老友記第一季第一集中英文對照臺詞

-.z.101TheOneWhereMonicaGetsaNewRoommate(ThePilot-TheUncutVersion)[Scene:CentralPerk,Chandler,Joey,Phoebe,andMonicaarethere.]Monica:There'snothingtotell!He'sjustsomeguyIworkwith!Joey:eon,you'regoingoutwiththeguy!There'sgottabesomethingwrongwithhim!Chandler:AllrightJoey,benice.

Sodoeshehaveahump"Ahumpandahairpiece"Phoebe:Wait,doesheeatchalk"(Theyallstare,bemused.)Phoebe:Just,'cause,Idon'twanthertogothroughwhatIwentthroughwithCarl-oh!Monica:Okay,everybodyrela*.Thisisnotevenadate.It'sjusttwopeoplegoingouttodinnerand-nothavingse*.Chandler:Soundslikeadatetome.[TimeLapse]Chandler:Alright,soI'mbackinhighschool,I'mstandinginthemiddleofthecafeteria,andIrealizeIamtotallynaked.All:Oh,yeah.Hadthatdream.Chandler:ThenIlookdown,andIrealizethere'saphone...there.Joey:Insteadof..."Chandler:That'sright.Joey:Neverhadthatdream.Phoebe:No.Chandler:Allofasudden,thephonestartstoring.NowIdon'tknowwhattodo,everybodystartslookingatme.Monica:Andtheyweren'tlookingatyoubefore"!Chandler:Finally,IfigureI'dbetteranswerit,anditturnsoutit'smymother,whichisvery-veryweird,because-shenevercallsme![TimeLapse,Rosshasentered.]Ross:(mortified)Hi.Joey:Thisguysayshello,Iwannakillmyself.Monica:Areyouokay,sweetie"Ross:Ijustfeellikesomeonereacheddownmythroat,grabbedmysmallintestine,pulleditoutofmymouthandtieditaroundmyneck...Chandler:Cookie"Monica:(e*plainingtotheothers)Carolmovedherstuffouttoday.Joey:Ohh.Monica:(toRoss)Letmegetyousomecoffee.Ross:Thanks.Phoebe:Ooh!Oh!(ShestartstopluckattheairjustinfrontofRoss.)Ross:No,nodon't!Stopcleansingmyaura!No,justleavemyauraalone,okay"Phoebe:Fine!

Bemurky!Ross:I'llbefine,alright"Really,everyone.Ihopeshe'llbeveryhappy.Monica:Noyoudon't.Ross:NoIdon't,tohellwithher,sheleftme!Joey:Andyouneverknewshewasalesbian...Ross:No!!Okay"!Whydoeseveryonekeepfi*atingonthat"Shedidn'tknow,howshouldIknow"Chandler:SometimesIwishIwasalesbian...(Theyallstareathim.)DidIsaythatoutloud"Ross:Itoldmomanddadlastnight,theyseemedtotakeitprettywell.Monica:Ohreally,sothathystericalphonecallIgotfromawomanatsobbing3:00A.M.,"I'llneverhavegrandchildren,I'llneverhavegrandchildren."waswhat"

Awrongnumber"Ross:Sorry.Joey:AlrightRoss,look.You'refeelingalotofpainrightnow.You'reangry.You'rehurting.CanItellyouwhattheansweris"(Rossgestureshisconsent.)Joey:Stripjoint!C'mon,you'resingle!Havesomehormones!Ross:Idon'twanttobesingle,okay"Ijust...Ijust-Ijustwannabemarriedagain!(Rachelentersinawetweddingdressandstartstosearchtheroom.)Chandler:AndIjustwantamilliondollars!(Hee*tendshishandhopefully.)Monica:Rachel"!Rachel:OhGodMonicahi!ThankGod!Ijustwenttoyourbuildingandyouweren'tthereandthenthisguywithabighammersaidyoumightbehereandyouare,youare!Waitress:CanIgetyousomecoffee"Monica:(pointingatRachel)De-caff.(toAll)Okay,everybody,thisisRachel,anotherLincolnHighsurvivor.(toRachel)Thisiseverybody,thisisChandler,andPhoebe,andJoey,and-youremembermybrotherRoss"Rachel:Hi,sure!Ross:Hi.(TheygotohugbutRoss'sumbrellaopens.

Hesitsbackdowndefeatedagain.

AmomentofsilencefollowsasRachelsitsandtheotherse*pecthertoe*plain.)Monica:Soyouwannatellusnow,orarewewaitingforfourwetbridesmaids"Rachel:OhGod...well,itstartedaboutahalfhourbeforethewedding.Iwasintheroomwherewewerekeepingallthepresents,andIwaslookingatthisgravyboat.ThisreallygorgeousLamaugegravyboat.Whenallofasudden-(tothewaitressthatbroughthercoffee)Sweet'n'Lo"-IrealizedthatIwasmoreturnedonbythisgravyboatthanbyBarry!AndthenIgotreallyfreakedout,andthat'swhenithitme:howmuchBarrylookslikeMr.PotatoHead.Y'know,Imean,Ialwaysknewlookedfamiliar,but...Anyway,Ijusthadtogetoutofthere,andIstartedwondering'WhyamIdoingthis,andwhoamIdoingthisfor"'.(toMonica)SoanywayIjustdidn'tknowwheretogo,andIknowthatyouandIhavekindadriftedapart,butyou'retheonlypersonIknewwholivedhereinthecity.Monica:Whowasn'tinvitedtothewedding.Rachel:Ooh,Iwaskindahopingthatwouldn'tbeanissue...[Scene:Monica'sApartment,everyoneisthereandwatchingaSpanishSoaponTVandaretryingtofigureoutwhatisgoingon.]Monica:NowI'mguessingthatheboughtherthebigpipeorgan,andshe'sreallynothappyaboutit.Chandler:(imitatingthecharacters)Tunaoreggsalad"

Decide!Ross:(inadeepvoice)I'llhavewhateverChristineishaving.Rachel:(onphone)Daddy,Ijust...Ican'tmarryhim!I'msorry.Ijustdon'tlovehim.Well,itmatterstome!(ThesceneonTVhaschangedtoshowtwowomen,oneisholdingherhair.)Phoebe:

IfIletgoofmyhair,myheadwillfalloff.Chandler:(reTV)Ooh,sheshouldnotbewearingthosepants.Joey:Isaypushherdownthestairs.Phoebe,Ross,Chandler,andJoey:

Pushherdownthestairs!Pushherdownthestairs!Pushherdownthestairs!(Sheispusheddownthestairsandeveryonecheers.)Rachel:C'monDaddy,listentome!It'slike,it'slike,allofmylife,everyonehasalwaystoldme,'You'reashoe!You'reashoe,you'reashoe,you'reashoe!'.AndtodayIjuststoppedandIsaid,'WhatifIdon'twannabeashoe"WhatifIwannabea-apurse,y'know"Ora-orahat!No,I'mnotsayingIwantyoutobuymeahat,I'msayingIamaha-It'sametaphor,Daddy!Ross:Youcanseewherehe'dhavetrouble.Rachel:LookDaddy,it'smylife.WellmaybeI'lljuststayherewithMonica.Monica:Well,Iguesswe'veestablishedwho'sstayingherewithMonica...Rachel:Well,maybethat'smydecision.Well,maybeIdon'tneedyourmoney.Wait!!Wait,Isaidmaybe!![TimeLapse,Rachelisbreatingintoapaperbag.]Monica:Justbreathe,breathe..that'sit.Justtrytothinkofnicecalmthings...Phoebe:(sings)Raindropsonrosesandrabbitsandkittens,(RachelandMonicaturntolookather.)bluebellsandsleighbellsand-somethingwithmittens...Lalalala...somethingandnoodleswithstring.

Theseareafew...Rachel:I'mallbetternow.Phoebe:(grinsandwalkstothekitchenandsaystoChandlerandJoey.)Ihelped!Monica:Okay,look,thisisprobablyforthebest,y'know"Independence.Takingcontrolofyourlife.

Thewhole,'hat'thing.Joey:(fortingher)Andhey,youneedanything,youcanalwaysetoJoey.MeandChandlerliveacrossthehall.Andhe'sawayalot.Monica:Joey,stophittingonher!It'sherweddingday!Joey:What,likethere'saruleorsomething"(ThedoorbuzzersoundsandChandlergetsit.)Chandler:Pleasedon'tdothatagain,it'sahorriblesound.Paul:(overtheinter)It's,uh,it'sPaul.Monica:Buzzhimin!Joey:Who'sPaul"Ross:PaultheWineGuy,Paul"Monica:Maybe.Joey:Wait.Your'notarealdate'tonightiswithPaultheWineGuy"Ross:Hefinallyaskedyouout"Monica:Yes!Chandler:Ooh,thisisaDearDiarymoment.Monica:Rach,wait,Icancancel...Rachel:Please,no,go,that'dbefine!Monica:(toRoss)Are,areyouokay"Imean,doyouwantmetostay"Ross:(chokedvoice)That'dbegood...Monica:(horrified)Really"Ross:(normalvoice)No,goon!It'sPaultheWineGuy!Phoebe:Whatdoesthatmean"Doeshesellit,drinkit,orjustplainalot"(Chandlerdoesn'tknow.)(There'saknockonthedoorandit'sPaul.)Monica:Hi,ein!Paul,thisis..(Theyarealllinedupne*ttothedoor.)...everybody,everybody,thisisPaul.All:Hey!Paul!Hi!TheWineGuy!Hey!Chandler:I'msorry,Ididn'tcatchyourname.Paul,wasit"Monica:Okay,umm-umm,I'lljust--I'llberightback,Ijustgottagoah,goah...Ross:Awandering"Monica:Change!

Okay,sitdown.(ShowsPaulin)Twoseconds.Phoebe:Ooh,Ijustpulledoutfoureyelashes.Thatcan'tbegood.(Monicagoestochange.)Joey:

Hey,Paul!Paul:Yeah"Joey:Here'salittletip,shereallylikesitwhenyourubherneckinthesamespotoverandoverandoveragainuntilitstartstogetalittlered.Monica:(yellingfromthebedroom)Shutup,Joey!Ross:SoRachel,what'reyou,uh...what'reyouuptotonight"Rachel:Well,IwaskindasupposedtobeheadedforArubaonmyhoneymoon,sonothing!Ross:Right,you'renotevengettingyourhoneymoon,God..No,no,although,Aruba,thistimeofyear...talkaboutyour-(thinks)-biglizards...Anyway,ifyoudon'tfeellikebeingalonetonight,JoeyandChandlerareingovertohelpmeputtogethermynewfurniture.Chandler:(deadpan)Yes,andwe'reverye*citedaboutit.Rachel:Wellactuallythanks,butIthinkI'mjustgonnahangoutheretonight.

It'sbeenkindaalongday.Ross:Okay,sure.Joey:HeyPheebs,youwannahelp"Phoebe:Oh,IwishIcould,butIdon'twantto.mercialBreak[Scene:TheSubway,Phoebeissingingforchange.]Phoebe:(singing)Loveissweetassummershowers,loveisawondrousworkofart,butyourloveohyourlove,yourlove...islikeagiantpigeon...crappingonmyheart.

La-la-la-la-la-(someguygiveshersomechangeandtothatguy)Thankyou.(sings)La-la-la-la...ohhh![Scene:Ross'sApartment,theguysarethereassemblingfurniture.]Ross:(squattingandreadingtheinstructions)I'msupposedtoattachabracketythingtothesidethings,usingabunchoftheselittlewormguys.Ihavenobracketything,Iseenowhimguyswhatsoeverand-Icannotfeelmylegs.(JoeyandChandlerarefinishingassemblingthebookcase.)Joey:I'mthinkingwe'vegotabookcasehere.Chandler:It'sabeautifulthing.Joey:(pickingupaleftoverpart)What'sthis"Chandler:Iwouldhavetosaythatisan'L'-shapedbracket.Joey:Whichgoeswhere"Chandler:Ihavenoidea.(JoeychecksthatRossisnotlookinganddumpsitinaplant.)Joey:Donewiththebookcase!Chandler:Allfinished!Ross:(clutchingabeercanandsniffing)ThiswasCarol'sfavoritebeer.Shealwaysdrankitoutofthecan,Ishouldhaveknown.Joey:Hey-hey-hey-hey,ifyou'regonnastartwiththatstuffwe'reouttahere.Chandler:Yes,pleasedon'tspoilallthisfun.Joey:Ross,letmeaskyouaquestion.Shegotthefurniture,thestereo,thegoodTV-whatdidyouget"Ross:Youguys.Chandler:Oh,God.Joey:Yougotscrewed.Chandler:OhmyGod![Scene:ARestaurant,MonicaandPaulareeating.]Monica:OhmyGod!Paul:Iknow,Iknow,I'msuchanidiot.IguessIshouldhavecaughtonwhenshestartedgoingtothedentistfourandfivetimesaweek.Imean,howcleancanteethget"Monica:Mybrother'sgoingthroughthatrightnow,he'ssuchamess.Howdidyougetthroughit"Paul:Well,youmighttryaccidentallybreakingsomethingvaluableofhers,sayher-Monica:-leg"Paul:(laughing)That'soneway!Me,I-Iwentforthewatch.Monica:Youactuallybrokeherwatch"

Wow!

TheworstthingIeverdidwas,I-Ishreddedbyboyfriend'sfavoritebathtowel.Paul:Ooh,steerclearofyou.Monica:That'sright.[Scene:Monica'sApartment,Rachelistalkingonthephoneandpacing.]Rachel:Barry,I'msorry...Iamsosorry...IknowyouprobablythinkthatthisisallaboutwhatIsaidtheotherdayaboutyoumakinglovewithyoursockson,butitisn't...itisn't,it'saboutme,andIju-(Shestopstalkinganddialsthephone.)Hi,machinecutmeoffagain...anyway...look,look,IknowthatsomegirlisgoingtobeincrediblyluckytobeeMrs.BarryFinkel,butitisn'tme,it'snotme.

AndnotthatIhaveanyideawhomeisrightnow,butyoujusthavetogivemeachancetoo...(Themachingcutsheroffagainandsheredials.)[Scene:Ross'sApartment;RossispacingwhileJoeyandChandlerareworkingonsomemorefurniture.]Ross:I'mdivorced!

I'monly26andI'mdivorced!Joey:Shutup!Chandler:Youmuststop!(Chandlerhitswhatheisworkingonwithahammeranditcollapses.)Ross:Thatonlytookmeanhour.Chandler:Look,Ross,yougottaunderstand,betweenuswehaven'thadarelationshipthathaslastedlongerthanaMento.

You,howeverhavehadtheloveofawomanforfouryears.

Fouryearsofclosenessandsharingattheendofwhichsherippedyourheartout,andthatiswhywedon'tdoit!

Idon'tthinkthatwasmypoint!Ross:Youknowwhatthescariestpartis"Whatifthere'sonlyonewomanforeverybody,y'know"Imeanwhatifyougetonewoman-andthat'sit"Unfortunatelyinmycase,therewasonlyonewoman-forher...Joey:Whatareyoutalkingabout"'Onewoman'"That'slikesayingthere'sonlyoneflavoroficecreamforyou.Lemmetellyousomething,Ross.There'slotsofflavorsoutthere.There'sRockyRoad,andCookieDough,andBing!CherryVanilla.Youcouldget'emwithJimmies,ornuts,orwhippedcream!Thisisthebestthingthateverhappenedtoyou!Yougotmarried,youwere,like,what,eight"Welebacktotheworld!Grabaspoon!Ross:Ihonestlydon'tknowifI'mhungryorhorny.Chandler:Stayoutofmyfreezer![Scene:ARestaurant,MonicaandPaularestilleating.]Paul:Eversinceshewalkedoutonme,I,uh...Monica:What".....What,youwannaspellitoutwithnoodles"Paul:No,it's,it'smoreofafifthdatekindarevelation.Monica:Oh,sothereisgonnabeafifthdate"Paul:Isn'tthere"Monica:Yeah...yeah,Ithinkthereis.-Whatwereyougonnasay"Paul:Well,ever-ev-...eversincesheleftme,um,Ihaven'tbeenableto,uh,perform.(Monicatakesasipofherdrink.)...Se*ually.Monica:(spittingoutherdrinkinshock)OhGod,ohGod,Iamsorry...Iamsosorry...Paul:It'sokay...Monica:Iknowbeingspitonisprobablynotwhatyouneedrightnow.Um...howlong"Paul:Twoyears.Monica:Wow!I'm-I'm-I'mgladyousmashedherwatch!Paul:Soyoustillthinkyou,um...mightwantthatfifthdate"Monica:(pause)...Yeah.Yeah,Ido.[Scene:Monica'sApartment,RacheliswatchingJoanneLovesChaci.]PriestonTV:WearegatheredheretodaytojoinJoanneLouiseCunninghamandCharles,Chachi-Chachi-Chachi,Arcolaintheboundofholymatrimony.Rachel:Oh...see...butJoannelovedChachi!That'sthedifference![Scene:Ross'sApartment,they'reallsittingaroundandtalking.]Ross:(scornful)Grabaspoon.Doyouknowhowlongit'sbeensinceI'vegrabbedaspoon"Dothewords'Billy,don'tbeahero'meananythingtoyou"Joey:Greatstory!

But,Iuh,Igottago,IgotadatewithAndrea--Angela--Andrea...

Ohman,(lookstoChandler)Chandler:Angela'sthescreamer,Andreahascats.Joey:Right.

Thanks.

It'sJune.

I'mouttahere.(E*its.)Ross:Y'know,here'sthething.EvenifIcouldgetittogetherenoughto-toaskawomanout,...whoamIgonnaask"(Hegazesoutofthewindow.)[CuttoRachelstaringoutofherwindow.]mercialBreak[Scene:Monica'sApartment,RachelismakingcoffeeforJoeyandChandler.]Rachel:Isn'tthisamazing"Imean,Ihavenevermadecoffeebeforeinmyentirelife.Chandler:Thatisamazing.Joey:Congratulations.Rachel:Y'know,IfigureifIcanmakecoffee,thereisn'tanythingIcan'tdo.Chandler:IfcaninvadePoland,thereisn'tanythingIcan'tdo.Joey:Listen,whileyou'reonaroll,ifyoufeellikeyougottamakelikeaWesternomeletorsomething...(JoeyandChandlertastethecoffee,grimace,andpouritintoaplantpot.)AlthoughactuallyI'mreallynotthathungry...Monica:(entering,toherself)Ohgood,LennyandSquigyarehere.All:Morning.Goodmorning.Paul:(enteringfromMonica'sroom)Morning.Joey:Morning,Paul.Rachel:Hello,Paul.Chandler:Hi,Paul,isit"(MonicaandPaulwalktothedoorandtalkinalowvoicesotheotherscan'thear.

TheothersmoveMonica'stableclosertothedoorsothattheycan.)Paul:Thankyou!

Thankyousomuch!Monica:Stop!Paul:No,I'mtellingyoulastnightwaslikeumm,allmybirthdays,bothgraduations,plusthebarnraisingsceneinWitness.Monica:We'lltalklater.Paul:Yeah.(Theykiss)Thankyou.(E*its)Joey:Thatwasn'tarealdate"!Whatthehelldoyoudoonarealdate"Monica:Shutup,andputmytableback.All:Okayyy!(Theydoso.)Chandler:Allright,kids,Igottagettowork.IfIdon'tinputthosenumbers,...itdoesn'tmakemuchofadifference...Rachel:So,like,youguysallhavejobs"Monica:Yeah,weallhavejobs.See,that'showwebuystuff.Joey:Yeah,I'manactor.Rachel:Wow!WouldIhaveseenyouinanything"Joey:Idoubtit.Mostlyregionalwork.Monica:Ohwait,wait,unlessyouhappenedtocatchtheReruns'productionofPinocchio,atthelittletheaterinthepark.Joey:Look,itwasajoballright"Chandler:'Look,Gippetto,I'marealliveboy.'Joey:Iwillnottakethisabuse.(Walkstothedoorandopensittoleave.)Chandler:You'reright,I'msorry.(Burstintosonganddancesoutofthedoor.)"OnceIwasawoodenboy,alittlewoodenboy..."Joey:Youshouldbothknow,thathe'sadeadman.

Oh,Chandler"(StartsafterChandler.)Monica:Sohowyoudoingtoday"Didyousleepokay"TalktoBarry"Ican'tstopsmiling.Rachel:Icanseethat.Youlooklikeyousleptwithahangerinyourmouth.Monica:Iknow,he'sjustso,so...DoyourememberyouandTonyDeMarco"Rachel:Oh,yeah.Monica:Well,it'slikethat.Withfeelings.Rachel:Ohwow.Areyouintrouble.Monica:Bigtime!Rachel:Wantaweddingdress"

Hardlyused.Monica:Ithinkwearegettingalittleaheadofselveshere.Okay.Okay.Iamjustgoingtogetup,gotoworkandnotthinkabouthimallday.OrelseI'mjustgonnagetupandgotowork.Rachel:Oh,look,wishmeluck!Monica:Whatfor"Rachel:I'mgonnagogetoneofthose(Thinks)jobthings.(Monicae*its.)[Scene:Iridium,MonicaisworkingasFrannieenters.]Frannie:Hey,Monica!Monica:HeyFrannie,weleback!HowwasFlorida"Frannie:Youhadse*,didn'tyou"Monica:Howdoyoudothat"Frannie:Oh,Ihateyou,I'mpushingmyAuntRozthroughParrotJungleandyou'rehavingse*!

So"Who"Monica:YouknowPaul"Frannie:PaultheWineGuy"Ohyeah,IknowPaul.Monica:YoumeanyouknowPaullikeIknowPaul"Frannie:Areyoukidding"ItakecreditforPaul.Y'knowbeforeme,therewasnosnapinhisturtlefortwoyears.[Scene:CentralPerk,everyonebutRachelisthere.]Joey:(sittingonthearmofthecouch)Ofcourseitwasaline!Monica:Why"!Why"Why,whywouldanybodydosomethinglikethat"Ross:Iassumewe'relookingforananswermoresophisticatedthan'togetyouintobed'.Monica:Ihatemen!

Ihatemen!Phoebe:Ohno,don'thate,youdon'twanttoputthatoutintotheuniverse.Monica:Isitme"IsitlikeIhavesomesortofbeaconthatonlydogsandmenwithsevereemotionalproblemscanhear"Phoebe:Allright,c'mere,gimmeyourfeet.(Shestartsmassagingthem.)Monica:Ijustthoughthewasnice,y'know"Joey:(burstsoutlaughingagain)Ican'tbelieveyoudidn'tknowitwasaline!(MonicapusheshimoffofthesofaasRachelenterswithashoppingbag.)Rachel:Guesswhat"Ross:Yougotajob"Rachel:Areyoukidding"I'mtrainedfornothing!Iwaslaughedoutoftwelveinterviewstoday.Chandler:Andyetyou'resurprisinglyupbeat.Rachel:YouwouldbetooifyoufoundJohnandDavidbootsonsale,fiftypercentoff!Chandler:Oh,howwellyouknowme...Rachel:They'remynew'Idon'tneedajob,Idon'tneedmyparents,I'vegotgreatboots'boots!Monica:How'dyoupayforthem"Rachel:Uh,creditcard.Monica:Andwhopaysforthat"Rachel:Um...my...father.[Scene:MonicaandRachel's,everyoneissittingaroundthekitchentable.

Rachel'screditcardsarespreadoutonthetablealongwithapairofscissors.]Rachel:OhGod,eonyouguys,isthisreallynecessary"

Imean,IcanstopcharginganytimeIwant.Monica:C'mon,youcan'tliveoffyourparentsyourwholelife.Rachel:Iknowthat.That'swhyIwasgettingmarried.Phoebe:Giveherabreak,it'shardbeingonyourownforthefirsttime.Rachel:Thankyou.Phoebe:You'rewele.IrememberwhenIfirstcametothiscity.Iwasfourteen.Mymomhadjustkilledherselfandmystep-dadwasbackinprison,andIgothere,andIdidn'tknowanybody.AndIendeduplivingwiththisalbinoguywhowas,like,cleaningwindshieldsoutsideportauthority,andthenhekilledhimself,andthenIfoundaromatherapy.Sobelieveme,Iknowe*actlyhowyoufeel.(Pause)Ross:Thewordyou'relookingforis'Anyway'...Monica:Allright,youready"Rachel:No.

No,no,I'mnotready!

HowcanIbeready"

"Hey,Rach!

Youreadytojumpouttheairplanewithoutyourparachute""

eon,Ican'tdothis!Monica:Youcan,Iknowyoucan!Rachel:Idon'tthinkso.Ross:eon,youmadecoffee!

Youcandoanything!(ChandlerslowlytriestohidethenowdeadplantfromthatmorningwhenheandJoeypouredtheircoffeeintoit.)Ross:C'mon,cut.Cut,cut,cut,...All:Cut,cut,cut,cut,cut,cut,cut...(Shecutsoneofthemandtheycheer.)Rachel:Y'knowwhat"

Ithinkwecanjustleaveitatthat.

It'skindalikeasymbolicgesture...Monica:

Rachel!

Thatwasalibrarycard!All:Cut,cut,cut,cut,cut,cut,cut..Chandler:(asRacheliscuttinguphercards)Y'know,ifyoulistenclosely,youcanhearathousandretailersscream.(Shefinishescuttingthemupandtheyallcheer.)Monica:Weletotherealworld!Itsucks.You'regonnaloveit![TimeLapse,RachelandRossarewatchingaTVchannelfinishesit'sbroadcastdaybyplayingthenationalanthem.]Monica:Well,that'sit(ToRoss)Yougonnacrashonthecouch"Ross:No.No,Igottagohomesometime.Monica:Youbeokay"Ross:Yeah.Rachel:HeyMon,lookwhatIjustfoundonthefloor.(Monicasmiles.)What"Monica:That'sPaul'swatch.Youjustputitbackwhereyoufoundit.Ohboy.Alright.Goodnight,everybody.RossandRachel:Goodnight.(MonicastompsonPaul'swatchandgoesintoherroom.)Ross:Mmm.(Theybothreachforthelastcookie)Oh,no-Rachel:Sorry-Ross:Nonono,go-Rachel:No,youhaveit,really,Idon'twantit-Ross:Splitit"Rachel:Okay.Ross:Okay.(Theysplitit.)Youknowyouprobablydidn'tknowthis,butbackinhighschool,Ihada,um,majorcrushonyou.Rachel:Iknew.Ross:Youdid!Oh....IalwaysfiguredyoujustthoughtIwasMonica'sgeekyolderbrother.Rachel:Idid.Ross:Oh.Listen,doyouthink-andtrynottoletmyintensevulnerabilitybeeanykindofafactorhere-butdoyouthinkitwouldbeokayifIaskedyouout"Sometime"Maybe"Rachel:Yeah,maybe...Ross:Okay...okay,maybeIwill...Rachel:Goodnight.Ross:Goodnight.(RachelgoesintoherroomandMonicaentersthelivingroomasRossisleaving.)Monica:Seeya....Waitwait,what'swithyou"Ross:Ijustgrabbedaspoon.(Rosse*itsandMonicahasnoideawhatthatmeans.)ClosingCredits[Scene:CentralPerk,everyoneisthere.]Joey:Ican'tbelievewhatI'mhearinghere.Phoebe:(sings)Ican'tbelievewhatI'mhearinghere...Monica:What"I-Isaidyouhada-Phoebe:(sings)WhatIsaidyouhad...Monica:(toPhoebe)Wouldyoustop"Phoebe:Oh,wasIdoingitagain"All:Yes!Monica:Isaidthatyouhadanicebutt,it'sjustnotagreatbutt.Joey:Oh,youwouldn'tknowagreatbuttifitcameupandbitya.Ross:There'sanimage.Rachel:(walksupwithapotofcoffee)Wouldanybodylikemorecoffee"Chandler:Didyoumakeit,orareyoujustservingit"Rachel:I'mjustservingit.All:Yeah.Yeah,I'llhaveacupofcoffee.Chandler:Kids,newdream...I'minLasVegas.(RachelsitsdowntohearChandler'sdream.)Customer:(ToRachel)Ahh,miss"

Morecoffee"Rachel:Ugh.(Toanothercustomerthat'sleaving.)E*cuseme,couldyougivethistothatguyoverthere"(Handshimthecoffeepot.)Goahead.(Hedoesso.)Thankyou.(Tothegang.)Sorry.

Okay,LasVegas.Chandler:Okay,so,I'minLasVegas...I'mLizaMinelli-End101試播莫妮卡的新室友沒什么好說的！他不過是我的同事！少來了，你和那個人一起出去！拜托，和你交往的男人一定有問題！打住，喬伊，嘴下留德。他駝背？既駝背又帶假發(fā)？慢著，他吃粉筆嗎？我只是不想你重蹈我和卡爾的覆轍。各位別急，這不算約會。我們不過是出去吃晚餐，而且不做愛。聽起來好似是說我的約會。記得中學(xué)時代的夢，我站在自助餐廳，突然發(fā)現(xiàn)自己全身赤裸。我做過那樣的夢。我低頭一看，看見有一支……在那兒。而不是……？沒錯。我沒做過那樣的夢,沒有。那支突然響起，而我不知道怎么辦，每個人都開場望著我。他們以前不看你嗎？！終于，我認(rèn)為我應(yīng)該接，結(jié)果是我媽打來，我感到很奇怪，因?yàn)槲覌尣辉蜻^給我！嗨。這家伙向我打招呼時我就想自殺。你還好吧？我感覺有人把手伸入我的喉嚨，抓起我的腸子，從我的口中取出，然后綁在我脖上……餅干？卡羅今天把她的東西搬走了。-我?guī)湍闩荼Х?，謝了。不要……別清理我的靈氣?？墒恰瓌e碰我的靈氣就是了。好吧，保持倒霉！我會沒事的，真的，我祝她幸福。-不，你不會的，沒錯，-我不會的，去她的，她甩掉我！而且你一直都不知道她是女同性戀者。沒有??！行了吧？！為何大家都圍著這個話題打轉(zhuǎn)？連她不知道，我怎會知道。有時真希望自己也是個女同志。我剛剛大聲說出來了嗎？昨晚我告訴我父母，他們好似還挺好。真的嗎，凌晨三點(diǎn)我接到一個，一個女人歇斯底里的向我哭訴，"我不能抱孫子了，我不能抱孫子了。〞那是什么？打錯了？對不起。別悶悶不樂了，羅斯。你現(xiàn)在很痛苦。你一肚子火,心如刀割。我能告訴你解決之道嗎？脫衣舞酒店。你單身，有性需求。我不想單身的。我只想再結(jié)婚。我只想要一百萬！瑞秋？！天啊，莫妮卡，謝天謝地！我到過你的住處，你不在。有個拿著一根大榔頭的人說你可能會在這兒，結(jié)果你真的在這兒。想來杯咖啡嗎？無咖啡因的。各位，她叫瑞秋，另一位從林肯高中生存下來的人。這位叫錢德勒，菲比，喬伊。還記得我哥羅斯嗎？當(dāng)然。嗨。你想現(xiàn)在告訴我們，還是等四位伴娘來了再說？婚禮前半個小時發(fā)生了變數(shù)。我在堆放禮物的房間里，看著船形鹵肉盤，非常漂亮的船形鹵肉盤，突然間……〔有沒有代糖？〕我了解船形鹵肉盤此巴瑞更能引起我的"性趣〞，我自己都嚇了一跳，巴瑞愈看愈像豬頭先生。我一直都認(rèn)為他很眼熟?？傊?我必須離開。我開場想，我為何這么做？我為誰這樣做？于是我不知該走往何處，我知道你我日漸疏遠(yuǎn)。但是你是我在這個城市，認(rèn)識的唯一一個人。沒被受邀參加婚禮的人。這件事就甭提啦。我猜他送她一臺管風(fēng)琴，她肯定不喜歡，金槍魚還是雞蛋沙拉？快決定！我要擁有克莉絲汀擁有的一切。爸，我不能嫁給他……對不起，我只是不愛他。對，這對我來說就有關(guān)系！如果我沒了頭發(fā)，還不如去死。她不該穿那條褲子。我建議推她下樓，推她下樓！推她下樓！推她下樓！爸，你聽我說……大家這樣評價(jià)我這一輩子：你是一只鞋……今天我倒想看看如果我不再是鞋會怎樣。我說如果我想當(dāng)皮包呢？或是帽子呢？不，我不需你幫我買帽子。我說我是一頂帽子。爸，這是一種比喻。你看他也有些問題。爸，這是我的人生?；蛟S我會和莫妮卡住在這。我想我們已確定好誰要和莫妮卡住在這兒?；蛟S那是我的決定?；蛟S我不希罕你的錢。等一下，等一下……我說的是或許??！深呼吸，就這樣。試著想著美好的事物……玫瑰上的雨滴，貓嘴上的胡須，門鈴和雪橇之類的。啦啦啦……還有手套……我現(xiàn)在好多了。我的功績?；蛟S這樣最好，要自立，決定自己的事情。有任何需要找喬伊準(zhǔn)沒錯。我和錢德勒就住在對面，而且他經(jīng)常不在家。喬伊,少趁虛而入了，今天是她大喜的日子。什么？有規(guī)定不能嗎？別再這樣，聲音很刺耳。我是保羅。讓他進(jìn)來！保羅是誰？調(diào)酒的那個保羅？或許吧。等等,你今晚該不是真的要和調(diào)酒的那個保羅約會吧？他終于開口約你了？對。這是值得被永久銘記的時刻。瑞秋，等等，我可以取消。不用了，你去吧，我不會有事的。羅斯，你沒事吧。你要我留下來嗎？那樣最好……真的嗎？-假的，去吧！是保羅，調(diào)酒師耶！什么意思？他是賣酒的，喝酒的，還是評酒的？請進(jìn)！保羅，這位是…………各位，各位，他就是保羅。保羅……調(diào)酒大師。抱歉，我沒聽清楚你名字。保羅，是嗎？我馬上就好，我去，去……神魂恍惚啦？換衣服！請坐，兩秒鐘。我剛拔掉四根睫毛，不妙。嗨，保羅！嗯，有何指教？一個小秘密，莫妮卡其實(shí)就喜歡這樣，你摩擦她脖子同一個地方，直到那里開場有點(diǎn)發(fā)紅。喬伊你給我閉嘴！瑞秋，你打算如何渡過今晚？我應(yīng)該在前往阿魯巴渡蜜月的途中，因此沒了！我懂，你沒去渡蜜月。雖然阿魯巴在此時……有很多……大蜥蜴，如果你今晚不想獨(dú)處，喬伊和錢德勒要到我那兒幫我組合新家俱，對，我們都相當(dāng)興奮。謝謝，但我今晚想待在這兒，我折磨了一天。好吧，當(dāng)然。菲此，想幫助嗎？我可以去，但我不去。愛情似炎炎夏日中的陣雨般美妙，.啦-啦-啦-啦-啦-謝謝。我應(yīng)該用蝸桿將托架裝在側(cè)面，但我沒看見托架和蝸桿，而且，我的腳好麻。我想我們做好書架了。真漂亮。這是什么？我只能說這是個"L〞型托架。是哪兒的？我也不知道。書架做好了！終于做好了！這是卡羅最愛喝的啤酒。