專(zhuān)八作文講解 3

1、 優(yōu)秀專(zhuān)八作文標(biāo)準(zhǔn)文章力求做到觀(guān)點(diǎn)清楚、例證充分、結(jié)構(gòu)嚴(yán)謹(jǐn)、層次清楚、合乎邏輯、語(yǔ)言得體、無(wú)重大語(yǔ)法錯(cuò)誤。要想寫(xiě)好一篇文章，考生應(yīng)該注意以下幾點(diǎn)： 卷面 結(jié)構(gòu) 表達(dá) 行文的統(tǒng)一性和連貫性 語(yǔ)言的規(guī)范性和準(zhǔn)確性經(jīng)常犯的錯(cuò)誤： 概括起來(lái)有以下幾點(diǎn)： l）作文中的論點(diǎn)未展開(kāi)。 2）作文結(jié)構(gòu)不嚴(yán)謹(jǐn)，段落沒(méi)有主題句，且句際段落關(guān)系不明顯。 3）作文首尾不一致。作文開(kāi)頭與結(jié)尾部分內(nèi)容銜接不上，或自相矛盾。 4）作文缺乏連貫性攻略很多學(xué)習(xí)者翻開(kāi)作文書(shū)籍，就如同想打開(kāi)一本武功秘籍，只希望看到5個(gè)字母trick(技巧) 。技巧固然十分重要，但在應(yīng)試準(zhǔn)備中，常常需要70%的基礎(chǔ)和30%的技巧。這里要提醒大家的是，

2、不可高估技巧的作用，猶如在武打片中，要想得到某某寶典和劍法，是需要付出慘痛的代價(jià)的。 一. 消除漢式英語(yǔ)： 漢式英語(yǔ)(Chinglish)是受漢語(yǔ)語(yǔ)言模式或思維模式影響而產(chǎn)生的不地道的英語(yǔ)。英語(yǔ)專(zhuān)業(yè)學(xué)生(尤其是基礎(chǔ)階段的學(xué)生)的英語(yǔ)習(xí)作中常常會(huì)出現(xiàn)許多漢式英語(yǔ)。這些漢式英語(yǔ)的表現(xiàn)形式各異，大都削弱了書(shū)面交際的效果，有些甚至嚴(yán)重地影響了書(shū)面交際的順利進(jìn)行。因此，我們有必要對(duì)其產(chǎn)生的原因作出分析，然后制訂相應(yīng)的對(duì)策以幫助學(xué)生在英語(yǔ)寫(xiě)作中盡可能地減少或避免漢式英語(yǔ)的出現(xiàn)。 1.1 詞匯層面的漢式英語(yǔ) 例如在一篇題為“My favorite cat”的習(xí)作中，某位學(xué)生想說(shuō)他家里養(yǎng)了一只可愛(ài)的貓，于是他

3、寫(xiě)道“My home raises a lovely cat.”這完全是英漢詞匯的“對(duì)號(hào)入座”。另一名學(xué)生在一篇題為“My beloved campus”的習(xí)作中有的同學(xué)把“落后”與“backward”等同起來(lái)，在表達(dá)“我要加倍努力,否則就要落后”時(shí)，寫(xiě)成“I should work much harder, otherwise, I would be backward.”而這句里的“落后”應(yīng)為“l(fā)ag behind”或“fall behind”才對(duì)。只有在“經(jīng)濟(jì)落后”或“地區(qū)落后”的情況下才用“backward”。類(lèi)似的例子不勝枚舉。 1.2 慣用短語(yǔ)層面的漢式英語(yǔ) 慣用短語(yǔ)層面的漢式英語(yǔ)主

4、要表現(xiàn)為兩類(lèi)：一是在應(yīng)該用某個(gè)英語(yǔ)的慣用短語(yǔ)來(lái)表達(dá)一個(gè)語(yǔ)義單位時(shí)沒(méi)有用，而是將漢語(yǔ)的慣用短語(yǔ)生搬硬套地逐詞翻譯出來(lái)；二是誤用意思貌似的另外一個(gè)英語(yǔ)慣用短語(yǔ)。如某位同學(xué)在習(xí)作“the day I was admitted by collage”對(duì)自己未能進(jìn)入理想的大學(xué)學(xué)習(xí)而遺憾的同時(shí)，鼓勵(lì)自己“不管怎么說(shuō),我已經(jīng)是一名大學(xué)生了”。她的英文表達(dá)為“No matter how to say, I am already a collage student.”完全是逐詞對(duì)譯，并不能表達(dá)“不管怎么說(shuō)”這種讓步關(guān)系。地道的英語(yǔ)應(yīng)該是“Anyway, I am already a collage studen

5、t.” 另一個(gè)同學(xué)在同樣題目的習(xí)作中，在歷數(shù)了高考沒(méi)發(fā)揮好的幾個(gè)原因后說(shuō)“你們可不要學(xué)我”時(shí)，英文表達(dá)為“Never learn from me.”這里“l(fā)earn from sb”“學(xué)某某”一般是指向好的榜樣學(xué)習(xí)，而習(xí)作者想表達(dá)的是“吸取教訓(xùn)”，故地道的英語(yǔ)說(shuō)法應(yīng)該是：“Dont follow my example.”有的同學(xué)更是把“昨天我們玩得很愉快”寫(xiě)成“We played very happily yesterday.”指“度過(guò)了一段愉快的時(shí)光”，英語(yǔ)的習(xí)慣用法是“We had a good time yesterday.” 1.3 句子層面的漢式英語(yǔ)例如,有同學(xué)將“不知不覺(jué),期末考試

6、已經(jīng)來(lái)臨了”寫(xiě)成“I didnt know the final examination had fallen.”“不知不覺(jué)”的含義是起先不知道，后來(lái)覺(jué)察到了，而不是根本不知道。因此，原句應(yīng)改為“The final examination came before I realized it.” CE指漢式英語(yǔ)，IE為地道英語(yǔ)或規(guī)范英語(yǔ)。 (1) My study was very busy at that time. (CE) I was very busy with my study at that time. (IE) (2) His age is very young. (CE) He i

7、s very young. (IE) (3) My exam didnt pass. (CE) I failed in the exam. (IE) (4) My study was very much better than that of hers. (CE) I did much better than she did in study. (IE) (5) Today is Sunday. (CE) It is Sunday today. (IE)1.4 語(yǔ)篇層面的漢式英語(yǔ)學(xué)生習(xí)作中語(yǔ)篇層面的漢式英語(yǔ)較為復(fù)雜，突出地表現(xiàn)在以下3個(gè)方面.1.4.1 學(xué)生不習(xí)慣英語(yǔ)篇章及段落的寫(xiě)作模式。英語(yǔ)

8、文章習(xí)慣于把重要的思想放在首段，而段落的主要意思放在首句，即文章首段應(yīng)該有篇題句(thesis statement)，段落首句應(yīng)該是主題句(Topic sentence)。這樣文章會(huì)開(kāi)門(mén)見(jiàn)山，一語(yǔ)破的，而后用細(xì)節(jié)逐層闡述篇題句和主題句。中國(guó)學(xué)生受漢語(yǔ)散文的“形散而神不散”影響，在英語(yǔ)寫(xiě)作時(shí)段落一般都缺少主題句，整篇文章沒(méi)有篇題句，因而他們的英語(yǔ)文章段落結(jié)構(gòu)較為松散，邏輯性不強(qiáng)，缺乏連貫性和整體性，文章中心不突出。1.4.2 學(xué)生寫(xiě)作時(shí)沒(méi)有意識(shí)到英語(yǔ)語(yǔ)言高度“形合”的特點(diǎn)。他們所寫(xiě)段落中常常缺乏必要的銜接手段，比如句與句之間沒(méi)有過(guò)渡性的連接副詞或介詞短語(yǔ)等，是并列或主從句的小句之間卻沒(méi)有并列或從

9、屬連詞，因而常常出現(xiàn)一逗到底的粘連句(run-on sentences)。 1.4.3 在某一特定文體的寫(xiě)作時(shí)，學(xué)生會(huì)不自覺(jué)地套用漢語(yǔ)的思路，結(jié)果出現(xiàn)不倫不類(lèi)的英語(yǔ)段落。下面是某同學(xué)的書(shū)信習(xí)作中的一個(gè)片段： I havent received your letter for a long time. How are your conditions? Is your work busy? Please reply me early. Life here is very nervous becaused we dont have enough time. The teacher gives us

10、too many exercises, so we cant read when class is over. We have no method. 試修改如下： It is a long time since I received your last letter. How are you getting on recently? Are you busy with your work? Hope to hear from you soon. Weve been hard pressed for time. Our teachers are always assigning so much

11、homework that we can hardly have any time for our out side reading. We have no way out. 寫(xiě)作中文章句式多樣化的具體方法：1. 改變句子開(kāi)頭 許多學(xué)生在寫(xiě)作中傾向于用與人有關(guān)系的詞性，用名詞和代詞作為句子的開(kāi)頭，如 People，We，I，He，They，She等。但這種開(kāi)頭見(jiàn)多了，難免讓人厭倦。 試比較： A. People throughout the country have greatly demanded all kinds of nutritious food. B .There is a gre

12、at demand across the country for all kinds of nutritious food. 第一句改用非人稱(chēng)名詞作為主語(yǔ)開(kāi)頭，第二句則用there be句型開(kāi)頭。這樣既改變了主語(yǔ)謂語(yǔ)賓語(yǔ)單調(diào)句型，又把想強(qiáng)調(diào)的意思突出出來(lái)。 為了把文章寫(xiě)得生動(dòng)活潑，除了用主語(yǔ)開(kāi)頭外，還可以用句子的其他成分開(kāi)頭。 用副詞開(kāi)頭 Too often，students stray into the habit of cheating on tests. 用同位語(yǔ)開(kāi)頭 Air，water and oxygen，everything that is necessary for life.

13、用狀語(yǔ)開(kāi)頭 Dark and empty，the house looked very different from the way I remembered it. 用表語(yǔ)開(kāi)頭 Equally essential to the highest success in learning a language are intense interest plus persistent effort. 用賓語(yǔ)開(kāi)頭 My advice you would not listen to；my helps you laughed at. Now you will have what you asked for.

14、 以短語(yǔ)修飾語(yǔ)開(kāi)頭 A. 以介詞短語(yǔ)開(kāi)頭 To me the news was very interesting，but to my wife very boring. B. 以分詞短語(yǔ)開(kāi)頭 Disturbed by the discord of American life in recent decades，Menchester took flight for the pacific islands. C. 以不定式短語(yǔ)開(kāi)頭 To pass the exam，you should work very hard. 2. 巧用連接詞 有的學(xué)生在作文中使用過(guò)多簡(jiǎn)單句，成了簡(jiǎn)單句堆砌；有的寫(xiě)復(fù)雜句時(shí)

15、，動(dòng)輒用so， and，then，but，or，however，yet等非但達(dá)不到豐富表達(dá)方式的目的，反而使句子結(jié)構(gòu)松散、呆板。為了避免這種現(xiàn)象，可以通過(guò)使用連接詞，尤其是一些表示從屬關(guān)系的連接詞，如 who，which，that，because，since，although，after，as，before，when，whenever，if，unless，as if等，不僅能夠豐富句型，而且還能夠把思想表達(dá)得更清楚，意義更連貫。 例如： Natural resources are very limited. They will be exhausted in the near future.

16、It is not true. But it becomes a major concern around the world. This is a widely accepted fact. 這段文字用簡(jiǎn)單句表達(dá)，它們之間內(nèi)在的邏輯關(guān)系含糊不清，意思支離破碎。如果使用連接詞，將單句與其前后合并，形成主次關(guān)系，就把一個(gè)比較復(fù)雜的內(nèi)容和關(guān)系表達(dá)得層次清楚、結(jié)構(gòu)嚴(yán)謹(jǐn)。例如： It is a widely accepted fact that there is a major concern around the world for the exhaustion of limited natural

17、 resources in the near future，though it is unlikely to be true. 再如： The Mississippi River is one of the longest rivers in the world，and in spring time it often overflows its banks，and the lives of many people are endangered. 此句用and把三個(gè)分句一貫到底，既乏味又可笑。如果使用了關(guān)系代詞which，語(yǔ)義就會(huì)更連貫，語(yǔ)言也會(huì)更流暢： The Mississippi Rive

18、r，which is one of the longest rivers in the world，often overflows its banks in the spring time，endangering the lives of many people. 3. 長(zhǎng)短句交插 長(zhǎng)句和短句各有其優(yōu)點(diǎn)和缺點(diǎn)。長(zhǎng)句，因?yàn)槭褂玫亩ㄕZ(yǔ)、狀語(yǔ)較多，限制了概念的外延，增大了概念的內(nèi)涵，所以比較精確、嚴(yán)密，但使用起來(lái)不夠活潑簡(jiǎn)便。短句，由于字?jǐn)?shù)少，直截了當(dāng)，一般比較簡(jiǎn)潔、明快、有力，但不利于表達(dá)復(fù)雜的語(yǔ)義內(nèi)容。在具體語(yǔ)言活動(dòng)中，最好長(zhǎng)短句交替使用。這既體現(xiàn)了節(jié)奏上的要求，也是意義上的需要。例如： （1）

19、We can imagine the beautiful surroundings.（2）There are many trees along the streets.（3）There is a clean river in the city.（4） There are many fishes in the river.（5）There are willow trees on the one side.（6）There are some pieces of grassland on the other side.（7）There are many flowers on them. 下面是修改后

20、的段落： （1）Just imagine the beautiful surroundings if we make our cities greener.（2）Green trees line the streets.（3）A clean river winds through the city，in which a lot of fishes abound.（4）On the one side stand rows of willow trees.（5）On the other side lies a stretch of grassland sprinkled with many yel

21、low and red flowers. 4. 利用倒裝結(jié)構(gòu) 英語(yǔ)的基本句型是SVO，如果偶爾打破常規(guī)，改變某一成分的位置，不僅可以豐富句型，而且能強(qiáng)調(diào)、突出被倒裝的部分，收到意想不到的表達(dá)效果。例如： 1）In no other place in the world can one find such enthusiasm for applying for hosting the 2008 Olympic Games. 2）Faith in the Chinese economic reforms the majority of people will never lose. 四. 增強(qiáng)英語(yǔ)

22、語(yǔ)句表現(xiàn)力的有效方法 1. 避免使用語(yǔ)意弱的“be”動(dòng)詞。 A. 把句中的表語(yǔ)轉(zhuǎn)換為不同的修飾語(yǔ)。例如： Weak: The trees are bare. The grass is brown. The landscape seems drab. Revision:The brown grass and bare trees form a drab landscape. （轉(zhuǎn)換為前置定語(yǔ)） Or: The landscape, bare and brown, begged for spring green. （轉(zhuǎn)換為并列結(jié)構(gòu)作后置定語(yǔ)） B. 將作表語(yǔ)用的形容詞或名詞變?yōu)樾袨閯?dòng)詞。例如： 1

23、） Weak: The team members are good players. Revision: The team members play well. 2） Weak: One workers plan is the elimination of tardiness. Revision: One workers plan eliminates tardiness. 3）在以“here”或“there”開(kāi)頭的句子中，把“be”動(dòng)詞后的名詞代詞變成句子的主語(yǔ)。例如： * Weak: There is no opportunity for promotion. Revision: No o

24、pportunity for promotion exists. * Weak: Here are the books you ordered. Revision: The books you ordered have arrived. 2. 多用語(yǔ)意具體的動(dòng)詞，保持句意簡(jiǎn)潔明了。例如： A. Poor: My supervisor went past my desk. Better: My supervisor sauntered （=walked slowly） past my desk. B. Poor: She is a careful shopper. Better: She com

25、pares prices and quality. 3. 防止使用語(yǔ)意冗長(zhǎng)累贅的詞語(yǔ)。例如： A. Wordy: My little sister has a preference for chocolate milk. Improved: My little sister prefers chocolate milk. B. Wordy: We are in receipt of your letter and intend to follow your recommendations. Improved: We have received your letter and intend to

26、 follow your recommendations. 4. 用抽象名詞作句子中心（主語(yǔ)）： The rapid expansion of urban areas has in many cases encroached on valuable cultivatable land, and led to a general recognition that development must not be carried at the cost of agriculture. The government has attached greater importance to the prob

27、lem and an increasing number of redundant projects are being terminated. 五.注意巧妙運(yùn)用英語(yǔ)寫(xiě)作結(jié)構(gòu)及用語(yǔ)： 1. 文章開(kāi)頭句型 1-1 對(duì)立法: 先引出其他人的不同看法, 然后提出自己的看法或者偏向于某一看法, 適用于有爭(zhēng)議性的主題. e.g. When asked about., the vast/overwhelming majority of people say that . But I think/view a bit differently. . When it comes to ., some peopl

28、e believe that . Others argue/claim that the opposite/reverse is true. There is probably some truth in both arguments/statements, but (I tend to the prefer/latter .)1-2 現(xiàn)象法：引出要剖析的現(xiàn)象或者問(wèn)題, 然后評(píng)論.e.g Recently the rise in problem of / (phenomenon of) . has cause/aroused public/ popular/ wide/ worldwide c

29、oncern. 1-3 觀(guān)點(diǎn)法：開(kāi)門(mén)見(jiàn)山, 直接了當(dāng)?shù)靥岢鲎约簩?duì)要討論的問(wèn)題的看法.e.g: Never in history has the change of . been as evident as .Nowhere in the world/China has the issue/ idea of . been more visible/popular than. Now people in growing/significant numbers are beginning/coming to realize/accept/(be aware) that. 1-4 引用法：先引出名人名言或者有代表性的看法, 來(lái)引出文章要展開(kāi)論述的觀(guān)點(diǎn)!e.g: Knowledge is power. such is the remark made by Bacon. This remark has been shared by more and more people . Education is not complete with graduation. Such is the opinion of a great American philosopher. Now more and more people share his opinion. 1-5 比較法：通過(guò)對(duì)過(guò)去,現(xiàn)在 兩種