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Chapter9Family
May15thof2006istheeleventhInternationalFamilyDay.Since1980s,thenumberofthefamiliesintheworldhasbeenincreasinggreatly;whilethefamilyscaleshavebeenshrinkingsteadily,andpeople’sconceptionoffamilyhaschangedalot.Allofthesechangesbringaboutagreatshocktothewholesocietyalong.Inthischapterwewillmainlytalkaboutthefamiliesofthetwoculturesfromthefollowingaspects:Chapter9FamilyMay15thResidenceandPrivacy2.ParentsandChildren3.Housework4.FamilyStructureResidenceandPrivacy2.PareⅠ.ResidenceandPrivacyThereisalwaysabigorsmallyardinmostwesternhomes,withsomebushesaroundtheyard.Butthereseldomisanytallandbigenclosingwall.ManyAmericansjustusesomecurtainsorshutterstoseparatetheinsidefromtheoutside.Ⅰ.ResidenceandPrivacyThereWhileinChina,thehousesarealwaysenclosedbyaverytallandbigwall,whichoftenseparatestheinsideworldapartfromtheoutsidecompletely.Fromtheoutsideworld,peoplecanjustseetheroof.Behindthetallwall,thereisashorterone,withawoodenscreenseparatingtheoutsidefromtheinsideagain.WhileinChina,thehouses2.Asfortheinsidearrangementsofthehouse,therearealsosomedifferences.Thewesternersputonmuchstressontheirpersonalspace.Therefore,respectivelythereisadoorinthebathroom,bedroom,sitting-roomoreventhekitchen.Nobodycaninvadeanyoneelse’spersonalspace:parentshavenothefreedomtoenterthechildren’sroom,andthesamewiththechildren.2.AsfortheinsidearrangemeInmanyChinesefamilies,unlesstherearemarriedchildren,therearefewpersonalrights.SomeChinesechildren,evenwithabighouse,maystaywiththeirparentsuntilseveralyearsold.Parentscaninterfereintheirchildren’saffairs,andchildrenalsohavetherighttousetheirparents’articles.Whenthechildrenbreaksomething,theirparentsmayblamethemforthebreakingbutnotfortheirprivacy.InmanyChinesefamilies,uⅡ.ParentsandChildrenOntherelationshipbetweentheparentsandchildren,therearealotofdifferencesbetweenthetwocultures.TheWesternerspaymuchattentiontotheirchildren’srights.Thiscanbeembodiedinsomanyorganizationsforchildren,suchastheChildren’sWelfareAssociationmentionedinthemovieGuasha.WhileinChina,parentsareinfullchargeoftheirchildren.Ⅱ.ParentsandChildrenOn2.IntheWesterncountries,parentsmaylearnfromtheirchildren,especially,theyareproudofthisbehavior.Theimportantthingfortheparentsiswhattheyshoulddofortheirchildren.TheChineseparentsseldomlearnfromtheirchildren.Whattheystressiswhatcantheirchildrendoforthem,evenwhenthechildrenarelearningfortheirfuture,theymayputonthismission---fortheirparents’sake.2.IntheWesterncountries,3.Fortheabovereason,inChina,onlythefinancialsupportfortheparentsisfarfromenough.Thechildrenmustkeepinmindthattheirparentsarealwaysright.Andwheneverandwherevertheyare,theyshouldmanagetomeettheirparents’desireandmakesureoftheirsafety.Whenparentscannotgetwellalongwithhiswife,amanevenmaydivorceforhisparents’sake.3.Fortheabovereason,inCh4.Theotherdifferenceisreflectedintheattitudestowardstoys.Whenthechildbreaksatoy,theChinesemothermaypunishherchild,whiletheAmericanmothermaypraisethechildforhisorhercreativity.InChina,atoymaybekeptforseveralyears,even,severalgenerations.AnAmericanmothermaythinkofitassignalsofbeingslow.4.Theotherdifferenceisref5.Whenwesternerstalkabouttheirfamily,theyoftenrefertotheirparentsandtheunmarriedsiblings.WhilewhenitcomestoChinese,theymayalsoincludetheirgrandparentsandotherevenmarriedrelatives.Theymaynotlivetogether,buttheyareofteninthesamevillageorthenearone,whichisourChinesetradition.Thewesternersoftenlivefarawayfromeachother,onlytogatheronfestivalsorholidays.5.Whenwesternerstalkabout6.DuetothedifferenceinNo.5,childrencontactwithnotonlytheirparentsandsiblings,butalsootherrelatives,whichmeanstheyhavearelativelybiggerinterpersonalandeducationalcircle.Forexample,inChina,allmembersoftheeldergenerationcaninstructachild,butinwesterncountries,it’sonlytheparents’duty.6.DuetothedifferenceinNo7.Anotherdifferenceis,inChina,parentsandchildrendependoneachotherclosely.Forexample,inChina,asonmustsupporthisfather(somebigfamilieswithlargecapital),andthefathershouldalsosupporthisson.8.Generationgapisaveryseriousprobleminwesterncountries.Becauseparentsalwayscannotagreewiththeirchildreninmanyaspectslikeclothes,hairstyle,job,friendsormarriage.Manychildrenmayleavetheirhome,dropoutofschooloreventakedrugs.Itisalsoamaincauseofthequarrelbetweenmother-in-lawanddaughter-in-law.7.Anotherdifferenceis,inCⅢ.Housework
InBritain,apartfromsomeyoungmen,theconservativemenwillneverdohousework.Theythinkdoinghouseworkisthewife’staskandtheyconsideritashamed.ThereforeinBritain,manymenwouldliketoreadnewspapersonsofaorwatchTVratherthanhelptheirwivestodosomething.WhileinAmerica,husbandsmayalwayshelptheirwivescleanthehouseorlookaftertheirchildren.Atleisure,Americanhusbandsoftenplaywiththeirchildrenandteachthemsomeathleticskills.Ⅲ.HouseworkInBritain,1.Inwesterncountriesmarriedchildrenusuallydonotlivewiththeirparents.Onepatternthatwascommoninthe1950sandcoversaboutoneineightfamiliestodayiswheretheparentsandmarriedchildrenliveclosetogetherbutinseparatehouses.Thefamilybondremainsstrongbymeetingeachotherfrequentlytohelpeachotherwhenneededandmothersanddaughtersarelikelytomeeteachotherfrequently.Ⅳ.FamilyStructure1.Inwesterncountriesmarrie2.Anotherpatterniswhereparentsandmarriedchildrenlivefurtherapart(usuallyaboutanhour’scardrivefromeachother).Theymaymeetonlyonceortwiceamonthbutkeepincontactwitheachotherbytelephoneandhelpeachotherwhennecessary.Thispatternisgrowingandcoversabouthalfofthepopulation.Itisfoundespeciallyinmiddle-classfamiliesinthesoutheastofEngland.2.Anotherpatterniswherepa3.Themostcommonfamilypatterninwesterncountriesiscallednuclearfamily---onlyparentsandtheirunmarriedchildren(oftenoneortwochildrenliveinasetofhouse.NuclearfamilyisthecharacteristicofWesternfamilies.3.Themostcommonfamilypatt4.Apartfromnuclearfamily,thereisastableincreaseinsingleparentfamilyduetotheincreasingdivorcerate,livingapartofthecouple,oneabandoningtheotherandtheincreaseofbastards(私生子).Therearealwaysalotoffinancialproblemsinsingleparentfamilies.Thefinancialstatusofsingleparentfamiliesisonlynexttotheunemployedandthoselivingonoldagepension.Inadditionthechildrenwithoutfathersaremorelikelytocommitcrimes.4.Apartfromnuclearfamily,5.Withtheincreaseofdivorce,remarryingisanothercommonphenomenoninwesterncountries.Remarriedparentshavetheirownchildrenorchildwiththechildrenfromtheformerfamilies.Inthiscaseachildmayhavetwofathersandtwomothers.Alsotheremaybesomenewproblems.Getsth.fromthissentence“John,yourchildrenandmychildrenarebeatingourchild.”5.Withtheincreaseofdivorc6.Inwesterncountries,thereisanotherpocket-sizedfamily.Thiskindoffamilyiscomposedbysomefashionablecouples.Theyarejustenthusiasticabouttherealizationoftheirself-valueandself-development,andtheyonlystriveforpersonalfreedomandenjoyment.Theyarenotinterestedinbearingchildren.Nowwithmoreandmorewomengoingouttoworkandhavingtheirownincome,thiskindoffamilywhichiscalledDINKFamily---DoubleIncomeNoKids
developsveryfast6.Inwesterncountries,there7.AccordingtoanarticleinTimes,thetypesofBritishfamilieshavehadgreatchangesinthelastthreedecades.Thetrendmainlyisthedecreaseofmarriedhousehold:from55%in1991to45%in2001.Thusthereoccurssomeothertypesoffamilypatterns:onepersonfamilies(causedbytheincreaseinthenumberofelderlypeopleinBritain---emptynestandyoungpeoplechoosingtoliveontheirownaswellasmoreandmoreyoungpeoplechoosesinglelife.)7.Accordingtoanarticlein
(2)Cohabitants/compoundfamily(Thisgroupincludesthreesub-types:①thetwoperson’srelationshipisinfacthusbandandwife.Theyjustdidn’thavetheregistrationandwedding.Theymayalsohavetheirchildren.Itisreportedthatthereare11%oftheBritishchildrenunder16livinginsuchfamilies.②thetwoarejustfriendsorcolleagues,andtheyjustshareasetofhouseandtheyhavetheirownliferespectively.ThisisverycommoninChinatoo.)(2)Cohabitants/compoundfamil③thethirdistherearenotonlytwocohabitants.Maybeseveralsinglesorseveralcoupleslivetogetherandtheyallhavetheirownlivesbuttheymaysharesomeexpenses.Thiskindoffamilyisnowcalledgroupfamilyandisverypopularinmanybigcitiesforthesakeofhighexpenses.③thethirdistherearenoton8.Thereisalsoanincreaseinanothertwotypesofhouseholds:kangaroo’sfamily(oldunmarriedchildrenlivingwiththeirparents)andthehouseholdwithyounghusbandandolderwife(老妻少夫).
9.SINKfamily:withthechangeofpeople’snotion,thereoccursfull-timewifeorfull-timehusbandwithoutchildandthiskindoffamilyiscalledSINKfamily---SingleIncomeNokids.Manypeoplemaystriveforthiskindoflife,butithassomepotentialdangerasitmaydestroyaperson’spsychologicalbalance.
8.Thereisalsoanincreasei10.Besidestheabovefamilypatterns,inwesterncountries,therearealsothefamilieswithseveralgenerations---maybethreeorfourlivetogether---calledextendedfamilywhichistypicalofChina.10.Besi
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