貝恩－有效溝通-clientskillw2課件

Francesassumedthatcriticismshouldbetemperedwithpraiseincludingpraiseequalizestheotherwiseone-downpositionJohnrecognizedtheritualheardpraiseasfirststepofpatternappreciatedtactofapproachunderstoodthatcriticismwasthemainmessageAlassumedfeedbackwouldbedirectshouldbedirect:whatissaidisthemessageFrancetoldhimeverythingwasfinecriticismwassuggestionratherthandirectionSource:Source:Tannen,Deborah,“TalkingFrom9to5”,AvonBooks,1994;Tannen,Deborah,“YouJustDon’tUnderstand”,BallantineBooks,NewYork,1990

AnalysisofStyle-GivingFeedback(2of2)1cmnctnstl2Source:Tannen,Deborah,“TalkingFrom9to5”,AvonBooks,1994;Tannen,Deborah,“YouJustDon’tUnderstand”,BallantineBooks,NewYork,1990HierarchyEqualityStyleAssumptions:StyleAssumptions:BluntfeedbackisdirectandhonestFeedbackisaboutbusiness,notfeelingsBluntfeedbackiscallousandharshTherelationshipisasimportantasthemessageImportanttobetactful;includepraiseGivingcriticismisaninherentlyone-uppositionitcan’tbedisguisedOne-upnatureneedstobeequalized“Saveface”byprovidingpraiseaswellascriticismStylisticNorms-GivingFeedback2cmnctnstl2

IsabelleintroducesanideainameetingItisignoredLaterinthemeeting,Janesuggeststhesameideaagainexpandsonit,sellingittogroupIdeaisadopted;JanereceivescreditNeitherIsabellenorJaneacknowledgetheideaasIsabelle’sInitiatinggoodideasisnotenough.Youalsohavetogetcreditforthem.Source:Tannen,Deborah,“TalkingFrom9to5”,AvonBooks,1994;Tannen,Deborah,“YouJustDon’tUnderstand”,

BallantineBooks,NewYork,1990

StyleinAction-GettingCreditforYourIdeas(1of2)3cmnctnstl2Source:Tannen,Deborah,“TalkingFrom9to5”,AvonBooks,1994;Tannen,Deborah,“YouJustDon’tUnderstand”,BallantineBooks,NewYork,1990HierarchyEqualityStyleAssumptions:StyleAssumptions:SeekvisibilityDownplaydoubtsotherwiseyou’llappearinsecureClaimcreditforyourideasSeekequalexposureDownplaycertaintyotherwiseyou’llappearboastfulGoodworkwillberecognizedShiftstatusuponebyclaimingcreditMaintainequalstatusbyneverclaimingcreditStylisticNorms-GettingCreditforYourIdeas5cmnctnstl2

CanYouUseThisModule?HowCommunicationWorksCommunicationandPerceptionStylesintheWorkplaceCommunicatingatBainUnderstandingYourIndividualStyleManagingCommunicationatBainAgenda6cmnctnstl2

DirectcommunicationAggressiveinteractionPro-activeproblem-solvingIdeaassessmentbychallengeBain’sdominantstylereflectsmanyhierarchicalcharacteristics.Stylefavors:Bain’sNorm(1of2)7cmnctnstl2

Bain’sdominantstyleevolvedfromworkandclientneedsStylesupportsworkdirectcommunicationisfast;bestforshorttimeframedisplayslogicclearlysoproblemscanbefoundquicklyStylemeetsclientneedsclientswantstronganalysispresentedclearlyexpectsBaintodrivedecisionsthroughtheirorganizationStylepreparesteamforclientinteractionchallengingideasincaseteamanticipateschallengesfromclientmatchespredominantstyleofmanyclientsWhyItIstheWayItIs9cmnctnstl2

CanYouUseThisModule?HowCommunicationWorksCommunicationandPerceptionStylesintheWorkplaceCommunicatingatBainUnderstandingYourIndividualStyleManagingCommunicationatBainAgenda10cmnctnstl2

Beginbyconsideringthefollowingcharacteristics:Source:Tannen,Deborah,“TalkingFrom9to5”,AvonBooks,1994;Tannen,Deborah,“YouJustDon’tUnderstand”,BallantineBooks,NewYork,1990HowDoIKnowWhatMyStyleIs?(1of2)11cmnctnstl2Keyphrasestolistenfor:“Youjustdon’tseemconfident”“Don’tworryaboutwhetheryourideasareperfect,justgetthemoutthere”“Yourideasarehardtofollow”“Youhavetogettothepointfaster”“Youtakethingstoopersonally”“Youneedtobemorevisible”“Youneedtodevelopyourleadershipskills”Therearecertainperformanceproblemsthatareoftenattributabletoaclashincommunicationstyles--eventhoughtheyseemtoaddresssomethingelse.Source:Tannen,Deborah,“YouJustDon’tUnderstand”,BallantineBooks,NewYork,1990

HowDoIKnowIfThere’saProblem?(1of3)13cmnctnstl2Lookatthesituationobjectively.Getfeedbackfrommanagersandfriends.ConsideryourexperienceAreyouoftenfrustratedinyourjob?Aretheperceptionsofotherssignificantlydifferentfromhowyouseeyourself?Dopeoplegrantyoulesscompetencethanyouthinkyoudeserve?ConsiderfeedbackDoothersidentifycommunicationproblems?ConsiderthepossibilityDeterminewhich,orwhichpartoftheseproblemscouldresultfromcommunicationstyleclashHowDoIKnowIfThere’saProblem?(2of3)14cmnctnstl2Operatingoutsidethegroupnormcanhavepotentiallysignificantconsequences.Source:Tannen,Deborah,“YouJustDon’tUnderstand”,BallantineBooks,NewYork,1990StyleclashescanimpactyouandassessmentofyourperformanceTakingstylisticbehaviorsliterallycanresultindiscomfortandfrustrationchallengesfeellikepersonalattacksopportunitiestobehearddon’tpresentthemselvesyourstylisticbehaviormaybetakenliterallyFrequentpausesperceivedaslackofconfidencePerceptioncouldimpactperformanceassessmentFrequentpausesperceivedasweakanalysisHowDoIKnowIfThere’saProblem?(3of3)15cmnctnstl2

Youcanlearntooperateeffectivelyinnormsotherthanyourown

Noone’sstyleisabsolutecanlearntooperateeffectivelyinothernormsunderstandingwhypeopleactastheydodevelopabilitytomatchstylisticbehaviorsChangingisnotnecessarilyeasytakesawareness,focusandtimeSource:Tannen,Deborah,“YouJustDon’tUnderstand”,BallantineBooks,NewYork,1990CanIChange?17cmnctnstl2

Flexibilityisthekeyinsteadofchanging,expandyourstyleAddnewbehaviorstoyourcorestyleuseascalledforbysituationexpandthesituationsinwhichyouareeffectiveDevelopabilitytocommunicatesuccessfullyinrangeofenvironmentsInsteadofchangingyourstyle,youcanexpandyourstyleSource:Tannen,Deborah,“YouJustDon’tUnderstand”,BallantineBooks,NewYork,1990ShouldIChange?18cmnctnstl2

RememberthatlearningnewstylebehaviorscanbedifficulttakestimeDevelopaplanthatprogressesinsmallsteps:Identifyonebehaviortolearn(forinstance,avoidingdisclaimersorsubstitutinginquiriesforchallenges)Plantopracticeonebehavioronceortwiceinanyonesituation(i.e.acaseteammeeting)LookforotheropportunitiestopracticecasualconversationvoicemailisgreatforpracticingAnswer-FirstDevelopaplanforintegratingnewstylisticbehaviorsHowDoIExpandMyStyle?(1of5)19cmnctnstl2

ProvideasourceofsupportandfeedbackinvolveyourmanagerorcaseteamleaderhookupwithapartnerAfriend,caseteammember,orcoachCelebratesuccessesReinforcesmallwinsaswellaslargeOnceyou’vedecidedonyourplan,takestepstoensuresuccessHowDoIExpandMyStyle?(3of5)21cmnctnstl2

Targetsituation(s)toobservecaseteammeetings clientmeetingspresentationsAnalyzewhatcontributestothemetamessagemessagecontentrelationshipbetweenparticipantsactivityatmosphereReallygettoknowyouraudience.HowCanIExpandMyStyle?(4of5)22cmnctnstl2

IdentifyyourhighestimpactmisseswithlistenergroupdecideonalternatebehaviortopracticeUseanyresourcesavailabletoprepareyourcommunicationAnswer-FirststructurecoachormentorGetinputfromsomeonewhoknowsthesituationmanagercaseteamleaderothercaseteammembermemberofclientteamSpendasmuchtimeplanninghowyou’llcommunicateasyoudowhatyou’llcommunicateHowDoIExpandMyStyle?(5of5)23cmnctnstl2

UseAnswer-Firsttostructurecommunicationsprovidebackground,complication,questionandanswerworkfrombroadconceptstospecificevidenceusestructuretoleveragetheirtimeprovidedetailsonlyasneededbylistenerhighlightkeyconcepts,outstandingissues,openquestionspresentyourrecommendationswithoutqualificationsUseshortsentences,activelanguageSource:Minto,Barbara,“ThePyramidPrinciple”,FTPitmanPublishing,1987;BainCommunicationSkillsWorkshopHowDoICommunicateClearly?(1of2)25cmnctnstl2

Stateideasdirectly,withoutneedforinterpretation“IagreewithMaria.Weshoulddomoreinterviews.”insteadof“Mariahassomegoodinterestingpoints.Wecertainlycoulddomoreinterviews.Maybeweshould.Ofcourse,itwouldtakemoretime.”Stateideaswithoutdisclaimers“BillJohnson’sanexpertinthisarea.Weshouldtalktohim.”Insteadof“Thismaysoundlikeacrazyidea,andit’snotexactlythedirectionwe’reheading,butmaybeweshouldthinkabouttalkingtoBillJohnson.Imean,Ithinkhe’sdonealotofworkinthisarea,butIcouldbewayoffbase.”Source:Tannen,Deborah,“YouJustDon’tUnderstand”,BallantineBooks,NewYork,1990

HowDoICommunicateClearly?(2of2)26cmnctnstl2

CanYouUseThisModule?HowCommunicationWorksCommunicationandPerceptionStylesintheWorkplaceCommunicatingatBainUnderstandingYourIndividualStyleManagingCommunicationatBainAgenda29cmnctnstl2

Performanceproblemsliketheseusuallyattributedtolackofcompetence:lacksconfidence,seemsinsecuredoesn’ttakedirectionwellmicro-managesjustdoesn’tcatchonRootcauseofperformanceproblemmightbecommunicationinsteadofcompetenceManagingStyles:UnderstandingtheProblem30cmnctnstl2

Sourceofproblemcouldbecommunicationstyles:ManagingStyles:UnderstandingtheProblem31cmnctnstl2

Distinguishwhatobservablebehaviorsleadtoyourassessment:Assessment: can’tdotheworkBehaviors: doesn’tgetassignedworkdone,ideasdon’t

makesenseAssessment: can’tlead,nosenseofauthorityBehaviors: directionsaren’tclear,norespectfromthe peoplewhoreporttohim/herFirststep:SeparatebehaviorsfromassessmentManagingStyles:HowDoYouKnowWhattheProblemIs?32cmnctnstl2

LookatthesituationobjectivelyrememberthatyourstylecanblindyoutootherstylesConsiderwhatcouldbetheresultofcommunicationstylesdoesn’tgetassignedworkdone,ideasdon’tmakesensecompletesthework,butdoesn’tspeakupinmeetingspresentsideasindirectlyinsteadofdirectlydirectionsaren’tclear,norespectfromthepeoplewhoreporttohim/hergivessuggestionsinsteadofordersConsiderwhatpartcommunicationmightplayintheproblemManagingStyles:HowDoYouKnow...(1of2)33cmnctnstl2

Consideradditionalinformationyouhavedoesn’tgetassignedworkdone,ideasdon’tmakesensehaveaskeddirectlyifassignmentswerecompleted;theywereinone-on-onemeetingcouldclearlyexplainideasConsideradditionalinformationyouneedmayneedtodiscussthesituationandgatherinformationfromtheindividualfromotherswhoknowthesituationfromotherswhoknowmoreaboutcommunicatingMakeadecisionbasedonthedatastylemaybeall,partof,ornoneoftheproblemTestthepossibilityagainstreality,anddecideManagingStyles:HowDoYouKnow...(2of2)34cmnctnstl2

Eachperson’scommunicationstyleisasnaturaltothemasbreathingtheirstyleisinvisibletothemitisanintegralpartofwhotheyareanyproblem--iftheyareawareofit--isn’ttheirsfromtheirperspective,everyoneelsehastheproblemfromtheirperspective,theyarerightYourperspectiveandpointofviewonthesituationisinfluencedbyyourownstyleweallthinkourstyleis“right”yourbiasmaycauseresistanceinthelistenerpositionalthinkingwillnotmotivatesomeonetochange TherearekeypointstoremembertomakecoachingcommunicationsuccessfulManagingStyles:PreparingtoCoach(1of2)35cmnctnstl2

Changingstylemayseemaneasyandobvioussolutiontoyouconsequently,youmayexpectthemtogreetyoursuggestionwithglee,andgetrightonitTothem,itmayseemthreatening,impossible,oreveninsultingmayhearthatwhotheyareiswrongmayhavenoideahowtomakechangesmayfeel(strongly)thenormiswrong,anditshouldchangeEveniftheywanttochange,doingsocanbedifficultthehabitstheyhaveareingrained,oftenfrombirthsuccessfulinthesystemtheyaremostfamiliarwithConsiderthesituationfromtheirpointofviewManagingStyles:PreparingtoCoach(2of2)36cmnctnstl2

Themessageis:allstylesareequallyvalidasstylesoneisnotquantifiablybetterthananotherallstylescanworkwellwithotherswhosharethatstylebutallstylesdonotworkequallywellineverysituationtheirstyleisnotworkingwellinthissettingtobemoreeffective,recommendtheyexpandtheirstyleBeclearonthemessageManagingStyles:BeforeYouStart37cmnctnstl2

Identifyandhelpthemunderstandtheproblemstatetheproblemingeneraldescribespecificbehaviorsthatillustratetheproblem(i.e.beingquietincaseteammeetings)askaboutwhytheyactthewaytheydo(theirintendedcommunication)providefeedbackonhowbehaviorisperceivedhelpthemseethe“miss”Suggestpossibilityofaclashincommunicationstylesemphasizeproblemissituational,notpersonaltheirstyledoesnotworkwellinthissettingTherearespecificstepstoconveythemessage.First,introducetheproblem.ManagingStyles:IntheCoachingSession(1of4)38cmnctnstl2

Explaincommunicationstyles:whattheyare,howtheyworkgeneralconceptstylesandhowtheyworkBain’snormspecificapplicationuseexamplesatBainotherswhohavehadsimilarstylecharacteristicsotherswhohavehadstyleclashesfocusonexplainingandgettingbuy-inontheproblemaddresssolutionslaterNext,explaincommunicationstyles--ingeneral,andinthissituationManagingStyles:IntheCoachingSession(2of4)39cmnctnstl2

ExplainvalueofBain’snormincaseteamsituationsatclientsRecommendexpandingstyleinordertobettermatchBain’snormgiveexamplesEmphasizethatyouareseekingaresult:changedbehaviorhowtheycorrecttheproblemistheirchoiceExplainconsequences(ifany)ofstatusquoHelpthemunderstandwhyBainisthewayitis,thensuggesthowtheycanincreaseeffectivenessinthisnorm.ManagingStyles:IntheCoachingSession(3of4)40cmnctnstl2

Bepreparedto:addressresistance/concerns“WhyshouldIchange?They’retheoneswhoarerude.”“Areyousayingthereissomethingwrongwithme?”discusspro’sandconshigherlevelofeffectivenessinmoresituationsitisn’teasy;takesconcentration;processmaybeslowProvidesuggestionsandresourcesOnceyouhaveexplainedthesituation,provideopportunitytorespondManagingStyles:IntheCoachingSession(4of4)41cmnctnstl2

Remember,thesituationisneutralaclashinstylesnotaresultofconscious,problematicbehaviornooneisatfaultFocusonexpandingskills,notdumpingoldstyleinfavorofnewoneUsespecificexamplesgeneralexamplesillustratetheconceptspecificexamples,storiesmaketheconceptrealCoachingprocesshasstrongimpactonsuccess.Changeshouldbepresentedasbeneficialandpossible;coachshoulddemonstrateempathyManagingStyles:CoachingTips(1of2)42cmnctnstl2

Beginbydiscussingconcretebehaviors,notperceptionsstartwith,“Youdon’tshareyourideasincaseteammeetings”not“Youseemtolackconfidence”Next,maketheconnectionbetweenbehaviorandperception“Youmaybewaitingbecauseyouwanttobe100%sureofwhatyousay,“buttheresultisaperceptionthatyouarehesitantanduncertain.”TreatthesituationseriouslyacknowledgethatchanginghabitsishardManagingStyles:CoachingTips(2of2)43cmnctnstl2

Inordertoincreasedirectness:stateideaswithoutqualificationorhedging.“IagreewithMaria.Weneedtodomoreinterviews.”insteadof“Mariahassomegenerallyinterestingpoints.Wecertainlycoulddomoreinterviews.Ofcourse,itwouldtakemoretime.”stateideaswithoutdisclaimers:“BillJohnson’sanexpertinthisarea.Weshouldtalktohim.”insteadof“Thismayjustbeacrazyidea,andit’snotexactlythedirectionwe’reheading,butmaybeweshouldthinkabouttalkingtoBillJohnson.Imean,Ithinkhe’sdonealotofworkinthisarea,butmaybeI’mwayoffbase.”ThemostcommonstyleclashesatBainareintheareasofdirectnessandclaimingownershipofideas.ManagingStyles:WhattoDo(1of3)44cmnctnstl2

Toincreasedirectness:focusonreportinginformationinsteadofbuildingrapport