書(shū)面表達(dá)訓(xùn)練(一)

1、書(shū)面表達(dá)訓(xùn)練（一） 某高中部分同學(xué)在校園內(nèi)就“中學(xué)生是否應(yīng)該上網(wǎng)”這一話題進(jìn)行了一次調(diào)查。請(qǐng)根據(jù)下表內(nèi)容寫(xiě)一篇120詞左右的報(bào)導(dǎo)，在?？习l(fā)表。70%30%作者觀點(diǎn)1、 可以了解時(shí)事，拓展視野；2、 可以與朋友聊天、發(fā)e-mail；3、 可以上網(wǎng)校、讀書(shū)、學(xué)外語(yǔ)；4、 可以欣賞音樂(lè)、觀看比賽；1、 中學(xué)生容易沉溺網(wǎng)絡(luò)世界；玩游戲、聊天浪費(fèi)時(shí)間；2、 容易上當(dāng)受騙；3、 影響學(xué)業(yè)成績(jī)。 ？ 注意：1、短文要包含以上全部要點(diǎn)；2、不能直譯要點(diǎn)； 3、短文的開(kāi)頭已經(jīng)寫(xiě)好，不記入總詞數(shù)。 Surf the Internet or Not Lately, it has aroused teachers

2、and parents concern whether middle school students should surf the Internet. A recent survey carried out in our campus received a warm response. 【解題思路】一、 明確寫(xiě)作任務(wù)，確定寫(xiě)作體裁；根據(jù)設(shè)題要求來(lái)看，本次書(shū)面表達(dá)訓(xùn)練屬于控制性與開(kāi)放性結(jié)合的小議論文體，要求考生通過(guò)一篇120詞左右的短文，按表中信息要求闡明對(duì)某一主題正反兩個(gè)方面的論點(diǎn)和論據(jù)，同時(shí)還要對(duì)該主題簡(jiǎn)要發(fā)表自己的看法。這也是高考對(duì)考生篇章層次運(yùn)用語(yǔ)言能力考查的主要形式之一。議論文體要求

3、觀點(diǎn)清楚，論據(jù)充分有力，文字表達(dá)準(zhǔn)確。同時(shí)，要確定短文的基本時(shí)態(tài)：一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)。二、 理清寫(xiě)作思路，確定段落結(jié)構(gòu)；書(shū)面表達(dá)的行文思路通過(guò)文章的段落結(jié)構(gòu)表現(xiàn)。確定段落結(jié)構(gòu)有利于考生在寫(xiě)作中保持清晰的思路，避免思維混亂和行文的隨意性?？忌诤?jiǎn)要分析寫(xiě)作要求之后，要迅速理清思路，確定四個(gè)自然段落。1、 Brief introduction to the survey；(已經(jīng)給出。)2、 Opinions in favor of middle-school students surfing the internet；3、 Opinions to the contrary;4、 Opinions of t

4、he writer.三、 準(zhǔn)備詞匯句型，打好寫(xiě)作腹稿；盡管考試大綱要求考生在30分鐘內(nèi)完成一篇100詞左右的短文。但在實(shí)際答題中，大部分考生因前面答題超時(shí)，在做書(shū)面表達(dá)時(shí)往往沒(méi)有足夠的時(shí)間打草稿、修改然后謄正。所以，對(duì)于考生來(lái)講，在有限的時(shí)間內(nèi)完成一篇高質(zhì)量的作文，利用關(guān)鍵詞和句型打好腹稿就顯得尤為重要。1、 詞匯準(zhǔn)備：according to, do good to, get informed of , current affairs, broad ones horizons, convenient, chat, have access to, go to net-school, devot

5、e to, a waste of time, get addicted to, cheat, worse still, have a bad effect on, personally, play an increasingly important role in, in no case, go to extremes. 2、 句型準(zhǔn)備：hold the view that; it is convenient and cheap that; it seems that ; people insist that; in no case should we do.四、 短文一氣呵成，注意卷面書(shū)寫(xiě)。

6、考生在打好腹稿，或者說(shuō)是口頭作文完成以后，就要盡快完成書(shū)面作文，要一氣呵成，避免在行文中反復(fù)修改。要注意，在正式寫(xiě)作中，即使想到了更好的句子或是更高級(jí)的詞匯，也不要對(duì)已經(jīng)寫(xiě)好的句子或詞語(yǔ)進(jìn)行修改。卷面整潔度影響考生成績(jī)已是不爭(zhēng)的事實(shí)?！緦W(xué)生習(xí)作】 Surf the Internet or Not（首段略） There are 70% of the students agree that middle school students should surf the Internet. They thought students can get a lot of informations acro

7、ss the world, which can widen their outlook. Besides, it has become convenient to talk with friends on line. Whats more, students can send e-mail, listen music, and watch sports games through the Internet. Some students can go to net-school, read books or learn foreign language. However, there are 3

8、0% of the students disagree it. They thought students should make every effort to improve their studies. In their view, it is a waste of time to chat or play computer games on line. Some even get cheating on the net. Many students have become addicted to the Internet and fallen behind in their lesso

9、ns. We think middle school students shouldnt be banned from surfing the Internet. However, everything has its limits. So dont go too far on the Internet.【習(xí)作點(diǎn)評(píng)】1、 從篇章結(jié)構(gòu)看，習(xí)作思路清晰，段落結(jié)構(gòu)合理。三個(gè)自然段分別闡述了支持方、反對(duì)方和作者自己的觀點(diǎn)。2、 從句子結(jié)構(gòu)看，絕大部分句子結(jié)構(gòu)準(zhǔn)確。句子間的過(guò)渡詞使用也很到位，如besides, whats more, however, in their view等。但仍有少數(shù)句子結(jié)構(gòu)錯(cuò)

10、誤。如兩處?！皌here be”句型是大部分學(xué)生在寫(xiě)作中容易犯結(jié)構(gòu)錯(cuò)誤的地方，特別是主語(yǔ)后的非謂語(yǔ)動(dòng)詞使用錯(cuò)誤較為普遍。此句修改見(jiàn)下條。3、 從詞匯使用上看，習(xí)作運(yùn)用了較多的詞匯和短語(yǔ)，如 widen ones outlook, convenient, on line, make every effort to do sth, become addicted to sth, fall behind等。但在下列地方出現(xiàn)了語(yǔ)用失誤或錯(cuò)誤：和 兩處均出現(xiàn)句子結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯運(yùn)用錯(cuò)誤?！皌here be”句型中謂語(yǔ)動(dòng)詞就是be，其后跟的是該句型的主語(yǔ)。所以，此句中主語(yǔ)后不能使用謂語(yǔ)動(dòng)詞形式；同時(shí)，表示贊同與

11、反對(duì)時(shí)，不能使用agree 和disagree, 這種語(yǔ)用失誤也是學(xué)生習(xí)作中普遍存在的。處應(yīng)改為T(mén)here are 70% of the students who favor that school students should surf the Internet. 或 70% of the students favor that ；處應(yīng)改為 , there are 30% of the students who believe middle school students shouldnt surf the Internet. 或 30% of the students believe ；

12、 和兩處同屬時(shí)態(tài)錯(cuò)誤。盡管調(diào)查這件事是過(guò)去事件，但同學(xué)們的看法依然是現(xiàn)在存在的，所以應(yīng)使用一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)，改為think；屬名詞使用錯(cuò)誤。Information是不可數(shù)名詞，不能使用復(fù)數(shù)形式；屬于固定短語(yǔ)使用錯(cuò)誤。listen 是不及物動(dòng)詞，其后跟介詞to帶賓語(yǔ)。所以應(yīng)改為 listen to music; 屬名詞使用錯(cuò)誤。language 是可數(shù)名詞，建議改為a foreign language 或 foreign languages； 屬及物動(dòng)詞使用錯(cuò)誤。此句中應(yīng)表示中學(xué)生上當(dāng)受騙，應(yīng)用被動(dòng)結(jié)構(gòu)。get cheating應(yīng)改為get cheated.結(jié)合全文的結(jié)構(gòu)和語(yǔ)言使用來(lái)評(píng)判，該習(xí)作得分1

13、7-19?！緟⒖即鸢浮?Surf the Internet or Not Lately, it has aroused teachers and parents concern whether middle school students should surf the Internet. A recent survey carried out in our campus received a warm response. According to the survey, some 70% of the students hold the view that surfing the Inter

14、net does good to middle school students. They think that students can get informed of current affairs at home and abroad through the Internet, which broadens their horizons. And it is so convenient and cheap to chat with friends or send e-mail to them. Beside, students can have access to enjoying mu

15、sic or sports games on the Internet. In their eyes, the Internet also helps students with their lessons. Students can read e-books, learn foreign languages or even go to net-school. However, about 30% insist that middle school students shouldnt surf the Internet. In their opinion, students should devote themselves to study and surfing the Internet is a waste of time. Besides, students seem to easily get addicted to the Internet or cheated. Worse still,