作家談年輕父母教育子女問題（The writer talks about the problems of young parents educating their children）

1、作家談年輕父母教育子女問題The writer talks about the problems of young parents educating their childrenThis paper consists of 286847400 contributionsDOC documents may experience poor browsing on the WAP side. It is recommended that you first select TXT, or download the source file to the local view.Writers talk

2、about young parents educating their children: premature competition, writers talking about young parents, educating their children, premature competition, influencing growthHttp:/ sina 2021 06, 01, 04:23 China Youth DailyMay 27th, Zhejiang, Zhoushan early childhood education center held a "61&q

3、uot; parent-child garden activities. Wu Linhong photoThe author teaches and takes photos with the students in the Ningxia rural women teachers' training courseYinThe author exchanges with young parentsEditor's note: editor's note: today is international children's day. We invite the

4、reader to examine for this festival a perspective. Just like the birthday as "mother", is the connotation of gratitude for the joy to add; children's day as "parents day" - especially for young parents, it means looking for the foundation for children happy and happy life. Wh

5、at do parents and families mean to children and what responsibilities should they bear? "Good mother is better than good teacher" author Yin Jianli, has been concerned about the younger generation of Chinese parents may face problems, especially the "70 after" and "80"

6、parents. Our special issue sends her a long article, the paper said: I hope young parents should be aware of their "education" role, should be a self enlightenment. Birth separation - the act of resisting nature must bear the cost of separation - the act of resisting nature has its price -

7、 let me begin with a true and typical example.One of my nephews was born in 1982 and worked in a family in Beijing after graduating from college. His child has just passed his first birthday, and will soon be taken home by grandma. The reason is that their house is not large, a few people crowded in

8、 a narrow space for a long time, the psychological pressure is relatively large. In addition, the child's grandfather, a person in his hometown, life without care for a long time, but also a problem. As the "80" couple, have realized a long time did not see the child is not good, but b

9、ecause of the reality, they have to compromise. One family finally agreed on the plan, grandmother took the children back home, every month to Beijing for a month, this alternating with two runs, although grandma something hard, but can ensure that children have half the time every day to see my par

10、ents. Overall, it should be said is a "win-win" approach. In recent years, I have met many parents in my life and work, and found that the problems or problems that parents are facing are more concentrated. How to solve the problem of separation from children should be the first confusion

11、they encounter. In this regard, it should be said that "80" than "after 70" feeling more strongly. I think this confusion is actually a good thing. It means that the younger generation is becoming more aware of the importance of getting along with children, and no longer simply &

12、quot;living" and "raising". This may be due to parents to learn more and more conscious, from the quality of parents and the level of speaking, is a generation more powerful than the generation. A few days ago, the media reports about the "labor shortage" problem, in previou

13、s years, migrant workers can not find a job in the city, and now is the city enterprises can not recruit workers. Media analysis of several reasons, one of which is, "80" generation has become parents, they saw a large area of rural left behind children's problems, do not want to let t

14、heir children become left behind children. They have become more aware of the fact that it is a bit of a waste of money to stay away from home and to delay the education of their children. A psychologist in the United States used macaque monkeys for a famous psychological experiment. He isolated som

15、e young macaques from his mother and installed two "false mothers" in his cage". One mother made of hard wire, a bottle on the chest,Another mother with a soft cloth wrapped, but no milk. According to the common sense of "milk is mother", the little monkey should be more clo

16、se to the "mother" with milk. The fact is otherwise, the little monkey just when hungry, just close to the wire, mother, once finished eating milk, returned to the flannelette mother here. This detail allows us to see the natural desire and fear of infants and young children. Their warm at

17、tachment and need even exceed food. The experiment has not ended yet, and the monkeys have shown a wide variety of psychological disorders when they are adults. The researchers put them and some milk, normal grew up in the mother's arms monkey put together, who did not get normal maternal normal

18、 rhesus monkeys can not integrate into the collective life, most aloof, not mating or refusing to mate. The staff let these traumatized females pregnant by artificial way, to their children after birth, the mother monkey monkey of cold and ruthless and cruel, some small monkeys, and even killed thei

19、r children. Rhesus monkeys and humans are genetically similar to each other, and are reflected in 94% of the earliest human emotional states. The experiment shows that a warm embrace, loving eyes, soft words, and a blind date are indispensable to the normal growth of an intelligent life. The evoluti

20、on of nature is profound. Let us think about why men's fertility can be maintained to sixty or seventy or even eighty, while women's reproductive ability can only be about 50 years old This state of affairs is to ensure that after a child is born, his mother will have enough to support him f

21、or the rest of his life. When a child loses his father, he loses the whole world; if he loses his mother, he loses the whole world. There is a saying "the official folk China, die die father, beg Niang", this is many people summed up a kind of helpless but reasonable choice.Father can not

22、take care of mother, not to mention grandpa and grandma! Now there is a situation, some parents because of conditions or concept, early to send their children into the boarding kindergarten, a week to see a child. In many rural areas, in recent years, "school consolidation" movement has be

23、en combined with kindergartens, primary schools and secondary schools, which has led to a large number of young children who have to live in a boarding house early. These circumstances can lead to some subsequent education problems. Leaving a child early in the family and throwing him into a collect

24、ive life can cause emotional damage in early childhood. Even good school education can hardly compensate for the lack of early spiritual development, and ultimately, anti - nature will pay the price. "70 generations" of this generation of parents, many have begun to taste the "left be

25、hind children in rural areas" and "urban foster children" brought about by the evil consequences". They have as a warning, a younger generation of parents and children have to consciously avoid separation, and put the children as a part of "early education". Many parent

26、s have made painful and rational choices when they bring up children and their careers. For example, some mothers, in order to accompany young children to grow up, give up the doctorate or work abroad opportunities; some mothers in order to extend breast-feeding period, rather give up high-income po

27、sitions. This is a new value orientation of family education. This is a positive signal, but with such a positive awareness does not mean conditions. There are indeed many young parents who have no trouble getting along with their children. For example, women in the workplace tend to work as much as

28、 men, and the mother's role requires her to have more opportunities to get along with her children. This is the first dilemma for young parents, and it is a universal social problem. Competition Anxiety - childhood competition; few winners; Competition Anxiety - childhood competition; few winner

29、s; now young parents are generally anxious; these anxieties can be very much the same. Such as,Can I provide good living conditions and good education for my children? Do I have the ability to develop a competitive child? In this way, it will involve a lot of specific confusion: other children's

30、 four months on the early childhood class, I want to take the children to go? How to choose a good kindergarten, how to choose a primary school, how to go to a good middle school, how to help children get the success of the college entrance examination, how to let the children find a good job. "

31、;70 after" and "80", two generations are growing up in the competition, and still survive in the competition. Most of them do not have an economic sense of security and have a strong incentive to succeed. Therefore, the sense of competition has been strengthened for their internality,

32、 and this "nature" will migrate to the education of their children. Coupled with the school created a competitive environment, social advocacy of competitive culture, "lead children to work hard" has become a subconscious mentality to bring up their next generation. Life is not w

33、ithout competition at all. We do not deny the sense of achievement that competition brings to people, and it can promote social progress. But from an educational point of view, the competition must hold two degrees, one is psychological level, one is the age dimension. The former is "moderate&q

34、uot; competition is good, do not "lose" the latter said that not all ages are suitable to participate in the competition, the elderly and children should not compete in life. Because they are vulnerable people, the body energy itself is very small, competition, energy consumption, in the e

35、lderly will accelerate the decline, for children, it will affect their normal growth. The competition for the elderly is not a problem now, and the issue of child competition is very prominent. Parents put their own competitive psychological and stress on the children, the children from kindergarten

36、 began to enter the arena, to cultural classes, began to have homework, than who listen to, better than who do well. Go to elementary school,Middle school, dominated by examinations and numerous competitions, almost control school life. There are so many anti child psychology and anti education affa

37、irs! According to social psychology, competition is one of the important sources of frustration. Philosopher Nitzsch said, "competition produces dissatisfaction with itself.". Anyone who is not satisfied with himself is ready to take revenge." To be sure, the vast majority of competit

38、ion for most children do not help, even if the certificate is obtained, it often lurks behind the long damage. Children who grow up in a competitive climate and are forced into the competition track are more likely to suffer from powerlessness, inferiority complex and psychological imbalances - comp

39、etition that begins in childhood and few winners. Parental power - the most subtle and sharpest knife, the parent power - the most subtle and sharpest knife - I want to say is the third puzzle. It is often overlooked or misread, so it has not attracted attention. But from my years of research, this

40、is one of the most pressing and deeply affecting issues, which is "parental power"". At this point, I feel that we must talk about the "70 after" and "after 80" these two generations. The difference is that "70 after" themselves play the power of parents,

41、 "80" because of the identity of the only child and the child is still small, and other reasons, even if now grown up to become parents, still "power" object. "After 70" was born at the end of the cultural revolution before and after their adolescence, is the rapid tran

42、sformation of China society period, market awareness Pumianerlai, quickly created a generation of people's way of thinking; at the same time, their educational level and higher than hitherto unknown predecessors. They are confident of their ability to educate their children, but the scientific a

43、nd democratic awareness of education has not yet become widespread. So this generation often treats children in a business, social, or technical way. For example, the children sent to boarding schools, requiring children to get excellent test results, strict requirements of children in all aspects,

44、parents are always strict opinions of all aspects of children,Children are strictly required in every respect. In short, it's very strong in life. The essence of parental power is the deprivation of children's free will, right. In short, it's very strong in life. The essence of "par

45、ental power" is the deprivation of children's free will,. In short, the direct result is the child's cowardice, rebellious, no ambition, and so on. The direct result is the child's cowardice, rebellious, no ambition and so on. Over the years, when it comes to the widespread problems

46、 of children, children are said to be spoiled. Over the years, when it comes to the widespread problems of children, children are said to be spoiled. In fact, this is a kind of wrong induction. This kind of error induction has been deeply rooted in the hearts of the people for a long time, and it ha

47、s been a mistake for parents to delay asking questions. This kind of error induction has been deeply rooted in the hearts of the people for a long time. The crux of the problem is even more wrong. For example, some people in order not to spoil, more stringent requirements for children, the crux of t

48、he problem, or even wrong, plus wrong, more forward. For example, some people in order not to spoil, even more demanding children, and even beat and scold children. Of course, the result of this is affirmative, that is, the child is more unhappy. Beat and scold a child. Of course, the result of this

49、 is affirmative, that is, the child is more unhappy. In fact, as long as the normal love, give the child no more, will not love the child bad, because there is no love, there is no healthy growth. If some of the "love" will make children worse, it certainly is not "love", but is

50、wearing a coat of love "over tube" system". Such as small to eat, big to what extracurricular class or choose what major, parents want children to follow their own ideas. Such as small to eat, big to what extracurricular class or choose what major, parents want children to follow thei

51、r own ideas. "Listening" is still our core aesthetic mentality in educating children. People say that the "421" family pattern has problems and disobedience is still our core aesthetic mentality in educating children. People say, "421" family structure is a problem, wro

52、ng, there is a problem, but the problem is not that children are loved too much, but freedom is too little. A few adults manage a child. There is a problem with the family, but the problem is not that the child is loved too much, but that there is too little freedom. A few adults manage a child, lon

53、g if you say "no" and "strong", how many ropes must be tied on the child? A rope too many children bundled, long if you say how strong, how many ropes tied to the child? How can a happy, healthy and promising child be a bundle of children with too many ropes?! What could be a hap

54、py, healthy and promising child?! The two words "freedom" have not become common in our education, and the public still has too many misunderstandings about it. When I spoke to the question of freedom of children in different occasions, always suffered questioned and challenged people to f

55、reedom as "let things drift" or "lawless". It shows how naive our understanding of freedom is. Freedom and respect are the two sides of a coin. When the whole society is talking about respecting children, there is a blind spot in the concept of freedomIn fact, it has become an em

56、pty talk. So young parents should come to the enlightenment, understand the freedom, and reevaluate the value of freedom in education. Understanding how valuable the free will of man is in education, and in the mind of the parents, will set off a "go to power movement", which is not only t

57、he progress of the parents, but also the progress of the whole society, education and culture. While 80 parents, age difference mentioned above and based on their learning consciousness is stronger; or because of their young children, the problem is not in the power of this generation of parents is

58、highlighted. But they must face the strength of their parents. Because the vast majority of this generation is the only child,The relationship between Chinese education and all other disciplines of education is the relationship between orchard and fruit trees, and we are now only when an ordinary Ch

59、inese and isolated fruit to treat, did not see it on other trees, and even the whole fruit is said to the Chinese education in the serious damage to national quality, I think this sentence a little too much. The influence of garden state. And now the basic education management problem, the most acut

60、e is the education equity. This problem has been noisy for many years, but the unfair phenomenon actually intensified. In fact, the "unfair education" is a more false target, the real driving force behind is the greed of human nature and the market is reflected in its use unscrupulous divi

61、sive tactics, people's quality problem. To explore some of the issues of education, education can not only stay in the box, is closely related to education and society, each of its tentacles will extend into the social life of the corner, solve a problem often pull the turnip with mud. Some of these problems can be solved through change. Some can only be handed over to time and given to the future. One way out: not more western, one way out: not more western, but return to tradition of excellence in the current