2023年全國(guó)1卷讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)-我的寫(xiě)作比賽講義（素材）

讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)原文WhenIwasinmiddleschool,mysocialstudiesteacherencouragedmetoenterforawritingcontest.Ididnotlovewritingand

myteacherhadallowedmetopresentmypaperonthesinkingoftheTitanic

asanoralreport—aone-actplay,whereIplayedalltheparts.Noonelaughedharderthanhe.So,whytodosomethingatwhichIwassuretofail?Hisreply:“BecauseIloveyourstories.Andifyou’rewillingtoapplyyourself,Ithinkyou

haveagoodshotat有機(jī)會(huì)

this.”IchosePaulRevere’shorseasmysubject.Thestorywouldcome

straightfromthehorse’smouth絕對(duì)可靠.Notabrilliant

notion/idea,butfunny;andunlikelytobeanyoneelse’schoice.Whatdidthehorsethink,ashe

ripped/got

throughthenight?Didhegettired?Havedoubts?Didhewanttoquit?Isympathizedimmediately.Igottired.I

haddoubts.Iwantedtoquit.But,likeRevere’s

fabled/imaginary

horse,Ikeptgoing.Iworkedhard.Icheckedmyspelling.

Withadictionary.

I

enlisted/asked

myoldersistertocorrectmygrammar.Icheckedoutahalf-dozenbooksonPaulReverefromthelibrary.Ievenreadafewofthem.WhenIhandedinthefinishedessay,myteacherreadit,laughedoutloud,andsaid,“Great.Now,writeitagain.Andnoname.Entriesareanonymous匿名的.”Iwroteitagain.Andagainandagain.IfIdidn’twin,Ididn’tcare.Paragraph1:WhenIalmostforgotthecontest,thenewscame.Paragraph2:Iwenttotheteacher’sofficeaftertheawardpresentation.續(xù)寫(xiě)閱卷情節(jié)走向：第一段：1.

指出“News“的具體內(nèi)容是什么2.

“我”對(duì)于這個(gè)消息的反應(yīng)？3.

對(duì)于這個(gè)消息，“我”做出了什么樣的準(zhǔn)備？（準(zhǔn)備“獲獎(jiǎng)感言”？）4.

“我”有沒(méi)有獲獎(jiǎng)？5.

“我”如何發(fā)表獲獎(jiǎng)感言，大家又是什么樣的反應(yīng)？（和原文第一段的“Brazil”和“l(fā)augh”回扣）6.

如何銜接第二段的“我”去老師辦公室？第二段：1.

“如何寫(xiě)老師對(duì)于

“我”獲獎(jiǎng)的肯定？（通過(guò)原文設(shè)計(jì)）”

或“如何寫(xiě)老師對(duì)于我沒(méi)有如愿的撫慰？（利用原文信息2.

“我”對(duì)于老師做法的反應(yīng)？以及“我”對(duì)于這次比賽的心路歷程？3.

升華主旨（利用好原文信息的

“horse”）改卷總則：以學(xué)生情節(jié)的完整性（四處銜接，有錯(cuò)就酌情降檔）和語(yǔ)言的準(zhǔn)確性整體定檔。有效利用原文信息進(jìn)行協(xié)同升華者，可以酌情升檔?？梢詤⒖嫉膮f(xié)同有：1．這一次“我”巴西味的英語(yǔ)講話，贏得了滿(mǎn)堂彩，而不是laugh（對(duì)于文本第一段）2．“我”此前“againandagain”的努力在這一刻takeshape（有了具體的模樣），givingwayto此處協(xié)同來(lái)自于文本前面“我”訓(xùn)練寫(xiě)作的努力，“givewayto”是文本的詞匯。3．有效回答原文作者自己對(duì)自己提出的幾個(gè)問(wèn)題：Whatdidthehorsethink,ashespedthroughthenight?Didhegettired?Havedoubts?Didhewanttoquit?4．升華主旨把“horse”用上，比如：Outofhisoffice,Iwassopeacefullylight-heartedthatIcouldhearthehorseneighinginmyheartagain,butthistimeIknewheyellednotonlyfortellingtales,butforcontinuingoursharedvoyageofwriting.思路1：消息傳來(lái)，“我”成為了獲獎(jiǎng)的候選人（并不知道確切消息）a.“我”如愿獲得大獎(jiǎng)，習(xí)作第二段寫(xiě)老師對(duì)于“我“努力的肯定。b.“我”沒(méi)有如愿，沒(méi)有獲獎(jiǎng)或者拿到了略遜于一等獎(jiǎng)的獎(jiǎng)，習(xí)作第二段寫(xiě)老師對(duì)于“我“的撫慰注：這種走向，第一段的部分寫(xiě)作重點(diǎn)就落在

“我”的情緒刻畫(huà)上思路2：消息傳來(lái)，“我”明確獲得了大獎(jiǎng)。因此主辦方邀請(qǐng)

“我”在頒獎(jiǎng)典禮上發(fā)發(fā)言。這種走向，第一段的寫(xiě)作重點(diǎn)就落在

“我”準(zhǔn)備獲獎(jiǎng)感言上。第二段寫(xiě)老師對(duì)于“我“努力的肯定。下水文1：Afewweekslater,whenIalmostforgotthecontest,therecamethenews.ThemomentIsawmynameonthetopofthefirstprizelist,surpriseandjoyoccupiedmymind.Despitetheobstacleandconfusionontheroad,thehorseeventuallyreachedhisdestinationwithdetermination.Iwasinvitedtodeliveraspeechontheawardpresentation.IexplainedwhyIchosethisspecialsubjectandevenactedoutone-roleplayasRevere’shorseonthestage,whichmadetheaudiencelaughout.Intheend,Ishowedmygratitudetothehorserider---mysocialstudiesteacher.Iwenttomyteacher’sofficeaftertheawardpresentation.Bathedintheenjoyment,hewavedatmeandexpressedhiscongratulations.Withtearsalmostblurringmyvision,Igavehimabighug.Withouthisencouragement,Icouldn’thavewontheprize.Itwashimthatcarvedmywritingpath.Goldensunlightscatteredthroughtheofficewindow,spreadinghebrightnessandwarmth.Hepattedmybackandlaughedoutagain.Thenhepointedthatmypassion,devotionandpersistencecontributedtomysuccess.

“Justlikethehorseyouwrote,hegottiredandhaddoubts,buthekeptgoing.”下水文2：WhenIalmostforgotthecontest,thenewscame.

ItwasaphonecallsayingthatIamawinner.WhenIknewIwontheprize,awideexcitementtookholdofme.

Irushedtomymotherwithexcitementandsharedthefantasticnewswithher.

Onhearingoftheunexpectednews,

shewassosurprisedthatshefrozewithhermouthwideopen.

Afterawhile,excitedtearsstreameddownhercheeks.

Afterthat,bathedinthewarmsunshine,wemadeourwaytotheawardpresentation.

Onthewaymymotherremindmethatwithoutyourteacher'sencouragementyouwouldn’thavemademuchprogressinwritinginEnglish.Iwenttotheteacher’sofficeaftertheawardpresentation.

WithtearsinmyeyesIsaidtohim,

“Iwouldliketoexpressmyheartfeltgratitudetoyouforyourtimelyhelp.Itwasyourencouragementthatmademebraveenoughtosignupforthecompetition.”

Hesteppedforward,pattedmeontheshoulder,andsaidsoftly,

“wherethereisawill,thereisaway.”

Wehuggedeachotherastightlyaspossibleandoureyeswerefilledwithtears.

OnlythendidIrealizethatitwasbraveryanddeterminationthatcanconquerallthedifficulties.

Hardworkpaidoffeventually.【精美詞匯】takeholdof握住;抓住,控制住;得到,占有;掌握rushto匆忙前