水學案 高三英語二輪專題

讀后續(xù)寫原題目：TheWaterofLifeItwasoneofthehottestdaysofthedryseason,Wehadnotseenraininalmostamonth.Thecropsweredying.Cowshadstoppedgivingmilk.Thecreeksandstreamswerelonggonebackintotheearth.Itwasadryseasonthatwouldbankruptseveralfarmersbeforeitwasthrough.Everyday,myhusbandandhisbrotherswouldgoaboutthetiringprocessoftryingtogetwatertothefarm.Ifwedidn'tseesomerainsoon,wewouldloseeverything.ItwasonthisdaythatIlearnedthetruelessonofsharingandwitnessedtheonlymiracleIhaveseenwithmyowneves.IwasinthekitchenmakinglunchformyhusbandandhisbrotherswhenIsawmysix-year-oldson,Billywalkingtowardthewoods.Hewasn'twalkingwiththeusualcarefreeabandonofayouthbutwithaseriouspurpose.couldonlyseehisback.Hewasobviouslywalkingwithagreatefforttryingtobeasstillaspossible.Minutesafterhedisappearedintothewoods,hecamerunningoutagaintowardthehouse.Iwentbacktomakesandwiches,thinkingthatwhatevertaskhehadbeendoingwascompleted.Momentslater,however,hewasonceagainwalkinginthatslowpurposefulstridetowardthewoods.Thisactivitywentonforoveranhourwalkingcarefullytothewoods,andthenrunningbacktothehouse.Finally,mycuriositygotthebestofme.Icreptoutofthehouseandfollowedhimonhisjourney.Hewascuppingbothhandsinfrontofhimashewalked,verycarefulnottospillthewaterheheld.Maybetwoorthreetablespoonswereheldinhistinyhands.Isneakedcloserashewentintothewoods.Branchesandthornsslappedhislittlefacebuthedidnottrytoavoidthem.Hehadamuchgreaterpurpose.AsIleanedintospyonhim.sawanamazingsight.Amotherdeerwithahugepairofdeerhornsappearedinfrontofhim,withababyfawn(多)lyingonthedryground.Ialmostscreamedtogethimaway.Paragraph1However,Billywalkedrightuptothem.Paragraph2witnessedthemostbeautifulheartworkinghardtosavealife主要內(nèi)容旱季最炎熱的日子里，已經(jīng)將近一個月沒下過一滴雨了。莊稼枯萎，河流干涸，幾個農(nóng)場甚至面臨破產(chǎn)的困境。這一天，我在廚房里忙活的時候看見六歲的兒子比利從家到森林來來回回奔走了一個多小時。去的時候走得小心翼翼，回來的時候大步奔跑。好奇之下，我偷偷跟在他的身后想看看他究竟在干什么。結(jié)果發(fā)現(xiàn)他雙手窩成杯狀捧了幾勺水前往森林。森林里出現(xiàn)了一只母鹿，頂著一對巨大的角，還有一只幼鹿躺在地上。我?guī)缀躞@叫起來。然而，比利徑直向它們走去。會發(fā)生什么事呢？文本特點：這是一個有標題的故事：生命之水。故事的前半部分為續(xù)寫提供了相當多的線索：缺少雨水的現(xiàn)狀、一只快要渴死的幼鹿、這一天里見證了一次真正的分享和一個奇跡的發(fā)生。所有這一些都暗示了續(xù)寫的兩個片段要圍繞“分享”和“奇跡”來講述“這一天”里發(fā)生的事。結(jié)合標題“生命之水”，這個奇跡必然與水有關。設計理念：本節(jié)課基于學生在寫作中體現(xiàn)出來的一個突出問題：缺乏文本分析的意識。在比利救了小鹿后天降甘霖的情節(jié)設計富有很大的魔幻現(xiàn)實主義特點，導致學生不敢想、不敢寫，不明白需要構(gòu)建什么樣的情節(jié)；寫作的許多細節(jié)與主題關聯(lián)不大，甚至與上文沖突、無法連貫。希望從語篇分析的角度，引導學生關注原文、解讀原文，了解如何利用上下文構(gòu)建合理的情節(jié)，實現(xiàn)邏輯連貫和提高語言的準確性。Background/ConflictDying:cowsstopgivingmilkwouldbankrupt(使破產(chǎn))severalfarmerscreeksandstreamslonggonebackintotheearthCropsdryinglfwedidn'tseesomerainsoon,wewouldloseeverythingInfer:Therewasanurgentneedforrain!lt'sbettertosolvetheconflictwhendesigningtheplot主要人物：I（mother'sperspective）Billymotherdeerwithahugepairofdeerhorns(mightbeadangertotheboy）babyfawnlyingonthedrygroundmightbedyingofthirst)情節(jié)設計：Para1:Didthemotherdeerhurthim?Whatwasthemotherdeer'sreaction?HowdidBillyfeedthebabyfawn?Whatdidthebabyfawndo?(standup/stilldyingofthirst)Para2:HowdidIfeelaboutthescene?WhatdidIdo?AppreciatetheuseofspecificverbsindescriptionHewasn'twalkingwiththeusualcarefreeabandonofayouthbutwithaseriouspurpose.Minutesafterhedisappearedintothewoods,hecamerunningoutagaintowardthehouse.Icrept(躡手躡腳地走)outofthehouseandfollowedhimonhisjourney.Hewascupping(窩成杯狀)bothhandsinfrontofhimashewalked,verycarefulnottospillthewaterheheld.sneaked(crept)closerashewentintothewoods.Ialmostscreamedtogethimaway.It'sbettertofollowthelanguagestyle.DescribewhatIwitnessedvividlyHowdidBillyfeedthefawn?>Cautiously,Billycroucheddownbytheweakfawn,holdingthewaterinhiscuppedhandsandslowlysendingittoitsmouth.Anxiouslyyetgently,hekneltdownbesidethebabyfawn,carefullystretchedhisarms,andsentthetwoorthreetablespoonstoitsmouth.>Hecrouchedgingerlyinfrontofthefawn,stretchingouthishandswiththewaterinthepalms.“Drinkit!”hemurmured.Whatdidthefawndo?>Thebabyfawnlifteditsheadslowlyanddrankthewaterinhistinyhands.>Thepoorcreature,apparentlyindesperateneedofwater,lickeditupquicklywithitsshell-pinktongue.>Thethirstyfawndrankthewatergreedily,andmuchtomysurprise,thefeeblecreaturestruggledtoitsfeetslowly.Whatdidthemotherdeerdo?>Themotherdeerloweredherheadandlickedmyboy'scheekgently,asexpressinggratitude..參考范文Para1:However,Billywalkedrightuptothem.Cautiouslyhekneltdownbytheweakbabyfawn,seeminglyfamiliarwiththetwocreatures.Thefawnsufferingfromdehydrationandheatexhaustionlifteditsheadupwithgreateffortsandeagerlylappedupthewatercuppedinmybeautifulboy'shands.Themotherdeerstoodbyasifinguard.NotuntilthefawnlickedthelastdripofwaterdidBillymovealittlebit.Icontainedmyselfnottomakeaslightestsound,forfearofscaringthem.Iwitnessedthemostbeautifulheartworkinghardtosavealife.Withthewatergone,Billyjumpedtohisfeetandmetmysmilingeyes.Beforehetriedtoexplain,Istrodetohimandheldhimtight.Asthetear