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親情類讀后續(xù)寫指導案例
——以生病的Mike讀后續(xù)寫為例TeachingObjectives:Afterthisclass,studentswillbeableto:1.explorethegiventextincludingitstexttype,tense,theme,conflict,sixbasicelements,itsplotsandsoon;2.haveagoodunderstandingofhowtoworkoutthefameworkandconstructtheplotinthecontinuationwritingonfamilyaffections(親情)usingQ-Astrategy;3.cherishfamilyaffections.Lead-inbywatchingashortvideoandhaveadiscussioningroups.Let’shaveadiscussioningroups:1.Whathappenedbetweenthemotherandson?2.Didthesongotoschoolfinally?Why?3.Canyoupredictwhathislifewillbelikeinthefuture?TheGivenText01Comprehension02Let’sexplorethetext.1.What’sthe
theme?
Healthyeating&honesty.
Parents’
andkid’s
to
unhealthyfood;(1)Parents:didn’tgivemoneytobuyjunkfood;(2)Mike:stronglywishedtobuyjunkfood;secretlytakesomefromhismom’swallet;boughtabagoffood...;hungaroundoutsidetoenjoythefood..;didn'ttakenoticeofit.
Let’ssearchformoredetailedinformation:oppositionaddiction2.What’stheconflict?3.Readforbasicelements:5w+1Hsixbasicelementsmajortense:When
Where
WhoWhatWhyhowwhenMikewassevenyearsold,atnoonthatday,intheafternoonthatdayathome,astore,hospitalMike,Mike’smother,doctorHisparentsusuallydidn'tgivehimmoneybecausehelikedtobuyjunkfood.Theyknewsuchfoodwouldbeharmfultokids’bodies.Hurriedtodrivehimtothehospital;admitwhathehaddone。simplepasttense4.Readforplot:
Mike’sparentsusuallydidn’tgivehimmoneybecausehelikedtobuyjunkfoodMikesecretlytakesomemoneyfromhismom’swalletwithoutlettingherdiscoverit.Paragraph1:Shehurriedtodrivehimtothehospital.
Paragraph2:Mikerealizedheshouldadmitwhathehaddone.
Opening(介紹)
Build-up(發(fā)展)
Climax(高潮)Resolution(解決)Ending(結尾)writingprocess03本課以生病的Mike即IllMike讀后續(xù)寫為案例,嘗試運用G-NandQ-A策略高效的指導學生展開親情類文章的讀后續(xù)寫。在續(xù)寫部分,教師基于原文本信息的解讀以及圍繞兩段首句中hurried;driveto;hospital,realized,admit等關鍵信息以what,how,why等6個問題串進行提問,最后修改、潤色、整理成文。具體操作:語言學王初明教授指出,“內(nèi)容要創(chuàng)造,語言要模仿,創(chuàng)造與模仿要緊密結合”。為了加強讀后續(xù)寫在主題與情感方面與原文的融洽度,分為兩個步驟進行:第一步就是讀:讀懂六要素和主題、讀通情節(jié)和感情發(fā)展并讀精、讀深;第二步就是續(xù)寫:首先要關注銜接,其次就要關注構思。讀后續(xù)寫原文文本一般為記敘文?;谖谋咎攸c,續(xù)寫內(nèi)容的豐富性取決于情節(jié)的發(fā)展(沖突構造--沖突化解--親情升華)。因此,要基于前文的閱讀、圍繞主題,對故事的情節(jié)進行合理的預測和構造,進而發(fā)展為續(xù)寫的內(nèi)容??梢园凑彰慷稳齻€層次,構思每一段的情節(jié)。續(xù)寫第一段基于段首句,延續(xù)文章的發(fā)展預測可能的故事情節(jié)根據(jù)第二段段首句,預測第一段的結束續(xù)寫第二段基于段首句,延續(xù)文章的發(fā)展故事的結局升華:呼應主題——受到教訓,得到啟發(fā),獲得靈感HaveadiscussionWhatquestionswillyouraiseaboutthegiventwofirstsentence?Para1:
Shehurriedtodrivehimtothehospital._____________________________________Para2:Mikerealizedheshouldadmitwhathehaddone.______________________________Possiblequestions:Para1:She
hurriedto
drive
him
to
the
hospital:Q1:What’sMikeandhismom’sresponseandhowdidhefeelonthewaytothehospital?Q2:WhatdidthedoctordoandsayandhowdidMikefeel?WhatdidMike’smomdoandhowdidshefeel?Para2:Mike
realized
he
should
admit
what
he
had
done:Q3:WhatdidMiketellhismomandhowdidhefeelaftertellingthetruthandwhat’shismom’sreaction?Q4:WhatthendidthedoctordowithMike’sillnessanddidhefeelbetteraftertakingthemedicine?Q5:WhatdidMikelearnfromthisexperience?Possiblequestions:Para1:She
hurriedto
drive
him
to
the
hospital.Designtechniques在續(xù)寫第一段的框架下,就續(xù)寫第一段首句中的關鍵人物Mike和Mom,事件:媽媽開車送他去醫(yī)院路上的路上,從人物的動作、行為、心理、情感等方面進行提問和嘗試回答,答案不唯一,合理即可。(注意與原文的銜接)Para1:She
hurriedto
drive
him
to
the
hospital.Q2:WhatdidthedoctordoandsayandhowdidMikefeel?WhatdidMike’smomdoandhowdidshefeel?PA1:Afterparkingthecar,hismomrushedhimtothedoctorswiththenurse’shelp.Afterafewsimplechecks,thedoctorsaidheneededafewfurtherexaminationsaboutthestomach,whichwouldbeverypainfulandexpensive.Seeingthattheywerenotrichandmomfeltsoworriedthathertearsbeganfallingdownherface,Mikerecalledthemomentswhenhisdearmomanddadusuallytaughthimtobeanhonestmanwhengrewup.Designtechniques到醫(yī)院停車后,媽媽有哪些行為、動作、語言等;醫(yī)生問了我什么問題,我的感受如何,什么促使我做出后來承認一切的這一舉動的原因也要設計進取,整個故事應該出現(xiàn)一個促進問題解決-即我承認錯誤以及媽媽原諒我的正能量結尾關鍵性因素。因此,圍繞這些關鍵因素提出了兩個主要的問題并嘗試回答。(注意:沖突構造;注意與續(xù)寫第二段首句的銜接)Para2:Mike
realized
he
should
admit
what
he
had
done.Q3:WhatdidMiketellhismomandhowdidhefeelaftertellingthetruthandwhat’shismom’sreaction?PA1:He
felt
so
sorry
and
guilty.
After
gathering
his
courage,
he
came
close
to
his
mom
and
told
her
that
he
took
a
few
coins
from
her
wallet
and
bought
a
bag
of
peppery
food
and
a
bottle
of
iced
Cocacola.
After
hearing
this,
his
mom
seemed
to
have
understood
everything,
patted
him
gently
on
his
shoulder
and
said
it
was
so
kind
of
you
to
be
honest
and
it
was
not
too
late
to
let
us
know
it.PA2…Designtechniques基于第二首句與正能量結尾構成的框架,圍繞Mike承認錯誤這一事實,結合主題,圍繞關鍵因素Mike的心理活動、語言、動作等進行提問。他承認錯誤前經(jīng)歷了那些思想斗爭,鼓足勇氣,回憶父母一直的教育--做人要誠實,最終承認錯誤,說了什么話,媽媽有何感受?(注意:沖突化解)Para2:Mike
realized
he
should
admit
what
he
had
done.Designtechniques醫(yī)生了解情況之后,說了什么,吃了醫(yī)生開的藥之后,我的情況是否緩解和好轉。Para2:Mike
realized
he
should
admit
what
he
had
done.Q5:WhatdidMikelearnfromthisexperience?PA1:Mikefeltsothankfultohisgreatmomandlearnedthatnomatterwhathappenedweshouldnothesitatetotellourparentsthetruthinordertogettheirtimelyhelp
andpromisedthathedidn’ttakeju
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