Unit-6-Mrriage全新版大學(xué)英語(yǔ)綜合教程五課文翻譯

Unit6MrriageTextATheLegacy1'ForSissyMiller.'GilbertClandon,takingupthepearlbroochthatlayamongalitterofringsandbroochesonalittletableinhiswife'sdrawing-room,readtheinscription:'ForSissyMiller,withmylove.'2ItwaslikeAngelatohaverememberedevenSissyMiller,hersecretary.Yethowstrangeitwas,GilbertClandonthoughtoncemore,thatshehadlefteverythinginsuchorder—alittlegiftofsomesortforeveryoneofherfriends.Itwasasifshehadforeseenherdeath.Yetshehadbeeninperfecthealthwhensheleftthehousethatmorning,sixweeksago;whenshesteppedoffthekerbinPiccadillyandthecarhadkilledher.3HewaswaitingforSissyMiller.Hehadaskedhertocome;heowedher,hefelt,afteralltheyearsshehadbeenwiththem,thistokenofconsideration.Yes,hewenton,ashesattherewaiting,itwasstrangethatAngelahadlefteverythinginsuchorder.Everyfriendhadbeenleftsomelittletokenofheraffection.Everyring,everynecklace,everylittleChinesebox—shehadapassionforlittleboxes—hadanameonit.Tohim,ofcourse,shehadleftnothinginparticular,unlessitwereherdiary.Fifteenlittlevolumes,boundingreenleather,stoodbehindhimonherwritingtable.Eversincetheyweremarried,shehadkeptadiary.Someoftheirveryfew—hecouldnotcallthemquarrels,saytiffs—hadbeenaboutthatdiary.Whenhecameinandfoundherwriting,shealwaysshutitorputherhandoverit.'No,no,no,'hecouldhearhersay,'AfterI'mdead—perhaps.'Soshehadleftithim,asherlegacy.Itwastheonlythingtheyhadnotsharedwhenshewasalive.Buthehadalwaystakenitforgrantedthatshewouldoutlivehim.Ifonlyshehadstoppedonemoment,andhadthoughtwhatshewasdoing,shewouldbealivenow.Butshehadsteppedstraightoffthekerb,thedriverofthecarhadsaidattheinquest.Shehadgivenhimnochancetopullup...Herethesoundofvoicesinthehallinterruptedhim.4'MissMiller,Sir,'saidthemaid.5Shecamein.Shewasterriblydistressed,andnowonder.Angelahadbeenmuchmoretoherthananemployer.Shehadbeenafriend.Tohimself,hethought,ashepushedachairforherandaskedhertositdown,shewasscarcelydistinguishablefromanyotherwomanofherkind.TherewerethousandsofSissyMillers—drablittlewomeninblackcarryingattachécases.ButAngela,withhergeniusforsympathy,haddiscoveredallsortsofqualitiesinSissyMiller.Shewasthesoulofdiscretion,sosilent,sotrustworthy,onecouldtellheranything,andsoon.6MissMillercouldnotspeakatfirst.Shesattheredabbinghereyeswithherpockethandkerchief.Thenshemadeaneffort.7'Pardonme,MrClandon,'shesaid.8Hemurmured.Ofcourseheunderstood.Itwasonlynatural.Hecouldguesswhathiswifehadmeanttoher.9'I'vebeensohappyhere,'shesaid,lookinground.Hereyesrestedonthewritingtablebehindhim.Itwasheretheyhadworked—sheandAngela.ForAngelahadhershareofthedutiesthatfalltothelotofthewifeofaprominentpolitician,shehadbeenthegreatesthelptohiminhiscareer.HehadoftenseenherandSissysittingatthattable—Sissyatthetypewriter,takingdownlettersfromherdictation.NodoubtMissMillerwasthinkingofthat,too.Nowallhehadtodowastogiveherthebroochhiswifehadlefther.Aratherincongruousgiftitseemed.Itmighthavebeenbettertohaveleftherasumofmoney.Oreventhetypewriter.Butthereitwas—'ForSissyMiller,withmylove.'And,takingthebrooch,hegaveitherwiththelittlespeechthathehadprepared.Heknew,hesaid,thatshewouldvalueit.Hiswifehadoftenwornit...Andshereplied,asshetookit,almostasifshetoohadpreparedaspeech,thatitwouldalwaysbeatreasuredpossession....Shehad,hesupposed,otherclothesuponwhichapearlbroochwouldnotlookquitesoincongruous.Shewaswearingthelittleblackcoatandskirtthatseemedtheuniformofherprofession.Thenheremembered—shewasinmourning,ofcourse.Shetoohadhadhertragedy—abrother,towhomshewasdevoted,haddiedonlyaweekortwobeforeAngela.Insomeaccident,wasit?HecouldrememberonlyAngelatellinghim;Angela,withhergeniusforsympathy,hadbeenterriblyupset.MeanwhileSissyMillerhadrisen.Shewasputtingonhergloves.Evidentlyshefeltthatsheoughtnottointrude.Buthecouldnotlethergowithoutsayingsomethingaboutherfuture.Andsoheadded,ashepressedherhand.'Remember,MissMiller,ifthere'sanywayinwhichIcanhelpyou,itwillbeapleasure'Thenheopenedthedoor.Foramoment,onthethreshold,asifasuddenthoughthadstruckher,shestopped.10'MrClandon,'shesaid,lookingstraightathimforthefirsttime,andforthefirsttimehewasstruckbytheexpression,sympatheticyetsearching,inhereyes.'Ifatanytime,'shewassaying,'there'sanythingIcandotohelpyou,remember,Ishallfeelit,foryourwife'ssake,apleasure'11Withthatshewasgone.Herwordsandthelookthatwentwiththemwereunexpected.Itwasalmostasifshebelieved,orhoped,thathewouldhaveneedofher.Acurious,perhapsafantasticideaoccurredtohimashereturnedtohischair.Coulditbe,thatduringallthoseyearswhenhehadscarcelynoticedher,she,asthenovelistssay,hadentertainedapassionforhim?Hecaughthisownreflectionintheglassashepassed.Hewasoverfifty;buthecouldnothelpadmittingthathewasstill,asthelooking-glassshowedhim,averydistinguished-lookingman.12'PoorSissyMiller!'hesaid,halflaughing.Howhewouldhavelikedtosharethatjokewithhiswife!Heturnedinstinctivelytoherdiary.'Gilbert,'heread,openingitatrandom,'lookedsowonderful'Itwasasifshehadansweredhisquestion.Ofcourse,sheseemedtosay,you'reveryattractivetowomen.OfcourseSissyMillerfeltthattoo.Hereadon.'HowproudIamtobehiswife!'Andhehadalwaysbeenveryproudtobeherhusband.Howoftenwhentheydinedoutsomewherehehadlookedatheracrossthetableandsaidtohimself.Sheistheloveliestwomanhere!Hereadon.ThatfirstyearhehadbeenstandingforParliament.Theyhadtouredhisconstituency.'WhenGilbertsatdowntheapplausewasterrific.Thewholeaudienceroseandsang:"Forhe'sajollygoodfellow."Iwasquiteovercome.'Herememberedthat,too.Shehadbeensittingontheplatformbesidehim.Hecouldstillseetheglanceshecastathim,andhowshehadtearsinhereyes.Hereadonrapidly,fillinginsceneafterscenefromherscrappyfragments.'DinedattheHouseofCommonsToaneveningpartyattheLovegroves.DidIrealizemyresponsibility,LadyL.askedme,asGilbert'swife?'Thenastheyearspassed—hetookanothervolumefromthewritingtable—hehadbecomemoreandmoreabsorbedinhiswork.Andshe,ofcourse,wasmoreoftenalone.Ithadbeenagreatgrieftoher,apparently,thattheyhadhadnochildren.'HowIwish,'oneentryread,'thatGilberthadason!'Oddlyenoughhehadnevermuchregrettedthathimself.Lifehadbeensofull,sorichasitwas.Thatyearhehadbeengivenaminorpostinthegovernment.Aminorpostonly,buthercommentwas:'IamquitecertainnowthathewillbePrimeMinister!'Well,ifthingshadgonedifferently,itmighthavebeenso.Hepausedheretospeculateuponwhatmighthavebeen.Politicswasagamble,hereflected;butthegamewasn'toveryet.Notatfifty.Hecasthiseyesrapidlyovermorepages,fullofthelittletrifles,theinsignificant,happy,dailytriflesthathadmadeupherlife.13Hetookupanothervolumeandopeneditatrandom.'WhatacowardIam!Iletthechanceslipagain.Butitseemedselfishtobotherhimaboutmyownaffairs,whenhehassomuchtothinkabout.Andwesoseldomhaveaneveningalone.'Whatwasthemeaningofthat?Ohherewastheexplanation—itreferredtoherworkintheEastEnd.'IpluckedupcourageandtalkedtoGilbertatlast.Hewassokind,sogood.Hemadenoobjection.'Herememberedthatconversation.Shehadtoldhimthatshefeltsoidle,souseless.Shewishedtohavesomeworkofherown.Shewantedtodosomething—shehadblushedsoprettily,heremembered,asshesaiditsittinginthatverychair—tohelpothers.SoeveryWednesdayshewenttoWhitechapel.Herememberedhowhehatedtheclothessheworeonthoseoccasions.Butshehadtakenitveryseriouslyitseemed.Thediarywasfullofreferenceslikethis:'SawMrsJonesShehastenchildrenHusbandlosthisarminanaccident....DidmybesttofindajobforLily.'Heskippedon.Hisownnameoccurredlessfrequently.Hisinterestslackened.Someoftheentriesconveyednothingtohim.Forexample:'HadaheatedargumentaboutsocialismwithB.M.'WhowasB.M.?Hecouldnotfillintheinitials;somewoman,hesupposed,thatshehadmetononeofhercommittees.'B.M.madeaviolentattackupontheupperclasses....IwalkedbackafterthemeetingwithB.M.andtriedtoconvincehim.Butheissonarrow-minded.'SoB.M.wasaman—nodoubtoneofthose'intellectuals'astheycallthemselves,whoaresoviolent,asAngelasaid,andsonarrow-minded.Shehadinvitedhimtocomeandseeherapparently.'B.M.cametodinner.HeshookhandswithMinnie!'Thatnoteofexclamationgaveanothertwisttohismentalpicture.B.M.,itseemed,wasn'tusedtoparlour-maids:hehadshakenhandswithMinnie.Presumablyhewasoneofthosetameworkingmenwhoairtheirviewsinladies'drawing-rooms.Gilbertknewthetype,andhadnolikingforthisparticularspecimen,whoeverB.M.mightbe.Herehewasagain.'WentwithB.M.totheTowerofLondonHesaidrevolutionisboundtocome....HesaidweliveinaFool'sparadise.'ThatwasjustthekindofthingB.M.wouldsay—Gilbertcouldhearhim.Hecouldalsoseehimquitedistinctly—astubbylittleman,witharoughbeard,redtie,dressedastheyalwaysdidintweeds,whohadneverdoneanhonestday'sworkinhislife.SurelyAngelahadthesensetoseethroughhim?Hereadon.'B.M.saidsomeverydisagreeablethingsabout....'Thenamewascarefullyscratchedout.'Iwouldnotlistentoanymoreabuseof....'Againthenamewasobliterated.Couldithavebeenhisownname?WasthatwhyAngelacoveredthepagesoquicklywhenhecamein?ThethoughtaddedtohisgrowingdislikeofB.M.Hehadhadtheimpertinencetodiscusshiminthisveryroom.WhyhadAngelanevertoldhim?Itwasveryunlikehertoconcealanything;shehadbeenthesoulofcandour.Heturnedthepages,pickingouteveryreferencetoB.M.'B.M.toldmethestoryofhischildhood.HismotherwentoutcharringWhenIthinkofit,IcanhardlybeartogoonlivinginsuchluxuryThreeguineasforonehat!'Ifonlyshehaddiscussedthematterwithhim,insteadofpuzzlingherpoorlittleheadaboutquestionsthatweremuchtoodifficultforhertounderstand!Hehadlentherbooks.KarlMarx.'TheComingRevolution.'TheinitialsB.M.,B.M.,B.M.,recurredrepeatedly.Butwhyneverthefullname?Hereadon.'B.M.cameunexpectedlyafterdinner.Luckily,Iwasalone.'Thatwasonlyayearago.'Luckily'—whyluckily?—'Iwasalone.'Wherehadhebeenthatnight?Hecheckedthedateinhisengagementbook.IthadbeenthenightoftheMansionHousedinner.AndB.M.andAngelahadspenttheeveningalone!Hetriedtorecallthatevening.Wasshewaitingupforhimwhenhecameback?Hadtheroomlookedjustasusual?Werethereglassesonthetable?Werethechairsdrawnclosetogether?Hecouldremembernothing—nothingwhatever.Itbecamemoreandmoreinexplicabletohim—thewholesituation:hiswifereceivinganunknownmanalone.Perhapsthenextvolumewouldexplain.Hastilyhereachedforthelastofthediaries—theoneshehadleftunfinishedwhenshedied.Thereontheveryfirstpagewasthatcursedfellowagain.'DinedalonewithB.MHebecameveryagitated.HesaiditwastimeweunderstoodeachotherItriedtomakehimlisten.Buthewouldnot.HethreatenedthatifIdidnot...'therestofthepagewasscoredover.Hecouldnotmakeoutasingleword;buttherecouldbeonlyoneinterpretation:thescoundrelhadaskedhertobecomehismistress.Aloneinhisroom!ThebloodrushedtoGilbertClandon'sface.Heturnedthepagesrapidly.Whathadbeenheranswer?Initialshadceased.Itwassimply'he'now.'Hecameagain.ItoldhimIcouldnotcometoanydecisionIimploredhimtoleaveme.'Hehadforcedhimselfuponherinthisveryhouse?Butwhyhadn'tshetoldhim?Howcouldshehavehesitatedforaninstant?Then:'Iwrotehimaletter.'Thenpageswereleftblank.Thentherewasthis:'Noanswertomyletter.'Thenmoreblankpages:andthenthis:'Hehasdonewhathethreatened.'Afterthat—whatcameafterthat?Heturnedpageafterpage.Allwereblank.Butthere,ontheverydaybeforeherdeath,wasthisentry:'HaveIthecouragetodoittoo?'Thatwastheend.14GilbertClandonletthebookslidetothefloor.Hecouldseeherinfrontofhim.ShewasstandingonthekerbinPiccadilly.Hereyesstared;herfistswereclenched.Herecamethecar...15Hecouldnotbearit.Hemustknowthetruth.Hestrodetothetelephone.16'MissMiller!'Therewassilence.Thenheheardsomeonemovingintheroom.17'SissyMillerspeaking'—hervoiceatlastansweredhim.18'Who,'hethundered,'isB.M.?'19Hecouldhearthecheapclocktickingonhermantelpiece:thenalongdrawnsigh.Thenatlastshesaid:20'Hewasmybrother.'21Hewasherbrother;herbrotherwhohadkilledhimself.22'Isthere,'heheardSissyMillerasking,'anythingthatIcanexplain?'23'Nothing!'hecried.'Nothing!'24Hehadreceivedhislegacy.Shehadtoldhimthetruth.Shehadsteppedoffthekerbtorejoinherlover.Shehadsteppedoffthekerbtoescapefromhim.遺贈(zèng)物弗吉妮婭·伍爾芙“給西瑟·米勒?！奔獱柌亍た颂m登拿起放在太太客廳小桌子上那一堆戒指和胸針中的那枚珍珠胸針，念著上面的字：“給西瑟·米勒，謹(jǐn)致愛(ài)意?！彼B自己的秘書(shū)西瑟·米勒都記在心里，安吉拉就是這樣的人?？啥嗥婀郑獱柌亍た颂m登又一次想著，她居然把一切都安排得那么井然有序——每一位朋友都有一件小小的禮物。似乎她預(yù)見(jiàn)到了自己的死?？墒?，六個(gè)星期前，她在那天上午離家時(shí)身體很好,正當(dāng)她走下皮卡迪利大街的人行道時(shí)，一輛汽車把她撞死。他在等西瑟·米勒。他請(qǐng)她來(lái)的。他覺(jué)得她與他們夫婦倆相處了那么多年，自己應(yīng)當(dāng)以這種方式表示關(guān)心。真的，他坐在那兒等著，心里還在想，安吉拉把一切安排得這么井然有序，是很奇怪。每個(gè)朋友都得到一份代表她的情誼的小小禮物。每一枚戒指，每一串項(xiàng)鏈，每一個(gè)小巧的中國(guó)盒——她對(duì)小巧的盒子情有獨(dú)鐘——都有個(gè)名字附在上面。當(dāng)然，她沒(méi)給他留下什么特別的物品，除非是她的那些日記。15本小本子，用綠色皮面裝幀，全都擺放在他身后的書(shū)桌上?；楹笏烷_(kāi)始記日記了。兩人偶有的——稱不上爭(zhēng)吵，只能說(shuō)是別扭——都是為了這些日記。每當(dāng)他走進(jìn)房間看到她在寫(xiě)，她總是合上本子，或用手按著?！安唬恍?，不行，”他會(huì)聽(tīng)到她說(shuō)，“也許，等我死后吧?！本瓦@樣，她把日記作為遺物留給了他。這是她生前夫婦倆惟一不曾共同擁有的東西。不過(guò)他一直認(rèn)為自己一定會(huì)先走。只要她停頓片刻，想一想自己在干什么，此刻她就依然在這世上?？伤龔街弊呦氯诵械?，在接受調(diào)查時(shí)那位駕車者這么說(shuō)。她令他措手不及……就在這時(shí)，大廳里的說(shuō)話聲打斷了他的思緒?！懊桌招〗銇?lái)了，先生，”女仆說(shuō)。她走了進(jìn)來(lái)。她極為悲傷，這也難怪。安吉拉不僅僅是她的雇主。還是她的朋友。在他自己看來(lái)，他一邊暗自想著，一邊為她拉過(guò)一張椅子，請(qǐng)她坐下，她和所有像她這種身份的人幾乎沒(méi)有什么區(qū)別。有成千上萬(wàn)個(gè)西瑟?米勒——毫無(wú)情趣的小婦人，身穿緇衣，手提公文包?？商焐鷷?huì)同情人的安吉拉在西瑟?米勒身上發(fā)現(xiàn)了種種優(yōu)良品質(zhì)。她十分謹(jǐn)慎，守口如瓶，值得信任，你什么話都可以對(duì)她說(shuō)，等等。米勒小姐開(kāi)始時(shí)說(shuō)不出話來(lái)。她坐在那兒用手帕輕拭眼睛。接著她定了定神?！罢?qǐng)?jiān)?，克蘭登先生，”她說(shuō)。他含糊應(yīng)了一聲。他當(dāng)然明白。這太自然了。他想像得出妻子對(duì)她意味著什么?！拔以谶@里一向非常愉快，”她說(shuō)著，環(huán)顧四周。她的目光落在他身后的書(shū)桌上。她倆就是在這里工作的——她和安吉拉。因?yàn)榘布缲?fù)著政要夫人應(yīng)該承擔(dān)的各種責(zé)任，在他的政治生涯中她給了他極大的幫助。他經(jīng)常看見(jiàn)她和西瑟坐在這張書(shū)桌旁——西瑟把她口授的信件用打字機(jī)打出。不用說(shuō)，米勒小姐也在想這些往事?，F(xiàn)在他所要做的就是把太太留給她的胸針交給她。這件禮物似乎不太合適。還不如給她一筆錢(qián)呢。即便那臺(tái)打字機(jī)也更合適些?？墒嵌Y物早已安排好了——“給西瑟?米勒，謹(jǐn)致愛(ài)意?！彼弥蒯?，交給她時(shí)講了幾句事先想好的話。他深知，他說(shuō)，她會(huì)珍惜這枚胸針。他夫人生前經(jīng)常佩戴它……她接過(guò)胸針時(shí)回答說(shuō)，簡(jiǎn)直也像事先準(zhǔn)備過(guò)似的，它永遠(yuǎn)是件珍愛(ài)之物……他猜想她有別的跟這枚珍珠胸針更相配的衣服。她身上穿著黑衣黑裙，像是她那種職業(yè)的人穿的制服。他隨即想起，她是穿著喪服，沒(méi)錯(cuò)。她自己也遇到了傷心事——她一向愛(ài)著的一位兄弟，在安吉拉之前的一兩個(gè)星期去世了。好像是什么意外？他只記得安吉拉跟自己說(shuō)過(guò)；天生會(huì)同情人的安吉拉為此非常難過(guò)。他這么想著時(shí)西瑟?米勒已經(jīng)站了起來(lái)。她正在戴手套。顯然她覺(jué)得自己不該打擾?？墒牵荒軐?duì)她的將來(lái)不表示一下關(guān)心就讓她走。于是他一邊說(shuō)，一邊緊緊握著她的手?！罢?qǐng)記住，米勒小姐，若需幫助盡管開(kāi)口，本人定當(dāng)效勞……”說(shuō)著，他打開(kāi)門(mén)。剎那間，她似乎突然想到了什么，在門(mén)口停了下來(lái)?！翱颂m登先生，”她說(shuō)，目光第一次直視著他，他第一次為她的眼神暗暗吃驚，既流露出同情又十分銳利?！叭绻裁磿r(shí)候，”她說(shuō)道，“有什么事我能幫上忙，請(qǐng)記住，為了夫人，我會(huì)很高興為您效勞……”說(shuō)完她走了。她的話，還有說(shuō)話時(shí)的神態(tài)真是出乎意料。就好像她以為，或者希望，自己會(huì)需要她。他坐回到椅子里時(shí)，產(chǎn)生了一個(gè)離奇的，甚或是荒唐的念頭。會(huì)不會(huì)，那么多年來(lái)，雖然自己很少注意過(guò)她，她卻像那些小說(shuō)家寫(xiě)的那樣對(duì)自己暗生情愫？他走過(guò)鏡子時(shí)瞄了一眼鏡子中的自己。他已經(jīng)年過(guò)半百，可他不得不承認(rèn)，自己依舊儀表堂堂，就像剛才鏡子里看到的那樣。“可憐的西瑟?米勒!”他說(shuō)著，微微一笑。他多想能把這件趣事講給太太聽(tīng)!他下意識(shí)地取過(guò)她的日記。“吉爾伯特，”他信手翻開(kāi)來(lái)讀道，“看上去真英俊……”簡(jiǎn)直就像是她回答了自己的問(wèn)題。沒(méi)錯(cuò)，她仿佛在說(shuō)，你讓女人著迷。當(dāng)然，西瑟?米勒也有同感。他接著讀下去?！俺蔀樗奶腋械教珮s幸了!”而他也一向以做她的丈夫?yàn)闃s。多少次，兩人外出就餐，他望著對(duì)座的她，暗自說(shuō)。這兒數(shù)她最楚楚動(dòng)人。他接著讀?；楹蟮谝荒晁?jìng)選議員。兩人一起在選區(qū)訪問(wèn)。“吉爾伯特坐下時(shí)，掌聲雷動(dòng)。聽(tīng)眾全體起立，高唱著：‘他是個(gè)大好人。’我感動(dòng)萬(wàn)分?！彼灿浧鹆诉@事。她和自己并肩坐在臺(tái)上。他仍記得她向自己投來(lái)的目光，記得她兩眼噙著淚水。他快速讀下去，她那些零亂的片斷一幕幕涌入他的腦海?！霸谙伦h院就餐……前往洛夫格羅夫府參加晚會(huì)。作為吉爾伯特的太太，洛夫格羅夫夫人問(wèn)我，我可曾意識(shí)到身負(fù)的責(zé)任？”光陰一年年逝去——他從書(shū)桌上取過(guò)另一本日記簿——他越來(lái)越專注于工作。而她，獨(dú)處的時(shí)間自然也越來(lái)越多。他倆沒(méi)孩子，顯然她對(duì)此深感悲傷。“我多希望，”有一天的日記里寫(xiě)著，“吉爾伯特有個(gè)兒子!”奇怪的是，他本人從不怎么以此為憾事。生活那么豐富，那么充實(shí)，的確如此。那年派給了他一個(gè)無(wú)足輕重的政府中的職務(wù)。一個(gè)小職位而已，可她的評(píng)論竟然是：“現(xiàn)在我相信他會(huì)當(dāng)上首相!”嗯，如果情況朝另外的方向發(fā)展，或許果真如此了。他略略停頓，思忖著事情的進(jìn)展或許會(huì)如何不同。政治就是一場(chǎng)賭博，他想；可這游戲還沒(méi)完呢。年方五十還有機(jī)會(huì)。他目光飛快地掠過(guò)一頁(yè)又一頁(yè)日記，都是些瑣碎小事，那些構(gòu)成她生活的無(wú)關(guān)緊要的快樂(lè)瑣事。他又取過(guò)一本，信手翻開(kāi)。“我真是個(gè)懦夫!我又讓機(jī)會(huì)溜走了?？墒牵心敲炊嗍乱紤]，而我卻用自己的事去打攪他，而且我倆很少有機(jī)會(huì)單獨(dú)在一起度過(guò)一個(gè)夜晚，這未免太自私了?！边@話是什么意思？哦這里有說(shuō)明——指的是她在倫敦東區(qū)的工作?！拔夜钠鹩職?，終于跟吉爾伯特談了。他真好，太好了。他一點(diǎn)也不反對(duì)。”他記起了那次談話。她跟他說(shuō)她覺(jué)得無(wú)所事事，像個(gè)廢物。她希望能做點(diǎn)事。她想做些什么——她漲紅著臉，那么可愛(ài)，他回想起來(lái)了，她說(shuō)話時(shí)就坐在那張椅子里——去幫助別人。于是，她每星期三去懷特查普爾。他回想起來(lái)，自己是多么討厭她去那兒時(shí)的穿戴?？煽磥?lái)她還真把這當(dāng)一回事。日記里提到的全是這類事：“見(jiàn)到瓊斯太太……她有十個(gè)孩子……丈夫在事故中失去了一條手臂……盡我的努力給莉莉找了個(gè)工作?！彼焖贋g覽著。自己的名字出現(xiàn)得少了。他的興趣也不大了。有些記載他讀了覺(jué)得莫名其妙。比如：“與B.M.就社會(huì)主義展開(kāi)了激烈爭(zhēng)論。”誰(shuí)是B.M.？他光看首字母猜不出來(lái)；是某位女士，他猜想，是她在某個(gè)委員會(huì)里認(rèn)識(shí)的?！癇.M.對(duì)上層社會(huì)大加抨擊……會(huì)后我和B.M.一起步行回來(lái)，我想說(shuō)服他?？伤枷腭郦M?！本褪钦f(shuō)B.M.是個(gè)男的——肯定就是自稱“知識(shí)分子”的那類人，言詞非常激烈，就像安吉拉說(shuō)的那樣，而且思想十分褊狹。顯然是她邀請(qǐng)他來(lái)訪?！癇.M.前來(lái)赴宴。他竟然與明妮握手!”這句話的驚嘆語(yǔ)氣使他對(duì)此人的印象更糟了。B.M.可能沒(méi)見(jiàn)識(shí)過(guò)客廳女仆：他竟然與明妮握了手。大概他是那種聽(tīng)使喚的工人，在夫人小姐的起居室里發(fā)表自己的看法。吉爾伯特見(jiàn)識(shí)過(guò)那種人，且不論這位B.M.究竟是何許人，他對(duì)這人全無(wú)好感。又寫(xiě)到這人?！昂虰.M.一起去倫敦塔……他說(shuō)革命必將來(lái)臨……他說(shuō)我們陶醉在虛無(wú)縹緲的樂(lè)境之中?！边@是B.M.常說(shuō)的那種話——吉爾伯特完全料得到。他還能清楚地看到他的樣子——一個(gè)矮矮胖胖的小男人，胡子拉茬，系著紅色領(lǐng)帶，穿著他們這種人天天穿的粗花呢衣服，一輩子從沒(méi)干過(guò)一天正經(jīng)活兒。安吉拉總該有頭腦看穿這種人吧？他往下讀?！癇.M.說(shuō)了些很難聽(tīng)的話，是有關(guān)……”名字被小心翼翼地劃掉了。“我再也不想聽(tīng)這些對(duì)……的詆毀之詞了。”名字又被劃掉了。會(huì)不會(huì)是他自己的名字？會(huì)不會(huì)就為這個(gè)安吉拉在他進(jìn)來(lái)時(shí)急急忙忙地把本子遮住？這一想法越發(fā)加深了他對(duì)B.M.的厭惡。他如此放肆，竟然就在這個(gè)房間里議論起他來(lái)了。可安吉拉怎么從沒(méi)跟自己說(shuō)起呢？她才不會(huì)對(duì)他隱瞞什么呢；她是直率誠(chéng)懇的化身。他一頁(yè)頁(yè)翻著，找出提及B.M.的文句?！癇.M.跟我講了他童年的事。他母親到別人家里干雜活……想到這一點(diǎn)，我真不愿繼續(xù)過(guò)如此奢侈的生活……一頂帽子就花去三幾尼!”她只要跟自己談?wù)勥@事就好了，用不著讓她那可憐的小腦袋為這種她理解不了的事而煩惱嘛!他借書(shū)給她看?？?馬克思?！都磳?lái)臨的革命》。B.M.，B.M.，B.M.的縮寫(xiě)一再重復(fù)出現(xiàn)?？蔀槭裁床挥萌兀克伦x。“晚餐后B.M.未經(jīng)邀請(qǐng)自己來(lái)了。幸好我一人在家?！蹦遣贿^(guò)是一年前的事?！靶液谩薄獮槭裁葱液?？——“我一人在家?！弊约耗翘焱砩先ツ睦锪?？他查了查約會(huì)簿里的日期。那個(gè)晚上是去市長(zhǎng)官邸赴宴。B.M.和安吉拉那天晚上單獨(dú)在一起!他試圖回憶那晚的情形。他回家時(shí)她有沒(méi)有在等他？屋子里看上去跟平時(shí)一樣嗎？桌上有沒(méi)有杯子？椅子有沒(méi)有靠在一起？他什么也回想不起來(lái)——一點(diǎn)都想不起來(lái)了。這事變得越來(lái)越莫名其妙——整個(gè)事件：太太獨(dú)自一人接待一個(gè)陌生男子。也許下一本日記能解釋一切。他急急抓過(guò)最后一本日記簿——她生前沒(méi)記完的那本。第一頁(yè)赫然在目的又是那該死的家伙?！耙粋€(gè)人與B.M.進(jìn)餐……他非常激動(dòng)。他說(shuō)咱倆該相互理解了……我想讓他聽(tīng)我說(shuō)?？伤宦?tīng)。他威脅說(shuō)要是我不……”這一頁(yè)其余的文字全都被涂抹掉了。他一個(gè)字也無(wú)法辨認(rèn)；可只有一個(gè)解釋：那個(gè)混蛋要她做他的情人。兩人單獨(dú)在他的房間!熱血涌上了吉爾伯特?克蘭登的臉。他快速地一頁(yè)頁(yè)翻過(guò)去。她怎么回答的呢？首字母不見(jiàn)了?，F(xiàn)在干脆只說(shuō)“他”了?！八謥?lái)了。我告訴他我做不了決定。我懇求他離開(kāi)我?！彼驮谶@所房子里迫她就范？可是為什么她不跟自己說(shuō)呢？她用得著片刻猶豫嗎？下面：“我給他寫(xiě)了一封信?！焙竺鎺醉?yè)都是空白。接著有這么一句話：“沒(méi)有回信。”后面又是空白，接著是：“他把威脅付之行動(dòng)了?！蹦且院蟆且院笤趺戳?？他一頁(yè)一頁(yè)地翻著。都是空白?？墒牵驮谒鍪碌那耙惶?，寫(xiě)著這么一句：“我有勇氣也這么做嗎？”日記終止了。吉爾伯特?克蘭登聽(tīng)任日記本滑落到地上。他能看到她在他眼前。她站在皮卡迪利大街的人行道上。她凝視著前方，緊握著雙拳。車開(kāi)過(guò)來(lái)了……他無(wú)法再忍受了。他必須了解真相。他大步走到電話機(jī)旁?！懊桌招〗?”沒(méi)有聲音。接著他聽(tīng)見(jiàn)房間里有人在走動(dòng)?！拔沂俏魃?米勒”——總算聽(tīng)到她來(lái)接電話了?！暗降渍l(shuí)，”他吼道，“是B.M.？”他聽(tīng)得見(jiàn)她壁爐架上那座廉價(jià)鐘的滴答聲，接著是一聲長(zhǎng)長(zhǎng)的嘆息。最后她回答說(shuō)：“他是我兄弟?！蹦鞘撬值埽亲詺⒌男值?。“有什么，”他聽(tīng)到西瑟?米勒在說(shuō)，“要我解釋的嗎？”“沒(méi)有!”他喊道?！皼](méi)有!”他得到了屬于自己的遺贈(zèng)。她把真相告訴了他。她走下人行道與情人重新團(tuán)聚。她走下人行道從自己身邊逃逸。TextBWhyMarriagesFailAnneRoiphe1Thesedayssomanymarriagesendindivorcethatourmostsacredvowsnolongerringwithtruth.“Happilyeverafter”and“Tilldeathdouspart”areexpressionsthatseemonthewaytobecomingobsolete.Whyhasitbecomesohardforcouplestostaytogether?Whatgoeswrong?Whathashappenedtousthatclosetoone-halfofallmarriagesaredestinedforthedivorcecourts?Howcouldwehavecreatedasocietyinwhich42percentofoutchildrenwillgrowupinsingle-parenthomes?Eventhougheachbrokenmarriageisunique,wecanstillfindthecommonperils,thecommoncausesformaritaldespair.Eachmarriagehascrisispointsandeachmarriagetestsendurance,thecapacityforbothintimacyandchange.Outsidepressuressuchasjobloss,illness,infertility,troublewithachild,careofagingparentsandalltheotherplaguesoflifehitmarriagethewayhurricanesblastourshores.Somemarriagessurvivethesestormsandothersdon’t.Marriagesfail,however,notsimplybecauseoftheoutsideweatherbutbecausetheinnerclimatebecomestoohotortoocold,tooturbulentortoostupefying.2Whenwelookathowwechooseourpartnersandwhatexpectationsexistatthetenderbeginningsofromance,someofthereasonsfordisasterbecomequiteclear.Weallselectwithunconsciousaccuracyamatewhowillrecreatewithustheemotionalpatternsofourfirsthomes.Dr.CarlA.Whitaker,amaritaltherapistandemeritusprofessorofpsychiatryattheUniversityofWisconsin,explains,“Fromearlychildhoodon,eachofuscarriedmodelsformarriage,femininity,masculinity,motherhood,fatherhoodandalltheotherfamilyroles.”Eachofusfallsinlovewithamatewhohasqualitiesofourparents,whowillhelpusrediscoverboththepsychologicalhappinessandmiseriesofourpastlives.WemaythinkwehavefoundamanunlikeDad,butthenheturnstodrinkordrugs,orloseshisjoboverandoveragainorsitssilentlyinfrontoftheTVjustthewayDaddid.Amanmaychooseawomanwhodoesn’tlikekidsjustlikehismotherorwhogamblesawaythefamilysavingsjustlikehismother.Orhemaychooseaslenderwifewhoseemsunlikehisobesemotherbutthenturnsouttohaveotheraddictionsthatdestroytheirmutualhappiness.3Amanandawomanbringtotheirmarriagebedablendedconcoctionofconsciousandunconsciousmemoriesoftheirparents’livestogether.Thehumanwayistocompulsivelyrepeatandrecreatethepatternsofthepast.SigmundFreudsowelldescribedtheunhappydesignthatmanyofusgettrappedin:theunmetneedsofchildhood,theangryfeelingsleftoverfromfrustrationsoflongago,thelimitsoftrustandtherecurrenceofoldfears.Onceanindividualsensesthisentrapment,theremayfollowayearningtoescape,andtheresultcouldbeabroken,splinteredmarriage.4Ofcoursepeoplecanovercomethehabitsandattitudesthatdevelopedinchildhood.Weallhavehiddenstrengthsandamazingcapacitiesforgrowthandcreativechange.Change,however,requireswork—observingyourpartinarottenpattern,bringingdifficultiesoutintotheopen—andworkrunscountertothebasicmythofmarriage:“WhenIwedthispersonallmyproblemswillbeover.IwillhaveachievedsuccessandIwillbecomethecenteroflifeforthisotherpersonandthispersonwillbemycenter,andwewillmeaneverythingtoeachotherforever.”Thismyth,whicheverymarriagerelieson,issoonexposed.Thecomingofchildren,thepullsandtugsoftheirdemandsonaffectionandtime,placeaconsiderablestrainonthatbasicmythofmeaningeverythingtoeachother,ormergingtogetherandsolvingalloflife’sproblems.5Concernandtensionaboutmoneytakeeachpartnerawayfromtheother.Obligationstodemandingparentsorstill-depended-uponparentscreatefurtherstrain.Couplestodaymustalsodealwithalltheculturalchangesbroughtoninrecentyearsbythewomen’smovementandthesexualrevolution.Thealteringofrolesandtheshiftingofresponsibilitieshavebeenextremelytrying[trying:difficultorannoying;hardtodealwith]formanymarriages.6Theseandotherrealitiesoflifeerodethevisionsofmaritalblissthewaysandstormseatatrockandtheoceannibblesawayatthedunes.Thoseeuphoric,grandfeelingsthataccompanyromanticlovearereallyself-delusions,self-hypnoticdreamsthatenableustoforgearelationship.Reallife,failureatwork,disappointments,exhaustion,badsmells,badcoldsandhardtimesallpuncturethedreamandleaveusstrandedwithourmate,withourchildhoodpatternspushingusthiswayandthat,withourunfulfilledexpectations.7Thestruggletosurviveinmarriagerequiresadaptability,flexibility,genuineloveandkindnessandanimaginationstrongenoughtofeelwhattheotherisfeeling.Manymarriagesfallapartbecauseeitherpartnercannotimaginewhattheotherwantsorcannotcommunicatewhatheorsheneedsorfeels.Angerbuildsuntiliteruptsintoavolcanicburstthatburiesthemarriageinash.8Itisnothardtosee,therefore,howessentialcommunicationisforagoodmarriage.Amanandawomanmustbeabletotelleachotherhowtheyfeelandwhytheyfeelthewaytheydo;otherwisetheywillimposeoneachotherrolesandactionsthatleadtofurtherunhappiness.Insomecases,thecommunicationpatternsofchildhood—ofnottalking,oftalkingtoomuch,ofnotlistening,ofdistrustandanger,orwithdrawal—spillintothemarriageandpreventahealthyexchangeofthoughtsandfeelings.Theansweristosetupnewpatternsofcommunicationandintimacy.9Atthesametime,however,wemustseeeachotherasindividuals.“Toachieveabalancebetweenseparatenessandclosenessisoneofthemajorpsychologicaltasksofallhumanbeingsateverystageoflife,”saysDr.StuartBartle,apsychiatristattheNewYorkUniversityMedicalCenter.10Ifwesensefromourmateaneedfortoomuchintimacy,wetendtopushhimorheraway,fearingthatwemayloseouridentitiesinthemergingofmarriage.Onepartnermaysuffocatetheotherpartnerinachildlikedependency.11Agoodmarriagemeansgrowingasacouplebutalsogrowingasindividuals.Thisisn’teasy.Richardgivesuphisinterestincarpentrybecausehiswife,Helen,isjealousofthetimehespendsawayfromher.Karenquitsherchoirgroupbecauseherhusbanddislikesthefriendsshemakesthere.Eachpairclingstoeachotherandareangrywitheachotheraslifeclosesinonthem.Thiskindofmaritalbalanceiseasilythrownasoneortheotherpullsawayanddivorcefollows.12Sometimespeoplepretendthatanewpartnerwillsolvetheoldproblems.Mostoftenextramaritalsexdestroysamarriagebecauseitallowsanartificialsplitbetweenthegoodandthebad—thegoodisprojectedonthenewpartnerandthebadisdumpedontheheadoftheold.Dishonesty,hidingandcheatingcreatewallsbetweenmenandwomen.Infidelityisjustasymptomoftrouble.Itisasymboliccomplaint,aweaponofrevenge,aswellasanunravelerofcloseness.Infidelityisoftenthatproverbiallaststrawthatsinksthecameltotheground.13Allright—marriagehasalwaysbeendifficult.Whythenareweseeingsomanydivorcesatthistime?Yes,ourmodernsocialfabricisthin,andyes,thepermissivenessofsocietyhascreatedunrealisticexpectationsandthrownthefamilyintochaos.Butdivorceissocommonbecausepeopletodayareunwillingtoexercisetheself-disciplinethatmarriagerequires.Theyexpecteasyjoy,liketheentertainmentonTV,thethrillofagoodparty.14Marriagetakessomekindofsacrifice,notdreadfulself-sa