星火30篇文章貫通考研詞匯文本

unit1ThePermitIthinkthebuildingmusthavebeenusedasafarmer'swinterstore;Ifoundpilesofforgottendriedchestnutsandgraininrottingbarrels.Itriedthechestnutsbuttheytastedsourandsharp,andsomeofthemhadsmallteeth-marksintheirdark,peelingskins.Paulosaidhewouldbringmefood,butthatwasthreedaysago.Yesterday,Iheardacarenginegettingcloser,andclimbeduptohideintheraftersofthepatchedroof,buttheGuardiaCivilmenjustlookedinquicklythroughthesmashedwindowsandbrokendoorsbeforetheyleft.Iclungtothedustywoodenrafter,feelingitcreakandbendundermyweight,andtriedtomakenonoise.Myarmsandlegsgrewnumb,thenbegantotremble,andIlongedtomove,butIwaiteduntilIheardthepolicemendriveoff.IknowthatPaulowouldnothavetoldthemaboutme.AndIknowthattheywillreturn.Whenwebeganthefinalpartofourjourney,wewerewarnedthatthepolicepatrolthelandaroundhereregularly.Theyarealwayssearchingforus,orotherslikeus;thecoastofMoroccoandthePresidioofCeutaareonlytenmilesawayacrosstheStraits.ThatishowIgothere:squeezedinwithfifteenothermeninashallowboatmeantforeight,withthecoldwavesreachingoverthesidesandthenightdeepandblackasatomb.Ihaveneverbeenmorescared.Iprayedallthewayacross,andthoughtaboutmyfamily.Itoldmyself,overandover,thatIwasdoingitforthem.Thattriptookalmostallofmymoney.AllofthemoneyIhadsavedbackhomeinEcuador,allofthemoneyIhadworkedforontheway.Theboatmenleftusonabeachinthemiddleofthenight.Welostsightofthembutwecouldstillheartheirsmallengineacrossthewaves.Sixofusstartedwalkinginlandbuttheotherswaitedforthecontact,thefriendsoftheboatmen,astheyhadbeentold,andmettheGuardiaCivilinstead.Wewerelucky:wemetPaulo.Wefoundthetownandwaiteduntilthefirstbaropened;Iwentinalonewhiletheothershidintheorchardnearby.WhenIaskedforcoffee,theyoungbarmanlookedatmeandnodded.Hemadethecoffee,thendisappearedintothebackroom.Coldandwithoutstrength,Iwrappedmyhandsaroundthewarmcup,notcaringwhetherthebarmanhadcalledthepolice,notcaringaboutthenextmoment,justaboutthepresent.ButthemanhadcalledPaulo,whocameandhelpedus.Pauloisalwayssmiling,alwayshappy.HeisfromSeville,abusycityofmanypeople,andhe--完整版學(xué)習(xí)資料分享 knowsmanypeople.Paulofoundworkforus.Imadegoodmoneyonthefarms.Ipickedcabbages,andcauliflowers,andartichokesandbroccoli.Ipickedgreatroundyellowsquashesthatsmelledofrichperfumewhenyoubrokethem.Thefarmershiredusbytheday,andwerecontent.Thelocalpeoplewillnotworkforthewageswearepaid.Butthereweremanyfarms,andmanycropstobepicked.Wewerewelcomed.Isharedasmallcleanhouseinthetownwithsevenotherworkers.WehadjourneyedfromEcuador,Colombia,Venezuela,evenArgentina.Paulofoundthehouseforus-heknewthelandlordandarrangedagoodprice.Welivedwell,withenoughfoodandsometimeswine.IearnedmoreinaweekthanIcouldinthreemonthsbackhome,iftherehadbeenworktodothere.Isentmostofthemoneythatwaslefttomywifeandparents,andwrotemanyletterstothem.Thenthegovernmentchangedtherules,sothatweneededworkpermits.IqueuedwithhundredsofotherworkersoutsidetheAyuntamiento,waitingfortheapplicationforms.WesatonthestonebenchesbeneaththetreesinthePla?aandreadtheforms.Someoftheotherworkersarefromsmallvillagesandtowns,andcannotreadaswellasIcan,soIexplainedtothemthatthegovernmentwantedourbirthcertificates,drivinglicences,passportsandmanyotherdocuments.Manyoftheworkershadperhapsoneortwoofthesedocuments,butmosthadnone.IhelpedtheotherscompletetheformsandwegavethemtotheclerkintheAyuntamiento.Helookedatourdocuments,stampedtheformsmanytimesandtoldusthattheywouldbesenttoMadrid,andourpermitswouldbereturnedintwoorthreemonths.Iftheformswereapproved.Wehadtowait.EvenPauloandhisfriendscouldnothelpus.Thefirstmonthwasnottoobad,asmostofthefarmerscontinuedtouseus;theircropswererichandheavy,waitingtobepicked.ThensomemenfromMadridvisitedallofthefarms,andmaybehalfofthefarmersstoppedusingus.Thefarmerstoldusthattheyweresorry,andwebelievedthem.Sothesecondmonthwasworse:fewofthefarmerswoulduseus,andthosethatdidpaidverypoorwages.Wesharedwhatwehad,andateonceaday:rice,pasta,bread,cheapfoodthatwouldfillourstomachs.Webegantostareateachother,andwonderwhichofuswouldfindwork.Therewerefightsinthemorning,betweendifferentgroupsofworkers,whenthefarms'foremencametothePla?atochoosewhowouldworkthatday.Butstillwehadsome--完整版學(xué)習(xí)資料分享 WORD格式--可編輯--專業(yè)資料hope.Welostthehouseinthethirdmonth,aswehadnomoneyforrent.Wewereabletogetsomefoodfromthecharitykitchensaroundthetown,andthechurch,butwefoundalwaysalongqueueandverylittlefood.Wetookourbagsandblanketsandsleptinthefields.Thentheweatherbecamecoldandwesleptwherewecould,huddledtogether,inoldforgottenbuildingsandalleys.SometimesIdreamedofmyfamilyandmyhome,andwhenIawokeIwishedthedreamcouldcontinue.Thepeopleofthetownstaredatusfromthesidesoftheireyesastheypassedus.Theyclenchedtheirhandsandmuttered,andsomeofthemspatonthepavement.Afewofuswereattackedandbeateninthedark,anddrivenfromtheparksandstreets.Allofthetime,thePolicetoldustomoveon,moveon.Itistheendofthethirdmonthwhenithappens.ThefarmershirecoachesandsendthemintothePla?aColom.Fromfouro'clockinthemorningwewaitinshufflingsilence,handspusheddeepintopockets,ourhatspulleddowntightagainstthecoldandthewatchingpolicemen.Bythetimethecoachesarrivetherearehundredsofworkerswaitinginthedarkness.Wepressforwardasthedoorsopen.Theforemenstandonthebottomstepsofthecoachesandask,"Whohasthepermit?"Themenwithpermitsholdthemupandareallowedontothecoaches.SomeoftheworkersarefromthecountriesinEuropeanddononeedpermits,sotheyareallowedonwhentheyshowtheirpassports.IgofromcoachtocoachuntilIseeagroupofChileans,whoIknowhavenopermits,climbaboardawaitingcoach.Theleaderoftheirgroupspeaksfirstwiththeforemanandshakeshishand,thentheyaretakenon.Istandbeforetheforeman."Youhavethepermit?"heasksme.Heisbroadandstout,andfillsthedoorwayofthecoach.Hisfatneckspillsfromtheupturnedcollarofhisleatherjacket.Hishairisshavenclosetohishead.IexplaintohimthatmyapplicationwasrejectedbutIhavetriedagain."Comebackwhenyouhaveapermit,"hetellsme.Hefrownsashepullsonhiscigaretteandlooksdowntheavenuetowherethepolicemenarewatchingthecoaches.IexplaintohimthatthatIamahardworker,thatIhaveeatenonlyonceinthreedays,thatIamdesperatetoworkandsendmoneytomyfamily.--完整版學(xué)習(xí)資料分享 Helooksatthepolicemen,whohavestartedwalkingalongthepavementbesidethecoaches,andhescowlsatmeandsays,"GotoMadridandtellthem."TheChileansarelaughingandpointingatmethroughthecoachwindows.Theforemanflickshishalf-finishedcigaretteintothegutterbymyfootandIpunchhiminthestomach.Hefoldsoverwithasmallcry.ThepolicemenlookatusandIbegintorun,awayfromthePla?a,awayfromthecoaches,intothedarksidestreetsandavenues.Ihearloudrunningstepsclosebehindme,andtheroarofcarengines.Theshutteredbuildingsreflectthebluelights.Islidemybodyintotheshadowsofashop'sbackdoor,behindtwotallmetalbinsthatstinkofrottingmeatandurine.Igasp,andeachbreathburns.Myhearthammersagainstmychest.Iwaitforalongtimeuntilthesoundsofthecarsandpeoplefade.Iwalkslowlytotheendofthealleyandlookout,butthestreetsareempty.Ihaverunalmosttotheriver;Icanhearitrushinginthedarknessbeneathme.Myrighthandfeelscold.Ilookdown,intheyellowlightofastreetlamp,andseemyhandstillclenchedintoafist.Itlookslikethehandofanotherperson,notpartofme.Ashortblade,nolongerthanmythumb,sticksoutfromthefist.Theblade,myfist,andmysleeveareallstaineddarkred.PaulogavemetheknifewhenIpickedartichokesonthefarms.Theshortthickbladeisverysharp,madeforslicingthroughtheplants'thickstalks.Iscrambleddowntothebanksoftheriverandthrewtheknifeintothenight.Ihearditsplashfaraway.Therivertouchedmyfeet.Ireacheddownandwashedmysleeveandhand,althoughthewaterwassocold,likeice,thatmyhandbecamenumb.ThenIwalkedbackuptothestreet.Ifoundsomeoftheotherworkershidinginthedesertedwarehousewehadfound.OneofthemwenttofindPaulo,whocameandtoldmeabouttheoldfarmbuildingsneartothecoastroad.Paulowasnotsmiling.IwaiteduntildarknessbeforeIfollowedtheroadoutofthetown,throwingmyselfintotheditchifIheardacarapproaching.TheweatherhasbeenclearandIhaveseenthecoastofMoroccoeveryday.Acrosstheblueseafleckedwithsun,thelandisastripofdarkbrownandgrey,andlookscloseenoughformetotouch.MaybeIcouldfindanoldtractortyretubearoundthefarmandfloatacrosstheStraits?OrmaybeIcouldwalkalongtheshoreandstealaboat?--完整版學(xué)習(xí)資料分享 Idonotwanttobecomeathief.Iamanhonestmanwhowantsonlytoworkandsupporthisfamily.ButwhatcanIdo?IwillwaithereforPauloandlistentohim.Hewilltellmewhattodoforthebest.Iknowthathewillhelpme.unit2TimelessphotographsIlovetolookatoldphotographsinthealbum（影集）.Myfatherhadabigboxofpicturesinthecabinetandsomeofthepicturesgowaybacktothe1890's.Thewomendressedwithsuchdignityandhadstylebackthen.MyDadwouldlingeraroundhispreciousboxofphotographsandteelmestoriesabouteachphotoandveryone.Itwasoneofthosemomentsthatyoucouldnotreallyappreciatewhenyouwereyound.ItisonlyafterhewaslonggonethatIcanlookbackandsaythanksfortakingthetimetoshowmeatinywindowintotheworldofpeoplewhoreallydidknowhowtolive.IfoundafewofmyauntsintheirfashionableoutfitsbyanoldCadillacpretendingtodrinkwhisky.ManyofthephotographsweretakeninCOneyIslandandCapeCod.Iespeciallylovethephotographsofthebathingbeautiesandtheirswimsuits.THesuitsarequitemodestbytoday'sstandardsbuttheyoungwomendidn'tseemtocare.TheywerestayingatsuchplacesasNewportBeachandCapeCodhavingthetimeoftheirlivesrunninginandoutofthetide.Onephotographhadavendor（小販）sellingdogs（熱狗）byacoaster（輪船）atCOneyIsland--ayoungerpictureofmymotherwithherebrownhairandblueeyeseagertogoonboardwithmyDad.HelookedabitfrightenedinthepictureasIcouldseehewasloldingontightlytothebartothecoaster,hisblackhairflyinginthebreeze.IsmilewhenIlookatthatpicturebecauseitishardtoimagineanyone'sDadeverbeingakid.Helookedlikehewashavingagreattimeprobablybecausehewaswithmymother.SHeissmilinginthepictureandwearingawhiteblouse（女襯衫），blueshortsandtennisshoes.Sheisquitealooker（美女），IcanseewhymyDadlikedhersomuch.Idigdowntothebottomoftheboxandseetwolargephotographs.Oneisdated1900andtheotheroneisdated1997--arecentpicturethatlookssimilartotheolderone.Theolderpicturelooksfamiliarbecauseitistakeninthesameplace--thesummerhome.Iwilldescribetheolderphotographasveryinterestinginthestyleofdressandexactlywherethepeoplearesitting.Theyareposedoutsidethecottagebyasmalltreethatisstilltheretoday.Awomanissittinginarockingchair,withhereblackhairpulledupinabun（腦后的女髻）.Sheisnotsmilingbutlookingawayfromthecameraandwearingalongblackdress.Anotherwomaniswearingawhiteblousewithanecktie（領(lǐng)結(jié)）andalongblackskirt.Herhairisalsolongandblonder（金黃色的）butpulledbackinabun.Therearetwomenoneithersideofawoodentable.BOthmenappearolderandaredressedinhatsandsuitsandties,trousersandSUndayshoes.Neitherissmiling.（IhavethedistinctfeelingthatthewomenaretheirwivesanditisSunday.）theyprobablyarehungryfortheirroastbeefandpotatoes,butthatisjustmyguess.Thereisayoungboy,probablyabout13inthephotograph,Heiswearingawhiteblouse,blackshorts,longblacksocksandtansportsshoes.Heispettingablackdogthatissittingontopoftheroundwoodentable.Theboyisbendingdownandheisn'tsmilingeither.Itmusthavebeenhotoutsideandheprobablywantstogoforaswimwiththedog.ThewaterisjustbelowthemandheisprobablywonderingwhyhehastotakethisstupidpicturealldresseduponaSunday.Inoticethatthecolorofmycabinwasquitedifferentin1900anditwasmuchsmaller.Thecolorwasgreen,withwhiterailings（欄桿）aroundtheporchandstepsleadingdowntothepatio（院子）.ThatiswherethepictureofthisSmartFamilywastaken.ThefamilyappearsratherstiffinthephotobutIamsurethattheyhadagoodlaughaftertheSundaydinnerwasserved.Thesecondlargerphotographisofmyownfamilyabout1997.Itisalsoinblackandwhite.Wedidn'twearandyolderclothersbutusedourownclothes.Thetreeinthebackgroundhasgrowntoenormousheightsandisstillstanding.ThestepsleadingdowntoMousamLakehavecrackedandareinawfulneedofrepair.Believeitorbot,westillowntheoldwoodentableandalloftherockingchairsownedbytheSmartFamily.IdidasearchoftheSmartFamilyandtheywereoriginallyfromPortsmouth（樸茨茅斯）.Atleastfiveotherfamiliesownedmycottagebeforemyfatherboughtitin1950forthreethousanddollars.ThecottagecomeswiththirteenacresoflandthatIstillownalongwithmysevenbrothersandsisters.Itwaspassedontomewhenmymotherdied.WehaveformedtheCampFundtopaythetaxesandpreserveourlegacy.ItisabeautifulcabinonaprimespotonMousamLake.Iwasnotherewhenthisphotowastakenandithangsinthelivingroomofthecabin.Manyvistorscommentonitandthinkitisquiteamazingtohaveahouseforsolong.Thehitoryofthehouseisinterestingtoviewfromphotographs.AroundthetablearemybrothereBobjustwearingacasualshirtandshorts(smilling),AnniewearingaT-Shirtandshorts.Mikewearingawhiteshirtandlongnylontrousersnotsmiling,Mary,whomIcouldn'ttellwhatshewaswearing,myMom,herwhitehairandherbeautifulblueeyesandsmile,waswearingapeachblouseandslacks,myDadwasn'taliveforthisphoto,hediedin1986.LastlyinthepictureismybrotherJohn,wearingawhitevest,trousersandsuspenders.Heslicked(使光滑、順滑)backhisblackhairforthephototoappearintheperiodstyle.Hewasn'tsmilingeither.Theonlydifferenceisthatmycotaageispaintedbrownwithalargerporchandsomeadditionalbuildings.Myfatherlovedtobuildthingsandhewasconstantlyimprovingthecabin.Hebuiltadeckdownstairs,andalsoadockforhismanyboats.Healsodesignedaglidingswingandapicnictable.Allofthesephotographsremindmethatpeoplearenotsoverydifferent.Weallwanttoenjoylivingandbetogetherasafamily.Thetimethatfamiliesspendtogetherisveryvalauble.Thechildrenwilalwaysremeberthelittlethingsthattheirparentsdoforthem.FormeiswasmyDadthatshowedmeshesepicturesandtookthetimetotellmethestoriesbehindeachofthem.Ithankhimdearlyforthat.unit3thestoryofmyromanceTanyagotoutofthebedwhilethesunwasstillasleep.Shelookedoutthewindow;eventhestarswerelostinthedark."WouldIbeabletowatchsunrisetoday?"sheaskedherheart.Sheknewtheanswerbutwasafraidtotellherself.Mike,herhusbandwasstillinbedandsowereherfourkids.Eventheirsleepcouldn'teludeherfromdoingthemservice.Shehadtoorchestrateherworktothemicroscopicdetails.Frompressingclothestopolishingshoes,findingmatchingsockstoarrangingschoolbags,fixingupbreakfasttopreparingsnack-boxes,shewasunthankfullysupposedtomakeitallhappenlikeamagicwand.Andtoherowncompulsoryfault,shediditall;likeamagicwand.Liferanlikeawheel.Thecirclestartedeverymorningandendeduplateinthenight,andthenmorningappearedagain.Therewasnopause,norest,notevenaslightcurvetoinsertchange.Shecondemnedherselffornotexperiencingevenathoughtofevergettingoutofthiscircle.Shehadcommittedherselftotheorbitoflife.Comingoutofthebathroom,sheturnedandlookedatherbushedfaceinthemirrorandgaspedatiredanswertoherlongaskedquestion,"Never,youjustkeepdrivinginthesunset."Sheshookherheadtowingawaythoserebelliousbutterfliesinhermind.Sheknewshecouldn'tjointhemsoshedidn'twantthemtohangaroundhereither.SheenteredthekitchenhearingMike,yellinginhisdrowsyvoicefortheabsenceofhistowelinthebathroom.HeryoungestdaughterKarenstartedcryingforshedidn'twanttogotoschoolthatday.Nicole,theeldest,couldn'thelpherselfbuttoblameDanielfortheovernightfragmentationofherdollhouse.WhileRandalregisteredhisprotestfromhisbedthathewasnotgoingtodrinkmilkinbreakfastlikeeveryday.Whileinthekitchen,sugarhadrunoutandthelaundryseemedtohavebeenbreedingitself.Andshewasstilllookingforthatmagicwand.Shenevergottoknowwhenmorningranintonoon;eventheclockfailedtotellherthat.Mikeleftforofficestillscreamingandshoutingforhistowelandtheschoolbusonlyarrivedafterthekidshadputalltheirstuntsonthediningtable.Theirabsencecouldn'tceaseherworkfortheylefttheirincarnationsonherday.Shewascomparingthepileofhercouragetothatofthelaundrywhenthedoorbellrang.Ithadbeensolonganybodycomingtotheirhomethatshehadforgottenwhattheirdoorbellsoundedlike.Shetriedtoguesswhocoulditbebutnotasinglenameintervenedherthoughts.Sheopenedthedoorwithanuncertainhopeforasurprisefromthebluebutonlyfoundthepostmanstandinginthedoortovanishthatuncertainty."HiDavid!Sincewhendidyoustartringingthedoorbell?"wordsflewoutofhermouthwiththeirownconsent."EversinceIwasakid.OnlythatinmychildhoodIwouldringthebellandrunaway."Davidwasonehellofacheerfulpostman."Butyoudon'tneedtorunawaynow.""No,notuntilyouhavesignedandreceivedyouletter.""Myletter!Whocouldsendthat?""Iamnotsure,itssomeonenamedL.H.M.Soundslikeapostgraduatedegreetome.""Nevermind,I'llsignit."Tanyareceivedtheletter.Itwasaregisteredletterfromwithinthetown.ShewonderedwhocouldthatL.H.Mbe.Sheopenedtheenvelopeandthemysterythatenfoldedit.Thehandwritingsparkedamemorybutshefelttoooverwhelmedtoscrapeherpast.Herheartbeatstartedflyingonbutterflywings.Itwasn'tjustaletterwithordinarywordswrittenonapieceofpaper.Shecouldfeelthosewordsflutteringoverherheart.Theyweretellingherstoriesofherlonglostlove.MyfloweredwishTanya!Ioncesawmyhomeinthestreetsofyourpalm,mydestinyinthesmilesofyourpromises,andmyshelterintheshadowsofyoureyes.Itreasuredallyourwhispersundermypillow,yourfragranceinmybreaths,andyournameinmyears.Yourfacestilllightensuptheskyinthenight,yourvoicestillrhymestherainfall,andyourhairstillsoftenthewind.Thesunalwaysrosefromthecasementofyoureyes.Andthen,timeflewyouawayintosomeoneelse'sworld.ThatsunvanishedandeversinceIhaven'tseenasunrise.LifeisspendingmeandIamagingintoit.Dayskeepclimbingthemountainofyears.Moondrapesitsfaceinthecloudsandthenightrefusestobringsleepontomypillow.Ifightyourmemoriesanddefeatmyself.Thepain-wavesofyourabsencestormthroughmystaleheartandleaveitinavortex.Liferunslikeawheel.Thecirclestartseverymorningandendsuplateinthenight,andthenmorningappearsagain.Thereisnopause,norest,notevenaslightcurvetoturnintoachange.Myfacehaslivedwithmefortencoldwinters,nowIwanttofeelthewarmthofyouface.Bringthesunshineofyoureyestome.MeetmewhilethesunsetsthisSundayattheriverbridgewheredaysusetomeetnights.Myeyeswillbemeasuringthepassageuntilyoucome.LarryTheletterendedandleftherstandingatthedoorofhertime-fadedmemories.Larrywasherclassmateincollegedays.Helivedherheartandshedreamedhiseyes.TheyhadplannedtogetmarriedaftergraduationassoonasLarryfoundagoodjob.IttookhimayeartofindoneandthisexpansionoftimeletMikesurface.Mikewasanelegantandhandsomemanwithalreadyagoodjob.HeproposedTanyaandshe,tiredofwaitingforfreshair,steppedintothecloudswithMike.Larrygotafirst-ratejobthedayTanyagotmarried.Innextsixmonths,LarryleftthecountryandTanyamovedtoWisconsin.LifegotbusyinitsdetailsandLarrylivedinhermemorytoomuchthatsheforgottorememberhim.Mike'slovescatteredintohisjob,kidsandTanya.Shedidthesametohim,exceptforthejobthing.Herjobwastotakecareofthekidsandthehome."Easiersaidthandone"shelikedthisphraseeversince.Herjobimprisonedherwishesandshecouldn'tevenwishforherfreedom.Andtoday,aftermorethantenyears,alettercameintoherlifelikeabutterflycarryingonitswingswordswritteninrainbowcolors.ItwasWednesdayandshewishedtojumpoverthosethreedaysintotheSundaysunset.Shenevergottoknowwhenthekidscamebackfromtheschoolandhowshespenttherestoftheday.Thedayshadstartedflyingwithher.Inthenightshewouldreadthatlettertothemoon,thestarsandthebreeze.Shewouldtellthemstoriesofherlove;thefirsttimeshemetLarry,herfirstwordsandher--完整版學(xué)習(xí)資料分享 firstkiss.Everyinchofhermemoryhadabondtoawholenewmemoryitself.Nowsherememberedeverything;everyraythesuneverdecantedonherlove.Lifehadtakenarightturnonastraighthighwayofroutines.Theorbithadfinallybroken.Shecouldfeelapowerfulfreedomthatwasremovingthosemonotonousthoughtsfromhermindandinjectinglifeintoherveins.Lifewaswearinghopenow.ThetimefromSundaymorningtoeveningwashardtospend.Timeclockwassnailingoutofthedayandthesungothungupinmidair.Windstoppedonthesurfaceofwaterandtheshadowsdeclinedtoshrink.Shewishedtimewasahorsewithatailontheforeheadandshewouldpullitfromitstail.Shewishedtimewasadryleafandshewouldthroughitinthewindstormofherheart.Shewishedtimewasaboatandshewouldsailitintheriverofhereyes.Buttoday,timethathadalwaysbeenateachertoher,hadturnintoateaser.Itwasn'tbreathingatall,justholdingitsbreathandteasinghermore.Shewantedthetimetoflyanditwascrawling.Shetriedtomakeherselfbusyinhousechoresbuthereyesquitsupportingherhandsastheywerestilllookingatthesun.Andthesunalsokeptglaringather,allday.Finallythesunlostthebattleandstartedgoingdown.Fromtheventilator,ithadskidtothewindow.Nooneinthefamilyfeltanychangeinher.MikehadtogotomeetaclientandwasquitebusylookingathimselfandthekidsweretooinvolvedlookingattheTV.Itwasanhourtosunsetandshewasready,wearingherbestdressandwrappedinherfavoritefragrance.Shesurrenderedacoupleofyearsfromherfaceandbroughtbackafewyoungsmilesontoherlips."Whereareyougoingdear?"herpreparationcouldn'twageenoughresistanceagainstMike'scuriosity."Aa,well,actuallyIthoughtIwouldgoforsomeshopping"shehardlyuttered."Mom!Iwouldgowithyou."NicoleyelledastheideaofgoingouthadremovedherattentionfromtheTV.Therestweretooabsorbedtheydidn'tevenlistentheconversation."Yeahdear,whydon'tyoutakeNicolewithyou,shecouldbehelp."Tanyadidn'tfeelcomfortablehavingacompanyatthattimebutshedidn'twanttochangeMike'scuriosityintosuspicionsoshesaidOK.Allthewaytothecitycenter,Nicolekepttellingherofallthestuffherfriendshadandwhatshewantedtobuyinresponse.Tanyawasn'tlistening.ShewasjustshakingherheadinapprovalofwhateverNicolesaid.Shecouldn'tpossiblyhavesaidaword.Herheartwasrumblinglikeavolcano,hittingtheribcagetryingtogetouttotakealookatitslonglostlove.Thesunwashurryingdownnow.Shewasafraidofgettinglatesoshespeededupalittle."Mom!Aren'twesupposetogotoCityCenter?"Nicoleaskedseeingherturningtoadifferentstreet."YesdearbutIhavetotakecareofsomethingimportantbeforewegoshopping,allright?"shesaid."Allright."ItwasOKforNicoleaslongasitdidn'taltertheirshoppingplan.Thebridgewasgettingcloserandsowaslogic.Sanityhadstartedpenetratingherenthusiasm.Thequestionof"howshouldIdoit?"turnedinto"whyshouldIdoit?"Theeclipseofhermemorieshadstarteddeclining.Shecouldseethebridgenow.Shestoppedthecarahundredyardsawayfromthebridge."Honey!Youstayinthecar,I'llbebackinafewminutes."ShesaidtoNicolewithoutaslighttouchofemotions.Shedidn'twaitforheranswer,steppedoutofthecarinamechanicalwayandstartedwalkingtowardsthebridge.Larrywasstandingonthecornerofthebridge,withhisbacktoher.Hewaslookingdownthebridgeintotherunningwater.Shewalkedforafewyardsandthenstopped.Larryturnedhisfacetowardsher.Ageseemedtohavewornhimout.Helookedtiredasifhehadtraveledahugemileageofyears.Hispresencesentnowavesoffreshairtocleanherheartfromthemistofdissatisfaction.Hedisappointedheragain.Shehopedtofindarayofhopeandhedisappointedherhope.Shelookedbacktowardsthecaratherdaughter."Ihavetoomuchtolose,Idon'twanttolosemytenyears."shedecidedandturnedback.Larryranafterherbutshehadreachedhercar.Larrycalledherwithapassionatecry,"Tanya!"Sheopenedthedoorandsatin.Larrystoppedabruptly