全國英語等級考試五級模擬試題3篇

第頁共頁全國英語等級考試五級模擬試題全國英語等級考試五級模擬試題精選3篇（一）全國英語等級考試五級模擬試題Section111Readingprehension(50minutes)PartAReadthefollowingtextsandanswerthequestionswhichacpany.,thembychoosingA,B,CorD.MarkyouranswersonANSWERSHEET1.Text1Aslongasherparentscanremember,13-year-oldKatieHarthasbeentalkingaboutgoingtocollege.Hermother,Tally,afinancial-aidofficerataCaliforniaUniversity,knowsalltoowellthedauntingthingofpayingforacollegeeducation.Lastyeartheaverageyearlytuitionataprivate,four-yearschoolclimbed5.5percenttomorethan$17,000.TheHartshavestartedsaving,andfiguretheycanaffordapublicuniversitywithoutaproblem.ButwhatifKatieappliestoPrinceton(she'sthreatening),whereoneyear'stuition,roomandboard-almost$34,000in2023-willcostmorethansomeluxurycars?EvenanumbercruncherlikeTallyadmitsit'salittlescary,especiallysinceshe'11retireandKatiewillgotocollegeataroundthesametime.Thebestwaytoprepareistostartsavingearly.Anewlawpassedlastyearmakesthateasierforsomefamilies.So-called529plansallowparentstosockawayfundsinfederal-tax-free-investmentaccounts,aslongasthemoneyisusedfor“qualifiededucaionexpenses”liketuition,roomandboard.Theplansaren'tforeveryone.Fortaxreasons,somelowerandmiddleinefamiliesmaybebetteroffchoosingotherinvestments.Butsavingisvital.When'sthebesttimetostart?“Sometime,”saysJackJoyceoftheCollegeBoard,“betweenthematernitywardandmiddleschool.”Aidpackagesusuallyeinsomebinationofgrants,loansandjobs.Thesedays60percentofallaidesintheformoflow-interestloans.Allstudentsareeligiblefor“unsubsidized”federalStaffordloans,whichletthemdeferinterestpaymentsuntilaftergraduation.StudentswhocandemonstrateneedcanalsoqualifyforfederalPerkinsloansor“subsidized”Staffords,wherethegover____entpaystheinterestduringschool.Fortunately,thisisaborrower'smarket.“Interestratesareattheirlowestlevelinthehistoryofstudentloans,”saysMarkKantrowitz,publisherofFinaid.Kantrowitzexpectsratestofallevenfurtherwhenthey'rereviewedthissummer.Traditionalscholarships,academicorathletic,arestillapartofmanyfamilies'planning.MackReiter,a17-year-oldnationalwrestlingchion,getssomanyrecruitinglettershethrowsmostaway.He'11almostcertainlygetafreeride.Withoutit,“wewouldreallybeinabind,”sayshismother,Ja.Foreveryoneelse,it'sworththeefforttopickthrough'local.andnationalscholarshipofferings,whichcanbefoundOlWebsiteslikecollege-board,.A.Thedifficultyofpayingthetuition.B.Thefar-sightoftheparents.C.ThepromisingfutureofKatie.D.Theincreasingtuitionintheuniversity.52.Whatcanweinferfromthesecondparagraph?A.Somefamiliesaretoopoortopaythefullamountofthetuition.B.Theparentsdonotfavortheformofloans.C.Payingthetuitionmakestheparentsfeelhumble.D.Thosewhoareingreatneedmaynotgetwhattheyneed.53.Thelastparagraphsuggeststhat__A.manyrecruitinglettersfailedtoprovideMackReiterwithscholarshipsB.MackReiterwantedtohelphisfamilygooutofthetroubleC.traditionalscholarshipsareagoodsolutiontothetuitionproblemsinsomefamiliesD.MackReiterwasveryproudofhisnationalwrestlingchionship54.Whatdoestheauthormeanby“betteroff”(Line4,Paragraph3)?A.Richer.B.Wiser.C.Happier.D.Luckier.55.Whichofthefollowingistrueaccordingtothetext?A.TheHartspreferapublicuniversitytoaprivateone.B.Itismucheasiertopaythetuitionatpresent.C.Allstudentscangettheaidpackage.D.Traditionalscholarshipsarestillattractivetosomefamilies.Text2Itwaslateintheafternoon,andIwasputtingthefinaltouchonapieceofwritingthatIwasfeelingprettygoodabout.Iwantedtosaveit,butmycursorhadfrozen.Itriedtoshuttheputerdown,anditseizedupaltogether.Unsureofwhatelsetodo,Iyanked(用力猛拉)thebatteryout:Unfortunately,Windowshadbeeninthemidstofadelicateandcrucialundertaking.Thenextmorning,whenIturnedmyputerbackon,itinformedmethatafilehadbeencorruptedandWindowswouldnotload.Then,itofferedtorepairitselfbyusingtheWindowsSetupCD.“Myputeristellingmeafileiscorruptedanditwantstofixitself,butIdon'thavetheWindowsSetupCD.”Itquicklybecameclearthatthewomanwasnotaputertechnician.Herjobwastoserveasagatekeeper,ahumanshieldforthetechnicians.Hersoleduty,asfarasIcouldtell,wastoraiseglobalstresslevels.Tomakemedisappear,thewoman:gavemethephonenumberforWindows'creator,Microsoft.Thisislikegivingsomeonethephonenumberfor,Idon'tknow,NorthAmerica.Besides,theCDworked;Ijustdidn'thaveit.NomatterhowmanytimesIrepeatedmystory,wecamebacktothesameplace.Shewascalmandresolutelypolite.Whenmyvoicehitacertaindecibel(分貝),Iwaspassedalong,likeahot,irritablepotato,toatechnician.“Youdon'thavetheWindowsSetupCD,ma'am,becauseyoudon'tneedit,”heexplainedcheerfully.“Windowscamepreinstalledonyourputer!”“ButIdoneedit.”“Yes,butyoudon'thaveit.”Wewentonlikethisforawhile.,Finally,heofferedtowalkmethroughtheuseofadifferentCD,onethatwoulderasemyentiresystem.“Ofcourse,you'dloseallyoure-mail,yourdocuments,yourphotos.”Itwaslikeofferingtodropasafeonmyheadtocuremyheadache.“Youmightbeabletorecoverthem,butitwouldbeexpensive.”Hesoundeddelighted.“Andit'snotcovetedbythewarranty(產(chǎn)品保證書)!”Thesafebegantoseemlikeagoodidea,provideditwasfull.56.Whydidtheauthorshutdownherputerabruptly?A.Shehadsavedwhatshehadwritten.B.Shecouldn'tmovethecursor.C.Theputerrefusedtowork.D.Theputerofferedtorepairitself.57.Whichofthefollowingistheauthor'sopinionaboutthewomanattheGlobalSupportCentre?A.Shesoundedhelpfulandknowledgeable.B.Shewastheretomakecallersfrustrated.C.Shewasabletosolveherputerproblem.,D.Shewasquicktopassheralongtoatechnician.58.Accordingtothepassage,thesolutionofferedbythetechnicianwas__A.effectiveB.economicalC.unpracticalD.unacceptable59.“Itwaslikeofferingtodropasafeonmyheadtocuremyheadache”inthelastbutoneparagraphmeansthatA.thetechnician'sproposalwouldmakethingsevenworseB.thetechnician'sproposalcouldeventuallysolvetheproblemC.filesstoredonherputerwerelikeasafeD.erasingtheentiresystemwaslikecuringaheadache60.ItcanbeinferredfromthepassagethatthedifferencesbetweentheGlobalSupportCentreandthelocalrepairshoplieinallthefollowingEXCEPTA.efficiencyB.locationC.SetupCDsD.attitudeText3Women'smindsworkdifferentlyfrommen's.Atleast,thatiswhatmostmenareconvincedof.Psychologistsviewthesubjecteitherasamatterorfrustrationorajoke.Nowthebiologistshavemovedintothisminefield,andsomeofthemhavefoundthattherearerealdifferencesbetweenthebrainsofmenandwomen.Butbeingdifferent,theypointouthurriedly,isnotthesameasbeingbetterorworse.Thereis,however,adefinitestructuralvariationbetweenthemaleandfemalebrain.Thedifferenceisinapartofthebrainthatisusedinthemostplexintellectualprocesses-thelinkbetweenthetwohalvesofthebrain.Researchshowedthatthesetwohalvesofthebrainhaddifferentfunctions,andthatthecorpuscallosumenabledthemtoworktogether.Formostpeople,thelefthalfisusedforwordhanding,analyticalandlogicalactivities;therighthalfworksonpictures,patternsandforms.Weneedbothhalvesworkingtogether.Andthebettertheconnections,themoreharmoniouslythetwohalveswork.And,accordingtoresearchfindings,womenhavethebetterconnections.Weshah'tknowforawhile,partlybecausewedon'tknowofanypreciserelationshipbetweenabilitiesinschoolsubjectandthefunctioningofthetwohalvesofthebrain,andwecannotunderstandhowthetwohalvesinter-actviathecorpuscallosum.Butthisstrikingdifferencemusthavesomeeffectand,becausethedifferenceisinthepartsofthebraininvolvedinintellect,weshouldbelookingfordifferencesinintellectualprocessing.61.WhichofthefollowingstatementsisCORRECT?A.Biologistsareconductingresearchwherepsychologistshavegivenup.B.Braindifferencespointtosuperiorityofonesexovertheother.C.Resultsofscientificresearchfailtosupportpopularbelief.D.Thestructuraldifferenceinthebrainbetweenthesexeshaslongbeenknown.62.Accordingtothepassageitismonlybelievedthatbraindifferencesarecausedby__factors.A.biologicalB.psychologicalC.physicalID]social63.“thesedifferences”inparagraph5refertothosein__A.skillsofmenandwomenB.schoolsubjectsC.thebrainstructureofmenandwomenD.activitiescarriedoutbythebrainA.thebrainstructureasawholeB.thefunctioningofpartofthebrainC.thedistinctionbetweenthesexesED]theeffectsofthecorpuscallosum65.Whatisthemainpurposeofthepassage?A.Tooutlinetheresearchfindingsonthebrainstructure.B.Toexplainthelinkbetweensexandbrainstructure.C.To.discussthevariousfactorsthatcausebraindifferences.D.Tosuggestnewareasinbrainresearch.SectionHIReadingprehension《共計35分，權(quán)重35%)PartA(每題1分，共計l5分)Textl短文賞析本文采用提出問題分析^p問題的形式，指出支付高昂的大學(xué)學(xué)費(fèi)對很多家庭來說都有些力不從心，以及一些助學(xué)貸款及其他資助工程所起的作用。第一段提出問題，以哈特家為例，說明支付大學(xué)學(xué)費(fèi)對家庭造成的壓力;第二段指出大多數(shù)家庭支付大學(xué)學(xué)費(fèi)的方式以及存在的一些問題：第三段指出家庭存錢的作用;第四段指出資助工程的形式;第五段指出傳統(tǒng)獎學(xué)金的吸引力。答案及解析51.A【解析】原文對應(yīng)信息是：“Even...Tallyadmitsit’Salittlescary，especiallysinceshe’11retireandKatiewillgotocollegeataroundthesametime.”意為“面l臨自己將要退休，同時孩子要上大學(xué)，這確實有點(diǎn)令人害怕。”我們可知Tally對支付自己女兒的學(xué)費(fèi)有點(diǎn)害怕。B、C、D均不是作者想要表達(dá)的原因。所以此題應(yīng)選A。52.D【解析】原文對應(yīng)信息是：“Eagertoboosttheirmagazinerankings，whicharebasedinpartonthetestscoresofenteringfreshmen，they’rethrowingmoleaidatsmarterkids--whethertheyneeditornot.”該句話說明“學(xué)校為了進(jìn)步其雜志排名，就在經(jīng)濟(jì)上給予那些比擬聰明的孩子較大的幫助，不管他們需不需要幫助”。由此可以看出，急需幫助的學(xué)生并不一定就能獲得幫助。所以A、B、C均不符合題意。所以此題應(yīng)選D。53.C【解析】原文對應(yīng)信息是：“Traditionalscholarships，academicorathletic.arestillapartofmanyfamilies’planning.”意為“許多家庭還在依賴傳統(tǒng)的獎學(xué)金，不管是學(xué)習(xí)上的還是體育上的。”所以此題應(yīng)選C。54.B【解析】文中提到的方案有助于存錢，但這樣的方案并不適用于每一個人，然后給出了其中的一個原因，來說明對于低收入和中等收入的家庭來講，選擇其他投資方式會比這種方式好。由此可猜出詞義。所以此題應(yīng)選B。55.D【解析】選項A意思不準(zhǔn)確，文中提到公立大學(xué)和私立大學(xué)的學(xué)費(fèi)問題，但并沒有說明家長的態(tài)度和傾向;選項B意思不對，文中對應(yīng)信息是第二段;申請貸款并不是無條件的，這是選項C的錯誤所在。綜觀全文，可以看出傳統(tǒng)意義上的獎學(xué)金還是很有吸引力的。所以此題應(yīng)選D。Text2短文賞析本文講述了作者在對自己認(rèn)為非常滿意的一篇文章收尾時，電腦出問題了，之后與全球技術(shù)支持中心的客服聯(lián)絡(luò)的過程。作者認(rèn)為那個女客服一點(diǎn)都不合格，她的解釋只會令人越聽越糊涂。但是接下來女客服把微軟的號碼告訴作者之后，技術(shù)人員的解釋仍然令人費(fèi)解，甚至最后試圖敷衍了事。經(jīng)過一番折騰之后，作者送到附近的小店里維修之后，一切恢復(fù)正常。文章帶有幽默挖苦的意味，以兩個人在同一地點(diǎn)議論同一天氣完畢。答案及解析56.B【解析】第一段中，作者說自己想保存文件，但是光標(biāo)不動了，死機(jī)了。只有把電池拔出強(qiáng)行關(guān)機(jī)，所以排除A，D。c中說電腦回絕工作，不合題意。所以此題應(yīng)選B。57.B【解析】此題是有關(guān)作者態(tài)度的問題。由第5、6段可以看出女客服的答復(fù)令人很不滿，很沮喪。所以此題應(yīng)選B。58.D【解析】此題問技術(shù)員的答復(fù)如何。文章中“ButIdoneedit.”“Yes.butyoudon’thaveit.”Wewentonlikethisforawhile.Fi-nally.heofferedtowalkmethrough...可以看出“技術(shù)員最后是在敷衍作者，沒有提出一個合理的解決方法”。所以此題應(yīng)選D。59.A【解析】“Itwaslikeofferingtodropasafeonmyheadtocuremyheadache.”意為“就像給我提供一個保險箱放我頭上來治愈我的頭痛一樣?！焙钔诳嗟卣f技術(shù)員提供的建議不可采取。所以此題應(yīng)選A。60.C【解析】由文中可知全球技術(shù)支持中心跟當(dāng)?shù)匦蘩淼甑膮^(qū)別在于，當(dāng)?shù)匦蘩淼晷矢?，地點(diǎn)近，態(tài)度好。題目問的'是除了哪個選項以外，其他都是二者的不同。所以此題應(yīng)選C。Text3短文賞析這篇有關(guān)大腦構(gòu)造的文章，介紹男性、女性大腦構(gòu)造及工作方式的不同，以及科學(xué)家的研究成果。男女大腦的工作方式有別不是指哪個好哪個壞，而是在處理復(fù)雜事件時.腦的不同局部起的作用不同。男女大腦的構(gòu)造不同，科學(xué)家們發(fā)現(xiàn)女性的胼胝體的神經(jīng)元比男性的要大，要豐富。左右大腦控制的部位各不一樣。左大腦是用來文字處理。分析^p和進(jìn)展邏輯動的;而右大腦是對圖片、圖式和形式起作用的。我們需要兩邊協(xié)調(diào)共同作用。兩半腦連接得越好，那么兩半邊在一起的協(xié)調(diào)就越好。據(jù)研究發(fā)現(xiàn)，女性的兩半腦之間的連接更好一些。作者說我們不知道學(xué)校學(xué)生的才能和大腦兩半球功能之間確實切關(guān)系。我們不懂大腦兩半球是如何通過胼胝體互相作用的。最后作者間接地提出期望，希望能對胼胝體對人體的影響多做研究工作。答案及解析61.c【解析】選項A即心理學(xué)家已經(jīng)放棄，而生物學(xué)家正在展開研究工作。而文中第三句話說“Psychologistsviewthesubjecteitherasamatteroffrustrationorajoke，”即心理學(xué)家認(rèn)為這個研究不是一件沮喪的事，就是一個笑話，此句和選項A含義不一樣。選項B即大腦區(qū)別顯示出一個性別優(yōu)于另外一個性別。而文中第一段最后一句話說“Butbeingdifferent，theypointouthurriedly，isnotthesameasbeingbetterorworse.”即他們指出盡管有區(qū)別，但并不能說明誰優(yōu)誰劣，此句和選項B含義不一樣。選項D兩性大腦構(gòu)造的區(qū)別早已為人所知。而文中第三段第三句話說“Thisisthefirsttimethatastructuraldifferencehasbeenfoundbetweenthebrainsofwomenandmen...”即這是第一次人們發(fā)現(xiàn)了兩性大腦構(gòu)造的不同，此句和選項D含義不一樣。所以此題應(yīng)選C。63.A【解析】“這些區(qū)別”指的是什么?短文第五段主題句說“Butitisn’tallthateasytoexplaintheactualdifferencesbetweenskillsofmenandwomenonthisbasis.”即在此根底上解釋兩性技能的區(qū)別并不是很容易的事。由此可見，“這些區(qū)別”指的是兩性技能。所以此題應(yīng)選A。64.D【解析】文章的結(jié)尾，作者說我們不知道學(xué)校學(xué)生的才能和大腦兩半球功能之間確實切關(guān)系;我們不懂大腦兩半球是如何通過cor-puscallosum互相作用的;間接地提出對于corpuscallosum的影響，多作研究工作。所以此題應(yīng)選D。65.A【解析】文章的主要目的是什么?短文介紹科學(xué)家在有關(guān)大腦構(gòu)造方面的研究成果。B、C、D只是片面上的。所以此題應(yīng)選A。全國英語等級考試五級模擬試題精選3篇（二）全國英語等級考試五級試題閱讀理解輔導(dǎo)Text2Itwaslateintheafternoon,andIwasputtingthefinaltouchonapieceofwritingthatIwasfeelingprettygoodabout.Iwantedtosaveit,butmycursorhadfrozen.Itriedtoshuttheputerdown,anditseizedupaltogether.Unsureofwhatelsetodo,Iyanked(用力猛拉)thebatteryout:Unfortunately,Windowshadbeeninthemidstofadelicateandcrucialundertaking.Thenextmorning,whenIturnedmyputerbackon,itinformedmethatafilehadbeencorruptedandWindowswouldnotload.Then,itofferedtorepairitselfbyusingtheWindowsSetupCD.“Myputeristellingmeafileiscorruptedanditwantstofixitself,butIdon'thavetheWindowsSetupCD.”Itquicklybecameclearthatthewomanwasnotaputertechnician.Herjobwastoserveasagatekeeper,ahumanshieldforthetechnicians.Hersoleduty,asfarasIcouldtell,wastoraiseglobalstresslevels.Tomakemedisappear,thewoman:gavemethephonenumberforWindows'creator,Microsoft.Thisislikegivingsomeonethephonenumberfor,Idon'tknow,NorthAmerica.Besides,theCDworked;Ijustdidn'thaveit.NomatterhowmanytimesIrepeatedmystory,wecamebacktothesameplace.Shewascalmandresolutelypolite.Whenmyvoicehitacertaindecibel(分貝),Iwaspassedalong,likeahot,irritablepotato,toatechnician.“Youdon'thavetheWindowsSetupCD,ma'am,becauseyoudon'tneedit,”heexplainedcheerfully.“Windowscamepreinstalledonyourputer!”“ButIdoneedit.”“Yes,butyoudon'thaveit.”Wewentonlikethisforawhile.,Finally,heofferedtowalkmethroughtheuseofadifferentCD,onethatwoulderasemyentiresystem.“Ofcourse,you'dloseallyoure-mail,yourdocuments,yourphotos.”Itwaslikeofferingtodropasafeonmyheadtocuremyheadache.“Youmightbeabletorecoverthem,butitwouldbeexpensive.”Hesoundeddelighted.“Andit'snotcovetedbythewarranty(產(chǎn)品保證書)!”Thesafebegantoseemlikeagoodidea,provideditwasfull.56.Whydidtheauthorshutdownherputerabruptly?A.Shehadsavedwhatshehadwritten.B.Shecouldn'tmovethecursor.C.Theputerrefusedtowork.D.Theputerofferedtorepairitself.57.Whichofthefollowingistheauthor'sopinionaboutthewomanattheGlobalSupportCentre?A.Shesoundedhelpfulandknowledgeable.B.Shewastheretomakecallersfrustrated.C.Shewasabletosolveherputerproblem.,D.Shewasquicktopassheralongtoatechnician.58.Accordingtothepassage,thesolutionofferedbythetechnicianwas__A.effectiveB.economicalC.unpracticalD.unacceptable59.“Itwaslikeofferingtodropasafeonmyheadtocuremyheadache”inthelastbutoneparagraphmeansthatA.thetechnician'sproposalwouldmakethingsevenworseB.thetechnician'sproposalcouldeventuallysolvetheproblemC.filesstoredonherputerwerelikeasafeD.erasingtheentiresystemwaslikecuringaheadache60.ItcanbeinferredfromthepassagethatthedifferencesbetweentheGlobalSupportCentreandthelocalrepairshoplieinallthefollowingEXCEPTA.efficiencyB.locationC.SetupCDsD.attitudeText2短文賞析本文講述了作者在對自己認(rèn)為非常滿意的一篇文章收尾時，電腦出問題了，之后與全球技術(shù)支持中心的客服聯(lián)絡(luò)的過程。作者認(rèn)為那個女客服一點(diǎn)都不合格，她的解釋只會令人越聽越糊涂。但是接下來女客服把微軟的號碼告訴作者之后，技術(shù)人員的解釋仍然令人費(fèi)解，甚至最后試圖敷衍了事。經(jīng)過一番折騰之后，作者送到附近的小店里維修之后，一切恢復(fù)正常。文章帶有幽默挖苦的意味，以兩個人在同一地點(diǎn)議論同一天氣完畢。答案及解析56.B【解析】第一段中，作者說自己想保存文件，但是光標(biāo)不動了，死機(jī)了。只有把電池拔出強(qiáng)行關(guān)機(jī)，所以排除A，D。c中說電腦回絕工作，不合題意。所以此題應(yīng)選B。57.B【解析】此題是有關(guān)作者態(tài)度的問題。由第5、6段可以看出女客服的答復(fù)令人很不滿，很沮喪。所以此題應(yīng)選B。58.D【解析】此題問技術(shù)員的答復(fù)如何。文章中“ButIdoneedit.”“Yes.butyoudon’thaveit.”Wewentonlikethisforawhile.Fi-nally.heofferedtowalkmethrough...可以看出“技術(shù)員最后是在敷衍作者，沒有提出一個合理的解決方法”。所以此題應(yīng)選D。59.A【解析】“Itwaslikeofferingtodropasafeonmyheadtocuremyheadache.”意為“就像給我提供一個保險箱放我頭上來治愈我的.頭痛一樣?！焙钔诳嗟卣f技術(shù)員提供的建議不可采取。所以此題應(yīng)選A。60.C【解析】由文中可知全球技術(shù)支持中心跟當(dāng)?shù)匦蘩淼甑膮^(qū)別在于，當(dāng)?shù)匦蘩淼晷矢撸攸c(diǎn)近，態(tài)度好。題目問的是除了哪個選項以外，其他都是二者的不同。所以此題應(yīng)選C。全國英語等級考試五級模擬試題精選3篇（三）全國英語等級考試五級閱讀真題演練PartBInthefollowingarticle,someparagraphshavebeenremoved.ForQuestions66to70,choosethemostsuitableparagraphfromthelistA-Ftofitintoeachofthenumberedgaps.Thereisoneparagraphwhichdoesnotfitinanyofthegaps.MarkyouranswersonANSWERSHEET1.Thereareasmanydefinitionsofphilosophyastherearephilosophers--perhapsthereareevenmore.Afterthreemillermiaofphilosophicalactivityanddisagreement,itisunlikelythatwe'llreachconsensus,andIcertainlydon'twanttoaddmorehotairtothevolcaniccloudofunknow-ing.WhatI'dliketodointheopeningcolumninthisnewventureistokickthingsoffbyaskingaslightlydifferentouestion:Whatisaohilosooher?66.SocratestellsthestoryofThales,whowasbysomeaccountsthefirstphilosopher.Hewaslookingsointentlyatthestarsthathefellintoawell.SomewittyThracianservantgirlissaidtohavemadeajokeatThales'expense--thatinhiseagernesstoknowwhatwentonintheskyhewasunawareofthethingsinfrontofhimandathisfeet.Socratesadds,inSethBenardete'stransla-tion,“Thesamejestsufficesforallthosewhoengageinphilosophy.”Whatisaphilosopher,then?Theanswerisclear:alaughingstock,anabsent-mindedbuf-foon,thebuttofcountlessjokesfromAristophanes'“TheClouds”toMelBrooks'“HistoryoftheWorld”,.Wheneverthephilosopherispelledtotalkaboutthethingsathisfeet,hegivesnotonlytheThraciangirlbuttherestofthecrowdabellylaugh.67.ButasalwayswithPlato,thingsarenotnecessarilyastheyfirstappear,andSocratesisthegreatestofironists.First,weshouldrecallthatThalesbelievedthatwaterwastheuniversalsub-stanceoutofwhichallthingswereposed.WaterwasThales'philosophers'stone,asitwere.Therefore,byfallingintoawell,heinadvertentlypresseshisbasicphilosophicalclaim.68.Bycontrast,wemightsay,thephilosopheristhepersonwhohastimeorwhotakestime.Theodorus,Socrates'interlocutor,introducesthe“digression”withthewords,“Aren'tweatleis-ure,Socrates?”Thelatter'sresponseisinteresting.Hesays,“Itappearsweare.”Asweknow,inphilosophyaooearancescanbedeceotive.69.Pushingthisalittlefurther,wemightsaythattophilosophizeistotakeyourtime,evenWhenyouhavenotime,whentimeisconstantlypressingatyourback.ThebusyreadersofTheNewYorkTimeswillunderstandthissentiment.70.Socratessaysthatthoseintheconstantpressofbusiness,likelawyers,policy-makers,mort-gagebrokersandhedgefundmanagers,bee“bentandstunted”andtheyarepelled“todocrookedthings”.Thepettifoggerisundoubtedlysuccessful,wealthyandextraordinarilyhoney-tongued,but,Socratesadds,“smallinhissoulandshrewdandashyster.”Thephilosopher,bycontrast,isfreebyvirtueofhisorherother-worldliness,bytheircapacitytofallintowellsandap-pearsilly.A.Thephilosopher'sclumsinessinworldlyaffairsmakeshimappearstupid,or,“givestheim-pressionofplainsilliness.”WeareleftwitharatherMontyPythonesquedefinitionofthephilosopher:theonewhoissilly.B.Thelawyerispelledtopresentacaseincourtandtimeisoftheessence.InGreeklegalproceedings,astrictlylimitedamountoftimewasallottedforthepresentationofcases.Timewasmeasuredwithawaterclockorclepsydra,whichliterallystealstime,asintheGreekkleptes,athieforembezzler.Thepettifogger,thejury,andbyimplicationthewholesocie-ty,livewiththeconstantpressureoftime.Thewateroftime'sflowisconstantlythreateningtodrownthem.D.ItisourhopethatsomeofthemwillmakethetimetoreadTheStone.AsWittgensteinsays,“Thisishowphilosophersshouldsaluteeachother:'Takeyourtime.'”E.Socratesbelievesthatthephilosopherneitherseesnorhearstheso-calledunwrittenlawsofthecity,thatis,themoresandconventionsthatgovernpubliclife.Thephilosopherwilldis-regardthesocietalriflesgiventoaperson.AsAlfredNorthWhiteheadsaid,philosophyisaseriesoffootnotestoPlato.LetmeriskaddingafootnotebylookingatPlato'sprovocativedefinitionofthephilosopherthatappearsinthemiddleofhisdialogue,“Theaetetus,”inapassagethatsomescholarsconsidera“di-gression”.Butfarfrombeingafootnote