Sex and the City《欲望都市（1998）》第一季第三集完整中英文對照劇本

“已婚者的光環(huán)”住在紐約這種城市大家最喜歡做的事情之一OneofthebestthingsaboutlivinginacitylikeNewYork就是逃離它isleavingit.我的朋友佩萱絲和她先生Myfriend,Patienceandherhusband邀請我到漢普頓度周末invitedmeouttotheHamptonsfortheweekend.佩萱絲和彼得是完美的一對PatienceandPeterweretheperfectmarriedcouple.他們風(fēng)趣聰明Theywerefun,smart,而且像杰克魯服飾目錄上的模特兒andtheylookedliketheyfelloutofaJ.Crewcatalog.若他們不是住在海邊的別♥墅♥Iftheirhousewasn'trightonthebeach,我一定會討厭他們Iwouldhavehatedthem.他進(jìn)了計(jì)程車然后靠過來坐在我身邊Sohegetsinthecabandheslidesupnexttome.然后呢？Yes?我們打得火熱Anditishot.從漢普頓和西百老匯街口一直到七十二街和麥迪遜大道ItishotallthewayfromHoustonandWestBroadwayto72ndandMadison.來漢普頓做客的人晚餐前得和主人閑話家常Hamptonhouseguestsarealwaysrequiredtosingfortheirsupper.股票經(jīng)濟(jì)人提供理財(cái)方案Brokersgiveinvestmentadvice,建筑師則給與設(shè)計(jì)的意見architects；designadvice,單身朋友則將艷遇之類的事告訴已婚友人singlepeoplegivemarriedfriendstidbitsfromtheirsexualescapades.次日早晨我醒來時覺得神清氣爽ThenextmorningIwokeupfeelingrestedandfabulous.等不及到戶外欣賞美麗風(fēng)景Icouldn'twaittogooutandtakeinthespectacularview.早安Morning.We'dloveto.那天晚上米蘭達(dá)對我大吐苦水Laterthatnight,Mirandagavemethelowdownonherday.你想這是因?yàn)樗麄円詾槟銈兪且粚?？Soyouthinkit'sjustbecausetheythinkthatyou'reinacouple?我知道兩年以來Iknowit.Tvebeenwiththefirmfortwoyears.我們鮮少交談He'sbarelyevenspokentome.他卻突然要我叫他“契普”Allofasudden,it's"Chip."一個名叫契普的律師令人不由得喜歡他AlawyernamedChip,gottalovethat.他們好不容易了解我以后好像松了一口氣Andheseemedsorelievedtohavefinallyfiguredmeout.你真會赴宴嗎？Soyou*reactuallygonnagothroughwiththedinner?沒錯Yup.在公♥司♥里我需要戰(zhàn)友I'mdeterminedtomakepartnerinthisfirm就算得當(dāng)同性戀也再所不惜evenifIhavetobealesbianpartner.米蘭達(dá)離去后我想了一想AfterMirandaleft,Ihadathought.或許冷戰(zhàn)的起因不是恨Maybethecoldwarisn'tabouthate.而是恐懼對于未知的恐懼Maybeit*saboutfear,fearoftheunknown.已婚者并不恨單身貴族Marriedpeopledon'thatesingles.只是想“弄清楚”我們的想法Theyjustwantus"figuredout."該是停止猜忌滲透敵方陣營的時侯了Ifeltitwastimetostopallthisspeculationandinfiltratetheenemycamp.于是我和我最喜愛的夫妻檔大衛(wèi)和莉莎共進(jìn)午餐Lunchwithmyfavoritecouple,DavidandLisa.與其說婚姻生活我比較傾向說共同生活Well,Idon'tthinkofusasmarriedsomuchastogether.我們結(jié)婚了嗎？-Wait,arewemarried?-Uh,yeah.記得當(dāng)時你披上白紗我們還收到很多餐具嗎？Rememberthatdayyouworethewhitedressandwegotalltheflatware?記得Oh,yeah.或許我不該再和其他男人約會IguessIshouldstopseeingothermen.你呢？喜歡單身生活嗎？Hey.Whataboutyou?Youlikebeingsingle?我覺得還不錯Yeah.Mostofthetime,yeah.有時侯則不然比如…Andthentherearetheothertimes,youknow,likeum,像家庭聚會時likefamilyfunctionswhenyou'retheonlyonethafsnotmarried得和小孩坐一桌andtheysityouatthekid'stable.或看你們用同一支叉子吃東西我…Or,um,orwhenyoutwoeatoffthesamefork,Ijust...那真是太甜蜜了Oh,man,that'ssosweet.別哭出來Don'tstartcrying.他很多愁善感He'ssuchapussy.你將來打算結(jié)婚對嗎？Butyoudowanttogetmarriedsomeday,right?不知道Idon'tknow.我覺得自己可能不適合結(jié)婚I'mbeginningtothinkImaynotbethemarryingkind.真的嗎？Really?話才剛說完…Nosoonerhadthewords我自己已經(jīng)開始懷疑了comeoutofmymouththenIwonderediftheyweretrue.你們好Hey!你好西恩-Hey,Sean!-Hey!好一個驚喜Whatasurprise.-見過凱莉?幸會-Thisisourfriend,Carrie."Hi.我們正要吃甜點(diǎn)We'rejustabouttohavedessert..要不要一起享用？.好-Doyouwanttojoinus?-Uh,sure,sure.我真是太意外了Thisissuchasurprise.另一個讓我討厭單身的場合…AnothertimeIhatebeingsingle就是已婚的朋友“意外〃幫你介紹對象iswhenmarriedfriends"surprise"fixyouup.喝了兩杯濃咖啡吃了一個提拉米蘇后Twoespressosandatiramisulater,我得知西恩是三兄弟中最小的IhadlearnedthatSeanwastheyoungestofthreebrothers,他有自己的投資公♥司♥hadhisowninvestmentfirm而且即將遷入新購置的公♥寓♥andwasabouttomoveintoanapartmenthehadjustpurchased.你知道這全是安排好的對嗎？Youknowthiswasafix-up,right?其實(shí)你進(jìn)門前我就聞出來了Oh,please,Icouldsmellitbeforeyouwalkedinthedoor.我父母是相親結(jié)婚的Myparentsmetonafix-up,下個月是他們結(jié)婚41周年紀(jì)念andtheywillbemarried41yearsnextmonth.真是美滿Wow；that'sgreat.這時我才了解到他很期待結(jié)婚ItwasthenIrealized,Iwashavingcoffeewiththemarryingguy.結(jié)婚是這個魅力十足ThatelusiveandrareManhattanman曼哈頓男子的最終目標(biāo)whosesightsweresetonmarriage.我可以再約你出來嗎？So,Carrie...canIseeyouagain?當(dāng)然可以Sure.接下來一周半的時間我和西恩一起看了場電影…Overthenextweekandahalf,ImetSeanforamovie...又看了另一部電影Imethimforanothermovie.我在城廉斯索諾瑪幫他挑了一個高級起司磨碎器AndIhelpedhimpickoutatopofthelinecheesegrateratWilliams-Sonoma.十二號♥我要辦喬遷派對Oh,mybuddiesaregivingmeabighousewarmingonthe12th.邀請你參加帶朋友一起來Youshouldcome,andbringyourfriends.聽起來好像很有意思Soundslikefun.謝謝你陪我共度美好時光Thanksforagreatday.他就像DKNY服飾活生生的翻版HewaslikethefleshandbloodequivalentofaDKNYdress.雖然明知和自己的風(fēng)格不合Youknowit'snotyourstyle,butit'srightthere,但順便試穿也無妨soyoutryitonanyway.十二號♥當(dāng)天晚上…Itwasthenightofthe12th.一對假的女同性戀到紐約東區(qū)OntheEastSide,apseudolesbiancouple出席一名共和黨員的晚宴attendedaright-wingRepublicandinnerparty.你們來了Hey!西區(qū)則有三個單身女郎OntheWestSide,atrioofsinglegals參加一個單身漢的喬遷派對wenttoasingleguy'shousewarmingparty.他的朋友帥嗎？Sotellme,arehisfriendscute?不知道我從沒見過他們Idon'tknow,Ihaven*tmetthemyet.你是怎么在一周內(nèi)交上新男朋友？Howdidyoumanagetogetanewboyfriendinaweek?他不是我的男朋友He'snotmyboyfriend.我只是在試試而已He'sjustsomebodyI'mtryingon.準(zhǔn)備好了嗎？AllrightReady?所有賓客都成雙成對EverywhereIlooked,peoplewerestandingintwos.這里簡直像有房♥租限制的諾亞方用ItwaslikeNoah'sUpperWestSiderent-controlledark.他們?nèi)欠蚱迿nIt'sallmarriedcouples.莎曼珊瞪了我一眼好像我將她出♥賣♥♥♥給敵人SamanthagavemealooklikeIhadsoldhertotheenemy只是為了換取巧克力棒和尼龍襪forchocolatebarsandnylons.這是給你的恭喜Oh,hey,thisisforyou.你想必就是夏洛特Oh,youmustbeCharlotte.幸會-Hi.-Hi.你一定是莎曼珊AndyouhavetobeSamantha.沒錯請問吧臺在哪里？Yeah.Where'sthebar?在廚房♥你一定找得到就是有瓦斯?fàn)t的那一間Uh,kitchen,youcan'tmissit,roomwiththestove.這里真漂亮Thisapartmentisamazing!謝謝我花了很多年規(guī)劃Thanks.Tvebeenplanningitforyears.我?guī)銋⒂^Comeon,Illgiveyouguysthegrandtour.我們從已婚夫妻旁走過時AsImovedthroughthemarriedcouples,我發(fā)現(xiàn)一件事…Inoticedsomethingwasdifferent...她們眼中沒有恐懼憐憫也不會對我品頭論足Nofear,nopity,nopointing.難不成西恩的朋友都是善良的反戰(zhàn)者嗎？WereSean'sfriendscoldwarconscientiousobjectors還是因?yàn)槲乙呀?jīng)被她們“摸清楚了”?orwasitjustthatIwasHfiguredout"?會計(jì)師告訴我最好買♥♥低風(fēng)險(xiǎn)的股票Myaccountantsaysthatitrsbesttogowithlowriskstocks.這要視清況而定你對投資持何種心態(tài)？Well,thatdepends.Imean,whatareyourexpectations?我也不太確定Well,I'mnotsure.甜心我要介紹朋友給你Honey,Ineedyoutocomeoverhereandmeetsomeone.好莎曼珊莎曼珊見過伊蓮Sure.Uh,thisisSamantha,Samantha,thisisElaine.我是他太太Hiswife.甜心我們?nèi)e的房♥間Honey,Ireallyneedyouintheotherroom.好Sure.很高興和你聊莎曼珊Itwasnicetalkingtoyou,Samantha.這里是書房♥Andthisistheden.是高級皮椅我爰死它們了Oh,youhaveoneoftheseleatherclubchairs.Ilovethese.謝謝目前我把這里當(dāng)辦公室Thanks,fmusingthisroomasanofficenow,但有一天…這里會變成小孩的房♥間butsomedaythisisgonnabethekid'sroom.看Look.三年前我在阿斯彭買♥♥的IgotthisthreeyearsagoinAspen.喜歡嗎？Whatdoyouthink?這是我的錯Okay,Ioweyou.我不知道他的朋友全都結(jié)婚了Ididn'tknowthatallhisbuddiesweregonnabemarried.天啊你在喝龍舌蘭？Oh,myGod,you'redoingtequilashots?你看那邊那個男的Youseethatbuddyoverthere?我上過他Ifuckedhim.再看那邊那一個Seethatbuddyoverthere?我也上過他Ifuckedhimtoo.我沒想到還會見到他們IneverthoughtI'dseethemagain.你已婚的前男友都該貼上標(biāo)簽Well,maybeweshouldstarttaggingyourmarriedmen這樣你才能追蹤他們的動向andthatwayyoucankeeptrackofthem.他會向你求婚He'sgonnaaskyoutomarryhim.不可能Heisnotgoingtoaskmetomarryhim.我們才約會一周I'vebeendatinghimaweekandahalf.除非慎重考慮結(jié)婚的事NoguybuysaclassicsixontheUpperWestSide否則沒人會在上西城區(qū)買♥♥這么好的房♥子unlesstheyareseriouslythinkingaboutmarriage.有人會看手相夏洛特則會觀察不動產(chǎn)Somepeoplereadpalms,Charlottereadrealestate.若你成為那些已婚白♥癡♥的一員Ifyouturnintooneofthosemarriedassholes,我會斃了你rilkillyou.西恩好得沒話說Seanisthegreatestguy,而且又喜歡小孩andheloveskids.他不但有自己的事業(yè)Plus,heownshisownbusiness,銀行里還有三十萬元存款andhersgot$300,000inthebank.我們都和他有過一腿Webothsleptwithhim,他的床上功夫好極了andheisgreatinbed.我在這場喬遷派對待了一個半小時Anhourandahalfintothishousewarming,從派對的貴賓變成了戰(zhàn)俘Ihadgonefrompartyguesttoprisonerofwar.莎曼珊醉得一蹋糊涂我得送她回去休息Samanthaistotallydrunk.Tvegottogetheroutofhere.我和你們一起走You*renotgoinganywherewithoutme.凱莉Carrie!天啊又有朋友來了Oh,God,morefriends.驚喜吧Surprise!我的確感到訝異Itcertainlywas.上回我見到佩萱絲時她在公車上推我LasttimeIsawPatienceshewasshovingmeonabus.西恩告訴我們你們在約會WhenSeantoldusyouandheweredating,我們也非常高興wewerejustsothrilled.上次在你們家發(fā)生的事…Well,listen,aboutwhathappenedatyourbeachhousetheotherday...別提那件事Don'tmentionit.我不知道…Well,Ijust...fmnotevensure...別再說下去了Isaiddon'tmentionit.這場派對糟得不像話Thispartyisterrible.你是哪位？Whoareyou?我的朋友佩萱絲和她的丈夫彼得Um,thisismyfriendPatience,andthisisherhusbandPeter.久仰大名Iheardaboutyou.■像胡椒碾磨器般的大弟弟-我們得走了-Bigpeppermilldick!-Okay,wegottago!我們的?；饏f(xié)議剎那間破滅Andjustassuddenly,ourlittlecease-firewasover.同時在紐約的另一端形勢漸趨和緩Meanwhile,acrosstown,thingswerewindingdown.非常感謝你的招待我們都玩得很盡興Thankyousomuch.Wereallyhadagreattime.我也一樣Oh,asdidweall.她真是個好伴侶Sheisarealfind.不久后我們會再辦一次We'lldoitagainsoon.先去按電梯Filmeetyouattheelevator,okay?我稍后就來Ijustneedto...恐怕我們辦不到Wecan'tdoitagainsoon.席德和我并不是一對SydandIaren'treallyacouple.其實(shí)我們根本不是同性戀Infact,we'renotevenreallylesbians.她是但我不是Well,Sydis,I'mnot.我只是想借機(jī)和你談?wù)勎以诠?hearts;司♥的工作Ijusttookadvantageofthesituationtobendyourearaboutmyworkatthefirm.很聰明的做法Shrewdmove,counselor.別放在心上Noharmdone.謝謝Thankyou,sir.我太太會大失所望Mywifewillbedisappointed.她希望為我們的社交圈增加一對女同性戀Shewaslookingtoaddalesbiancoupletoourcircle.搭電梯時Astheyrodebetweenfloors,米蘭達(dá)心中想著若她有伴侶生活會多自在…Mirandaconsideredhowmucheasierherlifewouldbe姑且不論對方是男是女ifshewereinacouple,anycouple.我真的不是同性戀Yup,definitelystraight.完全正確Yeah...youare.抱歉Sorry.米蘭達(dá)為自己不是同性戀而懊惱WhileMirandacursedherheterosexuality想著這場戰(zhàn)爭里自己能撐多久的同時andwonderedhowmuchlongershecouldfightthewar,夏洛特把錯怪在龍舌蘭酒上硬逼莎曼珊搭上計(jì)程車CharlottecursedtequilaandforcedSamanthaintoacab.她認(rèn)為莎曼珊喝的太醉不能獨(dú)自回家ShedecidedSamanthawastoodrunktogethomealone堅(jiān)持讓她睡在沙發(fā)上andinsistedshespendthenightonhercouch.到家了We'rehome.終于到家了We*rehome.Oh,boy!我?guī)湍汩_門Letmegetthatdoorforyou.你好Hi.夠了…Allright,allright.-我喜歡他-再見-Ilikeyou!-Bye,bye.她扶莎曼珊上樓上♥床♥睡覺但事情還沒告一段落ShegotSamanthaupstairsandsafelytobed,orsoshethought.幾小時后Acoupleofhourslater,莎曼珊醒了依然是酒醉的單身女郎Samanthawokeupstilldrunkandstillsingle.對她而言單身代表一個意義AndsingletoSamanthameantonething.可以給我一根煙嗎？CanIhaveacigarette?沒問題Sure.可以給我一個吻嗎？CanIhaveakiss?佩萱絲去買♥♥果汁和松餅Patiencewentouttogetjuiceandmuffins.馬上就回來She*llberightback.他下半身一♥絲♥不♥掛♥站在那里Therehewas,fullfrontal...friend.太好了Good!他就那樣神情自若地站著Hejuststoodthere,casual,happy,hangingout.我不知所措Ididn'tknowwhattodo,whattosay.只覺得他異常興奮Ionlyknewonething,that'swaytoomuchPeterbeforecoffee.?早安?早-Goodmorning.-Hey.我買♥♥了新鮮果汁和可口的松餅I'vegotsomefreshjuiceandthegoodmuffins.你怎么了？Sowhat'shappening?我在走廊上碰到彼得他沒穿內(nèi)♥褲♥Oh,well,um,IranintoPeterinthehallway,withouthisunderwearon.你真有眼光P.S.Congratulations.天氣很好Sunnyday.甜心凱莉真的在走廊看到你的小♥弟♥弟♥嗎？Honey,didCarrieseeyourdickinthehall?當(dāng)時我正要去廁所Oh,yeah,shecaughtmeonthewaytothebathroom.正要去廁所Oh,onthewaytothebathroom.太好了有好吃的松餅Oh,yeah!Thegoodmuffins.我們今天有何安排？So,um,whatarewedoingtoday?最后我只帶了一個松餅Ibarelyhadtimetoshovea"goodmuffin"inmypurse就匆匆啟程回紐約beforeIwasonmywaybacktoNewYork.他到底居心何在？天啊…Oh,Jesus...我真的不該這么做或許會被人撞見Ireallyshouldn't,somebodymightsee.你何不到樓上來一下？一下就好Whydon'tyoucomeupstairs,justforaminute?莎曼珊？Samantha?別害怕小姐Don'tbescared,miss.是我湯米我正要離開It'sme,Tommy.Irmjustleaving.是你的朋友請我來的Yourfriendinvitedmeup.我知道不該這么做Iknowitwaswrong,但是離開家后我一直覺得很孤獨(dú)…butI'vejustbeensolonelysinceIlefthomeand...我渴望得到女人的撫摸慰藉Iwantedthefeelofawoman'stouchonme.我要進(jìn)洗手間I'mgoingintothebathroomnow出來時別讓我再看到你andwhenIcomeoutyouwon'tbehere.這件事就當(dāng)沒發(fā)生過AndIneverwantthismentionedagain.我?guī)湍汩_門小姐Letmegetthedoorforyou,miss.我原本希望你留下過夜Iwaskindofhopingyou'dstayover.聽我說西恩Look,Sean,um...我認(rèn)為我們不適合在一起Idon'tthinkthisisgonnawork.我們追求的是不同的生活Wewantdifferentthings.你想結(jié)婚…Youobviouslywanttogetmarried而我不知道自己要什么andIdon'tknowwhatIwant.你感覺得出我的心急迫切Youcouldsmellmydesperation,right?不只是…No,no,no.Itsjust...我在嘗試與你相處懂嗎？It's…Iwas,uh,tryingyouon,youknow?看看我們合不合適Toseeifitfit.結(jié)果合不來Itdoesn't.很抱歉I'msorry.我真搞不懂你們女人Idon'tunderstandyouwomen.我總聽你們說“我想結(jié)婚”AllIhearis,"Iwanttogetmarried.Iwanttogetmarried."但卻沒有一個人答應(yīng)我Andnoneofyousaysyes.到底是怎么回事？Whatthefuck?我再也受不了一個一個試了I'msotiredofgoingthroughwomen.我只是想結(jié)婚Ijustwanttogetmarried.我或許認(rèn)識和你一拍即合的人Imayknowsomeonewho'sperfectforyou.是誰？Who?開始時他們很隨性Theystartedoutcasual,只是吃個早午餐聽場音樂會abrunchhere,aconcertthere.但很快他們就開始選購瓷器ButprettysoontheywerevisitingChina.正式場合我一直想用這種餐具Ialwayswantedthispatternforformaldining.真的嗎？Areyouserious?夏洛特當(dāng)場決定分手Charlottebrokeitoffthenandthere.他們絕不可能在一起Itwouldneverwork.他的風(fēng)格是美式上流社會她則屬于法式鄉(xiāng)村HewasAmericanclassic,shewasFrenchcountry.為何你朋友從沒打過電♥話♥?Yourfriendnevercalledlikeshepromised.Whyisthat?不知道Idon*tknow.在婚姻戰(zhàn)爭的槍林彈雨中AsIsiftedthroughtherubbleofmymarriageskirmish,我產(chǎn)生了一個想法Ihadathought.或許已婚與未婚者的沖突Maybethefightbetweenmarriedsandsingles就像北愛爾蘭的戰(zhàn)爭一樣islikethewarinNorthernIreland.基本上我們是一樣的We'reallbasicallythesame；只是立場截然不同butsomehow,wewoundupondifferentsides.有另一半陪著走回家是很好Sure,it*dbegreattohavethatonespecialpersontowalkhomewith,但有時侯什么也比不過butsometimes,there*snothingbetter和單身女性朋友一同看電影享受夜晚時光thanmeetingyoursinglegirlfriendsforanightatthemovies.?YouknowIgotit??AllTmasking??Isforalittlerespectwhenyoucomehome??Justalittlebit??Hey,babyJustalittlebit??Whenyoucomehome??Justalittlebit??Mister??Justalittlebit??Iain'tgonnadoyouwrong??Whileyou'regone??Ain'tgonnadoyouwrong??*CauseIdon'twantto??AllTmasking?I'mconfused.Whywouldhedothat?他想勾引你嗎？Didhewanttohavesexwithyou?不知道感覺不像這么回事Idon*tknow.Itdidn'tfeelsexual.可能他只是想獻(xiàn)寶猴子也會這樣Maybehejustwantedtoshowitoff,likeamonkey.他的尺寸如何？Sohowbigwasit?來點(diǎn)新鮮的胡椒嗎?Freshpepper?好謝謝Yes,please.Thankyouverymuch.夠了That*lldo.你要來點(diǎn)新鮮的胡椒嗎？Wouldyoulikesomefreshpepper?寶貝我求之不得Oh,honey,Tdlovesomefreshpepper.其實(shí)我想這桌每個人都要加很多胡椒Infact,Ithinkeveryoneatthistablecouldusealotoffreshpepper.謝謝Thanks.所以我告訴她我不了解她的心情Mmm,soItoldherIdidn'tunderstandwhyshewassoupset.她說我無法理解它ShesaidIcouldn'tunderstandit,■我還是單身■怎么說？-fmsingle.-Andwhat?單身女郎處心積慮Singlewomenprowlbeachhouses一窺朋友"丈夫'的小♥弟♥弟♥嗎hopingforglimpsesoftheirfriends1husbands*dicks?她和你的關(guān)系很好嗎？Howgoodofafriendwasshe?這有什么差別？What'sthedifference?結(jié)了婚失去身價(jià)后Whensomeonegetsmarried,allbetsareoff.我們就成了她們的敵人Theybecomemarried,andwebecometheenemy.米蘭達(dá)是律師事務(wù)所里唯一的單身貴族Astheonlysinglelawyerworkingatherlawfirm,她仔細(xì)思考過這個問題Mirandahadgiventhistopicsomethought.已婚女子都知道Youknow,marriedwomenarethreatened我們可能和任何人發(fā)♥生♥關(guān)♥系♥becausewecanhavesexanytime,anywhere,withanyone.是這樣嗎？Wecan?所以怕我們和她們丈夫有染Andthey'reafraidwe'regonnahaveitanytime,anywhere,withtheirhusbands.我絕不接受已婚的男人Iwouldneversleepwithamarriedman.你確定嗎？Whatmakesyousosureyouhaven't?結(jié)婚戒指還是能拿下來Weddingringscomeoff,youknow.她們認(rèn)為未婚者全都不可靠Faceit,ladies,ifyou'restillsingle,youarenottobetrusted.已婚女性并非全都這么想Comeon,notallmarriedwomenfeelthatway.夏洛特將婚姻視為婦女聯(lián)誼會Charlottetreatedmarriagelikeasorority且迫不及待想加入shewasdesperatelyhopingtopledge.你說得沒錯You'reright,notall.但那些不擔(dān)心的人會可憐你Theoneswhodon'tfearyou,pityyou.才沒有這種事That'snottrue.你真的沒見過那種Areyoutellingmeyouhaven'tgottenthose“單身真可|令"表情嗎？"poorsingleyou"looks?我很討厭那種表情Ihatethose.坦白說我見過Okay,yes,Ihave.若在派對中你是唯一單身的人Ihatewhenyou'retheonlysinglepersonatadinnerparty他們的表情就像在說你是…andtheyalllookatyoulikeyou'rea...-沒人要？-異類-loser?-Leper.-蕩♥婦♥■完全正確-Whore.-Exactly.已婚者真是我們的大敵I'mtellingyou,marriedpeoplearetheenemy!米蘭達(dá)說對了嗎？WasMirandaright?已婚與未婚者真的勢不兩立？Wereweenemies?兩者之間正上演一場秘密的冷戰(zhàn)嗎？Isthereasecretcoldwarbetweenmarriedsandsingles?我很喜歡單身的女性朋友Ilovemysinglefriends,但因?yàn)槲医Y(jié)婚了butnowthatI'mmarried,無法像從前時常見面Idon'tseethemasmuchasIusedto.我覺得非常痛苦It'stoopainful.她們讓我想起從前絕望的日子TheyremindmeofhowdesperateIusedtobe.女性婚后會忘記自我Whenwomengetmarried,theyforgetwhotheyare.由“我”變成俄們”"I"becomes"we”.“我們喜歡這部電影""Welovedthemovie."“我們討厭那間餐廳〃"Wehatethatrestaurant."我們…We,we,we,we,we.本來我和拍檔什么事都一起做MybestbuddyandIdideverythingtogether.結(jié)果他卻娶了一個和我合不來的女孩Thenhemarriedthisgirlwhodoesn*tlikeme.現(xiàn)在我只有在超級杯比賽時才見得到他NowIonlyseehimonSuperBowlSunday.這件事取決于自己想過何種生活I(lǐng)t'sallaboutwhatyouwantoutoflife.有些人像我一樣選擇長大Somepeople,likeme,choosetogrowup,面對現(xiàn)實(shí)乖乖結(jié)婚facereality,andgetmarried.至于其他人…怎么說？Andotherschooseto,what?像長不大的孩子般過著空虛惱人的生活Liveanempty,hauntedlifeofstuntedadolescence.這不是一場冷戰(zhàn)No,it'snotacoldwar.而是激烈的大戰(zhàn)It'sanoutandoutbattle.而且參戰(zhàn)者不只是一般人Anditisn'tjuststraightpeople.我認(rèn)識的同性戀者都跑到夏威夷EverygayguyIknowisrunningofftoHawaii,穿長袖花襯衫宣誓結(jié)婚puttingonacaftan,recitingvows,心中想著我比不上他們andfeelingsuperiortome.穿長袖花襯衫Caftans?沒錯還戴蘭花做的花環(huán)Oh,yes,withorchidleis.“歡迎〃Aloha.我懷念過去大家都還是單身的時光Imisstheoldtimeswheneveryonewasalone.我開始覺得…Now,I'mjuststartingtofeellike■自己像是被放逐…-凱莉？-I'manoutcastintheoutcasts.Carrie?天啊喬Oh,myGod!Joe!好多年沒見了Jeez,it*sbeenyears.我一直沒遇到你自從…Ihaven'tseenyousinceyouwere,um...還不是同性戀時？Straight?我是說‘西貢小姐〃演出后Well,IwasgonnasayinMissSaigon.我還在表演Oh.Stillam.我很喜歡這部音樂劇IloveMissSaigon.這位是我的朋友史丹佛Oh,thisis,um,thisismyfriend,Stanford.這是我的親蜜爰人盧Hi.Andthisismylifepartner,Lou.看是結(jié)婚戒指Oh,wow.Lookatthat.恭喜你們Congratulations.-在哪里公♥證♥的？?巴尼百貨-Whereareyouregistered?-Barney's.我只是在開玩笑Iwaskidding.你呢凱莉結(jié)婚了嗎？SoCarrie,howaboutyou?Areyoumarried?也不算是…我的意思是還沒有Oh,notreally.Imean,no!我們想的是同一件事嗎？AreyouthinkingwhatI'mthinking??好極了?什么事？-Perfect!-What?我們想要一個孩子Well,LouandIareinterestedinhavingachild.我們已經(jīng)找到人代產(chǎn)了但還需要一顆健康的卵子Wealreadyhaveasurrogate,butweneedatop-notchegg.你愿意捐贈嗎？Whatareyourfeelingsaboutdonatingone?這是我們的名片Well,listen,here*sourcard.考慮一下再聯(lián)絡(luò)我們Youthinkaboutitandgiveusacall.若你愿意我們會付錢-Wellpay.-